Heart's Betrayal
Page 20
“Jen, we’re never going to be the same, but I promise you, it will be a new beginning for us both. I promise.” I shook my head. There was no way I could be with Michael I thought to myself. But, how would I walk away. How?
CHAPTER 11
I stood staring out of the window with a cup of tea in my hands watching the birds frolic in a little puddle of water near the trees in the park. I watched as they splashed their wings in the water, a battle to the end to see who flap their wings faster. I giggled softly. I heard the door opening as the spring breeze blew in through the window rustling the sheets on the bed. I heard his footsteps and turned around to greet him.
“Hey,” I whispered staring at him from afar.
“Hey, are you okay?” he asked as he removed his suit jacket and hung it up in the closet. I nodded my head then turned around and continued to stare out of the window.
Three months had passed since the tragedy with Dave…and Michael. Sometimes, I imploded internally just thinking about the decision I made to stay with Michael. But, I loved him and there was no denying it. I sometimes think that I’ll never grow out of my insecurities; that I could never be alone because my father branded me as weak.
We found an apartment on the near Central Park, never returning to the house we owned. We sent a packing company over to pick up our belongings minus the phone and the answering machine.
Michael was right, things were never the same, but we were trying to move on. I owed so much to Dr. Logan, without her I…we…wouldn’t have survived. Dr. Logan helped tried to help me as much as she could. This time around. I was angry, bitter and she wasn’t able to break down that wall. It was my defense mechanism, a survival tactic that worked for me. Dave left a lot of questions unanswered and that made me confused and angry. I was wallowing in a pool of sorrow, and I needed help…I was drowning. Even though we took a vow to be friends only, Dr. Logan immediately saw me again as my therapist without hesitation and I was grateful for that.
“Jenesis, I’m so glad you’ve been coming regularly. We’ve been getting a lot accomplished. I’ve noticed you’ve been avoiding the subject though.” she said as she glanced up at me, taking a quick break from writing on her clipboard.
“What subject?” I said knowing very well that she was talking about Dave.
“You know exactly what I’m talking about.” she said sternly.
“I don’t!” I snapped at her.
“Dave, Jenesis, Dave. He’s the only person you haven’t spoken about in the last three months” She crossed her legs as she wrote on her clipboard.
“I…I …can’t talk about him.” I shook my head as my eyes filled with tears. The pain in my heart was excruciating. I couldn’t bear to talk about him. I was sick over it, and no matter what he did to me…no matter how angry and hurt I was, I was afraid because…I still loved him. I was ashamed. I was embarrassed. I didn’t know how to cope.
“Jenesis, you said you haven’t been feeling well. Have you been to the doctor?”
“No. I haven’t been to the doctor…it’s been about two or three months now.”
“Why? What’s going on? You have to take care of yourself. I suggest you go. You might be coming down with something.” She held my hand to comfort me. “You can bring Michael to the next session. It’s time to get the therapy you both need together. Are you sure you’re okay?”
“I don’t know about that. I don’t think I’m ready to have him at the sessions yet. I’d like to leave now, I’m feeling nauseous.” I swallowed hard as the saliva was building up in my mouth.
“Jenesis, please, we can’t move on with your treatment if you don’t discuss how much Dave has hurt you.” She pleaded.
“I have Michael in my life. I’ve forgiven him and I want to move on and forget about Dave.” I lied through my teeth. Staying with Michael was even worst. But I had no one. NO ONE. “I don’t ever want to mention his name again…ever.” I stood up from the chair and walked out of the office.
“You’re only lying to yourself…you’ll never get rid of him like that…never…Jenesis? Jenesis?” she shouted.
I took the elevator to the lobby and walked across the street to the pharmacy. I glanced at the aisle that sold condoms and pregnancy tests. I grabbed a first response test and walked over to the counter to pay for it.
“Sixteen dollars and seven cents.” the cashier said as he threw the pregnancy test in a bag.
“Thanks Miss, and Good Luck.” he said as he stared at me. I looked at him oddly, gawking at his hair that stood sharply above his head in the shape of a Mohawk. I gave him a gentle smile and walked away.
I hailed a cab, got in, and headed home. On the way home, I thought about what Annmarie said, but she didn’t understand. I wasn’t able to talk about Dave…especially not now. The cabby stopped in front of my apartment building. I got out and saw Michael walking in.
“Hey.” I said.
“Hey, you’re home early from therapy.” he slid his hands in his pockets.
“Yeah, I wasn’t feeling it today.” I lowered my head.
“Let’s go upstairs.” He smiled gently.
We walked into the elevator and entered the apartment. Michael went into the bedroom to change his clothes. I walked over to the bathroom, locked the door, and looked in the mirror. It’s now or never, Jenesis, I thought to myself as I stared into the mirror blankly. I pulled down my pants and panties at the same time, tore open the first response test, sat on the toilet, and peed on the stick. I sat patiently as Michael knocked on the door.
“Jen, are you okay?”
“Yeah, I’ll be out in a minute.” I shouted.
I placed the test on the sink and stood leaning against the door. I took a deep breath and glanced over at the test. My heart sank into my stomach. I lowered my head in shame. I never felt so defeated in my life. The stick showed a plus sign. I was pregnant and I didn’t know who the father was. Was it Dave’s or Michael’s? My worst nightmare come true.
I slid down against the bathroom door and held my head between my hands. I felt nauseous and horrified at the same time. What am I going to do? I began to cry holding my stomach and rubbing it gently. Michael knocked on the door startling me.
“I’m sorry.” I whispered. Michael knocked on the door again.
“Are you coming out? Jenesis, is everything okay?”
“Michael, I’m in trouble.” I said softly.
“Jen, open the door. What’s going on?” he said nervously.
“I’m pregnant.” I whispered.
“What?” he said.
“I’m pregnant.” I said placing my cheek against the door as my heart pounded against my chest. I didn’t hear a response from Michael. I lifted myself from the floor and opened the door slowly.
“Michael?”
I walked around the apartment and noticed Michael was gone. I sat on the couch and looked down at my stomach. I gently placed my hand on my belly and rubbed it softly. I inhaled deeply then closed my eyes tightly. There was no way around this. There was no way I was going to have an abortion. NO. WAY.
I took out my cell phone from my purse and sent Dr. Logan a text.
I’m pregnant.
J
Jenesis, congratulations!
AnnMarie
No. Don’t say that. Dave raped me. And days before that happened, I had unprotected sex with Michael. I could be carrying Dave’s child.
J
OMG, Jenesis. What are you going to do?
Annmarie
I don’t know. I don’t know.
J
The End
Thank you reading Book two, Heart’s Betrayal, of the Broken Heart Series. Book three coming soon November 2015.
Jenesis and Michael struggle to stay together, but when the truth comes out about Jenesis’ life, her world is turned upside…again. Michael finds out the truth about the lies his father left behind. Can Michael and Jenesis have their happily ever after, even in the midst of all of this turm
oil?
Read to find out what happens to these broken characters. Will they finally find the happiness they’ve both be longing for? Or will they walk away from each other and never look back?
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About the Author
Born and raised in NYC, Angel Rose resides in Upstate, NY, where she lives with her husband and two children.
She loves to sing, dance, draw and write; sometimes all at the same time! *smiling*
This is her second book as a self-published author. Her passion is writing stories about broken characters, who fall in love, are fighting inner demons, and sometimes they have a happy ending, and sometimes…they don’t.
She loves spending time with her boys and family. She loves nature, minus the pesky bugs. She enjoys a beautiful sunrise and sunset, chocolate ice cream with chocolate sprinkles, chicken fajitas and a nice, ice cold beer.
She wears her heart on her sleeve and will help anyone in need. She loves a good book, a soft pillow, and a throw blanket to snuggle up with.
Thank you for reading!