Chomps, Flea, and Gray Cat [That’s Me!]

by Carol Wallace

  “Stop, Chomps! You have to be careful when you go across. Not many cars go by here, but when they do, they usually are going too fast to stop for animals.”

  Chomps paused and looked back at me. He waited at the edge of the road until I could catch up. I showed the little dog how to look carefully in both directions. I made him hold his breath and listen.

  “If you don’t see anything and if you don’t hear anything, then it’s okay to go.”

  His ears flopped when he nodded his head.

  The hunt began about the same as before. Chomps jumped and scampered after sounds that he thought he heard in the stiff grass. I watched him. It was easier to let him get some of the energy out of his system before we started any serious hunting.

  I finally decided that maybe we should just explore the hill. The mice were doing a good job of hiding anyway.

  Chomps ran ahead of me. Suddenly he stopped, spun around, and raced back as quickly as his stubby little legs would carry him. I couldn’t believe how fast he was coming at me. My whiskers twitched when I saw how big his eyes were.

  “Gray! Hurry!” he yapped.

  “What?”

  “It’s huge!” he said, his eyes growing even bigger. “Makes the ones in the barn look like babies, and he’s scared of me. He’s running away.”

  “What?” I repeated. I realized that Chomps was coming so fast that he wouldn’t be able to stop. I scrunched down close to the ground, closed my eyes, and braced myself.

  Sure enough, the pup slammed into me, fell over, and tumbled about three times. When he scrambled to his feet, he didn’t even slow down long enough to shake the grass from his fur. He just charged. This time he jumped over me instead of falling.

  “Come on, Gray! It will take both of us to carry him to the mat.”

  “Chomps, what in the world are you talking about?”

  “The trophy!” He didn’t even take the time to glance over his shoulder at me. “It’s the biggest trophy ever! Mama won’t believe it. She will be so proud of us. It’s the most humongous rat I’ve ever seen in my whole life.”

  • • •

  I guess—to a puppy—the animal looked like a big rat. It was sort of gray and it had a long ratty tail. I clamped my lips shut to keep from laughing as Chomps barked and barked at it.

  The opossum stood its ground and hissed. Chomps hopped and leaped around yipping until I thought he would knock himself over. I felt my eyes roll. The creature suddenly took off toward the creek. Chomps made small jumps at the opossum’s heels as they ran. At the stream the animal stopped, bared his teeth, and hissed again. Chomps’s eyes flashed and he stumbled over himself when he ran backward.

  “Let’s go, Chomps. You don’t want him. He isn’t going to hurt anything.” I flipped my tail and moved toward the meadow.

  “But he’s a giant trophy! He’s a rat and . . .”

  “He’s not a rat. He’s an opossum.”

  “A what?”

  “Never mind. He’s not a rat. Just come on.”

  Chomps started toward me, still keeping an eye on the opossum. Suddenly the animal darted toward the water. Chomps charged him again, growling and making that chomping sound with his jaws. The opossum fell over in a heap.

  Chomps’s ears shot straight up. His head tilted to one side. Cautiously he leaned toward the animal and nudged him with his nose. He jumped back. When the opossum didn’t move, Chomps shoved him again.

  Chomps looked back at me. “Is he dead? I didn’t do anything!”

  “Don’t worry. He’s okay. Opossums play dead so that their enemies will leave them alone. As soon as we get away and he knows that he is safe, he will sneak off and forget all about us.”

  Chomps nudged the thing one more time before he followed me toward the hill.

  Just as we settled into a nice pace, Chomps suddenly sniffed the air and took off running toward the creek. I perked my ears and tried to sniff the breeze to see what he was so interested in. I froze in fear as I suddenly realized what the little dog had found this time.

  Chomps’s short stubby legs raced at full speed toward the striped kitty. My whole body tensed. “Chomps! No! It’s a skunk! If he sprays you, it will take two weeks for the smell to go away and . . .”

  The dumb mutt slid to a stop. He sneezed a couple of times, then spun and raced back to me. We were just lucky he smelled the varmint before it sprayed him.

  “Man, that guy stinks!” He sneezed again.

  “No kidding.” I nodded. “See how he’s got his tail up? If he sprayed you, you’d stink.”

  “It looked like a black-and-white kitty cat. You and Callie are fun to play with, and I just wanted to have a little chase game.”

  “We’re exploring today, dog. If you want a chase game with a cat, we can go back to the house and play in the yard.”

  The little dog’s ears flattened against his head. “I’d rather explore. I’ll try to be careful.”

  I swished my tail and we headed for the creek.

  There was only a trickle of water in the stream. I jumped over. Chomps managed to get one paw muddy when he sloshed through the water. I had to wait for him while he washed his paw. That dumb pup was always washing his feet. When he was done, he raced ahead of me. We hadn’t gone very far from the water when he stopped and began barking and bouncing again.

  “What now, dog?” My tail flipped so hard, I had to move my hind legs to keep it from knocking me off balance. We would never make it to the rock hill at this rate.

  “I saw that rock move! It’s got legs!” Chomps barked at the rock again.

  “Chomps! It’s only a turtle.”

  “It looks like a rock, but I saw it move! If it moved, it will play with me.” The mutt just hopped and yipped.

  I walked around to the other side. “Look! Here is its head. He has it tucked under his shell. If he decided to come out and get hold of your nose, you wouldn’t think it was playing. Come on.” The dog circled the turtle a few more times before he finally followed me.

  The raindrop hit right between my ears. It was so big and fell so hard that it made my head bob. Blinking, I looked up at the sky. The huge gray clouds swept in from the west. They were dark and scary looking.

  Cats are always alert and aware of our surroundings. We are good about keeping an eye on what’s going on around us. Nothing ever sneaks up on us cats. Trouble was, I had been so busy watching the crazy pup that I hadn’t even seen it coming. Now the storm was right on top of us.

  Another drop landed in front of me. It splashed water and dust up onto my whiskers. A huge one hit Chomps, right at the base of his tail. We’d never make it back home before the storm hit. It was too close. With a jerk of my tail, I motioned Chomps to follow. We scampered for the rock overhang.

  • • •

  The storm broke limbs and shook tender leaf buds to the ground. Water ran from the hill toward the creek in small rivers. The rain fell so hard and fast that the rock overhang where we huddled was almost like hiding behind a waterfall. There was lightning and thunder and rain that seemed to last forever. When it all finally rumbled away beyond the far hills, we decided that it was safe to leave our shelter.

  The fresh smell of rain filled the air as we walked toward the creek. The sound of running water came to my ears. The creek was no longer a trickle. Water and mud churned and tumbled as it rushed to fill the bed from bank to bank.

  “Listen, dog,” I said, looking over my shoulder. “You have to do exactly what I say and step exactly where I step. The creek is full. It’s muddy and yucky. It’s dangerous, too. You have to mind me and listen to everything I say or we could be in trouble. Okay?”

  “Okay.” His tail wagged.

  “Promise?”

  “Promise.”

  • • •

  Callie saw us coming from the front porch. She stood up when I got close and swished her tail. “What’s wrong with you, Gray?”

  “Nothing!” I hissed. “What makes you think something’
s wrong?”

  Callie tilted her head to one side and shrugged her ears. “Oh, no reason. You’re just all fuzzed up and your face looks like you’ve been chewing on a rotten mouse or something. That’s all.”

  I felt my eyes narrow when I saw Chomps appear at the edge of the pine trees. “That darned pup promised he’d listen to me. We got across the creek all right. The water was really roaring and it was scary, but he followed me and got across safely. But . . .”

  “But?” Callie urged.

  “Well, look for yourself.”

  The little white pup was covered from head to tail with mud. He was a gooey mess. He sniffed the pine needles without a care in the world. A little drop of mud plopped from the tip of his tail when it swayed from side to side.

  “He hit every mud puddle between here and the rock hill. He even rolled in a couple of them. Chomps is fun to be with, but he won’t mind worth a flip. Mama’s going to be so mad. She’ll never let him out again. When she sees what a mess he is, she’ll—”

  “Relax, Gray,” Callie said, cutting me off. “They were so excited when they got back with the new car, they didn’t even notice that he was gone. They even called the Garrisons to come over to look at it! All you have to do is get that pup back in his pen. They’ll just think he got all dirty and muddy from the rain. You’d better hurry, though.”

  Chomps was still sniffing around the pine trees when I heard a car coming up the road. “Hurry, Chomps, get back in the pen before the company gets here.”

  Chomps had already found the new car and was sniffing the big tires. “What’s that good smell, Gray?”

  “Come on, Chomps. Here come the Garrisons!”

  The silver Buick drove into the driveway, and the people stepped out. Mama and Daddy came from the house. Chomps was near the back of the new car.

  Just as Mama opened the front door, Chomps jumped up and landed on the smooth leather seat . . . muddy feet and all.

  CHAPTER 6

  We got our first ride in the new Range Rover that day. Trouble was, we were in cages!

  When Mama saw Chomps slopping mud all over the front seat of her brand-new SUV, she went crazy. She grabbed Chomps off the seat and put him back in his pen. She went to the barn and started tossing stuff around.

  I ran to the garden and hid near the fence behind the bushes. When Mama finally came out, she had two big cages. She wiped the mud off the little dog and crammed him into one of them. Then she started looking for me. I flattened myself to the ground. I had a bad feeling about this. At first she called out, real sweet like, “Here kitty, kitty.”

  As time went by she began to call me by name. “Gray! Get over here, you mangy cat!”

  If it hadn’t been for Chomps’s barking and looking toward the bushes, I would have been safe. The little dog stood up in the cage and pointed his black nose straight at me. When Mama came toward the bushes, I tried to sneak off, but she was quick and grabbed me by the scruff of the neck. The first thing I knew, I was in the other cage, right next to Chomps. Mama shut the back door of her new vehicle and we were off.

  “Gray, why didn’t you warn me she was going to be so mad?”

  “I’ve been warning you all day. Who thought you would jump on the seats of her brand-new car? What were you thinking?”

  Chomps’s ears were down against his head. “It smelled good. I wanted to see where the delicious odor was coming from. I didn’t think they would take us away from our home.”

  I sat on my haunches as I nervously washed my paws and whiskers. “You’ve done it now. We’re probably going to the pound or the vet. I told you to go back to your pen before they saw us. But, no, you had to leap in and get a good look for yourself.”

  “Gray, what are we going to do? I don’t want to go away. I like it here with Mama and Daddy and you and Callie.”

  I batted at the door with my paws. I grabbed the metal with my teeth, but it wouldn’t open. “There’s nothing that I can do. We’ll just have to wait and see what happens.”

  The little dog whined as we drove down the road. I finished my bath and tried to relax as we continued our ride. It was no use.

  When the car finally stopped, Mama picked up my cage, and Daddy carried Chomps’s inside a brick building.

  “Hi, Amy. We’ve got two wild animals for you. It seems that they can’t stay close to home and have managed to make messes of themselves. Gray needs a flea bath and Chomps needs something. Can you help us?”

  A pretty face peered into my cage. “Hello, sweet kitty. What have you been doing to get yourself into so much trouble?”

  She looked into Chomps’s cage, smiled, then opened the door. She pulled him out gently. “What a precious pup! I haven’t seen a white Scottie in a long time. He’s wonderful!” Chomps smiled back at her. The sweet tone of her voice made him wiggle so much I thought he was going to knock himself apart.

  The woman looked up at Mama. “They don’t seem too wild. I think we can get them under control again. Do you want a puppy cut for the little guy or do you think he’s ready for a grown-up look?”

  “He thinks he’s grown-up. He might as well look like a big dog. Give him the works.”

  Mama and Daddy walked out. I pushed my face against the door of the cage to see where they were going. Mama and Daddy got into the big car and drove away. I tried to figure out what I was going to do next.

  “Okay, Chompers, I have to put you back until I finish Rosco here. We’ll get to you pretty quick.” The girl called Amy shoved Chomps back into the cage and rubbed his face before closing the door. She pushed our pens closer together.

  A big black dog stood on a table at the back of the room. He held himself tall and proud. Amy took clippers and started snipping the hair off the dog. She left big pompoms of curly fur around the bottom of his legs, his tail, and around his chest. She took a white hairdryer and fluffed him all over. Then she put a big red bow in his hair and painted his toenails with red fingernail polish.

  “Are you watching, Chomps.” I snickered. “That’s what you’re going to look like when she finishes with you.” I stretched out and folded one paw over the other.

  “No way! Nobody is going to do that to me! That dog looks silly. I am going to growl and bark so that she will leave me alone.”

  “Jeff, will you get Gray and put him in the dip?” Amy called to the man in the back.

  “Sure thing. Come here, Gray.” A dark-haired young man with a black fuzzy caterpillar on his upper lip peeked in at me. I scooted back and watched him. He bent down to see where I had gone. I decided it was hair on his upper lip, because it didn’t try to run away even when he talked.

  “Come here, kitty.”

  I hissed at him. He just smiled and said, “Ah, come on Gray. Be a sweet kitty.”

  Before I even had time to blink, his huge paw darted in and grabbed me by the scruff of the neck and pulled me out of the cage.

  “Come on, kitty. This won’t be so bad.” I couldn’t escape without using my claws, and I was already in too much trouble to try that. So I just dangled there in midair.

  After Amy put the big dog in a cage, she went after Chomps. Jeff took me to a big bathtub full of water. I hate water! I began to squirm even harder. Jeff just held on tighter and plopped me in the tub.

  “MEOW!” I howled!

  Jeff took a cup and poured water over my head and back.

  My hair was dripping and I was miserable. I couldn’t get my ears to stand up straight. My whiskers drooped. He put some stuff onto my fur and started rubbing it all over me. Getting rubbed was okay. If I hadn’t been so soggy and wet, I might have enjoyed it. Finally he rinsed me off and put me back in the cage. I shook myself and tried to get dry.

  Before I could even get my whiskers straightened out, Amy took me from the cage. The hairdryer made a loud whizzing sound. I didn’t like that. It blew hot air in my ears and made them twitch and wiggle. I didn’t like that, either. Amy rubbed and fluffed me. That wasn’t too bad. Then she got a s
oft brush and stroked from my ears to the tip of my tail. That felt pretty good. In fact, it almost made me forget about the noisy hairdryer. When I was finally dry, she clipped the ends of my long claws. I didn’t care for that, but it didn’t hurt at all. Then she took tiny rubber bands and tied them onto my hair. One was right above my eyes and the other was near my tail. I couldn’t see what was on my head, but a bright pink bow was attached on my other end. Once back in my cage, I grabbed with my teeth trying to get it loose. I spun around until I was worn out. It was stuck tight.

  I flopped down and looked out the end of the cage. Chomps was on the table, and Amy was clipping his hair just like she had the big black dog.

  “Told you so . . .” I meowed to Chomps.

  “This isn’t so bad,” Chomps yipped at me. “She is very gentle, and I like the feel of the clippers on my skin. Besides, now Mama can’t pull so much, when I get burrs in my fur.”

  “Don’t look now, dog, but she is leaving a bunch of hair along the bottom, where you usually get burrs anyway.”

  “I don’t care. This feels good.” Amy used scissors to clip the fur on his face. She left lots of hair across the top of his eyes and around his mouth.

  Amy whispered sweet doggie talk to him while she clipped. “What a lovable little puppy you are, Chompies. You’re such a nice little fellow. You can come in any time. What a sweetheart.” His tail wagged so hard it shook him clear up to his pointy ears.

  I couldn’t take any more. I curled up in a ball and tried to catch a quick catnap before I got sick. The sounds of barking dogs, clippers, and hairdryers were soon gone from my head as I dreamed of mice racing away from me.

  • • •

  “We have Chompers and Gray ready.” Amy stood near the front of the shop talking to herself. She held a white thing against the side of her head. I had seen Mama do the same thing, but for the life of me I couldn’t figure out why she had so much fun talking to herself. “Yes, you can pick them up any time.”

  Chomps was in the cage next to me, but I couldn’t see anything but some white fur.