“Are you sure? That can’t be comfortable.”
“I’ll survive it.” It was either that or throw her on the bed and act on the thoughts that were racing wildly through my mind.
She stood there and stared at me.
I looked back at her. “What is it?”
“Aren’t you going to take the bath?”
“I was hoping to see how you look in the dress first.” There was no way I was going to stand up with her looking at me. I didn’t want her to see how aroused I was. I cleared my throat. “You can put it on in the third bedroom.” Or you can put it on right here.
She blushed. “Oh.” She quickly tightened the top of her robe.
I sighed. I was hoping she wouldn’t remember to do that.
“I’ll be right back,” she said before she left the room.
I jumped off the bed and opened the window so that the fresh, cool air would calm me down. There was no way that the dress would look better than her wearing nothing. She was incredible.
When she returned, she wore the dress. I breathed a sigh of relief. I didn’t think I could handle watching her in her robe anymore.
She ran to the mirror and examined her reflection. “This is a wonderful dress. How did you know my measurements?”
Now that she was fully dressed, I could concentrate again. “That was easy. I took that pink dress you wore at the dance to Mrs. Rhodes.”
“It fits better than that dress.”
“I told her the pink dress was a little tight because you felt faint in it.”
She went to the mirror and combed her hair, which was drying nicely. She placed the bonnet on her head and turned to me. “What do you think?”
“You’re the best looking woman I’ve ever seen,” I whispered.
She beamed. “That is very thoughtful of you to say.” She walked over to me and hugged me. “Thank you. This is the best gift anyone’s ever given me.”
“You had better dresses back in Virginia.” It felt so good to hold her.
“But this took some thought.”
“I know how much you like dresses.”
“Todd, you’re the best husband a woman could ask for. I’m very thankful you love me so well.” She kissed me on the cheek.
I turned my head in hopes she would kiss me on the mouth, but she had already pulled away from me and was admiring the dress in the mirror.
“I think I’ll take that bath now,” I weakly said before I left the room.
Chapter Ten
Ann’s Point of View
I was thankful for the fall season. It was good to feel the cool breezes drift in through the open windows. Early in October, I woke up and realized I had finally forgiven Kent and Rebecca. I was relieved and happy to be able to move on with my life.
Since Todd and I slept in separate bedrooms, I wasn’t aware he had trouble sleeping. How many sleepless nights had he spent pacing in his bedroom or downstairs in the parlor?
I wouldn’t have even known he was having trouble sleeping if I hadn’t gotten cold in the middle of the night and had to close my window. I realized I was thirsty, so I decided to go to the kitchen to get some water. On my way down the steps, I heard the sound of footsteps in the parlor. I gasped and stood still, afraid to move. I held my breath and considered what to do. Suddenly, it occurred to me that an intruder wouldn’t spend so much time in one place.
I slowly walked down the stairs and tiptoed to the sound, curious as to what Todd would be doing up at such a late hour. I was ready to let my presence be known when I saw him, slouched over the desk in the parlor. The candlelight by his side showed his worried expression. I stayed out of sight in the shadows.
He never told me anything was bothering him, so I had no idea what it could be. He sighed loudly, stood up and paced in front of the desk, sat back down in front of a pile of papers, wrote something down, threw his pen down in aggravation and paced the floor again. Obviously, whatever he was writing wasn’t working. Finally, he blew out the candle and walked back up the stairs. I quietly hid in the shadows.
Once he shut his bedroom door, I crept over to the desk and pulled open the drawer that contained the papers he had been scribbling on. I pushed aside my guilty feelings and walked to the window so I could study what was on the papers by the light of the moon. It didn’t take me long to realize that I was holding the household budget. I frowned. We needed more money. I put the papers back where I found them. I didn’t know if I felt better or worse now that I knew what kept him up at night. He wanted to protect me from financial worries, but I was partly responsible since I bought extra food that I wanted to cook. Some of the food was expensive. Plus, he originally planned on coming out by himself, so I was an extra person to care for.
Winter was coming soon, and Barbara recommended that I get warmer clothes, coats and boots. Now I was worried. How could we afford those things? I wanted to help him but didn’t feel comfortable approaching him since he was determined to handle this on his own. That night, I stayed awake, tossing and turning in my bed as I thought of ways I could ease our financial burden. As I cooked breakfast, I found the answer. I would take Mrs. Coley up on her offer to give me food in exchange for my services.
Barbara came by to pick me up later that morning. We went to town once a week so she could visit her mother. Molly usually joined us while Calvin and Bruce helped John. While Barbara and Molly visited her mother, I went to the store.
Mr. Coley was stocking the shelves. “Hello, Mrs. Brothers. How are you and Todd doing this morning?”
“We are doing well, thank you,” I replied.
Mrs. Coley walked out from the backroom. “You’re early. You don’t usually come for another hour.”
I took a deep breath. “Yes. I had something I wanted to ask you.”
Mr. Coley stopped and looked at me.
“Is your offer to help you with the store still open? I would like to work for free food.”
Mrs. Coley thought for a moment. “We could use someone to clean the store, update our books, and keep an inventory list of the supplies we have. Are you willing to do those things?”
I nodded. “I know how to do all of that.” For once, I was grateful for my schooling. “I’m not sure my husband would appreciate it if I worked here. He might not like the fact that I’m helping with the finances.”
“You don’t need to explain,” Mr. Coley replied. “We won’t say a word about this.”
I sighed, relieved. “Thank you.” I didn’t want Todd to feel like he couldn’t make it out here on his own.
So we agreed that I would come in twice a week to do these chores in return for food and cooking supplies. Since Todd didn’t go shopping, he didn’t know the cost of food, so I was able to fib on the cost of different items. I simply explained that I had found ways to cut back on the grocery bill. He accepted my reason for the sudden decrease in food expenses.
After two weeks, I took a midnight peek at the budget and smiled when I saw we were back in good financial shape.
As it turned out, Mrs. Coley and I became good friends. She would fill me in on her past memories, especially funny stories of her children’s childhood. She loved to tell her stories, and I enjoyed listening to them. She also gave me advice on staying warm during the winter. It was funny how I got used to doing the chores at home and in the store. I didn’t even notice how exhausting they were anymore.
***
That Sunday evening, Todd and I sat on the porch, watching the sunset as the wind tossed orange and red leaves on the ground.
“I wish time would stand still at this moment,” he commented. “If only things could always be this peaceful.”
“It is beautiful,” I agreed.
He closed his eyes and leaned his head against the chair. It had been a couple of weeks since he sat next to me on the porch swing. I worried that he no longer loved me like he used to, but I didn’t ask him about it in case I was right.
“I wish tomorrow wasn’t Monday.�
�
I sighed. It seemed that he hated his job more with each passing day. “Try not to think about the bank.”
“I try, really I do. I tell myself once winter is over, I can afford to quit. John’s going to help me purchase farm equipment. He’ll know what I need to get started. He recommends I start planting-”
I bit my lower lip so I wouldn’t scream. Instead, I said, “Todd, I’ve heard this a dozen times already. Can we talk about something else? Maybe you should quit your job at the bank and get another job until spring.” When he didn’t respond, I continued, “There’s an opening at the post office.”
“Do you think I can’t handle the job I already have?” He sat up straight, his eyes wide.
Why did he have to be so touchy? “You’re a great banker. It’s just hard to watch you spend all your waking hours in misery. You might enjoy life more if you did something else for the next few months.”
He frowned. “I don’t know.”
“What do you have to lose?”
“I’ll think about it.”
I hesitated but decided to speak. “There’s not only a job at the post office but the stable is hiring as well.” When I saw him clench his jaw, I realized he wasn’t listening to me. “I’ve had it! I’m tired of hearing you complain about your job. I don’t understand why you don’t quit.” It hadn’t been my intention to raise my voice but the more I spoke, the louder I got.
He glared at me. “Unlike some people, I don’t run away from my problems.”
I bolted to my feet. “That’s the last time I’ll try to help you!” I quickly ran into the house before I said something I would regret.
I locked myself in my bedroom. So what if I left Virginia in order to get away from Kent and Rebecca? Todd didn’t refuse to take me with him! I crossed my arms and sat on my bed. Perhaps leaving Virginia the way I did wasn’t the smartest thing I ever did, but I liked it here. I didn’t regret coming out here, even though I missed my parents and Agnes.
I spent most of the night fuming at his words. Did he think I was staying here because I was still mourning over Kent? Did he think that was the only reason I stayed married to him?
By the time morning came, I was tempted to make Todd fix his own breakfast. I stared at the cook stove. I wondered how long it would take him to figure out how to make pancakes and biscuits.
“I’m sorry, Ann. I didn’t mean to say that about you running away from your problems,” Todd softly stated.
I hadn’t heard him enter the kitchen. I turned around, my heart melting. “I’m sorry too. You know how to handle the situation at work better than I do.”
He seemed as relieved as I was to have things go back to normal. Unlike the other times we apologized, he hugged me. The action startled me for a moment, but then I returned his hug. I found that I enjoyed hugging him. Maybe fighting wasn’t so bad after all.
“You don’t run away from your problems,” he said when our hug ended. “If you did, you wouldn’t be here. I know it wasn’t easy for you to learn to cook and clean. It’s hard work, and I want you to know that I appreciate it. Thank you for taking care of me.”
My eyes lit up at his compliment. I kissed his cheek to show my appreciation. “Of course, you take care of me too.” Again, I was thankful that he loved me and treated me so well. I gladly turned to the stove and made his breakfast.
***
The next afternoon when he came home, he rushed into the house and said he had a surprise for me. Interested, I followed him out to the barn and paused when I saw my gift. He bought me a horse?
“Do you think this is a good idea?”
“Of course it is,” he replied, smiling proudly at the brown animal that was eating hay in her stall. “Do you want to name her?”
“Why do we need another horse?”
“I noticed you’ve been going into town more and thought if I was at work and you needed to go to town, you can hook up Thunder and this horse to the buggy.”
I considered my words carefully. I didn’t work at the Coley’s so he could buy things we didn’t need. “I appreciate the thought. You are very kind to think of me.”
He frowned. “But…?”
I shrugged. “I don’t know. I just think that it may be unnecessary. Barbara takes me into town whenever she goes.”
“I thought you would be pleased.”
I noted his disappointment. “I am but isn’t a horse expensive?”
“Are you saying I can’t afford it?”
“Can you?”
“Yes.”
I rubbed my forehead. I saw the budget that night. I knew he couldn’t. Not really. Not without sacrificing something important, like food or clothes or blankets for the winter.
He sighed and looked at Thunder and Lightning who rested in their stalls, munching on their portion of the hay. He turned back to me. “I work all the time to give you what you want and no matter how hard I try, I can’t please you. I really thought you’d appreciate this horse. I bought her for you.”
“I don’t need a horse.”
“You want more clothes?”
“No. I’m content with what I have.” Why was he getting upset? I was trying to ease his financial burden, not increase it. “You don’t have to buy me things. I don’t need things to be happy. I just want to be a blessing to you.”
He looked as if he was about to say something but decided against it.
I shook my head. “Forget about the Thanksgiving trip and the horse. You don’t have to work overtime at the bank. Do you think I want you to suffer over there just so I can have more things? I already told you I wasn’t going to buy as many clothes anymore and I have managed to cut back on the food expenses. I did all of that for you, but you take the money I have saved you and you run off and buy an animal I don’t need. Then you’re going to run back to the bank and overwork yourself again.”
“I keep telling you we can afford things. Why don’t you ever listen to me?”
He was too proud to admit that he needed help. I couldn’t make him tell me the truth, and I didn’t want to have another fight about his job. I turned to the mare. He did show a great deal of thoughtfulness in buying her for me. I should graciously accept it and just hope it didn’t create a hole in our finances. “Thank you for the horse. I’m sorry I wasn’t appreciative of it before. I do like it when you buy things for me.”
He looked uncertain. “You do?”
I nodded. “It lets me know you think about me.”
He smiled back. “That’s good information to have.”
Relieved, I returned his smile. “Why don’t we name her Storm? I think it goes well with Thunder and Lightning.”
“I like it. Storm it is.”
Chapter Eleven
Todd’s Point of View
One night, I couldn’t sleep at all. Thoughts of Ann continually replayed themselves in my mind. I recalled the day I brought home her dress for her birthday and how beautiful she looked in her robe. I recalled her perky white breasts when she leaned over to touch my forehead. I wanted to see everything that was under that robe. I managed to drift off into a fitful sleep halfway through the night, and my dreams were filled with images of Ann coming to me. My hands caressed her breasts. I recalled the feel of her silky hair, the way her lips felt on mine, and how her body felt when I hugged her. I reluctantly willed these thoughts away as I woke up. I was too aroused to go back to sleep. I jumped off my bed and opened the window.
I shivered as my body finally cooled. I didn’t dare close the window. Instead, I decided to go downstairs. I didn’t feel like taking care of my sexual needs that night. I’d just wait it out. I quietly walked down the stairs and lit a candle in the parlor. I went over to the desk by the window and opened the top drawer where I put the papers I wrote on to plan our spending and savings. I took out my pencil and began working on a new idea on ways I could cut spending. I had already cut back as far as I could on my clothing. I had enough warm clothes. I did odd jobs for Joh
n for some hay to feed the horses, so I managed to save aside some extra money there.
I looked at Ann’s clothing and the food budget. I sighed loudly and stood up and paced in front of the desk. I hated to cut back on the things she enjoyed. She had bought some warmer and prettier dresses, which I liked. She not only looked good in them but she had fun buying them. It was one of the things she did enjoy back in Virginia. I sat back down in front of a pile of papers and considered cutting back the food budget. I wrote some amounts down to the few foods I knew. I did enjoy her cooking, and she had fun trying new recipes. Some of them were fancy but it tasted just as good as the other stuff she made. If I cut back on the food and clothing, it would save more, but I didn’t want to do that to her.
I stared out the window and recalled the last time she brought a new dress home. Her face glowed with pleasure. I wished she liked me as much as she liked those dresses. I threw the pencil down in aggravation and paced the floor again. I didn’t like thinking such thoughts. I had to be important to her in some way. She wouldn’t even tell me she loved me, but she had no trouble expressing her pleasure for cooking and buying clothes. I groaned. So I wasn’t going to sleep tonight. I blew out the candle and crept up the stairs. Despite my frustration, I quietly shut the bedroom door. I wanted slam it so she would wake up and come running out of her bedroom to ask me what was wrong.
Then what? I would get to look at her in her nightgown, which didn’t hide as much as the dresses did, but she’d be oblivious to the fact that I was in pajamas which didn’t hide much either. She’d be relieved that I was alright and go back to her room. She wouldn’t invite me to her room or come into mine. Then the next day, I’d be just as miserable but with the reminder that she didn’t care to do anything interesting with me the night before when she had the perfect chance. I laid on my bed and resigned myself to another sleepless night. Again, the thought crept into my mind that I should have left her back in Virginia.
Falling In Love With Her Husband Page 8