What was worse was how close she’d come to asking him to tie her up.
As long as she could remember, she’d wanted to experiment with BDSM, but she’d never had a partner willing to explore with her. Jacob, on the other hand, had read her accurately, and she had no doubt he was capable of giving her everything she desired.
Yet he was the one man she dared not play with. It would lead to nothing other than heartache.
The craziness of the situation would be over soon, maybe in a few days. She’d go back to her life. No way could she become attached either physically or emotionally to another former military man who operated in the shadows.
But still, no matter how hard she tried to shove aside thoughts of last night or the stupidity of finishing what had started in his bedroom, the stronger and more tantalizing they became.
Frustrated, she flipped onto her stomach.
Despite her efforts to control her runaway fantasies, she imagined he actually had kept her in his room and tied her to his massive bed.
First, he would strip off her clothes and trail his fingers across her needy body. Once she was aroused, he’d pick her up and place her on the mattress. Then he’d exert his masculine dominance, securing her with ropes while she writhed, captured, unable to escape his sexual determination.
She’d gasp when he played with her pussy, and she’d silently beg him to take her. And when he did, it would be as powerful as a storm.
The pictures flashing like strobe lights through her brain made her clit throb.
She needed to orgasm.
Maybe that would put a stop to the stampede of impossible, tempting thoughts. Surrendering, just for the moment, she reached a hand beneath her pelvis and pressed against her clit.
She moaned into the pillow.
Then all of a sudden she was lost…in a fever of arousal, grinding her hips, seeking release. Elissa slipped two fingers inside herself, wishing instead that it was Jacob’s massive cock filling her.
Faster and faster, she moved, thinking about the sight of him holding his belt, the leather tantalizing.
Within moments, she climaxed, screaming his name, praying he didn’t hear her.
For moments afterward, she lay there, her breaths disjointed as she labored to return to reality.
The climax had been as swift as it was powerful. But shockingly, she was still thinking about Jacob.
What’s wrong with me?
Elissa didn’t masturbate often, and when she did, she was generally satisfied for days, maybe even a week. This internal hunger for a specific man was new. And she didn’t like it. She wasn’t the type of woman to think about sex all the time. Or, rather, she hadn’t been until the cowboy uprooted her life.
Determinedly she punched her pillow into a different shape while telling herself to focus on something else. Like work. That was always her favorite refuge. She had to decide on the colors and fonts to communicate her client’s brand. He was a motivational speaker, and she wanted something engaging, a bit bold to reflect his personality, but it also needed to invite trust. Meeting planners had to be confident when booking him.
In the distance, a door closed.
Did that mean Jacob had left the house?
If so, maybe it was safe to get her tea so she could hurry back to the sanctuary of her room.
Seizing the opportunity, she turned over, then climbed out of bed.
After pulling on a pair of leggings but not changing out of his T-shirt, she headed downstairs only to freeze once she reached the kitchen.
Jacob was there, leaning against the countertop, a mug in hand. He wore a skimpy pair of swim trunks and nothing else. His short hair was wet and slicked back, while droplets of water clung to his broad chest.
As she watched, fascinated, unable to look away, one arrowed downward, stopping right above his waistband.
The man was a living Adonis.
Every muscle was chiseled, and he didn’t carry an ounce of fat anywhere. Numerous scars attested to his rough life, feeding her curiosity. As crazy as it was, she hungered to know everything about him.
“Morning.”
She looked up and met his gaze, flushing when she realized she’d been caught staring at him.
As if they shared a secret, he smiled, making him even more lethal to her senses.
She would have dressed properly before coming down if she’d realized he was in the house. Self-conscious, hyperaware of his masculinity, she cleared her throat before pulling back her shoulders and pretending that this was a common experience.
“Did I wake you up?”
“No. I mean, not really. I heard a door close. I thought you’d left.”
“Spent a few minutes in the hot tub, then had a swim.”
She tucked wayward strands of hair behind her ears. Being in intimate quarters with a captor, especially after a sizzling kiss, was a new experience, and she had no idea how to act. She thought fast, struggling for some sort of normalcy. “I need to get some work done.” If that was even possible.
“Can I get you a cup of coffee first? It’s fresh.”
“Tempting. But I was thinking about tea this morning.” Besides, the stainless-steel carafe was on the counter next to him, and she didn’t want to get that close.
“There should be some in the pantry.”
The shelves were well stocked, including numerous boxes of tea, and she went straight for the Earl Grey. “Yesterday, you mentioned I have a new computer here?”
“Ready to set up anywhere you wish. You could share my office.”
“Uh…” She frantically thought. “The kitchen table would be fine.”
“There’s an apartment above the garage. Originally it was a stable and bunkhouse, but I had it converted. It has great light. There’s even a small kitchen and a desk. You might enjoy the space and feel like you have a little freedom.”
A small mercy. “You mean I don’t have to stay in the house with you all day?” Because she wasn’t sure she could survive that.
“Of course not. I want you to be comfortable.”
“As if.”
He inclined his head in acknowledgment. “As much as possible, then.” He took a drink. “You’ll find an internet connection throughout the property, so you can work almost anywhere. The hot tub and pool are at your disposal as well.”
“I didn’t see a swimsuit in the box.”
“You don’t need one.”
She notched up her chin. “I don’t skinny-dip.”
“Pity.”
The atmosphere crackled around her, supercharged, like the moment right before lightning struck.
It was then that she noticed his trunks were dry. That meant either he’d changed—which was unlikely—or he’d put them on after he exited the pool. Had he been prowling around outside naked?
Heaven help me. There was no way she would ever get that image out of her mind.
“You can always wear a bra and panties, if your modesty matters.”
Not that he’d packed any underwear that covered much. He’d skipped briefs in favor of thongs and boy shorts.
“The housekeeper isn’t here today, and none of the ranch hands will head this direction without my prior approval. Hawkeye has a few agents stationed nearby, but your privacy will always be respected.” He refilled his mug. “For the moment, it’s just the two of us.”
Just the two of us. His words unnerved her. Was there anything more dangerous to her senses? “Thank you for the offer, but I’ll keep my clothes on.”
His quick grin disarmed her.
How many dimensions were there to this man?
“Can I get you some breakfast?”
“Uhm…”
“I want to make sure I meet all your basic needs.”
She blinked. Were they talking about food?
“Thought I’d treat you to my specialty. French toast stuffed with cream cheese and covered with strawberry topping.”
On cue, her stomach grumbled. “If you’re serious, yes. P
lease.” In the mornings, Elissa generally grabbed a bagel. It required no effort, and she could eat at her desk while reading her emails and catching up on the news. “Is there anything I can do to help?”
“Just worry about your tea. Not one of my specialties.”
Since she was helping out at the pub and had recently been spending her time serving others, having someone take care of her needs was the ultimate luxury.
While he whipped up some eggs and added sugar and vanilla along with a generous shake of cinnamon, she placed a cup of water in the microwave to heat up. She was careful not to bump into him, something that wasn’t easy. His movements were efficient, but he was so large that he dwarfed the space.
Once her beverage was ready, she carried the cup to the far side of the island and slid onto one of the stools. This far apart, with an expanse of marble separating them, she shouldn’t be aware of his every motion. Yet she knew exactly what he was doing, even without looking, as if her senses were supercharged.
He turned on two burners and straddled them with a griddle.
“Are you sure there’s nothing I can do? Set the table, maybe?”
“That would be great. I thought we might eat on the patio. It’s nice enough.”
He told her where to find everything, and she once again took care to skirt by him without touching. With everything gathered on a tray, she fled from the house and her dangerous desire for him.
Outside, she released a breath, not just because she was away from him, but also because of the endless vista and the warmth of the sun on her bare skin.
The sky was a stunning shade of bright blue, and only a few wispy clouds floated by. The flagstones beneath her bare feet were warmer than she expected for so early in the summer. Numerous lounge chairs were scattered in various groupings and accented by huge potted plants and trees. Off to one side was a stone firepit with wicker furniture in front of it.
After arranging plates and silverware on the metal table, she made another trip for their beverages, and a final one for the strawberry topping. Then, since he was still cooking, she walked toward the gazebo at the edge of the patio. The lightest hint of a breeze stirred the late-morning air.
Her initial impression of the ranch hadn’t prepared her for the actual experience of breathing in fresh Rocky Mountain air. In the distance, a single mountain dominated the landscape. Because she lived in suburban Denver, she rarely glimpsed an unobstructed view of anything. The landscape beckoned, making her want to explore her surroundings.
Just as quickly as the idea occurred to her, she shoved it away. Being here was temporary, and she’d never have the opportunity to return.
Inside the house, dishes clattered, signaling that Jacob was wrapping up, and she wandered to the pool area. The water rippled and reflected sunlight, making her wish he actually had packed a swimsuit for her.
When she reached the hot tub, she was unable to resist temptation, and she crouched to dip her hand into the warmth.
“You sure you don’t want to get in?” he shouted from the back door.
And have him watch me walk around naked? “No.” Maybe.
Her heart fluttering again, she met him at the table and sat down across from him. In addition to the French toast, he’d brought out a bottle of pure maple syrup and a platter of bacon. He was a man after her heart.
The meal was prepared perfectly. The bread had exactly the right amount of batter, and it was golden brown. A hint of the filling peeked out around the edges. “Looks amazing.” She filled her plate, then took a bite and sighed. “Do you treat all your captives this well?”
“I prefer the term client. Or protectee.” He snapped his fingers. “Wait. As I said before, guest is even better. It makes a difference to your experience. Therefore, service matters, which you know all about since your family is in the hospitality industry. We’re hoping you’ll leave Hawkeye a good review online and recommend us to your friends and family.”
At his absurdity, she couldn’t help but grin.
“I’m hoping you’ll give us five stars for the Morning Star Suite here at the Starlight Mountain Ranch. I trust the bed is comfortable enough?”
Seduced by the meal, his smile, the surroundings, and his banter, she played along. “Definitely. Exceeded my expectations.” Which was true. “The fluffy robe is a nice touch. If I take it home, can you add the cost to my bill?”
“It’s complimentary with every five-day stay.”
How different would the experience be if she really were his guest here? Everything about the place was spectacular. Over the years, she’d paid a lot of money to relax and recharge at nearby lodges and spas, but she’d never had any of them to herself.
As they ate, he informed her the distant peak was named Saddle Mountain. Then he gave her the history of the ranch, including the struggles each generation had gone through to hold on to it.
“Ranching isn’t easy. And the world isn’t either. My great-grandparents lost their only son in a war. There are challenges with fluctuating beef prices, drought, fights over water rights. Weather. Always the weather. One thing my grandfather was interested in was cross-breeding. Our cattle can survive the harshest winters and terrain. Because of that, we sell them all over the country, including Montana and Wyoming.”
“I didn’t even know that was a thing.”
“It took us years to get it where it is now. Still a long way to go. But his foresight has been the thing that has helped us hold on to the property.”
She sipped from her now cool tea. “You love it here.”
Before answering, he looked into the distance. “I didn’t always.” He pushed his empty plate aside. “It took being gone to appreciate my roots.”
“Did you leave to work with Hawkeye?”
A red-tailed hawk screeched in the sky, then soared on a thermal.
“No. Much earlier than that. I joined the military right after college.”
“So that’s where the two of you met?”
“Yeah.” He faced her again. “In another lifetime.”
“Sometimes I think he never came back.”
Jacob inclined his head to one side, watching her carefully. “You’ve known him a long time.”
“No. I mean… As the calendar goes, yes. Years. But I don’t know him at all.” She shook her head. “For a little while, I thought maybe I did. Then one day he was gone. And I mean that literally. I saw him almost every day, and then…nothing.”
Jacob fixed her with his intense gaze. “You were hurt?”
“Of course.” A little lost. Bereft, but more than anything, confused. She’d become accustomed to Hawkeye coming into the pub late every afternoon. He’d spend hours there, staying until well after dark. They enjoyed deep conversation, and he’d taken her out for dinner on a couple of occasions. One moonless evening, after he’d walked her home, they shared a meaningful kiss on her front porch. She’d gone to bed wondering if their relationship would develop into something more substantial.
She never expected he’d leave without saying goodbye. Less than a week later, he called to say he was no longer in the state and had no plans to return. “I thought we were friends, but the truth was, he’d never let me in. He never mentioned his family or his life before the military. I know something happened in…” She paused, wondering if he’d fill in the details. “Peru or Ecuador, if I recall.”
“Close enough.”
So Jacob knew. Or he’d been there as well. “It was as if he’d been at the pub physically, but somewhere else mentally.”
“Yeah.”
Jacob was slightly different. Just as strong. Rugged. Dangerous. But last night there’d been heat in his eyes. There’d been emotion in his voice when he commanded her to leave. It made him more complex, a little more human.
“He’s worried about you.” He steepled his index fingers. “Clearly you mean something to him.”
She hesitated before replying. “Are you fishing for information, Jacob?”
Elissa sucked in a shallow breath. Asking about her entanglements indicated either a natural curiosity or something more. Since they’d kissed, she was willing to bet he wanted to be sure her relationship with his friend wouldn’t come between them. Finally she exhaled. “To be honest, nothing other than friendship. When we met, I wondered if there might be something more.” She shook her head. “There wasn’t.”
Because he allowed the silence to engulf them, she was compelled to continue. “That’s why I’m frustrated by this whole thing. You know, the way you abducted me and—”
He winced, and she stopped talking.
“You’ve mentioned that once or twice.”
“All I’m trying to say is that Hawkeye shouldn’t be concerned for my well-being at all. No one really knew about us—not that there ever was an us.” She shrugged. “You have to admit I have a point, though. Right? He’s overreacting.” She expected to garner sympathy or at least understanding. Instead, Jacob’s features hardened, and shards of jade shot through his eyes.
“Hawkeye doesn’t take chances with people who matter to him.”
“God, Jacob. Have you listened to a single word I’ve said? I don’t matter to him, and I never did.”
“Someone may believe differently. And that’s the only thing that matters.”
With a clatter, she put her cup down. The conversation was going nowhere. Jacob was loyal to his friend rather than to her.
“I have my orders.”
Like a good military man, he would follow them. Why had she hoped for anything different?
After a long pause, he finally spoke. “How much do you know about what’s going on?”
“Nothing. Absolutely nothing.” She exhaled her frustration. “I’m struggling with all this drama. In my place, would you take it seriously?”
“He has a right-hand woman.” His tone was measured, as if deciding how much information to divulge.
“Are you talking about Ms. Inamorata?”
“So you do know her?”
Elissa desperately wanted to yank back her words. “You miss nothing.”
“My life, and those of others, has depended on it.”
“I swear to you, it’s been a long time since I’ve seen Hawkeye.” It was important to her that Jacob understood completely.
Hold On To Me (Hawkeye Book 4) Page 5