B005N1TFVG EBOK

by Bruce Elliot Jones

  She was curled fetally on the passenger seat, head tucked, looking asleep. But she wasn’t. “Don’t tell me—no dogs allowed.”

  “I didn’t even ask. But there’s worse news. Alicia’s got them sharing a room.”

  Mitzi lifted her head.

  “A suite, actually. The biggest in the hotel. Very swank.”

  “Clancy agreed to this?”

  “She did according to the hotel’s computer.”

  Mitzi considered. “Huh.”

  I tapped nervously at the wheel. “I don’t like it.”

  “Don’t get paranoid. They’re here on business, first and foremost. Alicia’s exploring a deal for the new salon, not Clancy’s pants.”

  “It’s not her pants I’m worried about.”

  Mitzi made a dismissive snuff. “Alicia thinks Clancy’s a vampire, she wouldn’t fang another fanger.”

  “Unless she’s discovered the truth somehow.”

  Mitzi still appeared unfazed. “Clancy’s a sharp kid. Besides, she can read Alicia’s mind, remember? Putting her one step ahead of the dragon lady.”

  I puffed cheeks, blew out uncertain breath. “I still don’t like it. Why do they need to share a room unless Alicia intends to keep an eye on Clancy?”

  “Let’s worry about one thing at a time. What about our room?”

  “Got us one next to their suite.”

  “Ed! Good work! I’m impressed!”

  “Sheer luck. Question is, how do we get a dog in there?”

  She already had her paw on the door handle. “Not through the front lobby, for sure. Come on, there are always fire stairs somewhere in these places, it’s the law.”

  “Climb? That’s twenty-six floors!”

  She hopped from the car, grinning behind that muzzle? “You could stand to lose a pound or two…”

  * * *

  I opened the door, turned and checked the long, red-carpeted hall both ways for guests and maids, then whistled low. Mitzi darted from behind the fire door down the hall and came running.

  “Kind of small,” she noted, trotting into the room before me, “where are you going to sleep?”

  “You’re funny. A funny poodle.” I sighed, falling back with a whoosh on the single bed. “Get your sense of humor from Alicia’s side? Oh, man, that feels good.”

  Mitzi snuffed along the baseboard curiously. “That ancient crone hasn’t a humorous fang in her body. Terrific hearing, though. I’d keep my voice down if I were you. In fact, using only your mind from now on isn’t a bad idea.”

  I grunted exhaustion. “Haven’t perfected that.”

  “Better start, amigo, things could get rough around here real quick.”

  I didn’t like her tone. I sat up. “Meaning?”

  She was still down by the floor snuffing along the molding. “Not be an alarmist but it’s barely possible that someone has phoned Alicia from what’s left of good old Topeka, which could look like the burning of Atlanta by now. Or maybe she’s even seen it on the TV news...”

  I vaulted up. “You said Topeka’s town fathers have radio and TV covered!”

  “They probably do!”

  “Probably?”

  “Ed, please, chill out!”

  I grabbed the room’s remote and aimed it at the TV in the open doors of the entertainment hutch.

  “Keep it low,” Mitzi warned, still sniffing at the floor.

  I checked all the local KC news channels, even flipped over to CNN.

  “There’s nothing,” I breathed relief, “nothing but the usual national and local KC stuff.”

  When Mitzi didn’t answer I looked around for her. “What are you snorting at over there by the wall? You should have peed before we came up!”

  Her head lifted, black nose rising up the wall like a tiny Electrolux, sniffing, searching. “We have a small problem, Edward…”

  I came off the bed, crouched down beside her. “What?”

  “This fancy new hotel. It’s a sandblasted, refurbished old hotel…and there’s still lead lining in some of the wall studs.”

  “So?”

  “So I can’t Read Clancy’s thoughts next door. And she can’t Read ours. She doesn’t even know we’re here yet.”

  “You’ve tried to contact her mentally?”

  She nodded.

  “Damn. That’s not good.”

  “Not good at all. Lead tends to jamb the radar, y’know? She might get some light buzzing in her skull from us but she isn’t going to know what’s being said or even who’s saying it.”

  “So, if there’s trouble, there’s no way to warn her, or vice versa.” I slumped.

  Mitzi walked around the room, head lifted high, eyes darting.

  She glanced over at me. I was back on the bed, head in hands, rocking slowly.

  “Ed? What’s the matter?”

  My voice trembled. “No way to warn her…” I muttered.

  Then I looked up in panic. “What if news does eventually leak out of Topeka? What if Alicia sees it on their TV—sees it before Clancy does? What if she’s seen it already?”

  “Then having a panic attack now won’t help much, will it?”

  “Damn it, Mitzi!”

  I pushed off the bed quickly, raced for the door.

  “Where you going?”

  “Next door! I’m not sitting around here knowing Clancy might be--”

  Mitzi got to the door before me—way before me, like vapor materializing.

  “No! You won’t! You will go back and you will sit quietly on that bed and try to not totally screw this whole thing up! I didn’t risk getting torched and shot at and stealing a car and—“

  “—sucking on an innocent couple—“

  “—and dodging cops driving all the way up here to have your lovesick ass blow the whole deal at the last second! You want to get your girlfriend killed, Eddie, the quickest way is go banging at the suite next door!”

  She had a point.

  I turned away from the door, Mitzi still craning up at the ceiling, nose twitching.

  I sat back on the bed, head in my hands again. My temples hurt. My heart hurt.

  “Ed…?”

  “What!”

  “Take your head out of your hands a second.”

  I looked up at her.

  “That grill up there. Near the corner, see it?”

  “I see it.”

  “That’s the register to the air-conditioning vent. Heat vent in the winter. Behind it is an aluminum air duct that runs along above the ceilings of all the rooms on this floor—in our case, this room and the big suite next door.”

  “Connecting them. So?”

  She looked at me.

  “Are you suggesting we crawl through the air-conditioning duct to their room?”

  “Why not?”

  I put my head back in my hands. “You’ve seen too many Alien movies.”

  Mitzi ignored me, moved to the wall, stood on her hind legs, paws stretched upward on the wall. “If we can press an ear to that vent we might be able to pick up any conversation coming from the suite. And get an idea, at least, what’s going on over there.”

  I was already dragging the heavy dark oak desk over to the wall.

  Mitzi nosed aside the waste paper basket to clear my path. I got the desk aligned under the vent wall and—being the tallest—climbed up on it. The ceilings in the old hotel were high--I had to stand on my tip toes--but I got my head nearly level with the metal grill.

  I pressed close, listened a moment…finally looked down at Mitzi, shook my head. “Nothing.”

  “Not a sound?”

  “Not that I can hear. Maybe they’re not in.”

  “They’re in. I smelled them coming down the hall.”

  “You did? Did they both smell alive?” I asked anxiously.

  “Well, Clancy did, being the only live one of the two.”

  I heaved a sigh of relief.

  “Ed, pull the grill out. It might help you hear better.”

  I
appraised the rectangular plate. “It’s screwed on!”

  “Got any change?”

  I checked my pockets. “Two quarters and a dime.”

  “Try using the edge of the dime like a screw driver.”

  I began working at the screws. “Where do you learn this stuff?”

  “The Home Fixit Channel.”

  I got the screws out, put them in my pocket, began pulling at the grill.

  “As quietly as possible, please!”

  I finally levered it out. Looked down the dark length of aluminum duct work. A small square of light glowed softly from the duct floor about twenty yards down: Alicia’s suite.

  I placed my ear against the opening again, listened. Shook my head and looked down at Mitzi. “Still nothing. Damn.”

  “Your ears don’t have auditory acuity of mine.” She jumped up on the table. “Lift me up.”

  “You’re heavy!”

  “Keep your bloody voice down and lift me up!”

  I hoisted her into my arms and, back straining, got her snout level with the opening.

  “Well? This is breaking my spine!”

  “Be still!”

  “What is it?”

  “Voices…can’t make them out…”

  My legs began to tremble.

  “Listen, Ed, I think I can fit inside this duct...”

  “You’re mad! They’ll hear you!”

  “Alicia might, but she’ll think it’s just rats. Lift me higher, can you?”

  “Jesus.”

  “Don’t be a wuz!”

  “I’m a reporter, not a weightlifter!”

  I pushed, groaning misery.

  “Good. Little more. Okay, I’m in! Now, go sit in front of the TV.”

  “What for?”

  “Just do as I say, Eddie, life will be so much easier! And try to keep an open mind! Go!”

  And head low--stretched flat and long like a ferret—the poodle began inching her way down the narrow width of ductwork.

  I sat on the edge of the bed before the TV. Some Clark Gable movie was playing; TCM, probably. What the hell was I doing anyway?

  I heard the retreating scratching of Mitzi’s claws—prayed I was the only one that could hear them.

  On the TV Gable was wearing outdoor attire. He was cleaning a rifle inside what looked like a tent. That beautiful blonde actress with the great eyes stood behind him—what’s her name, fashion model, married a prince—Grace Kelly.

  “Tomorrow we’re going into gorilla country,” Gable was saying.

  “Isn’t that dangerous?” Princess Grace wanted to know.

  Above me Mitzi’s scratching grew faint.

  Gable looked up from his rifle and said something really weird: “The roof of this thing is scraping my ass!”

  Mitzi!

  “But I’m almost there! Can you hear me, Eddie?”

  “I hear you! You’re coming through Clark Gable.”

  “Loud and clear?”

  “Clear enough.”

  “Damn lead walls,” she muttered. “Okay, I’ve reached the grill over their suite. I can hear Alicia down there, pacing back and forth. She’s talking to someone, Clancy presumably, can’t see either of them.”

  “Can you use their TV? Get through to Clancy?”

  “Not unless one of them turns it on. Otherwise no frequency. And I can’t get to Clancy through this ceiling with just my mind. Must have lead in it, too. Some refurbishing job on this place!”

  On the TV Gable went back to cleaning his rifle.

  “It’s Mogombo,” Mitzi said. “MGM, 1953.”

  “Never mind the damn movie, what’s Alicia saying?”

  Silence for several seconds.

  “…okay…okay, I can see her now. She’s not talking to Clancy, she’s on her cell phone…”

  “Her phone? Talking to whom?”

  “Not sure. Someone out of town, I think.”

  “Not Topeka!”

  “I don’t think so. Alicia’s telling him she got the big suite here in KC ‘cause that’s where they’re meeting the two guys from Saunders and Associates.”

  “Who--?”

  “The company Alicia’s approaching to underwrite the new salon. She’s having dinner brought up to the suite tonight, for the four of them.”

  “Cozy. Ply them with cheese and wine. Seduce them into the best price, huh?”

  Silence.

  “Mitzi?”

  “Something like that, yes. Okay, I’m backing coming out now…watch for me!”

  I turned up the volume on the TV slightly. Cable and Kelly were kissing atop a waterfall now. “What do you mean, ‘something like that’?”

  “Get ready to catch me, Ed!”

  “What do you mean, ‘something like that?” I insisted.

  “Keep your voice down!”

  In a moment I saw her tail poke out of the vent.

  I got up on the desk and helped her out.

  I set her down gently on the desk, looked searchingly into her eyes. “Well?”

  Mitzi hopped to the floor, then up on the bed. She lay there quietly with her head between her paws.

  I got down from the desk and joined her. “What wrong? What did she say?”

  Mitzi looked up at me with soft, soulful eyes.

  “Don’t look at me like that!”

  “Apparently Alicia doesn’t think the company is going to meet her price. They’ve practically said as much already.”

  “Okay. So? That’s not terrible. She just lowers it, right?”

  Mitzi licked once at her muzzle thoughtfully. “It’s more complicated than that, Ed…”

  “All right. I’m listening.”

  “Sit down.”

  I sat. Heart knocking again.

  “I’m sitting.”

  Mitzi drew a deep breath. “As long as Alicia stayed in a small town like Topeka, she had a lot going for her. Mainly, time to grow, get her army built up to a certain point, perfect her strengths. When you’re three hundred years old, you’ve learned a lot about caution, pacing yourself, not taking foolish chances.”

  “Without the bird seed, huh Mitz?”

  She sighed. “The point is that small town atmosphere was a big part of her strength. The kind of strength she doesn’t have in a place the size of Kansas City. Not yet. There isn’t just the Missouri-side downtown here, you know, there’s also the Kansas City, Kansas side, and that whole Overland Park sprawl out south. More people. Which yes, is necessary for eventual growth, to give her army another toehold, build her cover into an empire. But in Topeka she was able to turn enough of the populace into vampires and still keep them close. To get the job done, you know?”

  “You’re talking about the salon.”

  “I’m talking about the catacombs below the salon. You can’t dig out a place like that unless you literally own the construction firm digging it. Because everyone in that firm must be trusted.”

  “Like the Mafia.”

  “Like the Mafia but not like the movie. None of that ‘Keep your friends close, but your enemies closer,’ jazz. To Alicia, anyone who is not a vampire is the enemy.”

  “I’m still sitting, still listening.”

  “The salon is worthless without the catacombs, its mud baths and the manufacturing facilities for the lotion. It’s the only way Alicia’s cult can spread out, town to town, city to city.”

  “Mitzi, I know all this—“

  “Those two guys coming over tonight. They’re not from the real estate firm like we thought. They’re from a small construction outfit over in North Kansas City.”

  I felt dryness form in my mouth. “Yeah--?”

  “They’re coming to dinner tonight as construction owners, Eddie. But they’re leaving as vampires. Get it?”

  An arrow went through my heart. “Alicia,” I whispered, voice breaking. “It’s not just a dinner. She’s going to fang them! And she expects Clancy to help with the job!”

  Mitzi put a paw on my leg. “Afraid so, Sp
ort.”

  I sat there staring into space. “Only Clancy isn’t a fanger…she’s human.”

  “So she tells us.”

  I jerked toward her. “You still don’t believe her?”

  She glanced over at the nightstand clock on the radio. “In about one hour and ten minutes it isn’t going to matter what I believe, Ed. For her sake, I hope she is a vampire. Otherwise—“

  “--she’s dead meat! Just like the guests! We’ve got to warn her, Mitzi!”

  The poodle didn’t even look at me, just nodded. “How?”

  EIGHTEEN

  “Well, we’ve got to do something!” I ranted, fist pummeling the duvet.

  Mitzi sighed. “Keep your voice down.”

  But I couldn’t stand sitting around any longer. I got up, started pacing.

  “This guy on the phone, what time did Alicia tell him these…construction characters to show up?”

  “Around eight, she said.”

  I ground my teeth, wore out the carpet. “Surely Alicia told Clancy about it! Clancy will make some excuse to her, then get the hell out there before the guys show up!”

  “What if Alicia hasn’t told her about the plan?”

  “Why wouldn’t she?”

  “To test her? See if she’ll come through at the last second? Maybe she doesn’t fully trust Clancy yet.”

  “Oh, Christ.” I bit my lip till I winced. “There has to be a way to warn her!”

  “I’m wide open to ideas, Sport.”

  I started pacing again. “Eight o’clock…eight o’clock…” I glanced at my watch. “It’s just past seven now. Their guests will arrive sometime before dinner if they have any manners at all…”

  “Which leaves us with little time and no plan.”

  “There’s always a plan,” I paced, kept repeating it over and over, “there’s always a plan…”

  I stopped short, snapped my fingers: an epiphany! “I got it! We call Alicia’s suite! Tell her it’s the front desk. Tell her somebody’s waiting in the lobby to see Clancy!”

  Mitzi looked unimpressed. “Like who?”

  “It doesn’t matter!”

  “It does if Alicia asks.”

  I threw up my hands. “Then we tell her the party didn’t give a name. But that it’s urgent he speaks with Clancy!”

  Mitzi gave me a dubious eye. “Yeah, that won’t sound suspicious.”