His First Choice

by Tara Taylor Quinn

  “Not physically,” he said. “At least, not like I’ve been reading about. She doesn’t hit him. At all. I asked him over and over. He swears his mother has never so much as slapped him on the bottom.”

  “And you believe him.” She could only be a friend. After having slept with Jem, she was the furthest thing from impartial when it came to his ex-wife.

  “I do.”

  Problem was, she didn’t completely trust his judgment on the subject, either. Most particularly after the way he’d made excuses for the other woman after her despicable behavior the previous week.

  He told her about Levi flailing around in his sleep and hitting Tressa in the face with his cast when she was trying to wake him up from his nightmare. About her losing it and shaking him. About him almost drowning and then her forcing him to learn how to hold his breath underwater.

  “What about the broken arm?” she asked.

  “Levi wasn’t really climbing up the bookcase. His mother had him up on the counter trying to wipe his nose and he wasn’t letting her. She grabbed his arm, meaning to haul him toward her and get him in a clamp-hold, but she pulled too roughly and he fell off the counter.”

  “You’ve spoken to her, then?”

  “Not yet. I had to talk to you first.”

  The ice around her heart softened. But she knew she couldn’t advise him.

  “Levi told me his version of things. Putting it together with what she’s said and what I know about her, I think I’ve figured out what happened.”

  She wasn’t sure he had. But thought he could have. Still...

  He hadn’t mentioned anything about himself, about Tressa’s misuse of him. To the contrary, he was still justifying her behavior.

  Lacey wasn’t jealous about that. At least not much. She was concerned.

  Jem was never going to be free of the woman’s manipulation unless he could see that what she was doing to him was wrong. Unless he could break away from her hold over him.

  And she was the last person who could have that conversation with him.

  “So what do we do?” he asked.

  The “we” brought tears to her eyes.

  “You need to call Sydney first thing in the morning, Jem. Tell her everything you just told me. She’ll work with you from there.”

  “What do you think she’ll do?”

  “I can only speak as your...person.” She’d tried to say friend, but couldn’t minimize what he’d become in her life. Right or wrong, she was laying claim.

  And giving him to Sydney, too.

  “You consider yourself my...person?”

  For the first time since she’d answered the phone, that certain tone was in his voice. Her body reacted immediately.

  And she wondered what that said about her.

  “I do.” For now.

  “Good. Because I consider myself your...person, too.”

  She felt kind of stupid sitting there alone, grinning through tears.

  “So...as my...person, can you give me a bit of practical insight as to what I might be in for when I make my call in the morning? Should I take Levi to school first?”

  “Definitely take him to school, and leave strict instructions that he isn’t to be released to his mother’s care.”

  “Can I do that without a court order?”

  “Yes, because you’re the primary custodial parent. She can challenge it, but then they’ll either call social services or the police, and either one will protect Levi.”

  “Okay, then what?”

  “Then Sydney will probably want to meet with you. And maybe you and Tressa together. She’ll assess how bad Tressa’s situation is and go from there.”

  “Can you give me some parameters as to what the ‘go from there’ could look like?”

  He was already thinking of ways to help minimize the damage for Tressa. To prevent a tornado from disrupting their lives. She didn’t have to see inside his head to know it. She’d seen it enough times to recognize it. Even just as a...person.

  “She could be required to go through some kind of anger management course before she’s allowed to see him again. More likely she’ll be required to be assessed by a court-appointed psychiatrist. And will be allowed only supervised visits until the court determines that Levi is safe alone with her.”

  “So they won’t arrest her or anything?”

  “Not if she cooperates...” Lacey broke off, knowing she’d made a mistake. She’d just told an abused husband how to fall prey to his ex-wife’s manipulation. Jem was going to contact Tressa before Sydney had a chance to. She knew it as well as she knew she’d take her next breath.

  Jem was a victim. She’d known that before she slept with him. Before she’d started to fall in love with him.

  She just wasn’t sure how anyone could help him to see it if he was incapable of looking. He hadn’t been able to recognize that his own son was being victimized...

  And if he didn’t see it, he was never going to be free to be in any kind of a committed, one-on-one relationship with anyone. It would always be about appeasing Tressa—hiding things from her, placating her, doing what he had to do to keep the storm at bay.

  It didn’t matter what Jem wanted, what he promised Lacey or how much he might care about her. As long as Tressa had a hold of him, he wasn’t a free man, no matter how much he loved or needed someone else.

  Her heart shriveled in her chest. She didn’t cry out. Or shed any tears at all. Not then. She just...knew.

  “One other thing...” Jem broke into the silence that had fallen.

  “What’s that?”

  “Can you confirm who called in the first place, if I guess it right?”

  “Of course not.”

  “I figured it out.”

  “That’s nice.” She was at work, having a conversation with a stranger. Not a woman lying in a sexy nightie talking to her new lover.

  “I just... I want them to know how much I appreciate what they did,” he said. “I have to be able to thank them, Lacey. Or at least to stress that they did the right thing. So they’ll do it again. Anytime. Every time. For every child. If not for them, I still wouldn’t know, and Levi could have been paying for my ignorance for the rest of his life.”

  She’d been about to tell him that his son would likely have told him eventually, when he got old enough that his anger outgrew his need for security. But, thinking of Jem, of the abuse he’d taken at his sister’s hands, and the fact that she was the only one in the world he’d ever told about that, she kept her mouth shut.

  Levi was a lot like Jem.

  At least she’d been able to help one of them in time.

  * * *

  NO CHARGES WERE being filed against Tressa. Jem was so relieved he wanted to call Lacey immediately and let her know the good news.

  He accepted Tressa’s hug instead, holding her tight because he knew she needed it. He could feel how badly she was shaking. Knew how hard the hearing had been for her. And knew, too, that she was determined to be a mother who was safe for her son.

  Their son.

  It had been three days since he’d first called Sydney. As Lacey had predicted, the social worker had met with him first, at her office. And then she’d met with Tressa. He’d asked if he could be present, and when he’d been told that he could be, he’d called Tressa to let her know they were on their way to her place.

  He’d told her that Levi had had some problems, and the truth had come out. There were no accusations because he knew she hadn’t meant to do any of the things she’d done.

  He’d had an entire night to calm down between his talk with his son and his conversation with Sydney. Even more time before he’d spoken with his ex-wife. Time to assimilate. To get on top of the situation with his son’s best interests
forefront in his mind.

  He’d reassured Tressa that everything was going to be fine. As long as she cooperated. He’d told her that he’d be there with her every step of the way. That they’d get through it together. And that he didn’t hate her.

  But he had. For a few hours.

  Until he’d realized that hating her for something she couldn’t help wasn’t good for anyone. Least of all him. If he allowed that kind of anger and hate to rule his life, he’d turn into his sister, and he wasn’t about to do that.

  No, the way out of this was to get help for Tressa. Sydney had taken statements from both of them. She’d helped Jem file for a court hearing, to amend their custody rights—leaving Tressa with only court supervised visits for now. And finally, three days after the ordeal had begun, it was done.

  “Can I come over tonight?” Tressa asked as she climbed into his truck so he could take her home.

  She’d asked him if he’d drive her to court, and because he thought it in all of their best interests that she be as calm and stable as possible, he’d agreed to do so.

  He probably would have, anyway. It was the decent thing to do, given the circumstances.

  “You know my rule regarding you at my place,” he said, hating to be firm, but he couldn’t go back to having her unexpectedly popping up in his life. And most certainly not now that Lacey was a part of it.

  He hadn’t seen Lacey since Sunday. He’d wanted the cement floor to cure for a week before he started framing her room. And he’d been focused on the mess with Tressa. But he’d talked to her every night, lying in his bed while she lay in hers. Her voice had been the last thing he’d heard before sleep. Four nights in a row now.

  He figured that was long enough to form an addiction...

  “But I want to see him, Jem,” Tressa said now, her voice getting wobbly. “You’ve already said you’re working this weekend and I can’t have him at my place without making prior plans so someone from social services can be there. And Sydney said Thursday’s too late to make those plans, at least this week, because the Santa Raquel office is so small and everyone is busy...”

  He could feel the storm brewing. It was only noon. Levi’s doctor’s appointment for cast removal was at 1:00 p.m. If all went well, they’d be done by 2:00 p.m. Which gave him three hours before his date with Lacey.

  Kacey was leaving on Saturday and had been asking for more Levi time before she left. She had a cast off party all planned for him.

  “How about if I bring him by your place as soon as he gets his cast off?” Jem improvised. He wasn’t going to have Tressa in episodic mode ruining the evening he had planned. “You can be the first to celebrate with him.”

  Maybe they could turn the broken-arm moment with Levi’s mother into something healthy. “It would be a good chance for you to apologize to him.” Sydney had stressed that Tressa had some damage to undo with her son. Starting with acknowledging that she’d been the one who’d been bad, not him, and assuring him that no one was ever going to do anything to take him away from his father.

  “Okay.” Tressa sat back, her head against the seat, watching the traffic in front of them. “I don’t deserve you, Jem.”

  She didn’t have him, either. Not anymore.

  “But I’m thankful for you. I want you to know that. You really had my back this week.”

  “I know how hard you try to be a good mother to our son.”

  “I do, you know.” She turned to look at him. “I love him more than life.”

  He nodded, understanding completely.

  “You know what bothered me the most?” she mused, looking out the window again.

  “What?” He was mildly curious. Mostly he just wanted to drop her off so he could call Lacey.

  “The thought that our son would grow up and know that his mother had been thrown in jail for hurting him. I know how that feels, Jem, what it does to a person. You spend your whole life fearing that you’re going to be just like them, because, after all, you have their genes.”

  Both of her parents had been arrested for abuse. Against each other. On different occasions. Several years apart. They’d each spent a night in jail while the other was at home with the kids. And then been released when the other refused to press charges. They’d never lost custody of their kids.

  “I’m going to do all of the counseling, and then some, Jem. I’m going to get this right.” Tressa sat up and turned to face him. “I will not let my mom and dad win this one.”

  It was one of the sanest things he’d heard her say in a long time.

  And he breathed a sigh of relief.

  It had taken the week from hell, the threat of losing her son and possibly going to jail, but Tressa had finally seen the truth. They’d turned the corner.

  Maybe, months down the road, after counseling, he’d be able to introduce her to Lacey and they could all be friends.

  Today was proof that miracles did happen.

  CHAPTER TWENTY-NINE

  IT HAD BEEN one of the hardest weeks of Lacey’s life. To finally find someone who really valued her above anyone, and then have him be in the trance of someone else... It was too cruel even for her paranoia to conjure up.

  But her most acute pain wasn’t even for herself. It was for Jem. A man in a million. A giver. A truly gentle man who had more strength, physically as well as emotionally, than anyone she’d ever met. And the power of abuse was taking advantage of everything good about him.

  Some days she didn’t ever want him to come face-to-face with the truth. Afraid of how it could change him when he saw how his willingness to do the right thing by Tressa had put him in a position to be manipulated without him even seeing it.

  Other days, she prayed for his release. Not for herself, but because he deserved to be honored and respected, not abused. To be loved and cared for, not...used up.

  Thank God for Kacey. Her sister had spent the night in Lacey’s bed with her one night, sitting up and watching old movies until Lacey had finally fallen asleep. Every night after work, she’d dragged Lacey around to choose furniture for her new room. To dinner at the new Mexican place by the water.

  They walked on the beach and stopped at an outdoor pub to have drinks and talk about the good old days. Lacey had been surprised to find out how many of them there really had been. That had been the previous night. They’d stayed to listen to the first set played by the band that had shown up at nine, too. And still, Jem had just been finishing with Tressa when he’d called and found Lacey already in bed.

  They’d been preparing for the emergency custodial court hearing that had been set for that morning.

  It was after noon and she still hadn’t heard how it had gone. It was way too early for anything to be on public record. The judge wouldn’t even have had time to give his minutes to the court recorder for filing.

  And knowing that she and Sydney couldn’t discuss the case, knowing, too, that Sydney knew now that Lacey’s personal involvement was more than just casual, she’d steered clear of her colleague by taking herself out of the office to make well-check visits.

  She was almost back to the office, planning on having the salad Kacey had packed her for lunch before an afternoon hearing, when her car’s speaker bleeped announcing an incoming call. Glancing at her radio dash, she saw Jem’s number on the screen and pushed the button on her steering wheel to answer.

  “Thank God you answered.” She could hear the adrenaline in his voice. “I was afraid I was going to have to settle for voice mail.”

  “I’ve been watching the clock,” she said. “Waiting to hear.” She hoped to God she didn’t sound peevish. She didn’t feel it; she just...missed him.

  “I’ve got full custody.” He told her the most important fact first.

  “I knew you would, but what a relief to hear that it’s done,�
� she told him, only then realizing that she’d been holding her emotional breath on that one. Regardless of how the world was changing, courts still oftentimes tended to rule in favor of the mother, and Lacey knew how likable and convincing Tressa could be. Hell, she’d found herself thinking she and the woman could almost be friends the first time they’d met.

  “Tressa was ordered into anger management if she wants a chance to earn back her rights. And she was granted supervised visits.”

  “No charges were filed against her for child abuse?”

  “It was like you said—there wasn’t enough there to prove anything. Because, really, in each incident, an accident was involved.”

  And he was justifying. Holding your child underwater to force him to hold his breath, leaving bruises on his torso as you did so, was definitely actionable.

  But Jem was right. It would be Tressa’s word against that of a four-year-old. One who remembers having a great time playing basketball with his mother in the pool after he learned to swim. And who also remembered misbehaving, almost drowning and having his mother save him.

  “So...we’re still good for tonight?”

  It wasn’t until he asked the question that she admitted to herself she’d been half expecting him to cancel. Because Tressa would surely need him, after the trauma of the day’s events.

  It fit her MO. Unless, maybe Amelia would be around. The real estate attorney had been in LA all week, arguing a case for a brokerage company.

  “Of course we’re still good,” Lacey told him, and had to add, “I’ve missed you. A lot.” Because it was so true.

  “I’ve missed you, too, babe. You have no idea how much.”

  She had an inkling. Evidence pointed to the fact that she wasn’t the only one who’d fallen hard here. She wanted to believe that.

  She just wasn’t sure how she fought the demon that was threatening to keep them from ever sharing a true partnership.

  * * *

  JEM DID SOME double takes over the next couple of weeks, finding it hard to believe that life had finally become what he’d always believed it could be. Kacey was back in Beverly Hills, back at work, but she came to Santa Raquel both weekends. They’d all have dinner together as a family on the Friday nights—both times at Uncle Bob’s at Levi’s request.