Around the Bend

by Britney King

  She smiled to herself. “Maybe.”

  He returned the smile, released the door, and held it open.

  Jess drew a bath and soaked in it until she shriveled up and the water turned cold. She was beyond tired. She was sore and spent. She’d hoped for sleep, but instead, found she only tossed and turned in her bed. A drink would help, but she found the mini bar empty. No doubt it was Myles’ doing. He also held her pills, and though she desperately craved one, the last thing she wanted was to have to ask for it at a time like this. What had she just done? Her husband was gay. Gay. She did her best to think back over her marriage, searching for signs that he was interested in the opposite sex, but nothing apparent stuck out. It was too soon. She couldn’t go there. She was still in shock. The news and the sting, both still too raw.

  In the meantime, a one-night stand or two couldn’t hurt. Sure, she had crossed a few too many lines by having sex with her employee, but, on the other hand, it made her feel something that she hadn’t felt in a long time. Desired. As she dozed off, she wondered how this had become her life. How she’d ended up halfway across the world with an essential stranger dishing out her drugs and a husband that no longer wanted the life they’d had. A husband who’d not only been living a lie, but had taken the last little bit of hope she’d had when he informed her their money was gone. Whether this were true or not, only time would tell.

  One thing was certain though—Jessica realized that she had to get her life together and fast.

  The phone buzzing jarred Jess from her sleep.

  “Hello,” she whispered in the dark.

  “Can I come over?” the deep voice asked.

  “What time is it?”

  “Four in the afternoon.”

  She sighed. “If… you bring me a pill or two.”

  The door clicked and Myles entered her room.

  Jess pulled the covers over her head. “Jesus. I forgot you had a key.”

  “Here.” He placed the pills and a bottle of water on the bedside table.

  Jessica sat up and studied his face. “How did she die?”

  Myles froze. He winced and then sat down on the bed beside her. “Jessica— let me be clear about something. That part of my life is not open for discussion. It isn’t something I want to revisit.”

  She grabbed the two pills and tossed them back. “Got it.”

  “About earlier,” he said, nodding toward his room. “I’m sorry. It shouldn’t have happened.”

  Her mouth gaped open but she quickly recovered. “You woke me up to tell me this?”

  He stood and began straightening the room. “No, it was time for your medication.”

  “You know what, Myles? You can hide all you want to… but you’re no less fucked up than I am,” Jess muttered, throwing the half empty water bottle at his back.

  He turned, picked the water bottle up, and placed it firmly back on her bedside table. He turned to go then stopped mid-stride. “Who’s hiding?” he called over his shoulder. “I’m right next door,” he said as though it were an invitation and then let the door slam.

  Old habits die hard. It was always better to stop these things before they started, he knew. Myles studied the horizon out the window. He was involved enough as it was, and he really didn’t need this in his life to begin with. That woman was a train wreck waiting to happen and he wanted off the ride. The problem was he liked her. The trouble was she liked him.

  Myles sat that way lost in thought until he heard the key card swipe click and his door open. Motherfucker. He guessed it wasn’t the cleaning lady.

  But he didn’t turn to check.

  “I’ll pay you,” she said, slurring her words.

  Myles let out a long sigh. Good God.

  He kept his back to her. “For sex?”

  “Not for sex. That’s illegal. And skanky... and desperate—”

  “I get your point,” he spat, cutting her off. “You need to cut back on the pills. I’m no doctor, but they’re prescribing you more than you need—by at least half.”

  “I know,” she replied flatly.

  He turned halfway. He hadn’t expected that answer.

  “What I meant was I’ll pay you to help me get clean. I know… I know that we slept together and that changes things, but I’m also a little more perceptive than you think about your method of operation. I know your style. You’re in and then you’re out. Pun intended. Now, I get that you may not be emotionally prepared for the work that this job calls for… but you see—the thing is, I could really use a friend right now. And I’m no psychologist or anything… but it appears that we both could…”

  “Don’t psycho-analyze me, Jessica.”

  “Fine. But can I at least ask you a couple of questions?”

  “No.”

  “Myles—please. Play along… just halfway, that’s all I’m asking.”

  She placed her hands on her hips and waited. He studied her face and suddenly, hated himself for the way he was treating her. He relented. “Shoot.”

  “How many women have you had sex with in the past year?”

  “I don’t know. Why—?”

  She cocked her head to the side. Challenging him. “I think you do know.”

  He sighed. “One hundred and sixty-three.”

  Her mouth flew open. “That’s almost—”

  Myles was quick to cut her off. “I know how many it is.”

  Jessica swallowed. “Wow.” He watched as she shifted to balance her weight on her stronger leg. He wanted to go to her, but he didn’t. “Do you still have contact with any of them?”

  He was done with this conversation. Who was she to say whether he was or wasn’t emotionally prepared, anyway? She didn’t even know him. “No. I like sex, all right. No strings attached—sex. It’s pretty simple, actually. I’m safe… I get tested regularly. A number is just a number. So, I have a big appetite?” Myles shrugged. “I don’t see what’s so wrong with that...”

  “I think you do.”

  “This isn’t about me, Jessica. My life is my life and I’m not hurting anyone.”

  She glared at him for a few moments, waiting for him to say something else. And when she realized he wasn’t going to, she added, “Keep telling yourself that,” and walked out.

  Myles dressed, laced up his shoes, and headed to the hotel gym. He figured a run would clear his mind. But after spending an hour pounding the treadmill left him feeling no more clarity than when he’d started, he knew just where he needed to go.

  He headed straight for Jess’s room only to find it empty. Shit. His one job was to watch her and he hadn’t even done that well. This wasn’t that hard and here he was failing again. He dialed her cell. No answer. Myles took the elevator down knowing exactly where he’d find her all the while praying that she hadn’t yet slipped in deeper than either of them could handle. Sure enough, there she was all fancied up, sitting at the bar, legs crossed, in a pencil skirt and six inch heels. Waiting. What he didn’t understand was how a woman recovering from her injuries could manage in heels like that.

  Myles took a seat in the empty chair next to hers. She looked over at him and then away.

  “I’m sorry.” He eyed the glass in her hand. “But please don’t do this.”

  “You’re sorry?” she mocked, nursing her cocktail.

  Myles took the drink from her hand and placed it on the bar. Jess shot him a go to hell look but didn’t move to pick the glass back up. “I know your personal life is in shambles. I know you’re in pain, most of the time. Believe me, I know. But the way you’re managing it is all wrong. You need to let yourself feel the pain. Sit with it a while. Stop doing this to yourself.”

  She shifted, uncrossed, and then re-crossed her legs. “Is that how you do it?”

  “No.”

  “I didn’t think so.”

  “But I’m willing to work on it if you are. I’ve given your proposition some thought… and I’ve decided I’d like to see it through if you’re still game.”
>
  She smirked. “Oh, yeah?”

  He placed his hand on the back of her chair and leaned in. “With a few minor concessions on your part, I think we can make it work.”

  She studied her half-empty glass, and then traced her finger around the rim. “And those would be?”

  “There are a few. But, for starters, you need to understand what pain is. And how to live with it. You’re capable of more than you think…”

  Jess raised her brow. “What makes you so sure?”

  “Instinct,” he said as he stood and reached for her hand. “And the fact that I’ve always liked a good challenge.”

  She smiled. That, he was certainly in for. She pulled away.

  He leaned in closer. “This isn’t going to be easy, you know?” he whispered. She narrowed her brow and considered the implications of what he’d said.

  Myles didn’t wait for a response. He simply grinned, grabbed her arm just above the elbow, and led her out of the bar and back to his room. Pain was a given, she’d just realized. And sometimes, you just needed to give into it—no matter what form it showed up in.

  Chapter Thirteen

  Myles paced the length of his hotel room and checked his watch. Thankful he’d gotten her out of that bar, he realized there were just twelve more hours, and they could get the hell out of this place. The hotel walls were beginning to close in on him, and he had never looked more forward to getting back to the States. Jess stood looking at him, clearly a little unsure what to do with herself. He punched the code into the small safe, then handed Jessica her next dose of medication and walked to the sink to wash his face. He paused and studied her reflection instead. How did someone let a woman like that get away, he wondered to himself? The blessing and the curse was that he knew the answer. No matter how hard you tried, you could never be what they needed. Never enough. A woman like that, and this he knew for sure, would consume you. She’d eat you whole if you let her. But how could you not?

  Myles watched the relief play across her face as the pills slid down her throat. He noticed the length of her neck as she tossed her head back. It was all he could do not to go to her, to wrap his hand around her neck, and to do things to her that he was fairly certain hadn’t been done in quite a while. There was going to be something magical about this one, he understood, as much as he tried to fight it.

  On the other hand, he had an addict on his hands, and while a part of him knew he couldn’t keep doing this, he couldn’t just walk out either. Things had to change, and the way it looked from where he stood, both of them were about to find out just how much they could take. He could do this, he assured himself. Part of loving someone was giving them what they need. He’d planned it out—the next step was to place a call to the agency and set everything up. But first, she’d have to agree.

  “Have a seat,” he ordered catching her eye in the mirror.

  Jess frowned. “You want to talk? I had something else in mind…”

  “Sit down, Jessica.”

  She plopped down in the chair, crossed her arms, and stared out the window.

  Defiance. She was a natural. “If we’re going to do this… if I’m going to stay, then you need to know the rules.”

  She smirked. The rules.

  He lowered his voice. “This isn’t funny.”

  Jess met his eyes, narrowed her gaze, and then looked away.

  “Sit up and have some respect. And look me in the eye,” Myles demanded.

  She frowned but did as he’d asked. “What is wrong with you?”

  “This isn’t a joke. We either do this my way or it won’t work.”

  She kicked off her heels, leaned forward, and rubbed at her toes.

  Myles backed away putting some distance between the two of them. “Do you know what re-socialization is, Jessica?”

  She looked up, clearly caught off guard, and shook her head. “What?”

  “There are generally four types of training techniques used in the re-socialization process. Brutalization, classical conditioning, operant conditioning, and role modeling. I realize this probably means nothing to you right now, but it’s what I need you to agree to—if I’m going to agree to stick around.”

  She tilted her head. “Brutalization? That sounds crazy.”

  “It is crazy.” He eyed her intently. “But it works.”

  Myles sat down on the bed, leaned forward, and rested his arms on his knees. “It’s in part how they break you down in the military.”

  She swallowed. “And you want me to agree to this, why?”

  “You need to get sober. And I need to keep you safe in the meantime.”

  “You mean keep yourself safe?”

  He shrugged slightly. “That, too.”

  “What exactly does this brutalization entail?”

  “Mostly, what it implies.”

  “And what if I can’t do it?”

  He inhaled slowly and let it out. “Then I can’t stick around.”

  Jessica sighed and leaned back in her chair. “You do understand that I’m already in quite a predicament because I gave my power away, right?”

  “This is different. It’s about getting your power back, in a way that serves you. It doesn’t involve money. There are clearly written, agreed upon rules from the start. And of course, this sort of arrangement requires complete trust and open, direct communication.”

  Her eyes widened then relaxed. “Myles. Myles. Myles… what you’re asking is absurd. What I don’t need right now is someone taking anything else from me or telling me how to be. Enough of that has already occurred. My life is a complete fucking mess…”

  “That’s one way to look at it, sure. But this is also giving your life back to you in a way that prepares you to deal with it. Something you haven’t been doing a very good job of—to put it mildly. It’s no different from Basics in the U.S. Military.”

  “So… you’re offering me boot camp?”

  He considered her analogy for a moment and smiled. “With sex added.”

  She glared at him. “Well, when you put it like that…”

  “Look, Jessica… to put it in the simplest of terms, you need to get sober. And more importantly, to get your life together. I need to be able to handle being close to someone again in a way that makes sense for me. Both of these things require a considerable amount of effort and a fair amount of trust.”

  She smiled, and then let it fade. “How much sex are we talking?”

  He leaned back and eyed her from head to toe, his gaze stopping on hers. “As much as you can handle.”

  Jessica raised her brow, apparently satisfied with his answer. “I want to read the rules first.”

  He let his eyes light up, but just briefly. This was going to be fun. “Fair enough.”

  Jessica stared at her reflection in the mirror as Myles stood behind her. She watched as he unzipped her skirt and then took her hand as she stepped out of it. He unbuttoned her blouse, one by one, taking his time. Too much time. The rules could wait just a bit, he’d said.

  “Do you trust me?” he asked as he unfastened her bra and ran his hands over her body.

  She nodded, but when she met his eye, he firmly grabbed her neck and ordered her to focus on her own reflection.

  Once she had, and he was satisfied, he used his foot to gently splay her legs, a hips’ distance apart. “I want to hear you say it.”

  Jess exhaled. “I trust you.”

  “It’s important that you do as I say. If there’s something you don’t want to do or if you want to stop, at any time, just say so.”

  She met his eyes again. He leaned forward and took her chin between his fingers and squeezed. Hard. “Eyes straight ahead.”

  Myles paused for a second to make sure she followed, and then carefully traced his fingers down the side of her body until he reached the scars. He stopped there and then ran his fingers back up again, before trailing back down once more. He lingered over each scar, tracing them one by one. “You’re so beautiful,”
he whispered.

  She looked away. “The scars don’t help any.”

  Jessica froze as his hand landed a swift blow across her ass. She flinched, met his gaze, and then reflexively rubbed at the sting. Myles shook his head slightly, but enough that she noticed, then removed her hand, and firmly placed it back on the sink. “Your scars make you interesting.”

  She swallowed.

  “I want you to say it,” he ordered.

  Jess exhaled letting every last bit of air out that she’d had in her lungs. Another blow. Tears stung at the corner of her eyes.

  She watched him raise his hand to strike again. “I said say it.”

  Another blow, this time to the other cheek. Never in the same spot.

  “Fine! Okay… my scars make me interesting.”

  He looked directly at her, then knelt, and slowly began kissing her ass, sucking and massaging the welts with both his tongue and his hands relentlessly until she practically melted into him. Jess held her breath. It was too much. She couldn’t handle this.

  “Do you need more?”

  Her body and her mind told her yes even though her heart wanted to make it stop. She wanted to say as much. Instead, she let her eyes answer for her.

  “Say, ‘I need more, please.’”

  Her throat had suddenly gone dry. She swallowed hard before eventually getting the words out. “I need more, please.”

  Myles stood, positioned himself behind her, pulled her face back toward him, forcing her to arch her back, just enough to where he knew it wouldn’t hurt. He bit her earlobe, gently sucking it between his teeth, then again a little harder before releasing it and whispering in her ear, “Now, eyes straight ahead. You’re going to watch me show you how beautiful you are.” He pushed into her, slowly, and then all at once. And this time, he was pleasantly surprised to find that she didn’t push back.

  Chapter Fourteen

  Jessica awoke to an unfamiliar ringing sound. She rubbed at her eyes, rolled toward the edge of the bed, and fumbled in the dark before grabbing the receiver. The operator on the other end of the line informed her that a Mr. Clemens was in the hotel lobby and had asked that she meet him downstairs. What in the hell was he doing here? She was both surprised, and yet not surprised.