Blackout: A Romance Anthology

by Stephanie St. Klaire

  “I’m sorry about your dad.”

  “I know you were gone but I’m sure you heard all about it.”

  “I did, but I’m still sorry. I didn’t know about the stuff with your mom though.”

  “Yep, turns out my daddy who I thought hung the moon was a piece of shit. I’ll always love him, but when you realize your entire life had been a lie it’s hard to ever really look at that person the same again, you know?”

  “I can’t imagine how hard all of that was on you.”

  “It was hard,” I confess like I’m laid out on my therapist’s couch again. “I may have partied a bit too much and that coping mechanism led to an extra semester of school, but I finished.”

  “Any serious boyfriends?”

  I freeze on the spot. To say I’m shocked at his directness would be an understatement.

  “Why do you want to know that?”

  “I need to know everything, Mouse.”

  My breath hitches when he uses his old nickname for me. Nobody has called me that for well...twelve years. Back in middle school when I wasn’t surrounded by our core group of friends I barely spoke. If the teacher called on me my answers were rarely audible and to most, I was quiet as a mouse. Oh, how things have changed. Well, maybe not my love of cheese but there isn’t anything quite about me.

  I’m so lost in my emotions he has to ask me again.

  “Please tell me. Everything. I need to know everything.”

  “I dated. Had the usual college hookups but nothing serious.”

  “What about Seth?”

  It seems someone’s been staying more in the know than I would have thought.

  “I’m getting there. I didn’t interrupt you, did I?”

  “Fine,” he says on a sigh.

  “After school I came back home, and it took me a good year to get into nursing school. There was some stiff competition definitely not enough openings and it took longer than I expected. I worked admitting in the ER at Providence while I waited and while going to nursing school. Once I was done, I was lucky enough to get on full time in the ER at the hospital back home.”

  “I’ve heard you’re the best of the best. I’m proud of you, Rach.”

  Giggling I say, “Someone’s been keeping tabs on me.”

  “Of course I have. What happened after that?”

  Of course you have? What does that even mean, Reece?

  My heart is fluttering all over itself, his words confusing everything I thought I knew about the last twelve years and of course that infamous day when he broke my heart. I’ve never felt more confused and somehow somewhat at peace.

  “Well, I love my job. It’s long hours and hard work, but it’s worth it. I really like the people I work with and hopefully, I’ll keep moving up. I mean, I won’t be a big fancy doctor like some people,” I say, poking him in his chest.

  I expected a chuckle out of him, but he’s not letting me get away so easily.

  “When did you meet Seth?”

  “You are relentless, aren’t you?”

  “Everything, Rachel. Just give it all to me.”

  His head whips to the side and I feel him flinch. I try to turn to see if I can see what it is he’s seen, but he tightens his hold on me.

  “What was it?”

  “Just a failed attempt at getting the doors open in one of the other elevator cars. Now, tell me about Seth.”

  Part of me knows he just saw something that would scare the shit out of me and he’s protecting me, but the other part of me wants to take advantage of every terrifying moment this man will give me, and I have no problem letting it go.

  “Well, I had been dating someone else, but it wasn’t that serious. I was somewhat ghosting the other guy when Seth started at the hospital. He was a little older than me, a surgeon, nice guy.”

  “What happened?”

  “Well, things were really good. So good we moved in together.” Reece fidgets underneath me and he’s clearly uncomfortable, but he wanted to know. “Turns out without the excitement of on-call rooms and stealing time where we could get it to see each other we didn’t really have a lot going on when it came to our relationship. I think the passion and the risk of getting busted at work was more of a thrill than an actual connection. The sex was great, but that was really about it.”

  He lets go of me getting to his feet. He begins pacing back and forth in the small space. Only able to go a couple steps each way before turning and the glare on his face isn’t just from the glow light, he looks pissed.

  “TMI?”

  “Yes. No. I guess I asked for it, but wow, that was more than I bargained for.”

  “Sorry.”

  He takes a step in a different direction inadvertently kicking my bag causing something inside to start vibrating across the floor. A smile slowly spreads across his lavender illuminated face. “Your penis on a rope, I presume?”

  I scurry to get to the bag to turn the stupid gag gift off but seem to just be fumbling around finding everything but the vibrating device and in my frustration end up dumping all of the contents out onto the elevator floor, again.

  “Uh, Rach. We just picked all of that up.”

  “Duh, I know that, but I can’t find the damn soap on a rope to turn it off.”

  Why the whirring sound of the soap has me so embarrassed, I have no idea, but it does. I’m a nurse. I’ve seen things. Like, a lot of things. So, my irrational embarrassment makes no sense. Not much about the evening does.

  Squatting down in front of me he takes the humiliation to the next level. “Maybe it’s the glow light, but I do believe I see you blushing Ms. Newland.”

  “Be nice, Reece.”

  “I am being nice,” he says while picking up the item in question as it bounces against his foot. “Found it.”

  He stands up and holds it up into the darkness where I can no longer see it, but I swear the sound is only getting louder when I stand up to take it from him. The Reece I remember from our youth is now in the elevator with us. Holding the dick on a rope up high above his head he doesn’t budge. I’m glad it seems his anxiety has diminished, but I still want to punch him for getting so much pleasure from my embarrassment.

  “Give it to me, Reece.” I immaturely jump up like a little kid not smart enough to realize they’ll never get the ball their dad is holding up out of their reach.

  “What’s the matter, Mouse?” There he goes with my nickname again. “You embarrassed that I’m holding your penis in my hand.” It’s fitting his face is glowing purple because the smile on it mimics that of the Cheshire Cat.

  He’s pleased with himself and I’ll let him be if it gets his mind off of me and having sex in on-call rooms. Who knew a vibrating soap on a rope was the magic solution to calming him down. I still need to turn it off before I combust.

  “It’s not mine, you big oaf! Now give it to me.”

  Using his empty hand, he searches in the dark and finds my bare arm and my skin instantly comes to life. He slowly, and I might even say seductively, glides his fingers down my arm until he’s holding my hand.

  We stare at each other in a haze of pink and purple and all that can be heard is the vibration coming from his hand and the pounding of my heart. There’s no way he doesn’t hear it. The touch of his hand holding mine has me electrified from head to toe. His smile is gone, replaced by a heated stare that I can’t deny still reaches the very depths of my soul. I feel us turning a corner as we literally and figuratively stand here in this moment under a blanket of darkness and heightened anxiety.

  Anxiety he’s been trying to cover by keeping us talking.

  Anxiety slowly being forgotten with the lust and need that has overpowered it from a simple touch of his hand. His hand that is turning mine over so my palm is face up.

  Bringing his vibrating hand down to mine he puts the soap in my upturned hand and then ever so gently pushes my hand closed around it. Letting him take control while his eyes pin me to the spot he moves my now closed
hand to my mid-section just above my core and pushes it in place, keeping his hand there for a moment.

  To say I’m not disappointed he didn’t move my hand lower would be a lie, but this is to be expected. No matter how angry I’ve been at him the last twelve years he’s still a gentleman who would never cross that line unless he knew I was one hundred percent on board. We aren’t there yet and as much as I would love to take advantage of our circumstances and time alone, now is not the time. Something is happening between us and it feels like it may be worth more than banging in an elevator.

  Does it sound hot? Sure does.

  Is it the smart thing to do? Nope.

  Do I feel like it may not take much to make me change my mind? Without a doubt.

  He releases my hand. “All yours.” His voice breaks the trance I was in reminding me to search for the OFF switch. The OFF switch that of course I cannot find.

  “Shit!”

  “Is your penis not doing as it’s told, Mouse?”

  Oh, he thinks he’s so funny.

  “Watch yourself, Evans,” I warn him, dropping to my knees and feeling around the floor for my phone.

  I press the home button on my phone and turn on the flashlight feature. The brightness nearly blinding after all this time in the dark. But what really stands out is the time.

  “Reece, we’ve already been in here for nearly an hour and a half. What the hell is going on?”

  “Hey, just focus on one thing at a time. For now, let’s just get your little friend turned off. I mean, unless you had a different idea.”

  “Reece! I’m being serious right now. This is crazy!”

  He joins me on the floor and sits directly across from me. Leaning forward he cups my face in his hand and dares me to look away from him. “Rach, we’re gonna be okay.” I can’t stop the tear that escapes or the one after that, but I do nod my understanding to him. His thumbs brush across my cheeks wiping away my salty tears. “Now, you gonna turn that thing off or not?”

  His hands release my face but the heat they leave behind is unlike anything I’ve ever known and they’re doing their job by distracting me from thinking about how long we’ve been stuck.

  “Here, hold this,” I order when I shove my phone in his hand. “I can’t hold on to my phone and mess with this thing at the same time.”

  “Interesting,” he says, following my command and shining the light on the vibrating dick in my hands.

  “What?”

  “You need two hands. My mind is racing with reasons why you might need two hands.”

  “Real mature, Reece.”

  “Listen, I could have gone a lot of places with this whole vibrating cock situation. I think I have restrained myself quite well, thank you very much. Can you imagine if you were stuck in here with Miles? I’m a saint compared to that idiot.”

  “You aren’t wrong. You are handling this better than Miles would but that isn’t a very high bar you’ve set for yourself. I’m not sure you want to compare yourself to him.” Still fumbling there is no switch to be found. “Ugh! This is ridiculous. There is no damn switch!”

  “Here,” he says holding the phone out to me. “Give me your penis.”

  “You are so stupid,” I say, handing it over.

  He turns something near the rope at the bottom of my penis and the wretched device finally falls silent.

  “I’m sorry, what was that last comment you made. Something about me being stupid.”

  “Sorry. I guess I don’t know my way around vibrating penises as well as you do.”

  “Touché,” he says, throwing it back at me. “Hold your phone up and I’ll pick up your mess.”

  I hold up the phone and help him pick up the mess I made, again. Once everything is collected, he takes the bag and carefully steps away with it.

  “I’m just gonna put your bag o’ dicks over here in the corner where we’re less liking to have another incident. Safer that way.”

  I roll my eyes at his sarcasm still unable to stop the giggle that slips out. “Sounds like a good idea.”

  He takes my hand and leads me back to the spot we had been sitting before he shot up and started pacing. I try to get a look out into the hotel to see if there’s any activity, but it’s nothing but darkness. It’s clear he doesn’t want me to have much time to investigate either because he sits pulling me down next to him.

  “So, where were we?”

  CHAPTER 7

  Reece

  “There isn’t really much left to tell.”

  “Sure there is. You and dickhead moved in together, but he was too stupid to see what he had. He was an idiot and let you slip through his fingers. What happened after that? How did it end? Do you still work together?”

  I have no idea when masochism became a thing for me, but it looks like I’m into it because I can’t seem to stop myself from asking her more and more about her time without me, and with him. What is wrong with me? I have her tucked in tight, arms around each other and I’m asking her to tell me about her love life.

  Yep, I’m a masochist.

  “I think you have a distorted memory of me because I don’t think he feels like he let anything slip away when he turns off his penthouse light and goes to sleep every night with his socialite wife. He’s doing just fine living his life in New York City now.”

  Thank fucking God, he’s on the other side of the country and not lurking in the halls of the hospital. That would be a problem for me.

  Hey, asshole. You don’t get to care who she works with.

  Shaking my head in an effort to bring me back to my rational senses where this is simply a moment in time where she’s stuck with me and not the beginning of the rest of my life I say, “Is that hard for you? Him being married?”

  “Nope. He was just filler.” She lifts her cheek from my pec scrunching her nose and looking all sorts of adorable. “I’m a bitch aren’t I.”

  I place a soft kiss on her forehead. “Nah, just honest.”

  “I’m a bitch.”

  “Well, I’m glad he was nothing more than filler.”

  Her body freezes in my arms and maybe I’m pushing it with the honesty and the innocent kisses, but we’ve spent too many years playing games and letting other people control our lives.

  “Reece…” she whispers.

  “Rachel.”

  “What’s happening?”

  “What do you mean?”

  I’m pretty sure I know what she’s referring to, but I need her to say it.

  She unwraps herself from me picks my blazer up slipping her arms into the sleeves letting it engulf her. When she pulls the lapels tight to each other it’s clear she’s feeling insecure and maybe a little uncomfortable. Of course, I don’t want her to feel uncomfortable, but if things are going to get real between us, then I may not be able to prevent it.

  “Why are we sitting here chatting and catching up and not freaking out over the fact that we’re currently stuck hundreds of feet above ground in a tiny box that could plummet to the ground at any moment? We could die in this thing.”

  Tucking a piece of her hair behind her ear so I can see more of her radiant face only glowing more than usual thanks to the pink concoction around her neck. “We aren’t going to die, Mouse.”

  She gifts me a timid smile when I use her nickname. “I hope you’re right, but that’s not the point. Why don’t we care? Why are we sitting here calmly talking like we have nowhere else to be? Like our friends aren’t out there in the dark as well? I mean, is all of Vegas blacked out? Is it just this hotel?”

  “To be honest, I don’t really care. I’m rather enjoying myself, even if I have had to listen to you talk about your fondness for on-call rooms.”

  Her eyes roll and even though I can see her fighting it, she smiles for a brief moment before her mouth straightens. “But why don’t we care, Reece?”

  “I think you know why, Rachel.”

  She can’t admit it out loud but what’s happening in this small space i
s actually pretty epic. We’re finding each other again. She’s letting down her guard and letting me in.

  “But I’m not supposed to like you. You broke my heart. Why would I rather be stuck in complete darkness in a perilous situation with you than out partying with my friends in Vegas?”

  “Rachel, you don’t need me to tell you that. You know why.”

  “I know I do. But I’ve spent twelve years hating you. It doesn’t make any sense.”

  “Sure it does. You never get over your first love. I know I haven’t.”

  She shakes her head and I can barely see them, but they’re there. Pools of tears that threaten to spill. Inhaling deeply, she somehow fends them off.

  “Tell me why you did it, Reece. I need to know.”

  My stomach knots, twisting and turning.

  “Rachel, it’s in the past let’s not go there.”

  “Reece, earlier you said you wanted to know everything. Well, I do too. I deserve to know everything. What happened? What decision did you have to make? What did you choose over me?”

  Fuck.

  I wondered if this day would ever come.

  I hoped it wouldn’t.

  “Rach, maybe we just let it stay in the past.”

  “Listen, it can’t be worse than finding out that my dad is a lying, cheating criminal. Any Pollyanna fantasies I may have had about life are long gone, Reece.”

  Her eyes are pleading with me. Asking why she wasn’t enough. Asking what could have been more important than our love. Why I took her innocence only to shatter her heart two days later. The fact that she’s measuring the level of pain I may cause her by telling her the pain her dad has caused her and her family is one reason I think now is the time to tell her while at the same time the reason I don’t know how I can.

  When her fingers find mine in the dark and tangle our bodies together along with our souls in this tiny gesture, I know the time has come. I pull my back away from the wall and cross my legs sitting in front of her. I reach for both of her hands and she lets me take them. Looking down in the dark where I know our hands hold on to each other, both scared and trying to find strength in the other.