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Complete Works of L. Frank Baum

Page 883

by L. Frank Baum

Scarecrow

  What do you do that for?

  Dorothy

  Because I’m hungry. Don’t you ever eat?

  Scarecrow

  No. I’m stuffed full now. Pretty soon

  you’ll be stuffed full and you won’t be

  able to eat either.

  Dorothy

  I eat three or four times a day.

  Scarecrow

  Is it necessary?

  Dorothy

  Of course.

  Scarecrow

  How I pity you. You people of flesh must

  waste a lot of time trying to keep alive.

  Dorothy

  Haven’t you any taste?

  Scarecrow

  I admire you.

  Dorothy

  You’re a strange creature. That farmer

  might have taken more pains in your

  manufacture in more ways than one.

  Scarecrow

  Yes. Think of his starting me in life with

  so few advantages.

  (A groan heard back of drop.)

  Dorothy

  What’s that?

  Scarecrow

  It sounds like a carette horse passing a

  stable at dinner time.

  Dorothy

  It comes from behind these bushes. Dare

  you look and see what it is?

  Scarecrow

  I fear nothing, but a lighted match, or a

  cigarette smoker. If ever I bump up

  against either of those two -- peace to my

  ashes.

  (Pushes bushes aside.)

  I’ve got it.

  (Brings Tin-man out.)

  (Tin-man stands, rigid, with fife in

  position for playing.)

  Dorothy

  Is that a man, or a hardware store?

  Scarecrow

  He’s been married tin years and this is his

  tin wedding.

  Dorothy

  Did you play, sir?

  Tin-man

  Did I play? I’ve been practicing that

  lovely tune for over a year.

  Dorothy

  Why do you stand so still?

  Tin-man

  I’m rusted.

  Dorothy

  Where?

  Tin-man

  In my joints.

  Dorothy

  Must you stay there forever?

  Tin-man

  Not if you will help me. Get the oil can

  from behind that stump and oil me up a

  bit and then I’ll be oil right.

  Scarecrow

  I’ll rush the can.

  (Gets oil can from behind out drop and

  begins to oil Tin-man’s joints. Bus. ad

  lib.)

  Tin-man

  What a blessed relief. Accept my thanks.

  Nick Chopper is at last himself again.

  Dorothy

  I’m so glad we heard you. What a

  dangerous position you were in.

  Tin-man

  Wasn’t I? If a hold-up man had come

  along with a can opener he might have

  gone through me with ease.

  (To Scarecrow)

  Here, oil my neck a little more. It doesn’t

  turn smoothly.

  Scarecrow

  (Oiling Nick’s neck.)

  Some of these tough joints ought to be

  pulled.

  Tin-man

  (To Dorothy)

  Your friend seems to be one of the light

  fingered gentry. I hope he’s not as bad as

  he’s painted.

  Dorothy

  What a horrid thing for you to say, after

  his helping you out of your trouble.

  Tin-man

  I beg your pardon, Miss; it’s a long time

  since I’ve been in polite society and I’m

  still a bit rusty.

  (To Scarecrow)

  Much obliged for the grease. Ah, I was

  not always made of tin. Once I was made

  of flesh and blood, as you two are.

  Scarecrow

  (Taking handful of straw from breast.)

  Cut me out, please.

  Dorothy

  How did it happen.

  Tin-man

  A pretty Munchkin girl loved me

  devotedly. Often she came and held the

  trees while I chopped them down, and

  then gently lowered them to the ground.

  But the wicked witch had forbidden any

  love-making in her domains, and one day

  Cynthia and I were caught holding hands.

  She enchanted my axe so that it slipped

  and cut off my leg. I went to the tinsmith

  and had a new one made. Then, one by

  one, I lost my arms, head, and body, but

  the tinsmith replaced each missing

  member. I kept on chopping wood,

  though, and said nothing. I was happy,

  notwithstanding, until I discovered that I

  no longer loved Cynthia.

  Dorothy

  No longer loved her? Why?

  Tin-man

  The tinsmith had forgotten to give me a

  heart.

  Scarecrow

  That probably came extra.

  Dorothy

  Come along with us to Oz, perhaps you

  can get a heart.

  Tin-man

  Who is Oz - a butcher?

  Dorothy

  No, no! It’s city, where a wonderful

  wizard rules.

  Tin-man

  (Sings, dancing to time.)

  “Oh, Cynthia, Cynthia, I’ve been thinking

  -

  What an awful thing it was -

  To be without a heart, but now

  I’ll get it from the Wizard of Oz.”

  (Break and bus. Scarecrow.)

  -- “

  WHEN YOU LOVE, LOVE,

  LOVE.” --

  Trio -- Tin-man, Dorothy, and Scarecrow,

  and exit.)

  Oh! Love’s the thing, that poets sing

  Their sweetest lays regarding.

  And none say nay, to love’s gay sway

  Which wounds when not rewarding.

  Naught can allure the heart so sure

  As one swift dart from Cupid

  And none, I know would dodge his blow,

  Unless exceeding stupid.

  For love’s the thing, that poet’s sing

  Their sweetest lays regarding,

  And all are gay, neath Cupid’s sway

  All worldly cares discarding.

  Chorus

  When you love, love, love in mad

  delirium,

  When you love, love, love is quite sincere

  you come.

  there is nothing so divine there is nothing

  half so fine,

  As the gladness of your madness when

  you love, love, love.

  II.

  I’ve heard it said that Love is fed

  On gifts of costly treasure,

  But it’s so nice, I’m sure the price,

  No lover cares to measure.

  All other things are quite forgot

  When once your heart is captured

  You guess if you’re alive or not

  So madly you’re enraptured.

  But though of love you gaily sing

  ‘Twill turn your heart quite stony,

  To end the whirl and find the girl

  Is seeking “Alimony.”

  - CHANGE TO -SCENE IV-

  SCENE:- The Poppy Field. The scene

  shows an extensive field of poppies, 30 or

  40 young ladies dressed in costumes

  representing the poppy flower. They are

  so arranged that they practically fill the

  entire stage. Stage in total darkness at the

  beginning of this scene. Light effect
is

  thrown upon the gauze drop. Gradually

  the lights are raised on the stage

  beginning red and gradually working up

  to a pale white light. All the girls stand

  with their heads bent forward so as to

  hide faces, their poppy heads alone

  showing. As they sing they sway their

  bodies and pantomine with their heads.

  (Chorus of Poppy flowers.)

  POPPY CHORUS.

  Should a wandering mortal lucklessly

  appear in our field

  Needlessly our sweet perfume inhaling

  Each sense with joy regaling

  Who can blame us if all our soporific

  powers are revealed.

  While unto our sway he gives way

  And must helplessly yield.

  For Death, like a breath comes to all soon

  or late

  And mortals are the sport of a

  mischevious fate.

  So welcome the peace that we bring to

  mankind.

  It is happiness to dream on, with care left

  behind.

  We are poppies in fairest splendour,

  blooming fragrant alway.

  Through the mosses and the grasses

  looming

  Fascinations rare assuming

  We delight when alone, to pass the

  moments are play

  Every petal graciously nods

  Our many charms to display.

  (After Chorus, DASHEMOFF enters,

  hurriedly R.I.)

  Dash.

  Oh, Dorothy! Dorothy!

  Dorothy

  Here I am. I’m so glad to meet you again.

  I’ve lost my way.

  Dash.

  These poppy fields are pathless.

  Dorothy

  The Tin-man punctured himself with a

  rusty nail, and I had to send for a plumber

  to solder up his wound.

  Dash.

  The Tin-man?

  Dorothy

  A new friend of mine.

  Dash.

  I found a rhyme for “Sarsaparilla”, but

  now I can’t find the king.

  (Enter PASTORIA, TRYXIE, COW and

  LION at back. Pastoria is dressed as a

  lion tamer, Tryxie as a bareback rider.

  Pastoria leads the Lion, Tryxie leads the

  Cow.)

  Pastoria

  (Coming down.)

  S-sh! the Wizard’s police are after us and

  we are disguised as a one ring circus.

  Dash.

  (To Dorothy)

  This is Pastoria II, the rightful king of

  Oz.

  Tryxie

  I am Signiorina Bouncerino, premiere

  equestrienne.

  Pastoria

  And I am Signor Gonzabo, premier lion

  tamer.

  (Striking pose with Lion.)

  Sit up, Bruno, Kiss your paw.

  (Bus. lion.)

  No, no! Kiss your paw to the ladies.

  (Bus. lion.)

  But come, we must not tarry here. On to

  the Emerald City.

  (Xes R. Poppies shake their heads. All

  characters yawn.)

  Dorothy

  (To Dash.)

  Are you sleepy?

  Dash.

  Very. It’s the perfume of these flowers.

  Dorothy

  (Yawning)

  Yes; they make opium of them, I’ve read.

  (Poppies shake their heads.)

  Pastoria

  I feel like forty winks and a couple of

  naps.

  (Cow lies down.)

  Tryxie

  (Yawning)

  Not a bad idea. I think I’ll use you as a

  sofa pillow. You’re not much as a

  mattress, but you’d make an awful hit

  with me, served rare, with mashed

  potatoes.

  (Lies down L. with head on Cow’s side.)

  Pastoria

  (Sleepily.)

  Bruno, kindly give me an imitation of a

  folding bed.

  (Lion lies down.)

  Will somebody bring me my shaving

  water and a poached egg some time next

  week?

  (Lies with head on Lion. Falls asleep.

  Poppies shake their heads.)

  Dorothy

  (Drowsily)

  What does this mean? My head reels. My

  eyes must close. The perfume stifles me.

  There’s danger in this sleep I’m sure.

  (Falls asleep.)

  (Dashemoff retires up stage.) (Scarecrow

  and Tin-man enter from platform at

  back.)

  Tin-man

  Where are you, Hay?

  Scarecrow

  (Coming down.)

  Did the plumber fix you up all right?

  Tin-man

  Oh, yes. I’m now a soldered, but wiser

  man.

  Scarecrow

  Hello! I’m wounded too.

  (Shows tear in leg.)

  Got a few pins?

  Tin-man

  What for?

  Scarecrow

  (Pointing to tear)

  I want to collect my rent.

  (Poppies shake heads.)

  (All on stage yawn.)

  Tin-man

  (Looking around.)

  Asleep - all of them.

  Scarecrow

  Let’s wake them up.

  Tin-man

  You can’t. Before I turned to tin I didn’t

  dare to cross these fields.

  (Poppies shake.)

  Their perfume brings an endless sleep.

  Scarecrow

  I don’t feel sleepy.

  Tin-man

  Of course not. It’s the brains that go to

  sleep, and you haven’t got any.

  Scarecrow

  But we can’t leave little Dottie here.

  Tin-man

  How can we wake her.

  Scarecrow

  I don’t know, but we must.

  Tin-man

  Suppose we shake her?

  Scarecrow

  No; it isn’t polite to shake a lady.

  (All characters asleep snore.)

  Tin-man

  What will we do?

  Scarecrow

  I think she has a ring that will bring one

  of our leading witches to her aid.

  Tin-man

  (Taking her hand.)

  Here it is.

  Scarecrow

  But we don’t know how it works.

  Tin-man

  Who can tell us?

  Dorothy

  (In sleep.)

  Oh, Locusta!

  (WITCH of the North enters L.3. coming

  to Dorothy.)

  Witch

  Who calls me!

  (Sees Dorothy)

  The child to whom I promised my

  friendship. She and her companions in

  the deadly grasp of these treacherous

  blossoms. Heartless and poisonous

  flowers, dare you defy the power of the

  Witch of the North

  (Poppies raise their heads.)

  Defy me, who rules the North Wind and

  holds the Frost King as a willing subject?

  for this you shall die. For this shall I

  cloud the sunshine, which is your breath,

  and chill the warmth which gives you

  life.

  (Poppies raise heads.)

  Hail, winds of the frozen North! Come to

  my aid! Embrace these false blossoms,

  and wither them with your cold caresses!

  King of the Fronst, you do I invoke in

  this, my hour of vengeance. Hurl your

  glittering atoms upon these cruel flowers

&nb
sp; --

  (Poppies kneel.)

  Congeal their sap of life, and set upon

  them the icy seal of your freezing kiss,

  which kills as surely as does their own

  treacherous breath. Thus shall my

  enemies perish! Thus shall I restore to

  life these mortals who now sleep, and

  rescue the maiden I have sworn to

  protect!

  (Poppies shrink away, droop and fall to the ground, as the snow descends and the scene change to Scene 5: Winter Scene. [HANDWRITTEN: The dimmer effect (elective) is worked on gauge, hung behind proscenium. Lights are lowered and when out scene changes to Poppy Field in Winter.] Several snow boys and girls discovered at the back of platform. Snow Queen on high platform C. holding her hands out towards the audience. Snow falls from her hands. Characters are posed R. and L. with Dorothy in C. of stage. When lights have worked up to a light blue she slowly rises, turns and sees the Snow Queen and drops on her knee.

  Curtain

  ACT II

  SCENE:- House and Stage all dark. THE PHANTOM MARCH. Change to Throne

  Scene. CHORUS discovered, THE WIZARD OF OZ enters C.

  Bardo

  All hail to the wonderful Wizard of Oz.

  (All salaam.)

  Wizard

  (to Crowd)

  Friends, an attempt has been made to

  assassinate your King. As I was about to

  enter the Emerald City a pistol shot was

  fired and struck me in the chest. After this

  I must have a protector.

  (To Bardo)

  Have we a good chest protector?

  Sir Wiley Gyle

  (Pointing to Guard L.)

  Here’s a good man.

  Wizard

  (To Guard)

  This way, if you please.

  (Guard approaches)

  What is your business?

  Guard

  To watch.

  Wizard

  Antyhing else?

  Guard

  To guard.

  Wizard

  Then you are a watch-guard?

  Guard

  I am.

  Wizard

  You are? Good. How much?

  Guard

  How much what, sire?

  Wizard

  To protect.

  Guard

  Three dollars a week.

  Wizard

  I can get a man with whiskers for four.

  Guard

  But think, sire, I would protect you

  against an army. Aye, a thousand. Aye,

  ten thousand! If they came upon us I

  would run my sword through them, one

  by one.

  (Suiting action to word)

  Wizard

  Good boy! And if it came to a

  show-down I’d help you run.

  (Goes to throne - to crowd)

  Friends, I’ll begin my performance with

  the magic egg and handkerchief trick.

  Gyle

  (Aside to others)

  Watch!

  Wizard

  (Bus)

  I have here a tame egg and a fresh laid

  handkerchief. Now what I propose to do

  is to place the egg within the

  handkerchief and have it disappear, and

  re-appear in the mouth of some innocent

  spectator.

  Gyle

  Bah!

  Wizard

 

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