Daniel and Daughter

by Lucy Gordon

  'No,' Lee said firmly. 'You couldn't hurt him like that.'

  'For his sake, I've got to show everyone that I can get to Oxford, and then get out of going.' She gave a little laugh and scratched her head in a manner that was uncannily reminiscent of her father. 'It's as simple as that,' she said ironically.

  While Lee reloaded her camera Phoebe began to study the pictures on the walls. Some of them were Lee's best shots, including some covers for Harpers. Others were agency posters. Every model agency distributed large posters covered with tiny pictures of their clients, with details of size and colouring. Like all fashion photographers, Lee hung these up where she could refer to them quickly.

  Phoebe stepped in front of a poster from Mulroy & Collitt and peered closely at one of the pictures. The caption underneath read 'Roxanne, 5' 8". Blonde, green eyes'.

  'That's the model I talked to the first day, isn't it?' she asked Lee, who'd come up behind her.

  'That's right,' Lee said. 'She's one of the best.' Huge rolls of coloured paper were strung up between posts to provide a variety of backgrounds. Lee pulled the gold paper down until it touched the floor. Phoebe was clad in the white dress she'd worn to the college ball, decorated with gilt jewellery. The be] was a gilt chain, bracelets jangled on her wrists, an‹ her ears sported earrings so long that only someone with Phoebe's swan-like neck would have dared to wear them. Against the gold background, in the white dress, with her pale skin and flaming red hair, she was a gorgeous study in contrasts.

  When she'd finished, Lee said, 'Phoebe, I want you to put on the jeans and shirt you were wearing when you came in. Scrub all the make-up off your face and do your hair in bunches.'

  'Bunches? You mean like a little kid?' Phoebe demanded in horror.

  'Trust me. I know what I'm doing.'

  When Phoebe had changed, Lee set her against a green background and pointed the camera at her. A cheeky urchin laughed back, so different from the previous shot that it seemed impossible it could be the same person. Lee gave a sigh of pure professional pleasure.

  When the session was finished Phoebe changed back into her ordinary clothes and followed Lee into the cubbyhole.

  'Do you think they're going to be good, Lee?' she asked eagerly.

  'Yes,' Lee said guardedly. 'I think they are.'

  'Good enough for me to be a model?'

  "That's, not a fair question,' she prevaricated.

  'Why? Because you've promised my father that you won't encourage me?' Phoebe asked with disconcerting shrewdness.

  'Well, you know how he feels.'

  'That's Dad's trouble,' Phoebe said severely. 'He will cloud the issue with personal feelings when I'm talking about facts. Either I'm good enough to be a professional model or I'm not. Feelings don't come into it. If I'm hopelessly bad I wouldn't expect you to keep quiet about that because it might hurt my feelings.'

  Lee was privately so much in agreement with this that she was left floundering in silent despair for an answer.

  'So please tell me,' Phoebe went on. 'Am I hopelessly bad?'

  'No,' Lee admitted reluctantly. 'You're not.'

  Phoebe watched Lee's face for a moment before moving in for the kill. 'Am I good?'

  'You know you are.'

  'How good?'

  I'll have to see the pictures before I can be sure of that.'

  'But you've got a pretty clear idea already, haven't you? If I said I was determined to become a model, would you say I was raving mad?'

  Lee ran a hand distractedly through her hair. She'd expected questions, but not this cunningly phrased interrogation. 'No, I wouldn't say that,' she said at last. 'But I would say you ought to listen to your father. He knows the world better than you do.'

  'Not the fashion world, he doesn't. You're the expert there. That's why I'm asking you.'

  'But he's your father and you're very young.'

  'I'm at the age when people normally start thinking about their careers,' Phoebe said reasonably. 'If I said I wanted to go to Oxford I don't suppose either of you would say I was too young to make that decision would you?'

  'I suppose there's something in that,' Lee admitted, frowning. 'I do think you're entitled to rather more say in your own future than he seems to be giving you.'

  'Lee, please tell me honestly. Do I have the talent to be a model?'

  Lee sighed and gave up. She'd warned Daniel that if this moment came she would have to tell Phoebe the truth.

  'Yes, you do,' she said. 'You look fabulous and you're terribly photogenic. But it's an insecure life and a very hard one. You could get ill and your looks could vanish overnight. You could wear yourself out banging on doors trying to get a start.'

  'But you could employ me-'

  'Oh, no, I couldn't,' Lee said hastily, shuddering at the thought of Daniel's reaction to this plan. 'Not while your father's against it.'

  'But if it weren't for Dad you'd employ me, wouldn't you?'

  'I didn't say that. There could be all sorts of reasons for my not using you. You might not be suitable for any of the things I'm booked to do. You were the one who wanted to keep it impersonal. You're not suggesting that I should show you favouritism, are you?'

  'Of course not. But I don't want to be discriminated against either,' Phoebe pleaded. 'If I'm not right for a particular job, fair enough. But you've got me on a blacklist all because of Dad. That's not only unjust, it's restraint of trade.'

  'Pardon?' Lee said blankly.

  'Restraint of trade. It's a legal concept. It's against the law for anyone to do something that interferes with another person's freedom to earn their living. The fact is, if it weren't for Dad, you'd hire me sometimes, wouldn't you?'

  'I think I'd better not answer that,' Lee said, feeling the waters beginning to close over her head.

  'That's all right,' Phoebe said wickedly. 'Some people take silence to mean consent.'

  'Phoebe, why don't you just become a lawyer?' Lee pleaded. 'I'm beginning to think it's exactly what you're cut out for.'

  Phoebe laughed-the young, confident laugh of someone who knew she could make the world dance to her tune.

  That's what Dad says,' she said serenely. 'But I know what's right for me and I'm going to have it, no matter what he thinks. Thanks a million, Lee.'

  When she'd gone the studio seemed quiet, as though a whirlwind had hit it and passed on.

  'Were you ever that young and that sure?' mused Gillian.

  'Yes,' Lee said. 'And it was a disaster. But then, I wasn't a genius.'

  CHAPTER FIVE

  Lee had no leisure to think of Phoebe for the next few days. Sonya was leaving to spend part of her summer holidays with Jimmy, and Lee's time was taken up with supervising her preparations. Mother and daughter enjoyed a final shopping trip together, during which Lee splashed out on a new dress for herself. When they got home she paraded in it before the mirror. It was blue silk, highlighting her eyes, and cut so that it clung to her dainty figure.

  She commended herself for choosing something so classically restrained, until Sonya blew this self-deception apart with the frank comment, 'Jolly good, Mum! It's about time you bought something sexy.'

  'Don't be vulgar, darling! It's elegant and simple.'

  'Of course it is. Elegant, simple and sexy.'

  'Sonya!'

  Sonya placed her hands theatrically over her mouth. Lee surveyed the gown in dismay, seeing the truth at last. It was sexy. It was the most frankly provocative garment she'd ever worn with Daniel.

  Sonya's train left at midday. Lee drove her to the station and they sat over a cup of coffee. As always on these occasions Lee's stomach was churning with conflicting feelings. She was determined never to interfere with Sonya's love for her father, but the sight of her going off to visit Jimmy roused painful sen-sations. Now she was uncomfortably aware that she was babbling.

  'I don't know how you manage to fit in so many activities, darling. After you've seen your father you're going on that school camp-that's the twen
ty-third, don't forget-and then you'll…'

  'Mum…' Sonya briefly laid her hand over Lee's, and her eyes were kind. 'I'm coming back, I promise,' she said gently.

  Lee let out her breath, her heart thumping. 'I'm really transparent, aren't I?' she asked shakily. '

  'Well, whenever I go off to see Daddy you remind me of all the things I'm booked to do when I get back. I'd have to be a lot stupider than I am not to guess why.'

  'And you're not stupid,' Lee said with a little smile.

  'I wish you'd stop worrying. I love Daddy, but I wouldn't want to live with him. His latest fad is to want me to call him Jimmy,' she added wryly.

  'What? Why?'

  'For the same reason he's started wearing trendy clothes and pulling his stomach in. He's nearly forty and he hates it. It drives Erica mad.' Erica was Jimmy's second wife.

  Sonya's wisdom had made her seem mature, but suddenly she changed, becoming again a thirteen-year-old girl, gleefully winding her mother up.

  'I tell you what, Mum,' she said with elaborate casualness, 'I won't go after all. I'll stay here and you and I will spend this next week together having a wonderful time-just the two of us.'

  Lee gasped with dismay before she could stop herself. Meeting her daughter's eyes, she found them brimming with fun. Of course, Sonya knew Lee was planning to see a lot of Daniel. No one had told her but she knew.

  'I think it's time you got on the train,' she said firmly.

  'But shouldn't I stay here and keep you company-?'

  'Get on the train, Sonya.'

  'I just hate to think of your being all alone-'

  'Get on the train before I take you by the scruff of the neck and put you on.' She joined in Sonya's laughter. 'I'm not going to pass up the chance of getting rid of you for a week,' she said. 'It's your father's turn to suffer.'

  At the train door they hugged each other vigorously. 'Be good,' Sonya said, and hopped on board before Lee could protest.

  Daniel had been out of town for a few days, but they were to see each other that evening. Lee prepared with great care, putting on the beautiful dress, then taking it off, and finally putting it on again. At last she spoke to herself firmly. It was time to stop being nonsensical. She was a grown woman and she'd made up her mind, finally, definitely, once and for all. At least-she thought she had.

  Daniel pulled open the door as she ran up the steps of his house, and no sooner had it shut behind her than she was in his arms being hungrily kissed in a way that made her head spin.

  'I haven't kissed you for a hundred years,' he murmured when they paused for breath. 'Has it occurred to you that this is the first time we'd ever had total privacy?'

  'Not really,' she gasped. 'I've spent evenings here before, when we were quite alone.'

  'Yes,' he agreed between kisses, 'but that's not quite the same thing.'

  Suddenly there was a violent hissing noise from somewhere in the background. Daniel jerked free with an appalled cry of 'Ye gods!' and vanished into the kitchen. Lee followed just as he opened a window, frantically flapping at the smoke.

  'Is the dinner ruined?' she asked cheerfully.

  'No, that was an early stage-a minor disaster and easily remedied. Here-' He poured her a glass of red wine and made her stand clear.

  'Can't I help?' she protested.

  'Menial tasks only. Women shouldn't really be allowed in kitchens. You're all rotten cooks.'

  When she saw how at home he was in his gadget-filled kitchen, she had to concede his point.

  'You're a fraud,' she laughed as they stood watching bubbling saucepans. 'You told Phoebe she had to go to Paris out of politeness, but you were actually getting rid of the poor girl.'

  'She really did have a long-standing engagement with the Bressons,' Daniel protested, 'and it would have been rude to break it. But I must admit I'm glad to have the house to myself for a week.'

  'Yes, I know exactly what you mean,' Lee said. 'I felt the same when I was finally alone. Perfect freedom from inquisitive, adolescent eyes.'

  'But haven't you still got Mark with you?'

  'Not any more. He announced yesterday morning that he felt like taking a driving holiday, and by evening he'd gone.'

  'In that thing?' Daniel asked hilariously. 'He's mad. Where does he think it's going to take him?'

  'He was very cagey about his destination, but he couldn't meet my eye and his passport's missing.'

  'You're trying to tell me that he's gone to Paris, aren't you?'

  'I think it's likely.'

  Daniel sighed. 'What it is to be young! Only besotted love could explain his taking that contraption on a long journey and actually expecting to get there. Thanks for telling me. I'll phone Madame Bresson and warn her to look out for an English boy with a moonstruck expression.'

  While he tended his saucepans Lee left the kitchen, meaning to make herself useful by setting the table. But on the threshold of the dining room she stopped, riveted.

  Everything was prepared, including a small round table for two, covered with a cloth that swept the floor all the way around. It was exquisitely laid with silver and crystal. Silver candelabra stood waiting to be lit, and by one of the place-settings was a tiny vase bearing a single flower.

  Lee's eyebrows rose a fraction and her mouth moved in a tender smile. Whoever had gone to so much trouble over this room had meant to be taken seriously.

  When the meal was ready Daniel loaded it onto a heated trolley and wheeled it in. He made Lee sit while he served her, and smiled as he saw her looking at the rose. When her starter was before her he lit the candles and went to switch off the electric light. The room was immediately thrown into romantic dimness, lit only by the dancing flames.

  'You forgot the sweet music,' she murmured.

  'No, I didn't.' Daniel made his way to the hi-fi, touched a switch and immediately there was the faint background sound of violins. 'How's that?'

  'Perfect,' she said, her lips quivering. 'You haven't missed a trick.'

  He'd seated himself opposite her and looked up to find her eyes, full of fun, fixed on him. 'You're very disheartening,' he growled, 'when I'm doing my best.'

  'Daniel, I think it's all wonderful, I really do. But I can't see what I'm eating.'

  Grumbling, he got up again and put on the light. By the time he'd turned back to her she'd managed to rearrange her face in sober lines.

  'What shall we talk about?' he demanded despondently. 'The stock market? The state of the country? You name it.'

  'Did Phoebe show you my pictures of her?'

  'Yes, I think they're wonderful. And I'm very grateful for whatever it was you said to her.'

  Lee stared at him. 'What do you mean? Didn't she tell you what I said?'

  'No, and I was tactful enough not to ask. But you must have discouraged her pretty thoroughly because she's been sunk in thought.'

  Lee frowned. 'I don't think I could say I discouraged her. I warned you I'd give her the truth if she asked for it, and she did.'

  She related as much of the conversation as she could remember. 'I did emphasise what a hard life it is, and how uncertain,' she said at the end. 'But I couldn't compete with her in an argument, especially when she started throwing legal maxims at me.'

  'Tied you in knots, did she?' Daniel asked sympathetically. 'She does that with me. Don't worry, darling. She's got it out of her system now.'

  They put the dishes in the kitchen and stood with their arms entwined while the coffee perked. Daniel carried the coffee-tray back into the dining room and placed it on a low table by the sofa. Then he pulled Lee down beside him and gave her a swift kiss before pouring her coffee. As he handed it to her he studied the slight frown on her face.

  'What is it?' he asked, concerned.

  'Nothing. I just think Phoebe's going to give you a surprise. She's as stubborn as you are.'

  'Forget it,' he said with a smile. 'I've never had to become the heavy father to win battles with Phoebe. I rely on low cunning. It's far m
ore effective.'

  'How?' asked Lee, who'd always found that, however low her own cunning, Sonya's was lower.

  'When she was little we had the classic struggle about her going to sleep.'

  'And you won it?' Lee asked, wide-eyed.

  'It was a push-over,' he declared cheerfully. 'I just used to bet her fifty pence she couldn't stay awake all night. The poor little soul used to lie there fighting to keep her eyes open, and she'd be asleep within ten minutes.'

  Lee was awed. 'Now I know you're a genius.'

  He grinned and poured her a brandy. 'I'm full of dirty tricks like that. I'll teach them to you when we have our children.'

  'You're taking a lot for granted,' she said, speaking lightly to disguise the jolt his words gave her.

  'Am I? You know I want to marry you, and now I'm in a mood to kidnap you and carry you off to church. I want to see my ring on your finger and my baby in your arms.'

  'Don't I get a choice about that?'

  He smiled in self-mockery. 'You can choose, darling-as long as you choose me. I've waited, and I'll go on waiting if I have to.' He drew her gently into his arms. 'But, for both our sakes, don't make me wait too long,' he murmured.

  She wasn't sure how to answer this, but his kiss made words unnecessary. The pressure of his lips was tender and gentle, coaxing her to relax and welcome him. Yet behind it she could feel the strength of purpose. As soon as she began to kiss him back his arms tightened. His tongue coaxed her lips apart and she let him invade her. Delicious sensations were filling her, making her body come alive with desire. It was something she'd never wanted to feel again, and yet it was so beautiful that she couldn't regret it.

  For years she'd lived celibate from choice, trying to believe it was enough. Now she knew that she'd made an old woman of herself too soon, and that it was a crime against her young, ardent flesh. It was a crime also against her heart, which wanted to swell with joy at her lover's embrace, as it did now.

  Daniel held her for a long time, kissing and caressing her, gently rousing her desire without rushing her. She had what she needed, which was time to relax, to move at her own speed, while still knowing that he was in control, and she could trust him.