Broken Dreams

by Kelly Elliott

  “Jealous of Courtney?” she asked quietly.

  I felt the heat building in my whole body. If Anna had talked about Courtney to my mother, I wasn’t sure what I would do to Anna. “What did Anna tell you about Courtney?”

  “Nothing.”

  “Mom, what did she tell you?” I asked very slowly, trying to keep calm.

  “Reed, she just said you’d told her that it wasn’t fair to her that you were in love with another woman and that you thought it was best if y’all broke up. I’m proud of you by the way. I appreciate the fact that you didn’t lead her on any more than you already had.”

  What? What in the hell does that mean? “Wait, what does that mean, Mom? What do you mean, lead her on any more?”

  She let out a sigh and then chuckled. “Honestly, Reed, anyone can see you’re head over heels in love with Courtney. I noticed it months ago when you couldn’t keep your eyes off of her while your girlfriend was standing next to you. I noticed it last night when the two of you were dancing. You could practically see how smitten the both of you were with each other. Now, stop being so damn stubborn, and for once in your life, take a chance on love.”

  “Um…” I didn’t even know what to say. If my own mother can see how much I’m in love with Courtney, then why can’t Court see it?

  I heard the back door open, and I glanced up to see Courtney standing there. She looked absolutely breathtaking. Her blonde hair was up in a messy ponytail, and she had on yoga pants with a Texas A&M T-shirt. I couldn’t help but smile as she gave me a weak smile.

  “Hey, Mom, I’ve got to let you go.”

  “Oh, sure, the talk gets heavy, and you need to what? Go feed the dogs?”

  I let out a laugh and shook my head. “I’m cow-sitting, Mom. I need to go feed the cows. I love you. Talk to you later.” I hit End before she could say anything else.

  Courtney walked up and sat down next to me. She had her ever-present Kindle in her hand, and she leaned her head back and took in a deep breath. “God, I must have needed that sleep,” she said as she dropped her head and looked out over the pasture.

  I sat there, waiting to see if she would say anything about her dream. Does she even remember it? Does she remember being in my arms, terrified and shaking? I cleared my throat. “How did you sleep, angel?”

  She turned her head, and her smile faded for a brief second before she flashed that beautiful smile of hers. “So, I earned a nickname from you, huh?” she said with a wink. “I think I slept okay. Were you in the room at one point? I thought you were, but I think I was dreaming. And don’t get all smart-ass with me. It wasn’t a sex dream.”

  She doesn’t remember. I smiled as I stood up and winked at her. “Baby, you wish you were having sex dreams about me.”

  I turned and walked into the house while she sat there in a laughing fit.

  I walked up to the stove and held out my shaking hand. She’ll tell me when she’s ready to tell me. Don’t push her, Reed. Just don’t push her away.

  I made up two bowls of stew and took them outside. She was buried deep into a book, and the smile on her face was so damn cute.

  “Hungry? I’ve got some stew here.”

  She looked up and nodded her head as she reached out for the stew. She balanced her Kindle on her knees and went back to reading as she blew on the stew and then took a bite.

  “So, what has you smiling like that? What are you reading?” I asked before taking a bite of the stew.

  She closed her eyes and then opened them. “It’s just a love story that’s making me swoon.”

  “Swoon?” I asked.

  She looked at me, scrunching up her nose, and I about died. It was the cutest thing I’d ever seen, and I just wanted to grab her and make love to her right here on the back porch.

  “Swoon, Reed. You know…swoon!” she said with a giggle.

  “Uh…doesn’t swoon mean to faint from extreme emotion?” I asked.

  She turned a little bit more and smiled bigger. “Yes, so swooning is like being in a state of ecstasy.”

  “Okay…so, it’s turning you on?” I asked.

  She rolled her eyes. “No! It’s romantic. The guy is being utterly romantic, and it gives me butterflies in my stomach.” She turned back and began reading again.

  “What’s he doing?”

  She peeked over and looked at me. “You really want to know?” She slightly tilted her head. “Is there a reason you’re being so nice?”

  My heart hurt a little when she asked that. “I really want to know. I’m interested in knowing what makes you swoon,” I said with a wink.

  She sat back and took another bite of stew. After a few seconds of chewing, she began talking. “Well, it’s one of my favorite books ever. It’s called The Marriage Bargain, and the guy just realized he loves the girl. It was just a really sweet moment, and those always have the same effect on me every time.”

  I nodded and then asked, “How many times have you read it?”

  She shrugged. “I don’t know. Maybe nine or ten times.”

  I choked on my stew and sat up. “Ten times! You’ve read the same book ten times?”

  She bit down on her lower lip and whispered, “Okay, maybe fifteen…give or take one or two.”

  Then, I really started choking.

  “Are you okay, Reed?” she asked before she started laughing.

  “Holy shit, Court. I’m going to die on elk stew here.”

  “What? What did you just say?”

  “I said, I’m going to die from choking on the stew. Fifteen times?”

  “No! You said, elk stew. Oh God! Oh God! Am I eating elk?” She began flailing her free arm all around.

  “Um…yeah, I got it from Layton’s freezer and heated it up.”

  “Eww-uh! Oh Christ!” She jumped up, leaned over the rail, and started spitting.

  Lulu, the chocolate lab, came running over to check out what was going on. I almost fell out of my seat when I saw Courtney put the bowl down, and the dog started eating the stew.

  “No, Lulu! No! Bad dog,” I said.

  I went to get up and grab the bowl when Midnight came running over to get his piece of the pie, and he knocked me off-balance. I stumbled and tried to grab a hold of the rail. Courtney screamed and reached out for me.

  Oh hell, this is going to hurt. I tumbled over the rail and landed on my side with a thud. I was pretty sure that if I hadn’t broken a rib, I sure as hell bruised it.

  “Reed! Oh my God!” Courtney yelled as she came running down the steps and up to me.

  I held up my bowl of stew and smiled. “Look, I didn’t even spill any!” I said.

  She busted out laughing and then stood there with her hands on her hips. “Jesus, you idiot! You scared the hell out of me.” She turned and started to make her way back up the stairs. “For the next three weeks, I’m in charge of all meals. No more elk or deer or rabbit or whatever the hell you Texas boys eat.” She reached down and picked up her bowl but not before scratching Lulu and Midnight behind their ears and kissing them both.

  I watched as she started to walk into the house with both dogs following her.

  “I’m fine! Really, I don’t need any help!” I yelled out.

  She waved her hand and disappeared.

  Yep, the next three weeks are going to be either pure heaven or pure hell.

  The last four days had been pure heaven. Reed would work around the ranch during most of the day. By the time he’d come back, I would have dinner cooked, and he’d take a shower, eat, and then head to bed because he was so exhausted. I’d fought the urge to head up to his room on more than one occasion.

  Stupid good-looking cowboy in his stupid Wranglers and stupid tight-ass T-shirt, coming in all sweaty and hot-looking.

  Whenever he’d taken off his cowboy hat, I’d swear I could have an orgasm just from looking at his messy brown hair.

  Ugh. I closed my eyes and shook the image from my head. Stop this, Courtney. You don’t need a man in you
r life. The last one turned out to be no different than all the others ones, and Reed Moore has been nothing but trouble. He’s certainly not your Prince Charming. Nope.

  Liar. He is so my Prince Charming.

  I looked back down at my computer screen and tried to concentrate on the book I was editing. Fuck this shit. I need a break. I saved my work and closed my laptop, and then I reached for my Kindle. I opened up the book I was currently reading, and I slowly began to lose myself in the story as the sound of the pool water relaxed me even more.

  I heard someone clear his throat, and I looked up to see Mitch standing in front of me.

  I quickly stood up and said, “What are you doing here? If Reed sees you here—”

  “I came to get a few things I’d forgotten at the foreman’s cabin because I left in such a hurry.”

  I sat back down and looked away. “Oh. Well, I don’t know where Reed put the keys, and I have no idea where he is or when he will be back.”

  He let out a laugh. “It’s all right, Court. I can jimmy the door open and get in.”

  I shrugged my shoulders and went back to reading. I really didn’t want to see him right now.

  “Courtney?” he asked in almost a whisper.

  “What?” I said, trying to sound unaffected by his presence.

  I wasn’t even sure why I was feeling upset. I was glad we were over.

  During the last few days of spending time with Reed, I’d realized that I had just used Mitch to hide my true feelings for Reed. Although, right now, I was not anywhere near ready to admit those feelings to myself, let alone to Reed.

  “I’m really sorry for what I did to you. I didn’t mean to hurt you.”

  I sat up and looked him in the eyes. “Really? You admitted that you’d only dated me to keep me away from Reed, and you fucked around with your ex for six months. And you’re sorry? Well, go take your sorry and shove it up your cheating ass.”

  I sat back and acted like I was reading. He turned and walked away. I let out the breath I had been holding, and I quickly wiped away the tear rolling down my cheek.

  I hate all men. I hate them.

  I was sitting in the little nook in Layton and Whitley’s room, reading The Marriage Bargain for about the twentieth—plus ten—time. There was no way I would ever let Reed know how many times I’d actually read this book.

  When I heard a knock on the bedroom door, I called out, “Come in.”

  I smiled when I saw Reed walking in. Every time he entered a room, the hairs on my arms would stand up, and I’d get the silliest feeling in my stomach.

  “Court, you’ve either been reading, or you’ve been on your computer for the last week. You need to get out. Want to go for a ride with me?”

  I set my Kindle down and pulled my knees up to my chest. “Where are you going?”

  He smiled the biggest, goofiest smile I’d ever seen, and I couldn’t help but giggle.

  “My place, up the road,” he said.

  The look in his eyes held me captive for a few seconds.

  Reed had bought the fifty acres Whit had wanted when she first moved here. At the time, neither one of them had known that they were bidding against each other. Reed had won out, and it was for the best because Whitley would have just ended up selling it.

  I jumped up and said, “I’d love to see your place.”

  We drove in silence for fifteen minutes on the way to his property.

  Reed looked over at me and asked, “What were you reading?”

  I shrugged my shoulders and lied, “The Lost Soul. I just finished editing it and was reading it on my Kindle.”

  He laughed as if he knew I was not telling him the truth, and he shook his head. “Really? ’Cause you have that same goofy smile you had on your face the other day.”

  I looked out the window and smirked. “Well, you know, more than one book can make a girl swoon.”

  “I see.” He pulled up to a gravel driveway and punched in a code to open the gate.

  We drove for just a bit before he turned a corner, and I saw the house. I let out a gasp and put my hand over my mouth.

  “Holy shit! A log cabin?” I asked as I turned and looked at him.

  He had the biggest smile on his face. “Yep! I needed to come by and check things out since I haven’t been here in a week.”

  He parked the truck, jumped out, and ran around to my side. I’d quickly learned that Texas boys liked opening doors for girls. I had to admit that I loved it. I loved it even more when Reed did it because he would always hold his hand out and help me down. I was afraid that one of these days, I was going to launch myself at him and kiss him because it turned me on so damn much.

  “Let me show you around the place, angel.”

  Oh yeah, and the fact that he was calling me angel turned me on, too. It didn’t help that I hadn’t had sex in over six months, and I hadn’t packed a single vibrator from home.

  As we walked up to the log home, I couldn’t believe how charming it was. I’d always wanted to live in a log home. My parents had a log cabin in Maine where we would spend the summers, and I loved it there. Granted, this one could fit in my parents’ cabin five times over, but it had the same appeal, and just from the first glance, I loved this one, too.

  “I pretty much only have to put the finish on the cabinets and a few other things, and then it’ll be done,” he said with a smile as he unlocked the front door.

  “Wait, you built this yourself?” I asked, shocked, as I looked all around.

  He let out a small laugh. “Yep! Layton and a few of the guys helped me, but I pretty much did it all on my own. It’s been a dream of mine to live in a log cabin.”

  I spun around and looked at him. My heart dropped, and I was pretty sure I had just fallen in love with him a little more. “Really? Mine, too,” I said out loud, regretting it the moment I did.

  He gave me that crooked-ass grin of his and nodded his head. He grabbed my hand and began giving me a tour of the house. We walked into the living room that contained a huge rock fireplace. From there, we went through three bedrooms, two and a half bathrooms, and a huge laundry room. The house was big enough for a family of four or even five.

  The living room, dining room, and kitchen were all open to each other. When we walked into the kitchen, I let out a gasp. It was huge. I glanced down at the island, and the first thing I thought of was Reed making love to me on it. I put my hands up to my face to cool my hot cheeks.

  “You okay, Court?” Reed asked. “I know it’s hot in here and all. I don’t have the AC on.”

  I gave him a weak smile. Oh, if he only knew the dirty thoughts running around in my head right now.

  As I walked by the island, I ran my hand over the cool granite. “I love granite,” I whispered.

  Reed leaned down and put his lips up against my ear. “I love this island,” he whispered back.

  He quickly turned and walked away before I could even say anything.

  Holy shit. Did he know what I was thinking? Was he thinking the same thing?

  After I got my wits about me, I followed him down a hall. “How many square feet is the house, Reed?”

  “It’s just about three thousand. Not nearly as big as Layton’s place, but it’s way more space than I need. I love it.”

  I nodded my head even though I was still behind him, so I knew he couldn’t see me. “So do I. I grew up in a huge house, and I always wanted something smaller, cozier, if that makes sense.”

  He turned and walked backward as he smiled. “Yep. To me, this is huge. I grew up in a small house, single mom and all.”

  He turned back around and opened up a door, and we walked into the huge master bedroom. In the corner was a fireplace, and next to that was a huge bay window with—oh God. It was the window seat of my dreams. On each side of the window was a built-in bookcase. The bookcases went from floor to ceiling, and I about let out a moan while thinking of all the books I could put on those shelves to fill them up.

 
I followed Reed as he opened up another door. I noticed a huge walk-in closet that I was pretty sure was bigger than my bedroom in my current house. I had bought Whitley’s house in Llano from her parents after she got engaged and moved in with Layton.

  “Holy moly! This closet is huge!” I said.

  Reed grabbed my hand and led me into the master bathroom. It was amazing.

  “Oh, Reed…” I turned and looked at him.

  He was grinning from ear to ear.

  “Did you design all of this yourself?”

  He let out a laugh. “Hell no! My sister said a woman needed to design the bathroom, so I let her make all the decisions in here.”

  I stopped and looked at him. “You didn’t have Anna make any decisions?”

  His smile faded, and he looked down at the floor. “Um…nah. I never brought Anna out here.”

  I tried really hard not to smile, but the fact that Anna had never set foot in this house made me want to hug myself.

  The jet tub in the corner was flanked by two giant windows. It almost looked like the tub was sitting outside. The light in the bathroom was amazing. I walked up to the shower and stepped inside. There was a rain showerhead, a few other heads—I had no idea what they did—and a pretty decent-sized bench. I was stunned by how big the shower actually was. Two people could easily fit inside. I closed my eyes and pictured Reed making love to me in here with the water falling down on us. I didn’t mean to, but I let out a small moan. The next thing I knew, I felt him behind me. I was almost afraid to open my eyes.

  “Pretty amazing shower, huh?” he asked.

  I slowly turned and looked up into his eyes. Kiss me. Oh God, Reed, please kiss me. “It’s, um…it’s beautiful.”

  He slowly backed up and stepped out of the shower, and I instantly felt like a young child who had just gotten her favorite toy taken away. As I stepped out of the shower, he took my hand again and asked how I liked the house. It was almost like he was looking for…my approval.

  No, that is just silly, Courtney. Why would he need your approval?