“It’s all his doing. Your love has quite the gambling problem and he owes your father and a few others…millions.”
“What?”
“Next time, he won’t just get roughed up.” She shrugs and then reaches out to squeeze my hand. I shiver again. “You know, this can all go away.”
“None of this makes sense to me. Elias is a good businessman and he does well, working with Luka.”
She snorts and shakes her head. “Turns out, you don’t know your precious Elias as well as you think you do.”
“I don’t believe you.”
“Go to this address…tonight.” She pulls a small card out of her purse and hands it to me. There’s an address and above that it just says Tito.
“What is this?” It’s not far from our estate.
She shrugs and the gesture makes me want to scream. She smiles her cunning close-lipped smile and walks away. “Call me when you’re ready to discuss.” She turns to me one more time. “Oh, and Mara? You make it so easy to make you look bad.” She pulls out a picture of me in bed with that stranger and my mouth drops open.
“What did you do?”
She shrugs. “It was child’s play. We can play a lot dirtier than that…maybe it’s time you start to realize just how dirty.”
I get in the car, trembling, and tell Kalvin the address. He turns around to look at me and I have to swallow down the hurt from the bomb my mother just dropped. I shelve it into the place of hurt stacked high from altercations with my parents, way down deep where it cannot truly touch me.
“Lady Mara? Are you okay?”
“Fine.” I take a shuddering breath.
I will be fine.
I will be.
I will.
“That’s no place for you.”
I frown at him. “What is it?”
He shakes his head. “It’s not safe.”
“Take me there now, please.”
He turns around but still looks at me from the rearview mirror. He starts driving us toward home and when he’s close, he takes a few different turns. The streetlights don’t exist here and I haven’t seen a house in a while. He makes one last turn and the headlights shine on a large warehouse and a crowded parking lot.
“Doesn’t look so bad.”
He grunts and comes around to open my door. “I’m going in with you,” he says.
“Not necessary.”
“Let’s hope you’re right.”
“I’m not used to you being so ominous, Kalvin. This place gives you the creeps?”
He stares straight ahead as we walk. “You could say that.” He looks at me once more before he opens the door to the entrance. “Sure you don’t want to just head home and call it a night?”
“Positive.”
The door opens before he can move and a couple rushes out. The woman looks intoxicated and the man is trying to lead her to the car. She starts gagging and he leads her to the bushes where she proceeds to empty her stomach.
Kalvin shoots me a look and I roll my eyes. “We’re going in.”
Even with all the cars in the lot, I’m still stunned by the number of people inside the building. And the noise is deafening as they cheer maniacally. I walk closer to see if I can figure out what they’re looking at, but I’m too short and it’s too crowded. I go around the side until I see an opening and squeeze through until I’m finally able to see.
There’s a ring and two men are fighting. They’re holding onto each other and I can only make out one of the man’s features. He’s bloody and gritting his teeth. The other guy’s head is under the first one’s arm and his arms are pummeling the guy’s stomach. He finally throws one that lands where it should and the first guy steps backward, freeing the guy that was hidden.
Elias.
I say his name out loud, but there’s a thunderous roar as he gets his footing back and proceeds to beat the other guy senseless. It’s hard to watch, but also exhilarating. If he were not doing this well, I don’t think I could take it. I duck between a few people and then keep going, until I’m standing right by the ring.
“It’s like there’s no escaping you.”
I turn to see who said those words and throw my head back to the ceiling.
Enough is enough!
Brienne is standing there, looking calm and collected as Elias gets hit. I can’t be bothered to respond to her when he’s getting slammed. I can’t even fully grasp the fact that she’s here with him, a part of this…this secret life of his that I knew nothing about. Elias quickly takes hold of the situation and lands a few right hooks to the other guy’s jaw and then another few to his stomach. When his last punch sends the guy reeling and he stays down, the crowd goes nuts.
“Does he make a lot of money from this?”
“Not enough, I don’t think. There’s always more to spend on…”
I turn to her then, my eyes narrowing. “Does he have a gambling problem?”
“I think so.”
I appreciate her honesty even though I’m the enemy. I wouldn’t offer that information up to me if I were her. I nearly tell her so, but I decide to keep my mouth shut instead, mulling over all of this new information.
As hard as I try, I can’t think of why Elias would owe my dad any money. I’m slowly accepting the fact that there are a lot of things I don’t know about my dad; my eyes are being forced open no matter how hard I try to squeeze them shut. A sick feeling in the pit of my stomach grows as Elias raises his hands in the air, triumphant.
He turns and walks toward us and when he sees me standing there, his face turns to stone. I have to give him credit—he doesn’t stop or turn the other way—he faces me head-on.
People crowd around him, congratulating him, and he grins, rubbing off some of his sweat with a towel. Every now and then, his eyes meet mine and I wish that I could read him better.
I should’ve tried to force more information out of my mother. When the crowd keeps getting in my way, I duck between people until we’re face to face.
“We need to talk.”
He nods, his lips pinched together. “I’d love to chat, but I’ve got a fight to watch.” He points behind me and I see Brienne stretching in the ring he was just in…what kind of circus is this?
Chapter Twenty-Three
Elias
Every imaginable curse word and then some goes through my mind when I see Mara in the warehouse. I should’ve known she’d find out, but I wish it could’ve been when I was on top of everything again. With this win and hopefully Brienne’s, I’ll be a little closer. I put a lot on Brienne’s fight. It still won’t be close enough though, even if Brienne wins, and it kills me that Mara might find out the truth.
“You need to get out of here,” I tell her. “It’s not safe for you here.”
“Kalvin is close.”
I look past her and see him for the first time, standing watch.
“He’s not enough. There are assholes here you don’t want to mess with—”
She holds up her hand. “When can we talk?”
I lean in closer. “Be careful, your mask is slipping. You almost seem like the girl I grew up with right now.” I both love and hate seeing the real her. It’s driven me out of my mind that for years now, Mara has put on a mask around everyone but me. “Wouldn’t want anyone to get the wrong idea and see that you’re actually a caring person.” I lower my voice. “I have nothing to say to you.”
The hurt flashes across her eyes but is gone within a blink. In my mind, I see her when she was ten, when she thought I was ignoring her for a week because my mother wouldn’t let me go play with the princess. She locked me in my room when I snuck out, not letting me out for so long I thought I’d die in that bedroom. Those were the dark days with my mother, the days I still try to stuff down inside. I’d give anything if I could erase them from my memory. The hurt on Mara’s face back then when I was able to go outside again but didn’t tell her where I’d been or what had happened…it’s the same look I sa
w just now.
It’s these snapshots of us in my mind that make me turn back to her, make me think maybe there is a way…maybe we could have a chance.
Then I think about getting fucked up in this place and I walk away from her, motioning for Kalvin.
“Get her out of here,” I yell at him.
He looks like he wants to hit me himself, but he goes and tries to talk some sense into her. At least he’s in closer proximity to her. I can tell by her mannerisms that she’s yelling at him, but it’s too loud in here to make any of it out. She gives me one more agonizing look that nails me to the ground, but then her shoulders sag in defeat. Nothing could surprise me more than when she says something to Kalvin and they leave. I thought I was in for more of a fight with her and it’s unsettling that she didn’t give it to me.
Satisfied that I haven’t seen any of the men who knocked me out the past two times I’ve been here, I go to Brienne.
She’s stretching when I reach her and so is her opponent. A couple of inches shorter than Brienne, what the woman lacks in height, she has in muscle. There’s a determined look in her eyes, she looks menacing enough that I start to sweat. I haven’t seen this woman fight before, and I should’ve before putting all of my money on Brienne.
It’s hard to get Mara off of my mind. What does she know? How does she know? My life has become so convoluted that I don’t know where I’d even begin. Brienne looks my way and I give her an encouraging smile. She looks relieved to see me standing here and looks past me, probably trying to see if Mara stayed for her fight.
The fight starts out to Brienne’s advantage. She goes in strong and gets in a few good hits. But somewhere along the way, the other woman gets scrappy and I cringe with how hard Brienne gets hit. She’s all in though, jumping right back into the heat. They’re going head to head, and the adrenaline is pumping. Sweat creeps down my back and I wipe my neck with the towel I’m still carrying.
I feel like such an asshole that any part of me cares about winning when all I should care about is how badly Brienne gets hurt. I console myself with the fact that she seems just as into it as I am when I’m out there.
There’s a loud crack and it happened so fast I didn’t see who delivered it, but Brienne goes down. I rush forward, getting as close as I can without being yelled at by the ref, and exhale a shaky breath when she gets back up. She has a renewed fire about her; even though I can tell she’s slowing down, her eyes are determined. She goes after the woman, not stopping her punches until the right one lands.
Down the opponent falls and a mighty roar echoes off the walls. Brienne is declared the winner and she smiles at me with glee. I love seeing her smile like that. She’s so serious most of the time.
“You did it!” I yell.
She waves her fist in the air and laughs.
When she comes out of the ring, I back away so everyone can congratulate her and she seems to be in her element. I wonder if she hates being a guard to the queen, giving up her life to serve someone else. It’s basically what I do—well, maybe if I would just focus on that and all my extracurriculars, I’d be better off. I stare at her with new respect. She carries devotion so well, with dignity and a regalness all her own.
She steps out of the crowd and I hug her, despite her protests.
“A little sweat won’t hurt—I’m still gross myself.” I laugh, wrapping my arms around her waist.
“Are you saying I’m gross?” She grins, her arms winding around my neck. She leans up and kisses me softly.
I’m so surprised, I smile against her mouth and pull away, putting a stop to the kiss. “Someone’s feeling the winner’s high.”
She throws her head back and laughs and I stare at her, wondering where this woman has come from…it’s like she’s gained all the confidence in the world practically overnight.
“Congratulations. You deserved that win.”
“Let’s go settle up with Tito,” she says.
I nod. I’m embarrassed to say how much I’m thinking about settling up with Tito. We walk to the counter and he’s not in his usual place. He was here earlier, so I look around, ignoring the man who stands in his place.
“Where’s Tito?”
“He’s gone for the night.”
I frown. “He never leaves early.”
The man shrugs. “He did tonight.”
I don’t like this. I look at Brienne and she’s staring at me worriedly.
“We’re here to settle up. We both won our fights, and I put money on this one here.” I grin at Brienne, hoping to calm her, but she looks around the room, assessing. As soon as I get her out of here, I want to find out what she’s thinking.
“You’ll have to come back when Tito’s here.”
“No, we get paid on the night we play—that’s how it works around here.”
The guy shakes his head slowly and his lips poke out in an exaggerated pout. “Not tonight.”
I step closer and slam my hand on the counter, making it rattle. “You tell Tito he needs to settle up with me before the night is over.”
Smirking, the guy leans into my face. “You can tell him yourself when you come back tomorrow.”
I let out a string of profanity so long that Brienne starts giggling. I turn to her, still raging, and she covers her mouth with her fist. I take in her bruises and the drips of blood on her forehead and cheek. It calms me down to see her humor in the situation even though I’m bloody furious.
I take a deep breath and turn to glare at the guy one more time before I walk away. I’ll be contacting Tito tonight, here or not. I tug my shirt away from my body.
“I should go home and get a shower. I’m not hanging around here longer than I have to. I’ll get your money, don’t worry.”
“I wasn’t worried. That money is for you. I don’t want it.”
I stare at her incredulously and she just stands there staring back at me.
“I’m not taking your money.” I shake my head and put my towel over my shoulder. I motion for her to follow me and we walk toward the door. I look cautiously outside as we step out, hoping to God I’m not caught off guard again.
“You’re the one who told me I should do this. I love it. I’m good at it. I have you to thank for it. I don’t need the money. I have everything I need at the estate. And I think maybe you need it more than I do.”
I feel my face heat, embarrassment rising across my cheeks and chest.
“I’m not taking your money,” I say gruffly. “But thank you. You’re maybe the sweetest person I’ve ever met.”
“Too bad you don’t really want sweet, right?”
“Oh, I want sweet…I want sweet more than I can tell you.”
She laughs softly and pats my shoulder. “You need to stop lying to yourself.”
She walks off before I can stop her, with me still thinking about what she said.
“Hey,” I yell before she gets in her car, “I’ll let you know when I hear from Tito.”
She just waves and pulls away, leaving me alone with the truth.
She’s right. Mara is in my blood. I’ll die loving her whether I want to or not. It’s been a long time since I’ve thought of her as sweet, but when her body was beneath mine as I wrung every ounce of pleasure out of her, she was the sweetest perfection I’ve ever witnessed in my entire life.
* * *
I try to call Tito at least six times and it goes to voicemail every time. I leave two messages and the last one has a few choice words. Toward the end of my message, I manage to pull out a little decency.
“I hope you’re okay. It’s not like you to do business this way. If you’re gone, you still pay your dues. So let me know what’s up. With all the craziness at the warehouse, I need to know you’re all right.”
I take a shower and when I get out, there’s a text from Mara. I open it up, already nervous about what it will say.
Mara: You’re not getting out of talking to me.
Shit.
I can’t
see her tonight…not feeling the way I do.
My hands crave her too much.
Chapter Twenty-Four
Mara
I’m waiting for Elias when he shows up at the house the next morning to meet with Luka. I answer the door, bouncing from all the caffeine I’ve ingested. His jaw ticks when he sees me and I lean against the doorway, holding out my hand for him to enter.
“How long have you been getting beaten to a pulp?”
He frowns. “I’ve only lost one time and you saw me afterward—I was fine.”
“What kind of trouble are you in?”
He leans forward and I can smell his peppermint breath. “It’s not your concern.”
“Oh, but it is. You became my concern years ago when you became the best friend I’ve ever had. I’m sorry if you’ve forgotten that, but I haven’t!” I spit the words at him and his eyes soften. “Now. Tell me…what can I do to help?”
He runs his finger across my cheek and my bones feel like candle wax oozing into a flame.
“I’ve got it covered, Mara. Okay?” His hand drops and he’s all business again. “I have a meeting to get to.”
* * *
Benswei Den Grauten’s house is an elaborate sandstone overlooking the bluffs in Powan, a town rich with history about fifteen minutes south. It doesn’t take long to get there—I take the off-roads, trying to avoid traffic, and arrive mid-morning.
I’m impressed by the grounds. Den Grauten’s house is not even a third of the size of ours and neither are his gardens, but what he has, he’s made the best use of, that’s for sure. Not a stray branch or weed in sight. Also, not a person or car in sight.
I hope my mother hasn’t already left for the day and check the time again. No, it’s still a bit early for her to go anywhere. My arrival time was intentional.
I ring the doorbell and it takes a second ring before anyone answers. A stern-looking woman answers the door and looks right through me. If she recognizes me, she doesn’t give one ounce of reaction.
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