by Lari Smythe
* * *
I'd just dried off when I heard someone at the backdoor. "Mom!" I called down the stairs. "That you?"
Whoever it was, knocked again.
"Be right there!" I raced into my room and got dressed. "Coming." I yanked open the door. "Cathy! What are you doing here?" Behind her, her mother was sitting in the car.
"Are you alone?" Cathy asked.
"Yeah."
"Good, wait here." She ran out to the car and talked to her mother. After what seemed like a heated debate—her mother kept looking past Cathy at me—Cathy kissed her on the cheek and Mrs. Hall drove away. "When will your mother be back?" Cathy said as she slipped past me into the kitchen.
I closed the door and followed her. "I don't know, half an hour—an hour tops."
"Okay." Cathy took off her coat and draped it over the back of one of the kitchen chairs.
"What did you want to talk about?"
She held out her hands to me. "Come here."
This was really weird. I didn't know Cathy very well, but I knew her as a shy insecure person. Now, it almost seemed like she was coming on to me or something.
As I hesitantly stepped forward, she touched my hands with the same kind of—electricity as at the field that day. A calming spread through me as she slid her palms onto mine. "What are you doing?"
"Shhhh," she whispered. Cathy pressed up against me as I relaxed and the sensation increased. This felt wrong on so many levels.
I'm not exactly sure what I was thinking—I was confused—when a vivid image of Izzy filled my thoughts. It was as if someone put her there.
"I miss you," Izzy said. "I'm so sorry I hurt you."
"No, you shouldn't be sorry, it was my fault." Her image began to fade.
"No! Cathy, I won't let you." I yanked my hands away. "Stop!"
Cathy staggered back. "Why'd you do that?"
"I won't let you erase her."
"You know, but—"
"Yeah, I know." I turned my back to her. "And I won't let you take her from me."
"That's not why I'm here."
"Really?" I turned back to her. "Then why?"
"It's complicated."
"I'm listening."
"You mind?" Cathy walked into the family room and sat down on the sofa. She looked a little drained, emotionally.
I sat down next to her, leaving some space. I wasn't comfortable around her, not sure what her intentions were, or what she could do. She wasn't just Emo Cathy anymore, there was more to her now.
Cathy ran her hand gently over the sofa cushion. "Her presence is strong here."
I nodded.
"You know she's a—"
"I know," I stopped her before she said the word out loud.
"You know the power she has?"
"I do."
Cathy slid closer. "I thought I was mad—crazy—but when I touched you at the fence, I knew it was all true, because you knew it too."
"Can you do the same thing?"
"I'm not sure. I've never experienced anything like what happened when we touched at the field, or now," Cathy confessed.
"Not Alex—not your mom?"
"No."
"That doesn't make any sense."
She reached out and touched my hand.
"I won't let you erase her." I pulled away and stood.
Cathy got up. "I promise. I think that since this only seems to happen with you, it must mean something."
"Like what?"
"I don't know, maybe I'm some kind of conduit so she can talk to you or something."
"Seriously?"
"I don't know, but shouldn't we at least give it a shot?"
"What do you want me to do?"
Cathy took my hands again and stepped into me. "Just let go." She pulled my arms around her waist, still clinging to my hands.
"Izzy?" I tested.
"Jason."
Suddenly it was as if my arms were around Izzy and I pulled her tightly against me. "God I've missed you."
"And I miss you, but you have to let me go."
"Never." I looked down into Izzy's eyes. "I'll never let you go, you know that." I pulled her lips to mine and we kissed.
Izzy broke the kiss. "Don't Jason. This can't be."
"It already is. Come home, we'll work it out."
"I can't."
"Then tell me where you are and I'll come to you."
"Jason."
"No!" Her presence began to fade and I clung desperately to her. "Don't go." I pulled her lips to mine and kissed her passionately.
"Jason?" A voice came from behind me—from the kitchen—my mom's voice. "Is that Izzy?"
I broke the kiss stared down at Cathy in disbelief and then spun us around toward the kitchen. "Mom?"
"What the f—"
"Alex!" Cathy shrieked.
"Cathy?" I stammered.
"Dude!" Alex shouted. "I thought we were buds." He turned in a huff and started for the backdoor.
"Alex, wait!" Cathy screamed. She looked up at me. "It'll be okay."
"I'm sorry."
"Hi—bye," She said as she grabbed her coat and raced past Mom. The screen door banged closed behind her. "Alex, wait." I heard her yell from the driveway.
Mom's face was a mixture of confusion and disappointment, but she turned away and went to the backdoor. Outside, two doors closed and then Alex's car drove away. Mom walked back into the kitchen. "Do you mind telling me what that was all about?"
I couldn't think of anything to say so I didn't answer.
"Jason, that was wrong in so many ways. First, Cathy is a very disturbed young lady and second, you and Alex are friends."
"It's not what it looked like, I swear."
"How did she get here? Did you bring her home with you?"
"No, her mother dropped her off—I didn't know she was coming." I stepped into the kitchen.
Mom retreated to the sink—her comfort zone. "You called her Izzy—did you think she was Izzy?"
"No, of course not."
"But you were kissing her."
"I, uh was excited about her news and I just kissed her out of excitement."
"News?"
"Yeah, Cathy heard from Izzy, she's fine."
Mom tried to hide her displeasure, but I could see it in her face before she turned back to the sink. "How is she?"
"Uh, well, good I guess."
"I thought you said Cathy—"
"Yeah, well you and Alex came in before she got to tell me very much."
"Seems odd Izzy would contact Cathy and not you. I didn't know they stayed close after Cathy's recent setback."
I slid into a chair at the table. "Sure, they had art together and the whole Emo thing—they kind of bonded I guess you'd say. What you get for dinner?"
"I got you a sub."
"Cool, I'm starved."
"Would you like a sport drink or a soda?" Mom asked as she walked over to the frig.
"Soda's good." I ripped open the bag and when I saw the salad, I got up and got Mom a fork. "You find the kind of flowers you were looking for?"
"Yes, Alex helped me. Say the blessing."
We dug in after the blessing. Mom had her radar on, definitely not buying my explanation. If it went like normal, she would figure it out.
So you think Alex was pissed?"
"Jason, I know you're in sports mode, but you know how I feel about that kind of language."
"Sorry."
"How do you think you would feel if you went over to Alex's and found him kissing Izzy?"
"Yeah, that's what I thought."
"Cathy went with him, so maybe she can explain, although I'm not sure how."
"It wasn't like it looked, I wasn't kissing her, I was kissing Izzy."
"The 'I was excited about her news' excuse was better." She took another bite of her salad.
"Listen Mom, you know Izzy was special, right?"
"Define special."
"She was different, more perceptive."
/> Mom nodded.
"Well, Cathy is… different too. She has this kind of sixth sense you know?"
"No, I don't, explain it to me."
"I don't think I can. Some things you just have to take on faith."
The corners of her eyes tightened with annoyance. She hated it when I threw faith back at her. "I know we came out here to start over, but it hasn't been exactly how I pictured it."
"I know it's been a bit of an adjustment."
"A bit of an adjustment?" Mom choked. "I'm not sure you can call getting arrested, skipping school to run around the country—twice, getting shot and a trip to the emergency room a 'bit of an adjustment'. And lets not forget taking in a border."
"And don't forget your heart attack. Sure, it's been rough at times, but I've never felt more alive."
"You finished?"
"Sure."
Mom stepped on the trashcan pedal and I banked the balled up wrapper from my sub off the lid and into the can. She came back to the table, but walked around behind my chair and wrapped her arms around my shoulders. "I just want what's best for you."
"I know."
"Well, I hope you can work it out with Alex."
"Me too."