Ms. Infinity (Book 2): Where Infinity Begins

by Kirschner, Andrew

  “Bonnie!” said Lisa. “That was amazing what I just saw!”

  “I know!” said Bonnie defensively, “I saw it too ‘cause I was here the whole time! So of course I saw the whole thing too, cause I was watching too, so you know, I saw it, just like you did…”

  “Bonnie,” said Lisa in dismay, “Isn’t there something you wanted to say to me?”

  “Uh, what? Why would I? Uh…hah! No. That’s silly. No. There’s nothing. Why would there be? Why would you even ask…”

  “But you said to me…I mean…”

  Bonnie was silent, but her eyes showed tremendous anxiety. Lisa could see that pressing the point was just going to lead to another uncomfortable moment. “Alright! Alright!” she said in a disappointed tone, “Whatever!”

  Bonnie looked back at Lisa for a moment. She almost seemed like she was going to say something. But all she did was turn and say, “Let’s go home.”

  “You know,” said Lisa, “I really thought those boots were cool.”

  “Which boots?”

  “Never mind.”

  From here on, the balance finally tipped against Johnny Gunn. Jenna Storm’s report did further damage, and before long the politicians who were in his net, Mayor Shill and Commissioner Strife among them, would be forced to resign in disgrace. Meanwhile NASA soon tied a pair of mysterious space explosions to long-lost Russian nuclear weapons. Uri Presputnik was named in the investigation, and when he was tied to Gunn, he finally faced criminal charges. He was not convicted, but his businesses did take a major hit.

  Betty had urged Bonnie not to hate even the worst criminals, for the cruelest people were often the most tragic. And cruel as Johnny Gunn was, his life was indeed a tragedy. Like any narcissist, he lived and died for the validation of his grossly inflated ego. He had to dominate everyone around him, and command the center of attention, at all times, at all costs. Had he ruled the country, that cost would certainly have included many lives.

  His cult of personality was all-consuming, full of endless and exhaustive testaments to his greatness, especially to his money, the proof of his worthiness. Yet for all the power and privilege that he had and flaunted, he was utterly impoverished inside.

  He had never learned to value himself beyond his monetary value, or his ability to control others. He could not see any other human beings beyond their material use to himself. Other men to him were no more than competition, or at best underlings, while women could never be more to him than objects, extensions of his own vanity. The very idea of loving or being loved unconditionally simply did not exist in his mind. He only understood a hierarchy of “winners and losers.” Life was only worth living if he was on top.

  But being “on top,” as understood by the likes of Gunn, is at best a transitory thing. Though he could not admit it out loud, thoughts of his ultimate downfall haunted him day and night. And he could never be truly convinced of his own greatness. He suffered an insatiable appetite for assurances; no matter the peak, there was always another that he had to attain. But nothing could fill the void that was his hollow inside. For all of his power and success, Johnny Gunn was little different from any other bully. Behind the façade of an invincible force, bent on winning at all costs, was a broken and terrified soul who could not win, no matter what the spoils.

  19. Taking a Plunge

  After dropping off Bonnie late in the evening, Lisa hoped to come home quietly, sneak upstairs, and avoid her mother’s questions. She was dismayed to find both parents outside with cellphones out and frantic expressions on their faces.

  “How could you not call us?” cried Rob.

  Lisa just mumbled. “I…wait. Didn’t Mrs. B. tell you we were…”

  “You called her but not us?”

  “Well Bonnie did and I…”

  “I was sure that you were dead!” shouted Tracy, “You were in the middle of the worst moment in American history and you didn’t even call? This is exactly the kind of thing that my mother ran away from. Let me tell you my Xiofan, she would have been thankful for a cellphone to call her mother!”

  Lisa froze like a trapped animal. Suddenly she thought of one thing to pull herself out of trouble.

  “Well, I did save a life with my CPR training.”

  Tracy and Rob stood still, looking at each other in puzzlement. Finally, Tracy broke the silence. “I’ll handle this.”

  “Oh,” said Rob, “if you need me to…”

  “…I don’t. Come with me, little girl.”

  Lisa walked inside with her mother, feeling like she was heading for an execution. Tracy led her into the living room and motioned to the sofa. “Sit down,” she said.

  “Listen Mom. I should have called you. I’m sorry. I guess in the madness I forgot. I hope it means something that I put my training to use.”

  “Sure it does,” said Tracy as she said down opposite her daughter, “If nothing else, at least you’re not bragging about seeing Ms. Infinity.”

  Lisa looked down on the floor and rolled her eyes. “I was kind of hoping you would care that I accomplished something.”

  “My dear girl, do you know how scared I was? Are you awake now? You have one life, Lisa. One. Are you finally going to do something with it? Of course I’m proud of you for saving a life today. But Lisa, you also were out there shopping in Midtown on a Wednesday afternoon! Most of us productive people cannot say the same.”

  “That’s the problem. Every single move I make, you’re all over it. I can’t blow my nose without you knowing about it and criticizing it!”

  “And if I wasn’t in your face, would you ever do anything? Or would you be a slacker like your friend there!”

  “Mom, please don’t pick on Bonnie. She’s my best friend, and always will be. I sure hope you’re used to that by now.”

  “Lisa dear, I hope you are both friends for life. But I think it’s time that you at least did your own thing and moved on with your own life. Maybe Bonnie can learn from your example.”

  “But what if I did go back to school? Will you trust me to manage myself? Or will it be more of the same. It’s going to be pretty hard to put up with more of that.”

  “So you are thinking about something.”

  “Mom, I asked you something!”

  “And if you want me off your back, there is no better way than to show me that I can depend on you.”

  “But Mom, even this morning you were still bothering me about when I asked the guy out. You know what? Some things are my business.”

  Tracy paused, looking at her daughter thoughtfully. She then spoke with a resigned authority. “You know what? On this matter I will respectfully give way. You win, my dear. You want to ask boys out, that’s your call.”

  Lisa’s eyes picked up. “What? Really?”

  “Sure. You and your friend have some different ideas than I do. But alright. I can come around too if I must. Just because I was raised a certain way, that does mean it need always be that way.

  “You know what’s more important to me? It’s that you used your discretion with him. I’m especially satisfied that you rejected him when he tried to dominate you. In fact, I’m very pleased with you. No man should consider himself your better. Don’t you forget that! Look, you should take your time finding the right man.”

  “That’s good. I’m in no hurry.”

  “I agree. There is no hurry. Relationships, marriage, and love should come in their own time. Remember dear, that feeling of love ends. You want to know the man well before you settle into a permanent marriage. You’ll have to deal with his reality every day for the rest of your life. The priority for now is your career. You need to take care of you.

  “But Lisa dear, I concur. Your other concern is valid too. If you do finally pursue some goals, then I’ll try to give you your space. But don’t expect all things to change. You live under this roof and our rules.”

  “This I know, Mom. I know it only too well.”

  Lisa was exhausted, but somehow she couldn�
�t sleep. After an hour of tossing and turning, she finally sat up and turned on the light.

  Was she upset about something? Not exactly. There was definitely something on her mind. Usually that meant there was something unresolved. But this time it wasn’t that at all. The more she thought about it, the more resolved she became. She knew what she had to do, and there was no longer any need to wait.

  First she tiptoed outside her room. She looked down the stairs. The lights were out. The door to her parents’ bedroom was closed. She snuck up to the door and put her ear against it. Sure enough, she heard her mother’s distinctive snore. Lisa stepped back into her room, and quietly closed the door. She now had a secret of her own to attend to.

  Her secret was deep, deeper even than the one kept by her best friend. No one had learned it, not even those closest to her, though her mother sniffed nonstop for evidence of such things. But this was Lisa’s talent. When she kept a secret, it was absolute. But now at last, it was time to make a move, and finally reveal herself.

  She quietly moved her mattress about a quarter of the way off the bed frame. There was a very slight rip in the fabric on the bottom of the mattress. Lisa had nice small fingers, just perfect for this job. She reached in and pulled out a small slip of paper. On it was written an email address and a password.

  Lisa wrote an email, using the address for the first time; she knew if it were left in her email address book, her mother would find it. She wrote to a contact she had made some months back, a professor whom she thanked for her patience. She then wrote that she was interested if the offer were still good.

  She then found a webpage. This took a few moments. It could not be stored in her browser, since her mother would certainly have noticed it. She entered the password that she had written on her paper, then filled out a long application, to the Queens College Nursing Program.

  “Too late for September,” she said to herself, “Okay. January it is. Either way it’s settled. I’m going to be a nurse.”

  She thought about going to bed, but there was one more thing to do. “Yeah,” she said, “I’m also going to have to apply for financial aid.”

  The next day Hal was shouting at the TV in his room. “Damnit! I still can’t believe I missed it! The goddamn story of a lifetime and I missed it! I should have been the reporter to get Johnny Gunn’s downfall. I could have finally made something of myself! Ugh! Damn this family!”

  After several minutes of alternately shouting and sulking, he finally walked over and shut off his TV. “On top of everything else, I missed Ms. Infinity!”

  The night before their mother had come home, frantic at the news of the country’s brush with chaos, and relieved to find her two children safe. Their had also called several times to check up on them. Hal had chosen not to talk about his frustrated attempt at reporting; there were enough conflicts in the family, and there was no chance of the situation being remedied anyway. Sarah left early in the morning, again with little explanation.

  As the morning wore into noon, Hal picked himself up to make lunch for Stacy. But soon there was fresh trouble.

  “Where’s Mom?” asked Stacy, “She’s supposed to take me to my swimming test today.”

  “That’s today? What if you don’t make it?”

  “It’s the last lesson. I’ll never get the Silver Swimmer Certificate.”

  Hal looked at his watch. “That’s in…oh…like two hours.”

  Hal was nervous now. His father was working his part time job, and his mother had clearly taken the car. Stacy’s swimming lessons were out in Fort Totten, all the way across Queens, well beyond the end of the subway. It would be a long trip on public transit.

  Suddenly Hal’s phone rang. It was his mother. “Hal,” she said, “I’m going to be out for the day. Please take care of Stacy.”

  “Mom,” said Hal, “Stacy has her swim test today!”

  “I’m in New Jersey.”

  “What?!! You’re in Jersey?”

  “I’ll be home by bedtime. I promise. So long.”

  “Wait!” said Hal, “Stacy ‘s going to want to say ‘hi’,’” But it was too late. She had hung up.

  Stacy walked into the living room at that moment. “Was that Mommy?”

  “Oh!” said Hal, “Uh…”

  “It was!” said Stacy, “I can tell! Give me the phone! I’m calling her back!”

  She grabbed Hal’s phone. Hal had a bad feeling in the pit of his stomach. “Stacy,” he said, I think you’d better let me…”

  It was too late. A man had already picked up. “Hey!” said Stacy, “Who are you? Where’s my Mommy?”

  The situation needed no explanation. From the months of arguments between parents, Stacy had pieced a lot together. “Mommy,” she said, “Is that your boyfriend?”

  Hal could not imagine what his mother was saying to her on the other line. But watching his sister’s tears was enough. “Why, Mommy?” she cried, “Why did you leave Daddy? I don’t care! I hate you!” She threw the phone down and ran to her room.

  Hal picked up the phone in absolute shock. He could not even imagine what to say to his mother now. Stoically facing the moment, he spoke. “Hi Mom,” he said weakly.”

  “How could you let her call back?” yelled his mother.

  “She grabbed the phone,” snapped Hal, “I don’t think you could possibly have kept this from her forever!”

  “Look Hal, I was going to tell her very soon. Hal, it’s time you knew. Ron is moving in with us.”

  “He’s what?!!!” shouted Hal in utter shock, “You’re…what? How can…”

  “Both of you are going to meet him next week. Hal, I promise that I wouldn’t do this if I didn’t think it was the best for you two. Oh Hal, please don’t tell Stacy. It will be much better for her if I tell her in person.”

  “This was one hell of a way to find out! Why…I’m sorry, but I’m not comfortable with this!”

  His mother didn’t answer. She simply hung up. He was now alone with his crying sister.

  “Mommy has a boyfriend!” shouted Stacy as she ran over from her room, “I knew it! And now we’ll never see her again!”

  “Stacy, it’s not like that.” said Hal, “She’s coming back tonight…”

  “You’re lying! I heard that!”

  Hal was felt like there was a giant cantaloupe in the bottom of his throat which he could scarcely contain. The task upon him now filled him with dread. He could not deny what was obvious to Stacy, though he had no choice but to hold back on the news that his mother had just given him. He got down on his knees and spoke gently.

  “Stacy honey,” said Hal, “I just talked to Mommy. I promise you that she is coming home. You’re right that she has a boyfriend.”

  Tears began to fill Hal’s eyes as he finished, but Stacy’s face filled with rage. “I hate mommy!” she cried.

  “She still loves you,” said Hal, trying desperately to keep his composure.

  “She’s never coming home! I know it!”

  “She said she’d be home tonight!

  Stacy started crying. “She’s lying, just like she always does! She’s never coming home! And now I’m missing my swim test!”

  Stacy began to throw the plastic cups on the floor. Nothing was damaged—yet. But it was clear that she was in a destructive mood. The bathroom had hardly survived her last outburst. Hal wasn’t sure how the apartment would fare now. As Stacy began to climb on the kitchen table, Hal ran to pick her up and restrain her. Stacy kicked and screamed. Hal held her tightly but gently, working her over to the couch. Stacy freed herself from his grip, then began knocking over the dining room chairs. She was about to break a vase, but Hal grabbed it in the nick of time. She tried to reach it from Hal’s hands, even trying to tackle him, but Hal managed to put it on a high shelf. She then decided to attack the cupboards instead. She climbed up a drawer onto the counter and reached for the fine china. Hal had just enough time to catch her as she grabbed one of their mother’s best plates and
threw it on the floor and watched it shatter. Before Hal could react, Stacy jumped off the counter and ran for her room.

  Hal sat on the couch and caught his breath. His sister was no weakling for a little girl. But he was more concerned than ever. She was acting up a lot now. How much worse would it be once an unfamiliar man moved in?

  He put his face in his hands and cried hard. He felt forlorn and helpless, not even sure where to look for comfort anymore. Only months earlier, he had hopes for beginning an exciting career as a reporter. Now all he could do was watch feebly while his family descended into the abyss.

  After a few minutes, he picked his head up. He walked into his room, and looked once again at the wall with Ms. Infinity paraphernalia. And there again were the words, the same ones she had once said to him, which still rang clear as a bell in his heart, Never Forget the Power You Have Inside You.

  Again it seemed ridiculous, but somehow he still believed. He could not let go of that moment when she had said those words to him personally. They had to mean something, but what?

  He was less hopeful about that reporting job by the day. There was no more hope for his parents’ marriage, though it broke his heart to admit it. And though the thought made him sick to his stomach, there was nothing he could do about that boyfriend either.

  But then there was one thing he could do, though it was difficult without the car. He consulted with his phone for a minute. He cleaned up the plate with a broom and dustpan. He then went over to Stacy’s room and knocked on the door.

  “Stacy, get ready. I’m taking you to your swim test.”

  After a few seconds, Stacy opened her door. “How?”

  “7 train and Q16 bus. Should take about an hour and a half, maybe an hour and forty-five minutes. We’ll make in time.”

  Stacy looked at Hal strangely.

  “I know,” said Hal, “But what else are we going to do? Sit around here? C’mon. Get your suit on. I bet we can be at the Fort Totten pool in time.”

  The “7” train was, as always, packed to the gills. Hal and Stacy only just managed to squeeze onto the train at 61st Street. They were pushed against the door until the first stop, when they were pushed in further by the next deluge of passengers. Hal managed to find a seat for Stacy after a few stops, while he held on to the pole and balanced with the train. Throughout the ride Stacy played with Hal’s phone, wasting the battery nearly to nothing. Doesn’t matter if they can’t reach us, thought Hal, Let them wonder where we are!