Football Daddy

by Ava Walsh

  The bell hanging over the bookstore door tinkled, snapping Olivia out of her thoughts. A customer had walked in! The middle-aged man looked around the shop for a minute, his hands flying over the bookshelves, dragging out titles he thought he wanted. Olivia watched from the till with a smile on her face, ready to recommend books or spark up a conversation that might eventually lead to a sale.

  The man walked out of the store empty-handed. It was almost like the universe was teasing her. She was going to have to go home without having met her target today, bringing her one day closer to losing her job.

  ***

  Olivia parked outside her mother’s house and remained sitting in the car for a few minutes longer. She needed to compose herself before she went it. The door was left open as usual, as her mother was never in a habit to lock the house. Olivia walked in, adding a forced spring to her step and pasting a smile onto her face.

  Her mom was in the living room, in front of the television, with Maya on her lap.

  “Hello, kids,” Olivia greeted them chirpily. Her mom and Maya both turned, both equally happy to see her.

  “Hi, honey. How was your day with Nana?” Olivia reached for her daughter, who grabbed her by the neck and hung from it while they cuddled. Maya had not started talking properly yet, but could say a few words, which always made Olivia proud. She was certain that her daughter was going to be a genius.

  “How was your day?” Jen, Olivia’s mother, asked.

  “Good, good. We had a busy day at the store,” Olivia replied, still hugging her daughter and trying to avoid her mother’s inquisitive stare.

  “Really? I heard from Lucy that they’re planning on closing the store down. Not enough customers.” Jen had folded her arms across her chest and was glaring at Olivia while she spoke.

  “I don’t know why Lucy would say that. The store is doing really well now.” Olivia was still not looking at her mother, instead busying herself with smoothing the delicate blonde curls around Maya’s angelic face.

  “So you’re meeting your targets?” Jen still urged, and Olivia rolled her eyes.

  “Yes, mom. Will you leave it be? I have to go now.” She whipped around quickly, with Maya still in her arms, and rummaged around to pick up the bags that she’d brought over in the morning. Jen was awfully quiet as she watched Olivia clearing up the mess of toys that Maya had made.

  “Olivia,” Jen said, in a low, worried tone.

  “What, mom?”

  “You’ll tell me if things are going badly?”

  “Yes, I will, mom. I can manage it myself.” Olivia positioned Maya on the crook of her hip and then came over to give her mother a quick hug.

  “It’s Maya I’m worried about. She’s going to turn two in a few months, her necessities and expenses are only going to grow.” Jen still had that worried voice as she spoke. Olivia pulled herself away from her mother slowly and looked at her. Olivia knew her mother meant well, but she didn’t want to cause worry.

  “We’ll be fine, mom. Thanks for your help, though.” Olivia tried to smile weakly while stroking her mother’s arm at the same time.

  “Why can’t the father help, too?” Jen hurled the words at her and Olivia turned around to start walking away. Not this again!

  “Don’t start, mom. I told you he doesn’t want to be involved.” Olivia zipped up the bags and started to walk towards the front door.

  “Can’t we sue him and make him pay?” Jen stood up painfully from the couch. Her hip was getting worse.

  “I don’t want him involved either, mom. Please, just forget it.” Olivia had opened the door now and was distractedly smiling at Maya while she played with her earlobe.

  “Olivia…”

  “I have to go now, mom.” She blew her mom a kiss and was out of the door and down the steps when she remembered. She rushed back into the house and found Jen still standing in the middle of the living room where she had left her.

  “Can I drop Maya off on Saturday afternoon for a few hours? Sophie is going to be in town,” Olivia asked, and Jen nodded.

  “Of course, honey.” Jen smiled at her daughter, with a little sadness in her eyes.

  “Thanks, mom. See you Saturday,” Olivia said, with a quick wave, and was off towards the car again.

  “Hi, baby. Sorry I was late again today. We’ll go home straight away, won’t we?” She was settling Maya into the car seat as she spoke. She liked to chat with her casually like she was already a grown up. The truth was that Olivia didn’t have anybody else to talk to. The bookstore was always empty, her own apartment was devoid of any adults and she had lost touch with all her friends because she didn’t have the time for them.

  So Maya was the only person she could actually have conversations with. Olivia settled into her own seat and strapped the seatbelt on. She turned to get a good look at her daughter, who was peacefully looking out of the window. Maya had Olivia’s curls but golden in color. The same wide eyes, but green. Maya was a quiet child, a baby who liked to think. Olivia laughed at that. She turned around and started the car. No matter what, there was nothing more important to her than her daughter.

  The father wasn’t important, at least not anymore. If Olivia could have her way, play her cards right, Maya would never have to meet her father, never have to face the disappointment. Hopefully, she wouldn’t feel his absence, either. Hopefully, Olivia would be able to provide for her, care for her well enough that Maya never grew up wishing she had a father.

  Olivia sighed as she drove. Maya was quiet as usual, watching the car whizz past the familiar neighborhoods. This wasn’t the life Olivia had imagined for herself. She had never thought she’d spend all her life in this town that had given her nothing. She had been all set for an internship as an Assistant Editor in New York, an opportunity which was even more lucrative than the one Sophie had been offered. They were both fresh out of college, ready to take on the world, ready to move to New York together and start a new life.

  Then Olivia had found out she was pregnant and everything had changed. She couldn’t afford to move to New York and raise a child all by herself. She couldn’t afford a baby on an intern’s measly salary. She had to stay behind, take care of her child and watch as everybody else made a life for themselves. That was three years ago, and nothing had changed for her since then.

  Chapter Two

  Olivia tried dressing up on Saturday to meet Sophie. She knew what the visit to Sophie’s parents’ house was going to entail: lazing by the pool in their bikinis and trying to get a tan while sipping cocktails.

  Sophie was nearly unrecognizable these days, at least from their time growing up together. She had her brother’s fair blonde hair, which fell in waves around her shoulders. When Sophie greeted her at the door, falling on her with a tight hug and several wet kisses on her face, she was already in a black bikini and had a breezy white sarong wrapped around her waist.

  “Get out of those clothes, Olivia. I already have a jug of mojito placed by the pool for us,” Sophie said with a laugh, as she led Olivia outside.

  Olivia smiled and started peeling off her well-thought out outfit for the day. It was only on the occasions that Sophie visited that Olivia had a chance to dress up these days. There were no other reasons to.

  She had dug out an old black and white polka dot bikini from her college days that she thankfully still fit into and had worn it under her clothes.

  “It’s hard to tell you’ve ever given birth,” Sophie said, watching Olivia undress.

  “You’re too kind,” Olivia said, as she lay down beside Sophie on the pool chair.

  Sophie handed her a pair of sunglasses which Olivia put on, smoothing her brown curls on top of her head. She’d taken great care to make her hair look good this day, as she didn’t want any untoward comments coming her way from Sophie about how she had “let herself go”.

  “So how’s the little brat, anyway?” Sophie asked as she faced up towards the sun. Olivia shut her eyes behind her sunglasses and bre
athed in. Sophie had never been one to develop any motherly feelings towards kids. Maya was no different. Sophie only tried to tolerate her because she was Olivia’s kid.

  “She’s well. Growing up faster than I can keep pace,” Olivia said, a smile creeping onto her face as she spoke about her daughter.

  “You should try looking for a job in New York. Your mom can take care of Maya, can’t she?” Sophie turned to her, and Olivia shook her head.

  “No. I can’t just leave my daughter behind here. I want her to grow up with me,” Olivia said, not looking at Sophie’s judgmental stare.

  “Oh, Olivia! You’re so old fashioned. You’d be more useful to Maya if you made more money. You’re no use moping around over here. She won’t ever see her mother happy.” Sophie reached for the glass of mojito she had placed next to her.

  “She’s happy with me. I’m happy here with her. You’ve got it wrong, Sophie,” Olivia said quietly, the familiar feeling of regret creeping up on her. She wasn’t on Sophie’s wavelength anymore. She should never have agreed to this meeting in the first place. Sophie wasn’t a mother yet, she’d never understand.

  “And what about Craig?” Sophie asked. Olivia’s brows creased.

  “Craig? What about him?” Olivia asked, still a little confused.

  “Isn’t he the father?” Sophie straightened up to look at her more clearly. Olivia threw her friend an irritated look.

  “What about him? I don’t talk to him anymore.” Olivia reached for her own mojito now. She wanted the conversation to end.

  “Hasn’t he like moved to California and tried to get into the film industry? He must be making some money. Can’t you ask him to help out?” Sophie was still looking into Olivia’s face as she sipped at her drink.

  “Drop it, Sophie. My mom and you seem to be after the same issue. I don’t want Craig to be involved in Maya’s life.” Olivia shut her eyes again, thankful for the sunglasses that could hide her anxious eyes.

  “I’m just saying that you shouldn’t be doing this by yourself,” Sophie added and sank back into the chair. Olivia didn’t respond to that.

  “When did you and Craig get together, anyway?” Sophie threw another round of questioning at her.

  “Sophie!” Olivia threw her a friend a look of disapproval.

  “I’m just asking. I had no idea it had happened. You only told me about it after you were pregnant with Maya.” Sophie wasn’t going to back down, it seemed. It was almost as if Olivia’s mother had set her up to the task.

  “I told you before, Sophie. It was a drunken night at Melissa Lasi’s house party. It’s not like we were in a relationship or anything,” Olivia said, sitting up in her chair now. “What’s with the interrogation anyway?”

  “I’m just curious. And a little worried for you. You’re not the same Olivia as before.” Sophie sighed as she said it, and drank some more of her cocktail.

  “You don’t have to worry about me. Of course I’m not the same, I have a child now. Things can never be the same. That doesn’t mean you have to feel sorry for me. Neither does it mean that I’m a completely changed person either.” Olivia sighed. She felt like all she did nowadays was console people around her and try and convince them that she was alright.

  The two of them were quiet for a while until the silence grew too long.

  “How are your parents? Are they home?” Olivia asked casually, hoping a change in conversation might clear the air a little.

  “They’re good. They’re not home right now. They went to the airport to collect Rufus. He’s coming home too, for my dad’s birthday tomorrow,” Sophie answered, as casually as Olivia had asked the question. Her words made Olivia sit up in her chair, though. Rufus was returning? Here? She wanted to scream, throw her hands in the air and disappear from this house…but Sophie could never know that. Olivia had kept her feelings for Rufus a complete secret.

  “Sister!” Rufus’ voice filled the air at that very moment and Olivia felt her stomach sink. All this was happening too quickly for her to know what to do.

  “Brother!” Sophie shrieked, jumping off her chair to run towards her older brother. Olivia tried to not look at the man hugging Sophie, but she couldn’t take her eyes off him. He was the man of her dreams.

  Rufus was in linen pants and a loose cotton shirt, opened wide at the neck. His shining blonde hair was longer than she remembered it being from college, which was the last time she had seen him in person. It was wavy and neatly tucked away behind his ears now. He was in sunglasses too, but she didn’t have to see them to know that his green eyes were sparkling in the sun.

  Sophie and Rufus hugged for a long time before she dragged him in Olivia’s direction.

  “And look who else is here,” Sophie said, leading her brother by the arm towards Olivia.

  She could feel her body shrinking, her cheeks flushing in agony. His eyes were on her now, and she was immediately conscious of her clothes, if she looked slender enough, if her hair was in place, if she should have put more makeup on.

  “Olivia,” Rufus said, matter-of-factly. His voice was at once warm and friendly. She tried to smile at him, sitting up in the chair, while he stood in front of her, looking down.

  He was as gorgeous as ever, if not more so. National stardom suited him. He was more sharply dressed now, his jaw looked more sharp and chiseled and he smelled great. Like the sea.

  “Hello, Rufus,” she said. It had been three years since she last laid eyes on him, but nothing had changed. She still felt the same about him.

  He stretched out a hand to her and Olivia gingerly grabbed it, and they shook. Since when did they shake hands?

  “Stop being such a celebrity, Rufus! Give her a hug.” Sophie rolled her eyes and sat down next to Olivia again.

  Rufus laughed, revealing his perfect set of white teeth. A long, deep dimple occupied his right cheek as he laughed and Olivia felt her knees buckling.

  “I don’t want to have to get up for this. How have you been?” Olivia asked, making herself say the words, though she didn’t know where they were coming from. It was as though her mind was working in two parts. One part was admiring him, going through all the memories of spending her childhood around him, being in love with him, like a film reel. The other part was trying to hold a conversation with him at the same time.

  “I’ve been well. How are you? Are you still in town? Did you move to New York?” Rufus asked, pushing his hands into the pockets of his pants.

  “Where have you been all this while, Rufus? Olivia is still in town. She never went to New York. She has a kid now.” Sophie was drinking her mojito again, looking from Olivia to her brother.

  Olivia thought she saw Rufus’ face change, perhaps in surprise. She cleared her throat and tried to lighten the mood again.

  “I’m sure Rufus has other things to worry about and discuss than local gossip.” Olivia forced a giggle and reached for her nearly empty glass of mojito again. She couldn’t take her eyes off him, though, just his presence was stunning enough. It wasn’t that hard to see why the whole nation was enthralled by him.

  “This isn’t just local gossip. You’re my best friend. We all grew up together. I thought I told you about it, Rufus.” Sophie looked like she was a little annoyed by her brother, like he had embarrassed her in front of company. Olivia smiled.

  “It’s really no big deal,” she said, turning to Rufus again. He had been standing still, looking at the two girls in turn.

  “You have a baby now?” Rufus repeated.

  “With Craig Walker of all people!” Sophie added, nudging Olivia with her elbow and then breaking into giggles.

  “Craig Walker? Isn’t he a model in California now?” Rufus asked, the look of surprise had turned to confusion on his face. He looked angry, surprised, confused, relieved…all at the same time. Olivia looked away from them, placing the empty glass on the table beside her.

  “Anyway, I’m sure Olivia doesn’t want to discuss it this way, Sophie. I’ll leave you gir
ls to it then. I need a shower,” Rufus said, smiling at Olivia politely.

  Olivia threw him a half-smile and settled back into her chair again, as did Sophie.

  Rufus walked away from them, rushing into the house now.

  “I can’t believe my brother is an actual celebrity,” Sophie said with a sigh after he had gone.

  “Are you seriously competing with your own brother now, Sophie?” Olivia hissed at her friend, shaking her head.

  “Not competing with him. Just stating that he is. It is quite marvelous, isn’t it? Who would have thought?” Sophie said, adjusting her back on the chair.

  “I did. He was always meant to be in the NFL. He was meant for all this fame,” Olivia said wistfully, back to daydreaming about him again.

  “You always did have a soft spot for him. Rufus can never do any wrong. Please tell me you didn’t have a crush on my brother,” Sophie said with a snort, and then laughed. Olivia joined in the laughter as well, hoping that would convince her friend that it was an absolutely silly suggestion to make.

  Chapter Three

  Olivia banged the door shut behind her and sank into bed. Maya had finally fallen asleep and she’d given their small apartment a thorough cleaning, and the weekend was the only time she had to get it done. She finally had some time to herself to think. What was she going to do now? Sophie was in town, Rufus was in town. And she was losing all control.

  She pressed the pillow down over her face and screamed into it to muffle the sound. This was not going as planned. She had been satisfied with her life until the day before. How could it all change in the matter of a few hours?

  She felt her phone beep and reached for it. It was a text from Sophie.

  Hope to see you here tomorrow at eight for dad’s birthday. Parents are excited to see you after years xx