Heart's Betrayal

by Angel Rose

  “Jenesis! Run! Run! To the room!”

  I tried to crawl to the room as quickly as I could, using my elbows to drag my body across the cold hardwood floor. My back felt as if it were broken. I hauled my legs and used my elbows as crutches to get me to the room as quickly as possible. I cried and shook as I wiped my bloody nose with my sleeve. I lifted my head, saw the phone near the bed on the night table, and I crawled over to grab it. I stopped for a moment to catch my breath. My body was shuddering, and my hands were trembling. I was so nervous my fingers couldn’t even dial 911. I wiped my eyes and then my nose with the blanket on the bed, then crawled back to lock the bedroom door. My heart was beating so hard that I lost my breath. All I could here was the furniture being thrown around and muffled voices. I laid down on my side near the door, the pain in my back was excruciating. I dialed 911. “911, how may I direct your call?”

  “Help me…there’s a man in my apartment.” I whispered as I began hyperventilating, “he’s in my house… and…he… tried to…to… kill me. I’m… pregnant! Hurry! I’m hurt! Hurry!” I broke down hysterically as I felt the warm liquid between my legs spurting out of me.

  “Ma’am, are you hurt? Are you bleeding? We are sending the ambulance and a police car right now, is he armed?” I placed my hand between my legs, and I was bleeding.

  “Oh my God! I’m bleeding! I’m bleeding! Just hurry! Please, hurry!” I yelled as I dropped the phone. I must have fainted.

  I woke up to a massive headache and agonizing pain all over my body. I could barely open my eyes. They were so swollen from the punches I endured.

  “Jenesis, are you all right? Jenesis, talk to me!” Someone asked frantically.

  “Michael?” I whispered opening one eye and seeing a blurred vision of Steve, my neighbor.

  “Ma’am we are going to put this neck brace on you, don’t move.” The EMS worker said.

  “Michael?” I grabbed the EMS worker by his arm with my hand and began to cry.

  “You’re okay, Ma’am. You’re okay…who’s Michael?” He took my hand and held it gently.

  “My husband.” I tried to open my eyes as my tears slid down my face, but they were swelling by the second.

  “Ok, we’ll call him, Michael, right?” he whispered softly.

  “Yes…my cell phone.” I looked over at Steve.

  “I’ll call him.”

  “Ok, I’m going to put him on speaker phone so you can hear his voice, ok?” The phone rang. “Is this Michael?” The EMS worker asked.

  “No, who’s this?” I heard Dave say.

  “My name is Christian, I’m an EMS worker, and I’m looking for Michael. His wife’s been assaulted. She responding right now to us, but she’s beat up pretty badly and she’s bleeding. We are taking her to New York hospital.”

  “What! Oh my God! Michael, it’s Jenesis, she’s hurt!” he shouted. My head was spinning and I held my stomach.

  “We have to take her to the hospital right away, she’s pregnant and she’s bleeding, are you aware of that?”

  “Yes, of course, she’s my wife.” he said as his voice trembled.

  “Why was she alone?” Christian asked.

  “What? Why are you asking me that? Can I please speak to my wife please? Put my wife on the phone!” he yelled. My heart began to beat faster. I was so nervous hearing him yell on the phone that I began to cry hysterically.

  “You’re upsetting your wife sir, we are on speaker phone right now, and sir, you’re not helping. We’re leaving now. Meet your wife at the hospital.” Christian hung up the phone on him as he shook his head.

  They lifted my head to put on a neck brace and I felt every bone in my body crack. I didn’t feel the baby fluttering around and I panicked. My cries turned into loud sobs and I grabbed Christian’s arm.

  “You’re okay…I promise you’re going to be okay.” Christian held my hand tightly and smiled.

  Steve tried to console me the whole ride to the hospital. As they placed an IV in my arm, I closed my eyes and gripped Steve’s hand. They placed pieces of gauze between my legs to soak up the blood. I could still feel the warmth between my legs. I was so scared…scared to lose my baby…again. Christian’s facial expression changed as he placed the gauze between my legs. The look of panic. The look of fear. He seemed more frightened than I was. I squeezed his hand tightly and he didn’t let go.

  “Miss, this belt around your stomach is to listen to the baby’s heartbeat. Do you hear it? Everything is okay. The baby is okay.” Christian reassured me.

  The ride to the hospital seemed like the endless drive from hell. Steve smiled at me, and with his hand he began to wipe my bloody nose with a tissue.

  “Thank you.” I said sobbing as every part of my body was tensing up and I still couldn’t feel my baby. I was falling to pieces, and I was so afraid I would lose him.

  “Shhh, it’s okay. You’re going to be okay.” he said with tears in his eyes.

  We arrived at the hospital and I could see through my swollen eyes Michael and Dave standing at the entrance. Michael ran to me.

  “Jenesis! Jenesis! Jesus Christ! What happened?” Michael yelled hysterically.

  “Sir, let us get her in the emergency room.” Christian said seriously.

  “Jenesis! I’ll be right here!” he yelled.

  “Michael, she’s going to be okay.” I heard Dave say to Michael.

  They wheeled me into the emergency room and I could see the white fluorescent lights above my head. They blinded my engorged eyes as they pushed me down the hallway on the stretcher. Everything seemed to be happening so quickly, and I had so many doctors talking to me all at once. I didn’t have the strength to answer them. I was just worried about the baby and looking for Michael. The nurse was cleaning up my nose, sticking in gauze in places it didn’t seem to fit. Doctor’s were spreading my legs to stop the bleeding. The pain was unbearable in every direction. I could hear another doctor requesting x-rays of my back, then another one for my nose. I didn’t give a damn about myself. I wanted to know if my baby was okay. Michael finally walked into the room.

  “Jenesis!” Michael yelled as he pushed the nurse out of the way. Security ran in to stop him.

  “Michael, calm down!” Dave shouted as he grabbed him from behind. Michael pushed Dave away and ran to me and grabbed my hand.

  “Jenesis, please, please tell me you’re okay, please…the baby?” he said as he kissed my hand and started to cry. I looked over at Dave and saw him trying to calm the security guard down. Steve was talking to the doctors then the police came and he walked out. The pain medication started to kick in slowly through the IV. My eyes were so enflamed I could hardly see Michael or anyone else. I was worried about the baby and the drugs.

  “Mrs. Hunter, this pain medication is going to make you and the baby groggy, the baby may not move for a while. Don’t worry, it won’t harm the baby.”

  “But the baby’s not moving now, please I need to feel my baby move, please!” I cried.

  “You’re early in your pregnancy. You’ll only feel a flutter or so.”

  “Don’t tell me what I feel! I know he’s in there! I know it!” I yelled. “I don’t feel him…I don’t feel him, please. Please help me!” I was borderline hysterical at that point. Michael grabbed me by the shoulders. I started feeling light headed and dizzy. My vision was blurry, and I began to feel really sleepy. Soon everything that happened started to flash before my eyes. All I saw was that bastard punching me in the face and kicking me on my back. I started to panic. I wanted to get up and walk around and the nurses asked me to sit down and relax.

  “Mrs. Hunter, we know you’re upset, but you have to lie down or you’ll get dizzy from the medication and fall.” The nurse said to me.

  “Can I speak to you outside?” Michael asked the nurse, and from the look on his face, he seemed worried and didn’t want to speak in front of me.

  “Mrs. Hunter, we have to do an internal sonogram to check if the baby is okay. Please
lay back and relax, spread your legs apart and try to relax. Nurse, please come in, shut the door and close the curtains.”

  “Hello, I’m Dr. Cook, we’re going to check the baby. The heartbeat was very weak in the ambulance. We’ve noticed tissue in the blood that you lost. We need to make sure you did not have a miscarriage. Take a deep breath and relax.” I instantly tightened up. My baby…my baby…please God…don’t punish me like this. They placed the probe inside of me after they did the external sonogram. By the look on the doctor’s face…I knew…I lost my baby.

  “Where is your husband?” Dr. Cook asked. My heart sank into my stomach.

  “Please don’t tell him, please. I think he would die.” I whispered.

  “I’m sorry. We have to tell him.” She said compassionately. The nurse walked out and Michael walked in and sat next to me.

  “Mr. and Mrs. Hunter, I’m very sorry. You did have a miscarriage. I’m so very sorry. We’ll have to do a procedure though. You’ll be asleep. Please try to relax.” Those words shocked me…not again…not again. I felt nauseated and turned to the side of the bed and threw up. Michael stood up and stormed out of the room. The doctor called in the nurse. They started to speak and I couldn’t hear what anyone was saying. I was in my own world remembering when my father beat my mother so badly when she told him that she was pregnant. She stood on the bathroom floor bleeding.

  “You think I want another kid!” He yelled kicking her in her stomach. I was thirteen years old and had walked in from school to find her on the bathroom floor bleeding from her mouth and in between her legs. He kicked her hard, and I remember running to her and dropping to my knees on the floor beside her. Her skirt was drenched with blood and the red streaks were running down her thighs.

  “Bobby…please…no more.” she begged him as she started to lose consciousness. I looked up at my father, my insides shaking. I didn’t know if he was going to hit me. He stood there, staring at me with those eyes, cold and empty.

  “Call an ambulance…don’t forget to say she fell down the stairs…go…by the way…why would I have another one like you?” I glanced up at my father as those words cut into me like a knife in my heart. He stared at me deeply…and in that moment, just for that moment, his eyes told a different story…HE WAS SORRY. His eyes welled up, then he walked away from me. I dialed 911 from my cell phone and kissed my mother tenderly on her forehead.

  “My mother is hurt, please hurry…5 Bryant lane…hurry!” I said as I grabbed a towel and placed it under the faucet. She began to cry as I wiped her face with the wet towel, and placed another towel between her legs.

  “We have to leave mom, please, we have to leave…One day he’s going to kill you…on purpose or by accident…either way, you’re going to die…then I’ll die with you.” I whispered as she closed her eyes.

  “Mrs. Hunter, I’m so sorry. Let me call someone to clean this up. I’ll get you a toothbrush so you can brush your teeth and some water to rinse your mouth. They might call someone to speak with you to help you get through this ordeal. Your husband really needs to calm down or they’re going ask him to him to leave.” I gaped at her as my body trembled. I’ve been punished and I paid the price for even having a thought of killing my baby. Now we’re even. One soul for another. Now…I want to die. Please take me God…take me.

  They rolled the stretcher into another room and gave me another sedative. I was groggy and thinking only the worst. The procedure was painless but seemed like it took a lifetime. I just didn’t want to wake up anymore. I just wanted to close my eyes…and die.

  ***

  I woke up from the procedure feeling confused, nervous and sobbing into my hands. I didn’t know what to do. I heard Michael yelling.

  “Are you going to help her? She’s a wreck!” he shouted.

  “Sir, we are. We’re going to call the psychiatrist on call. She’ll be down here soon, please calm down. Go to the cafeteria and get a bite to eat and relax. Let us deal with your wife. You can come back in hour or so.” someone said politely to him.

  “That’s my wife in there! Not yours, I just lost my son! This is the second child we’ve lost. Don’t you get that? What kind of doctor are you? Are you telling me to leave my wife when she needs me the most! I want to see her now! Now!” his screaming voice filled the hallway hospital.

  “Look, it’s what’s best for her right now, please, go down to the cafeteria, and relax.” the doctor’s voice was harsh.

  “What the hell is going on around here? I have rights...she’s my wife! I. Just. Lost. My. Baby!” he roared ferociously.

  “Sir, calm down.” someone replied.

  “Fuck you! I want to see my wife! Now!” he said blaring. I could hear the anger in his voice and I was afraid for the person he was arguing with.

  “Okay sir, okay, please calm down.” the doctor responded calmly.

  Michael walked into the room and a nurse grabbed him by the arm.

  “Get off me!” He yelled and pushed the nurse away with his hand. The nurse used the phone in the room and called for security. Within seconds, the hospital security guard came into the room and approached Michael.

  “Sir, you have to leave now. Please… come with us!” He reached for Michael.

  “Get the fuck off of me!” He yelled pushing the guard against his chest sending him leaping across the room into the wall. Michael walked over to me and sat by the bed.

  “Michael, I’m scared! Don’t leave me! Don’t leave me!” I said screaming and crying as he held me. He looked over at the nurse and held me tighter.

  “I’m here baby, I’m here, and I’m never going to leave you alone again. It’s my fault you lost the baby. Everything is my fault. Margaret, you, the baby, the other baby…everything…I’m being punished Jenesis…I’m a worthless piece of shit. I knew I should’ve stayed away from you. I could only do harm…harm.” He whispered in my ear. He grabbed me tightly around my shoulders and cried into my hair. The nurse glanced over at the security guard who was dazed, flat on his ass, and leaning against the wall.

  “It’s okay. Let him stay. She’s too hysterical to be left alone with me right now.” She said sarcastically and walked out.

  Michael held me tightly and laid on the bed with me. I had my face nestled in his chest. I didn’t want to see or look at anyone. My eyes hurt me so badly and my nose was still dripping blood. My heart was torn from my body and I wanted to die in his arms. I wanted to throw myself from the roof of the hospital and make sure I felt the pain of my body being cracked in half, and my skull being broken into tiny pieces. I grabbed Michael tighter as I sobbed hysterically into his chest.

  “Baby, please, don’t do this to yourself.” He whispered in my hair.

  I heard the click-clacking of heels walking into the room. I lifted my face slightly from his chest and peeked and saw a woman in a white coat with papers in her hands. I sat up as she approached Michael and me. She had a black skirt suit on and her heels tapped harshly on the cold tiled floor. I squinted through my swollen eyes to see a tall, attractive woman with long blonde wavy hair. I automatically assumed she was the psychiatrist.

  “Mrs. Hunter?” she whispered.

  “Yes.” I answered sniffling.

  “I’m the hospital social worker, Mrs. Gardner.” She said softly. “May I speak with you for a moment?”

  “I don’t think she’s in any condition to speak with you right now.” Michael said abrasively.

  “I understand, Mrs. Hunter, are you all right?” she asked looking at me concerned.

  “No, not at all. I lost my baby…my precious baby.” I choked back my tears. The devastation in my voice was clear.

  “I see, I can come back tomorrow morning, we can talk then, will that be okay?” she asked politely.

  “I don’t understand why she needs to speak to a social worker? She’s devastated right now.” Michael said rudely. He was pissed off.

  “No worries, it’s just standard procedure, Mr. Hunter. I’ll see you in
the morning, Mrs. Hunter, Jenesis, right? Is that with a G?” she asked, smiling, as she scribbled something on her chart.

  “No, J…Yes, in the morning, thank you.” I whispered softly.

  “Thanks, feel better and rest, good night.” she nodded then turned on her heels and walked out of the room.

  Michael stared at her angrily.

  “Yeah, Good night…bitch.”

  Michael and I slept together holding each other tightly during the night. He didn’t leave my sight for a moment; not even to use the bathroom. We were constantly interrupted by nurses asking to draw blood, x-ray technicians asking for x-rays of my back, plastic surgeons for my nose, a psychiatrist intern, an obstetrician and tons of nurse’s aides checking my temperature and blood pressure. It was a fucking calamity. We really didn’t sleep at all, but Michael didn’t let me go. He was so supportive and held my hand through every pinch and stick. I loved him so much, but the guilt-ridden Jenesis was getting what she deserved…and then some. My mother was a God-fearing woman and just the thought of having an abortion was a sin.I couldn’t live with guilt. I just couldn’t.This had to be a punishment.

  Michael stood staring aimlessly out of the window sliding his hand through his silky black hair. He turned around, and glanced over at me as he placed his hands in his jean pockets.

  “I haven’t seen Dave.” I sniveled.

  “He’s been with Steve and the police; they’ll want to get your statement soon; this morning, probably.”

  “My God, I don’t understand, who would want to hurt me Michael, who?” I cringed at the thought.

  “Jesus, Jenesis, it could be anyone.” He shook his head. “I don’t know, I don’t know. All I know is, no one is ever going to hurt you again. We’re moving upstate away from the city, in a house in the woods where no one can get to you.”

  “What? What about my job?” I said positioning myself to sit up straight.