Everywhere You Don't Belong

by Gabriel Bump

  Watching the mountains dip outside my window like animate massive portraits, I thought about what Big Columbus wanted. He wanted a place for his people. He wanted his life to make sense. I understood that.

  The radio mentioned four missing people, presumed dead. They didn’t say much else. It was all burned down.

  Juna rolled down the windows and let Nevada’s sunrise spill into the car. We pulled over in the desert. I pulled the gun from the bag. I threw as far as I could, which wasn’t far at all.

  They agreed to take us to the ocean. After the ocean, who knew?

  Where We Belong

  Sometimes, when it’s morning and we’re both tired, I stare across the table and see Janice again in Juna’s backseat.

  I see her hair rattling in the wind. I feel my hand on her knee, held there for hours and miles.

  I see her on the beach, picking up empty shells. I hear her kicking sand. I smell salt on her shoulders.

  I turn to her whenever the future frightens me, the present frightens me, the past ambushes my peace, and sleep doesn’t come.

  When the sun rises and Janice looks right at me, I see them all in her eyes. Grandma and Paul, happy, laughing, waving—safe; everyone in South Shore, safe and happy. They’re okay without us. They forgive us for leaving.

  We’re okay too.

  Yes. Right where we belong.

  Acknowledgments

  Thank you, family: Mom, Dad, Mike, Nat, Chris, Grandpa, Grandma; Oklahoma cousins, uncle, and aunt; Harlem cousins, uncles, and aunt; Uncle Jim.

  Thank you, Chicago family: Jer, Jon, Ted, Cynthia, Nate, Alex, Mike Case, Rich, Tim, Schutz, Ben, Pat, Don, Addie, Ciara, Lexie, Isa, Lex, Laura, Andrew, Julia, Wendy, James, Cleaves, Scoop, Tracy, Jay, Rah, J-Woo, DP.

  Thank you, Halie.

  Thank you, Theoharides family. Thank you, Costello family. We miss you, Alex.

  Thank you, Sojourner.

  Thank you, University of Chicago Laboratory Schools folks.

  Thank you, University of Missouri folks.

  Thank you, School of the Art Institute folks.

  Thank you, University of Massachusetts folks.

  Thank you, patient teachers: Ruth Golb, Wayne Brasler, Charles Brahnam, Jess Bowers, Mark Booth, Todd Hasak-Lowy, Janet Desaulniers, Jenny Magnus, James McManus, Sabina Murray, Edie Meidav, Noy Holland, Arthur Flowers.

  Thank you, brilliant classmates: Clare O’Connor, Alena Saunders, Ann Ward, Chelsea Hogue, Laura Warman, Brendan Bowles, Jane Dykema, Chris Lott, Zoe Mungin, Liza Birnbaum.

  Thank you, Care Center. Thank you, Holyoke.

  Thank you, Studio Paris.

  Thank you, Disquiet International Literary Program.

  Thank you, Algonquin Books.

  Thank you, Lisboa.

  Thank you, Harlem.

  Thank you, Buffalo.

  Thank you, South Shore. Love you.

  Thank you, Alexa Stark.

  Thank you, Kathy Pories.

  Thank you, Adam Levin.

  Thank you, Jeff Parker. Love you, dog.

  Thank you, Dr. Grace Gibson.

  Thank you, Caitlin.

  Thank you, Hoot. Thank you, Frank.

  You all make life worth living. You all brought me here.

  About the Author

  Gabriel Bump grew up in South Shore, Chicago. His nonfiction and fiction have appeared in Slam magazine, the Huffington Post, Springhouse Journal, and other publications. He was awarded the 2016 Deborah Slosberg Memorial Award for Fiction. He received his MFA in fiction from the University of Massachusetts, Amherst. He lives in Buffalo, New York.

  Published by

  ALGONQUIN BOOKS OF CHAPEL HILL

  Post Office Box 2225

  Chapel Hill, North Carolina 27515-2225

  a division of

  WORKMAN PUBLISHING

  225 Varick Street

  New York, New York 10014

  © 2020 by Gabriel Bump.

  All rights reserved.

  This is a work of fiction. While, as in all fiction, the literary perceptions and insights are based on experience, all names, characters, places, and incidents either are products of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously.

  LIBRARY OF CONGRESS CATALOGING-IN-PUBLICATION DATA: LC record available at https://lccn.loc.gov/2019008323

  e-ISBN: 9781643750224