Until the Devil Weeps

by W E DeVore

  Sanger returned to the room, wearing fitted boxers and his unbuttoned dress shirt from the night before. He pulled Q to him and cupped her throat, turning her face to kiss her. She smiled up at him and said, “Five minutes, my love.”

  Yvie stood staring at the two of them, mouth agape and Q shoved her towards the door, reproaching, “Stop staring at my boyfriend’s erection, Yvonne.”

  “Your boyfriend.” Yvie was grinning wildly and laughing, grudgingly allowing herself to be pushed from the room. “You have a boyfriend…Aaron Sanger is your boyfriend… you’re Aaron Sanger’s girlfriend.”

  “Go, Yvie. Jesus,” Q complained, propelling her down the hall towards the stairs. She leaned back into the doorway to find Sanger sitting on the bed, still several shades of scarlet and laughing to himself. “Be right back, cowboy. Don’t go anywhere.”

  Once they were outside on the porch, Q put her hands on her hips and pursed her lips. “Bedroom doors close for a reason, Yvonne.”

  “How the hell was I supposed to know the two of you were up there fucking? I thought he was helping you move some boxes or something.” Yvie walked to the swing and Q followed to sit beside her. Yvie flushed, saying, “My god, that body of his is something else, isn’t it?”

  Q bit her lower lip and blushed all the way to the tips of her ears.

  “This is so great!” Yvie exclaimed. “Was last night the first time? When did this happen? Give me some details.” Yvie shadowed Q’s gaze, refusing to let her break eye contact. “You’ve been holding out on me. I knew there was something up with you. Why didn’t you tell me?”

  “It happened the night of the ice storm and every night since. But he’s been on an awful case the last few weeks. He just solved it. We had our first real date last night.”

  “How was it? The date I mean, I know how the rest is.”

  Q slapped her arm. “Don’t remind me, weirdo. The date was good.”

  She hesitated, wondering if she should discuss Sanger’s theories with Ben’s family or not. Yvie tilted her head to regard Q’s face. “What is it?”

  “Sanger caught a break. On my case. It was a hit. Someone hired those boys to come after us…” She chewed on her thumb. “He thinks Ben was the target.”

  Yvie gasped. “Why? Who would want to kill my brother?”

  Q shook her head slowly from side to side. “I don’t know, sissie, but he’s going to have to question the family. See if anyone can think of anybody Ben may have mentioned. Somebody did this to us. Aaron’s going to find them.”

  Yvie cursed under her breath. “I don’t suppose I can convince you to keep this thing between you and Aaron under wraps.”

  “Why?” Q protested. “We’re not doing anything wrong.”

  Yvie held up her hand to silence her. “I didn’t say you were. I’m just thinking you should pick your battles, darlin’. If the two of you show up now, half the family is going to pressure you to marry him and the other half will be pressuring you to end it. Is that what you want?”

  “Which half are you in?” Q asked.

  “Neither. I am Switzerland, darlin’. I just want you to be happy.” She wrinkled her nose and sighed, “Fuck it. I’ll run interference. Y’all coming today?”

  “No. Aaron needs some peace and quiet. Figured those would be in short supply if we showed together this afternoon.”

  “Good. I’ll talk to Mama and Daddy. Mama’s going to be over the moon about this, you know that, right? I’ll tell them about the investigation, too. We’ll bring in the big guns. Get Emmy to work on her wife. Get Grace some Thorazine to calm to fuck down…”

  Q laughed. “I love you, Yvie. Thank you.”

  She winked at her and stood up. “I’ve got your back, darlin’. The really good news is that I was right and Ben was wrong.”

  “Wrong about what?” Q asked.

  “He always thought you’d leave him for Derek Sharp.”

  Q laughed out loud. “I never did understand that. You really don’t mind, about me and Aaron? I know you loved him…”

  Yvie shooed an invisible insect. “I love you more than I ever thought about loving him, you understand me? Besides, I am nobody’s second choice and am crazy in love with one Mr. Josh Mason who loves me and nobody else.” She winked at her and hugged her tightly before moving to leave. “Ben would love this. He really would. He wanted everything good for you, Q. Don’t you ever forget that.”

  Q walked back into the house, relocking the door behind her. She climbed the stairs to find Sanger already back in bed, staring out the bay window into the branches of the live oak outside. She peeled off her clothes and climbed in beside him. He opened his arm and she laid down against his chest.

  “I’m yours. All day. This bed, as promised,” she said, snuggling closer to him.

  Tracing the lines of his muscles with her fingertips as she made leisurely circles down his torso, she felt his body tense. She looked up at his face. He was still gazing out the window, his face serious, his eyes watering.

  “Aaron, what’s wrong?” she asked.

  “Nothing,” he said. “Just having a hard time keeping the bad shit locked down. I’ll be ok, just give me a minute.”

  “What bad shit?” Anxiety pooled in her stomach. “Is there something else? Something you haven’t told me?”

  “No. It’s just work. It happens. Go make us some coffee, I’ll be alright.” He pinched his eyes and grasped at his hair, attempting to smile and failing miserably.

  “That case really got to you,” she said.

  His voice broke and he turned away. “I hate the ones with kids. The youngest wasn’t even in kindergarten yet.”

  Since he still wouldn’t look at her, she climbed over him and slid down to the bed to face him. “I know I’ve been leaning on you really hard all these months. You don’t have to be strong for me anymore. I can be strong for you. What happens to you, happens to me, too. And I know what an ugly world it is, baby, you don’t have to hide it from me.”

  He shook his head and sat up on the edge of the bed, covering his face as he began to cry in earnest. She crawled to him and silently wrapped her arms around his waist, resting her cheek on his back, letting him get it out.

  He finally wiped his eyes with the back of his hand. “This world is shit, Clementine. I fucking hate humans.”

  She rose up on her knees and kissed the back of his neck before leaning her chin on his shoulder. “No, my love. The world isn’t shit. Unfortunately, it is chockablock full of shitty people who do shitty things for even shittier reasons. But you caught the monster, baby. He can’t hurt anyone else.”

  He pulled her closer. “I can’t catch all of them. I couldn’t find the assholes that shot you and Ben.”

  “Stop. Please.”

  “No, I won’t. Let’s say you’re right; BBB that hired the hit. They sent five letters after Ben’s murder and just stopped. Why? Five letters and then nothing since October? They’re planning something.”

  Q considered it for a moment. Her stalker had stopped their letters as suddenly as they’d started again. When she’d mentioned it to Derek, he said he’d handled it. She just now realized she hadn’t looked at Dark Harm social media for months. “Fuck. I have a feeling neither one is going to like this very much. Let me go get my phone.”

  “What’s wrong?”

  “Derek told me he handled the situation and not to worry about it.”

  “So?” he asked.

  “So, last October, I was passed out topless in his bed next to his naked personal assistant who also handles all his social media and is going through a nasty divorce.” She cursed under her breath. “I’m worrying about it.”

  She got out of bed and went downstairs to retrieve her phone. Opening the Dark Harm Instagram profile on her way, she stared at picture after alternating picture of her and Derek. The post from yesterday was her face resting against a pillow, her hair a dark halo. She recognized it from a promo shoot they’d done years earlier that h
ad never been used. She read the text below:

  The best part of my day is waking up to this. – D.S. #LoveMyGirl

  She immediately dialed Derek’s number. He yawned as he answered, “Well, good morning, angel. To what do I owe the pleasure?”

  “What the fuck, Cincinnati?” she asked as she walked back upstairs.

  “It’s nice to hear your voice, too, Q.”

  “Explain yourself,” she said.

  “If I could do that, I doubt I’d be a musician,” he replied.

  It caught Q off guard and she giggled. “Instagram. What is this all this ‘hashtag love my girl’ bullshit?”

  She arrived back in the bedroom and Sanger gave her a concerned look. She shook him off as Derek replied, “Me. Fixing this situation. You needed a break, so I took care of it.”

  “Took care of what?”

  “Another letter came, right after you pulled your disappearing act in November. A bad one. I called Elaine, thinking we could do our little routine again and she told me what you tried to do to yourself.”

  “Why didn’t you tell me?”

  “Didn’t want to piss you off. Archangel. Unstable dynamite. I like my genitals attached to my body, you know. The usual.”

  “Derek…”

  He exhaled heavily in her ear. “Look, angel. It’s not the first time I’ve seen it. You’re ok, now. That’s all that matters. The Instagram stuff was Elaine’s idea. Give BBB what they wanted. A very public romance between you and me, while you were safely hidden away in Spot’s little doghouse. Worked like a charm. We still friends?”

  “I suppose.”

  “See you tomorrow at rehearsals?”

  “Yes.” She paused for a moment. “Derek, thank you.”

  “You’re welcome, angel.”

  Q hung up and told Sanger what had happened, showing him the pictures and posts that were alighting the Dark Harm message boards. He lay back down on the bed, staring at the ceiling. “It was a smart move. Giving them what they want. We never tried it before because of you and Ben. I’m going over later to take a look through the hospital personnel again. See if anyone left suddenly… BBB is still our best lead.”

  She sat on the edge of the bed and tapped his head with her index finger. “Cop brain off. Now. Girlfriend’s orders. We’re going to be happy today. Today the world is not shit. Today BBB doesn’t exist. Today the world is a very soft bed and you and me and nothing else. You can start on the case tomorrow.”

  “Clementine…”

  “No. What’s the good of dating a cop if you don’t get your own personal private security detail?”

  He grinned at her. “How personal we talking here?”

  “Absolutely private. Phones off. Doors closed. We’re the only two people in the world. And clothing is not allowed.” She raised up on her knees and crawled towards him, grinning like a lunatic. “Now, Aaron Sanger. Tell me exactly where it hurts, so I can make it all better.”

  He said in a low voice, “I think I’m going to like this day.”

  March: Testing

  Yvie let out a low whistle as she walked inside. “Jesus, Q. Did you move everything out?”

  Q grunted and blew an errant curl out of her face as she picked up a box, carrying it past her sister-in-law and down to the lawn. “Just the stuff I didn’t want. Movers will be here this afternoon to take it all to a storage room. I’m giving Mama and Daddy the keys. Y’all can take whatever you want. It’s paid for through the end of the year, and then it gets donated.”

  She set the box next to the others and walked back into the house, gesturing for Yvie to follow her into the kitchen. As she poured herself a glass of ice water, Yvie sat at the table.

  “I’m surprised you’re keeping this table,” she said. “You know it came with the house, right?”

  “So? I love this table. Ben told me he loved me, right there. Ask me to marry him right there. It stays.”

  Yvie smoothed her hand over the wood. “Good. I always liked it, too.”

  Q caught an ice cube with her tongue and sucked on it. “I’m bringing Aaron to Sunday dinner this week. We’ve been together almost two months. Everybody’s just going to have to get used to it.”

  “What’s the rush?” Yvie asked.

  She sat down at the table. “I’m not rushing this, Yvie.” When Yvie replied with a rueful twist of her mouth, Q continued, “Grace was awful to him when he tried to question her about Ben. The case is already cold enough without her pouring ice water on it.”

  “What did she say?”

  “You don’t want to know. If I say the words out loud, I might not be able to forgive her. I’m having a hard time as it is.”

  Yvie leaned forward and rested her elbows on the table. “Come on. Let’s hear it.”

  “She said that the only person she could see with a motive to want Ben dead was Aaron.” Q sipped her water and watched the sunlight track through the leaves of the tree outside. “She accused Aaron Sanger. The man that saved her brother from spending his life in prison. She accused him of murdering his best friend.”

  Yvie flinched. “I hate to tell you this, but Nita thinks the same thing… or she did,” she corrected herself. “Now she thinks it’s Derek.”

  Q slammed the flat of her hand down on the table. “Oh, for fuck’s sake.”

  Without warning Yvie started to laugh. When Q gave her a quizzical look, she explained, “Mama said exactly that. They won’t be at Sunday dinner – Grace and Nita – they’re not welcome. Mama got really mad and then Daddy told them to get out of the house and not to come back until they came to their senses.”

  “Great. Now everyone’s fighting because of me.”

  “No, they’re not,” Yvie corrected. “Grace and Nita are being mean. Cruel, even. Spreading lies. Being all harsh and judgmental. If they were still kids, they’d be grounded and forced to read ‘Charlotte’s Web.’”

  “I’m sorry, what now?” Q asked, confused.

  Yvie grinned at her. “Whenever we got caught saying something mean about somebody else – a classmate, each other, a stranger on the street – Mama would bust out ‘Charlotte’s Web.’ Tell us to be more like Charlotte. Be kind.”

  “You’re kidding me.”

  “Nope. When we were being selfish, it was ‘The Giving Tree.’ Mean was ‘Charlotte’s Web.’ Lying was ‘Horton Hears a Who.’” She squinted one eye. “Do you know I’ve read the ‘The Giving Tree’ one-hundred-and-thirty-seven times. Family record. Ben was close.”

  Q folded her arms. “Now, I know you’re bullshitting me. Ben was the most generous person I’ve ever met.”

  “Right. He was the tree. I was the boy. He’d give and give and then get mad because I’d keep taking. We had to read it so much one summer, we hid it in the attic.”

  “What did Mama do?”

  “Made us buy another copy out of our allowance.” Yvie winked. “Can I ask you something?”

  “Of course.”

  “Do you love Aaron?”

  “Yes,” Q whispered. “It’s not fair to him. Ben’s still everywhere. Aaron deserves more. I should break up with him…. go on tour again and stay on the road instead of fucking everybody’s life up.”

  Yvie grinned. “You are in love with him. It’s written all over you.”

  “It’s too soon. It’s only been two months.”

  “Two months and what, like five years? Jesus, you’ve been friends forever. It was the same with me and Josh. It was a done deal two weeks in.”

  “It’s always a done deal for you, two weeks in,” Q teased.

  “Yeah, but not for them… Listen to me, Q, you love him? You hold onto him. Bring him to Sunday dinner and hold your head high. Maybe he deserves more, maybe he doesn't. But I can tell you that Aaron wants you. He doesn’t want anyone else. That’s never going to change.” Yvie looked at her intently, Ben’s amber eyes staring out through his sister’s face. “Ben would want you to be loved by a good man and for you to love that man just
as much as you ever loved him, you know that, right?”

  Q couldn’t speak. Intellectually, she knew Yvie was telling her was the truth, but this was the first time she believed it. She chewed on her nail and blinked away her sadness. “Okay, then. You ready to do this?”

  She pulled Yvie to her feet and they went upstairs to the master bedroom. As Q flung open the closet doors, a wave of lavender and allspice filled the room. “God, I miss that smell. Thank you for coming. I couldn’t do this by myself.”