The George Barr McCutcheon Megapack: 25 Classic Novels and Stories

by George Barr McCutcheon

  “On your life, old man, don’t fail me.”

  “Don’t worry, Graves; all Christendom couldn’t keep me in Dexter after four o’clock this afternoon. Good-by.” And Crosby climbed into the hansom and was driven away at breakneck speed toward the station.

  Crosby was the junior member of the law firm of Rolfe & Crosby, and his trip to the country was on business connected with the settlement of a big estate. Mrs. Delancy, widow of a son of the decedent, was one of the legatees, and she was visiting her sister-in-law, Mrs. Robert Austin, in central Illinois. Mr. Austin owned extensive farming interests near Dexter, and his handsome home was less than two miles from the heart of the town. Crosby anticipated no trouble in driving to the house and back in time to catch the afternoon train for Chicago. It was necessary for Mrs. Delancy to sign certain papers, and he was confident the transaction could not occupy more than half an hour’s time.

  At 11:30 Crosby stepped from the coach to the station platform in Dexter, looked inquiringly about, and then asked a perspiring man with a star on his suspender-strap where he could hire a horse and buggy. The officer directed him to a “feed-yard and stable,” but observed that there was a “funeral in town an’ he’d be lucky if he got a rig, as all of Smith’s horses were out.” Application at the stable brought the first frown to Crosby’s brow. He could not rent a “rig” until after the funeral, and that would make it too late for him to catch the four o’clock train for Chicago. To make the story short, twelve o’clock saw him trudging along the dusty road covering the two miles between town and Austin’s place, and he was walking with the rapidity of one who has no love for the beautiful.

  The early spring air was invigorating, and it did not take him long to reduce the distance. Austin’s house stood on a hill, far back from the highway, and overlooking the entire country-side.

  The big red barn stood in from the road a hundred yards or more, and he saw that the same driveway led to the house on the hill. There was no time for speculation, so he hastily made his way up the lane. Crosby had never seen his client, their business having been conducted by mail or through Mr. Rolfe. There was not a person in sight, and he slowed his progress considerably as he drew nearer the big house. At the barn-yard gate he came to a full stop and debated within himself the wisdom of inquiring at the stables for Mr. Austin.

  He flung open the gate and strode quickly to the door. This he opened boldly and stepped inside, finding himself in a lofty carriage room. Several handsome vehicles stood at the far end, but the wide space near the door was clear. The floor was as “clean as a pin,” except along the west side. No one was in sight, and the only sound was that produced by the horses as they munched their hay and stamped their hoofs in impatient remonstrance with the flies.

  “Where the deuce are the people?” he muttered as he crossed to the mangers. “Devilish queer,” glancing about in considerable doubt. “The hands must be at dinner or taking a nap.” He passed by a row of mangers and was calmly inspected by brown-eyed horses. At the end of the long row of stalls he found a little gate opening into another section of the barn. He was on the point of opening this gate to pass in among the horses when a low growl attracted his attention. In some alarm he took a precautionary look ahead. On the opposite side of the gate stood a huge and vicious looking bulldog, unchained and waiting for him with an eager ferocity that could not be mistaken. Mr. Crosby did not open the gate. Instead he inspected it to see that it was securely fastened, and then drew his hand across his brow.

  “What an escape!” he gasped, after a long breath. “Lucky for me you growled, old boy. My name is Crosby, my dear sir, and I’m not here to steal anything. I’m only a lawyer. Anybody else at home but you?”

  An ominous growl was the answer, and there was lurid disappointment in the face of the squat figure beyond the gate.

  “Come, now, old chap, don’t be nasty. I won’t hurt you. There was nothing farther from my mind than a desire to disturb you. And say, please do something besides growl. Bark, and oblige me. You may attract the attention of some one.”

  By this time the ugly brute was trying to get at the man, growling, and snarling savagely. Crosby complacently looked on from his place of safety for a moment, and was on the point of turning away when his attention was caught by a new move on the part of the dog. The animal ceased his violent efforts to get through the gate, turned about deliberately, and raced from view behind the horse stalls. Crosby brought himself up with a jerk.

  “Thunder,” he ejaculated; “the brute knows a way to get at me, and he won’t be long about it, either. What the dickens shall I—by George, this looks serious! He’ll head me off at the door if I try to get out and—Ah, the fire-escape! We’ll fool you, you brute! What a cursed idiot I was not to go to the house instead of coming—” He was shinning up a ladder with little regard for grace as he mumbled this self-condemnatory remark. There was little dignity in his manner of flight, and there was certainly no glory in the position in which he found himself a moment later. But there was a vast amount of satisfaction.

  The ladder rested against a beam that crossed the carriage shed near the middle. The beam was a large one, hewn from a monster tree, and was free on all sides. The ladder had evidently been left there by men who had used it recently and had neglected to return it to the hooks on which it properly hung.

  When the dog rushed violently through the door and into the carriage room, he found a vast and inexplicable solitude. He was, to all appearances, alone with the vehicles under which he was permitted to trot when his master felt inclined to grant the privilege.

  Crosby, seated on the beam, fifteen feet above the floor, grinned securely but somewhat dubiously as he watched the mystified dog below. At last he laughed aloud. He could not help it. The enemy glanced upward and blinked his red eyes in surprise; then he stared in deep chagrin, then glared with rage. For a few minutes Crosby watched his frantic efforts to leap through fifteen feet of altitudinal space, confidently hoping that some one would come to drive the brute away and liberate him. Finally he began to lose the good humor his strategy in fooling the dog had inspired, and a hurt, indignant stare was directed toward the open door through which he had entered.

  “What’s the matter with the idiots?” he growled impatiently. “Are they going to let this poor dog snarl his lungs out? He’s a faithful chap, too, and a willing worker. Gad, I never saw anything more earnest than the way he tries to climb up that ladder.” Adjusting himself in a comfortable position, his elbows on his knees, his hands to his chin, he allowed his feet to swing lazily, tantalizingly, below the beam. “I’m putting a good deal of faith in this beam,” he went on resignedly. The timber was at least fifteen inches square.

  “Ah, by George! That was a bully jump—the best you’ve made. You didn’t miss me more than ten feet that time. I don’t like to be disrespectful, you know, but you are an exceedingly rough looking dog. Don’t get huffy about it, old fellow, but you have the ugliest mouth I ever saw. Yes, you miserable cur, politeness at last ceases to be a virtue with me. If I had you up here I’d punch your face for you, too. Why don’t you come up, you coward? You’re bow-legged, too, and you haven’t any more figure than a crab. Anybody that would take an insult like that is beneath me (thank heaven!) and would steal sheep. Great Scott! Where are all these people? Shut up, you brute, you! I’m getting a headache. But it doesn’t do any good to reason with you, I can see that plainly. The thing I ought to do is to go down there and punish you severely. But I’ll— Hello! Hey, boy! Call off this—confounded dog.”

  Two small Lord Fauntleroy boys were standing in the door, gazing up at him with wide open mouths and bulging eyes.

  “Call him off, I say, or I’ll come down there and kick a hole clear through him.” The boys stared all the harder. “Is your name Austin?” he demanded, addressing neither in particular.

  “Yes, sir,” answered the larger boy, with an effort.

  “Well, where’s your father? Shut up, you brute
! Can’t you see I’m talking? Go tell your father I want to see him, boy.”

  “Dad’s up at the house.”

  “That sounds encouraging. Can’t you call off this dog?”

  “I—I guess I’d better not. That’s what dad keeps him for.”

  “Oh, he does, eh? And what is it that he keeps him for?”

  “To watch tramps.”

  “To watch—to watch tramps? Say, boy, I’m a lawyer and I’m here on business.” He was black in the face with indignation.

  “You better come up to the house and see dad, then. He don’t live in the barn,” said the boy keenly.

  “I can’t fly to the house, boy. Say, if you don’t call off this dog I’ll put a bullet through him.”

  “You’d have to be a purty good shot, mister. Nearly everybody in the county has tried to do it.” Both boys were grinning diabolically and the dog took on energy through inspiration. Crosby longed for a stick of dynamite.

  “I’ll give you a dollar if you get him away from here.”

  “Let’s see your dollar.” Crosby drew a silver dollar from his trousers pocket, almost falling from his perch in the effort.

  “Here’s the coin. Call him off,” gasped the lawyer.

  “I’m afraid papa wouldn’t like it,” said the boy. The smaller lad nudged his brother and urged him to “take the money anyhow.”

  “I live in Chicago,” Crosby began, hoping to impress the boys at least.

  “So do we when we’re at home,” said the smaller boy. “We live in Chicago in the winter time.”

  “Is Mrs. Delancy your aunt?”

  “Yes, sir.”

  “I’ll give you this dollar if you’ll tell your father I’m here and want to see him at once.”

  “Throw down your dollar.” The coin fell at their feet but rolled deliberately through a crack in the floor and was lost forever. Crosby muttered something unintelligible, but resignedly threw a second coin after the first.

  “He’ll be out when he gets through dinner,” said the older boy, just before the fight. Two minutes later he was streaking across the barn lot with the coin in his pocket, the smaller boy wailing under the woe of a bloody nose. For half an hour Crosby heaped insult after insult upon the glowering dog at the bottom of the ladder and was in the midst of a rabid denunciation of Austin when the city-bred farmer entered the barn.

  “Am I addressing Mr. Robert Austin?” called Crosby, suddenly amiable. The dog subsided and ran to his master’s side. Austin, a black-moustached, sallow-faced man of forty, stopped near the door and looked aloft, squinting.

  “Where are you?” he asked somewhat sharply.

  “I am very much up in the air,” replied Crosby. “Look a little sou’ by sou’east. Ah, now you have me. Can you manage the dog? If so, I’ll come down.”

  “One moment, please. Who are you?”

  “My name is Crosby, of Rolfe & Crosby, Chicago. I am here to see Mrs. Delancy, your sister-in-law, on business before she leaves for New York.”

  “What is your business with her, may I ask?”

  “Private,” said Crosby laconically. “Hold the dog.”

  “I insist in knowing the nature of your business,” said Austin firmly.

  “I’d rather come down there and talk, if you don’t mind.”

  “I don’t but the dog may,” said the other grimly.

  “Well, this is a nice way to treat a gentleman,” cried Crosby wrathfully.

  “A gentleman would scarcely have expected to find a lady in the barn, much less on a cross-beam. This is where my horses and dogs live.”

  “Oh, that’s all right now; this isn’t a joke, you know.”

  “I quite agree with you. What is your business with Mrs. Delancy?”

  “We represent her late husband’s interests in settling up the estate of his father. Your wife’s interests are being looked after by Morton & Rogers, I believe. I am here to have Mrs. Delancy go through the form of signing papers authorizing us to bring suit against the estate in order to establish certain rights of which you are fully aware. Your wife’s brother left his affairs slightly tangled, you remember.”

  “Well, I can save you a good deal of trouble. Mrs. Delancy has decided to let the matter rest as it is and to accept the compromise terms offered by the other heirs. She will not care to see you, for she has just written to your firm announcing her decision.”

  “You—you don’t mean it,” exclaimed Crosby in dismay. He saw a prodigious fee slipping through his fingers. “Gad, I must see her about this,” he went on, starting down the ladder, only to go back again hastily. The growling dog leaped forward and stood ready to receive him. Austin chuckled audibly.

  “She really can’t see you, Mr. Crosby. Mrs. Delancy leaves at four o’clock for Chicago, where she takes the Michigan Central for New York tonight. You can gain nothing by seeing her.”

  “But I insist, sir,” exploded Crosby.

  “You may come down when you like,” said Austin. “The dog will be here until I return from the depot after driving her over. Come down when you like.”

  Crosby did not utter the threat that surged to his lips. With the wisdom born of self-preservation, he temporized, reserving deep down in the surging young breast a promise to amply recompense his pride for the blows it was receiving at the hands of the detestable Mr. Austin.

  “You’ll admit that I’m in a devil of a pickle, Mr. Austin,” he said jovially. “The dog is not at all friendly.”

  “He is at least diverting. You won’t be lonesome while I’m away. I’ll tell Mrs. Delancy that you called,” said Austin ironically.

  He turned to leave the barn, and the sinister sneer on his face gave Crosby a new and amazing inspiration. Like a flash there rushed into his mind the belief that Austin had a deep laid design in not permitting him to see the lady. With this belief also came the conviction that he was hurrying her off to New York on some pretext simply to forestall any action that might induce her to continue the contemplated suit against the estate. Mrs. Delancy had undoubtedly been urged to drop the matter under pressure of promises, and the Austins were getting her away from the scene of action before she could reconsider or before her solicitors could convince her of the mistake she was making. The thought of this sent the fire of resentment racing through Crosby’s brain, and he fairly gasped with the longing to get at the bottom of the case. His only hope now lay in sending a telegram to Mr. Rolfe, commanding him to meet Mrs. Delancy when her train reached Chicago, and to lay the whole matter before her.

  Before Austin could make his exit the voices of women were heard outside the door and an instant later two ladies entered. The farmer attempted to turn them back, but the younger, taller, and slighter of the newcomers cried:

  “I just couldn’t go without another look at the horses, Bob.”

  Crosby, on the beam, did not fail to observe the rich, tender tone of the voice, and it would have required almost total darkness to obscure the beauty of her face. Her companion was older and coarser, and he found delight in the belief that she was the better half of the disagreeable Mr. Austin.

  “Good-afternoon, Mrs. Delancy!” came a fine masculine voice from nowhere. The ladies started in amazement, Mr. Austin ground his teeth, the dog took another tired leap upward; Mr. Crosby took off his hat gallantly, and waited patiently for the lady to discover his whereabouts.

  “Who is it, Bob?” cried the tall one, and Crosby patted his bump of shrewdness happily. “Who have you in hiding here?”

  “I’m not in hiding, Mrs. Delancy. I’m a prisoner, that’s all. I’m right near the top of the ladder directly in front of you. You know me only through the mails, but my partner, Mr. Rolfe, is known to you personally. My name is Crosby.”

  “How very strange,” she cried in wonder. “Why don’t you come down, Mr. Crosby?”

  “I hate to admit it, but I’m afraid. There’s the dog, you know. Have you any influence over him?”

  “None whatever. He hates me. Perha
ps Mr. Austin can manage him. Oh, isn’t it ludicrous?” and she burst into hearty laughter. It was a very musical laugh, but Crosby considered it a disagreeable croak.

  “But Mr. Austin declines to interfere. I came to see you on private business and am not permitted to do so.”

  “We don’t know this fellow, Louise, and I can’t allow you to talk to him,” said Austin brusquely. “I found him where he is and there he stays until the marshal comes out from town. His actions have been very suspicious and must be investigated. I can’t take chances on letting a horse thief escape. Swallow will watch him until I can secure assistance.”

  “I implore you, Mrs. Delancy, to give me a moment or two in which to explain,” cried Crosby. “He knows I’m not here to steal his horses, and he knows I intend to punch his head the minute I get the chance.” Mrs. Austin’s little shriek of dismay and her husband’s fierce glare did not check the flow of language from the beam. “I AM Crosby of Rolfe & Crosby, your counsel. I have the papers here for you to sign and—”

  “Louise, I insist that you come away from here. This fellow is a fraud—”

  “He’s refreshing, at any rate,” said Mrs. Delancy gaily. “There can be no harm in hearing what he has to say, Bob.”

  “You are very kind, and I won’t detain you long.”

  “I’ve a mind to kick you out of this barn,” cried Austin angrily.

  “I don’t believe you’re tall enough, my good fellow.” Mr. Crosby was more than amiable. He was positively genial. Mrs. Delancy’s pretty face was the picture of eager, excited mirth, and he saw that she was determined to see the comedy to the end.

  “Louise!” exclaimed Mrs. Austin, speaking for the first time. “You are not fool enough to credit this fellow’s story, I’m sure. Come to the house at once. I will not stay here.” Mrs. Austin’s voice was hard and biting, and Crosby also caught the quick glance that passed between husband and wife.

  “I am sure Mrs. Delancy will not be so unkind as to leave me after I’ve had so much trouble in getting an audience. Here is my card, Mrs. Delancy.” Crosby tossed a card from his perch, but Swallow gobbled it up instantly. Mrs. Delancy gave a little cry of disappointment, and Crosby promptly apologized for the dog’s greediness. “Mr. Austin knows I’m Crosby,” he concluded.