For Love and Honor

by Jody Hedlund

  “Take the loan,” I said softly. “As my friend.”

  He stared with narrowed eyes at the encampment. For a long moment, he didn’t say anything, and I was afraid he would refuse me again.

  Finally, he gave a jerking nod. “Very well, my lady. I’ll take a loan from you, but only with the agreement that I will repay you in full with interest within five years, or I shall sell you whatever relics or art that your heart desires.”

  “I like that,” I said. “In fact, perhaps I shall have to sabotage your repayment efforts so that I can have my pick of your collection.” Although now that I knew him, I’d have an almost impossible time ever taking anything that belonged to Maidstone.

  He gave a half-hearted smile, one that told me just how much his concession to take my loan had cost. He had wanted to save Maidstone on his own, with his own strength and ingenuity. It was an affront to his honor to take my wealth, even as a loan.

  But we both realized he’d run out of time and other options. He either had to use my wealth to save Maidstone or lose it all, including our lives.

  Chapter

  15

  “NO, YOU’RE NOT LEAVING WITH ME.” I PINNED SABINE with my most severe gaze, but she only pinned one back on me.

  “I’m not letting you ride out by yourself,” she retorted. Upon a mare in the stone gatehouse of the outer bailey, she held herself as regally as a queen. She was attired in the exquisite blue gown she’d worn the first night I’d met her and was wearing her rare blue pearls.

  Everything about her—from her slender cheeks to her long, willowy frame—was beautiful. The bright blue only served to make her radiant, her expression more lively, and her eyes vibrant. How had I missed all of her beauty the first time I’d seen her? Maybe she didn’t have the same kind of golden loveliness as Mother or Lady Elaine, but Sabine was in no way any less striking. In fact, she exuded an inward strength and intelligence that set her apart.

  I’d donned my best garments as well: my finest tunic belted at the waist along with a gold-studded mantle, my gloves that were embroidered with a broad strip of gold down to the knuckles and matching gold buttons at the wrist. Even my black velvet hat was rolled at the brim and decorated with pearls and ostrich feathers.

  As the presiding master of Maidstone, I had an image to uphold. I didn’t want Lord Pitt to think that I was suffering in any way from the siege. I needed him to believe that I was at my best, that I wasn’t afraid, and that he was wasting his time and efforts. Having Sabine ride out with me would add to the aura, and she knew it.

  Even so, it was dangerous. I shook my head again. “Mother has agreed to ride with me.”

  “I told her ladyship that I would go in her stead.”

  How could I resist? After all, it was Sabine’s money I would be delivering.

  My steward had already emptied her chest of silver into ten velvet pouches. It wasn’t enough to pay all of our debt, but it would be enough to assure Lord Pitt we were serious about ending the battle. Even so, there was no telling what he’d do.

  What if he took the silver and then continued the siege regardless? What if he would not be satisfied until he had Maidstone and her treasures in his possession? I couldn’t risk putting Sabine into any more danger than I already had.

  Aldric had stepped forward and offered to bear the white flag of truce. He would ride out alone first, carrying the banner, and hopefully speak peacefully to Lord Pitt. Aldric had insisted that he be the one to carry out the perilous duty. He’d been the one to get us into the predicament, he’d said. And now he’d insisted that he be the first to go out.

  I hadn’t been able to dissuade him any more than I’d been able to dissuade Sabine. He was mounted on one of the remaining horses and was attired in his best as well. He’d groomed himself, tying his long hair back with a leather strip. Although he hadn’t shaven off his beard, it fit him, made him look older and perhaps wiser. At least I hoped he’d grown wiser through the siege. He hadn’t taken a sip of alcohol in days, and he’d labored tirelessly at whatever tasks I’d given him, his every action a request of pardon for his mistakes.

  Although there was a part of me that still resented the troubles he’d brought upon us, perhaps today, in this moment, he could redeem himself.

  As the guards raised the portcullis, it clanked and clattered on the chains that drew it slowly upward.

  I urged my horse next to Aldric’s and clamped him on the shoulder. “God be with you, brother.”

  He nodded, his expression etched in bronze, his dark eyes fixed on the enemy camp. Then, without a word, he moved out of the shadows of the gatehouse and into the sunshine of the open, muddy field that spread out before Maidstone. He lifted his white flag high so that the linen caught the wind and flapped in its fullness.

  My muscles tensed as he urged his steed out into the open, where he would be completely vulnerable and at Lord Pitt’s mercy. I prayed that the neighboring lord would be reasonable. Hopefully, the rain and the mud had dampened his spirit and desire for battle so that he was willing to negotiate an end to the fighting.

  I didn’t realize I was holding my breath until Sabine sidled next to me and slipped her hand into mine. I was grateful she didn’t say anything or offer any platitudes. At a time like this, what was there left to say? Even so, her presence by my side was comforting in a way I couldn’t begin to understand.

  Aldric reined his steed at the halfway point between the castle and the camps, the white flag announcing his peaceable intentions and desire to communicate. We tarried for what seemed hours for Lord Pitt to respond, finally sending a rider dressed in battle armor to meet with Aldric in the center of the field.

  I stiffened as I waited for their conversation to end, and again prayed that God would be merciful to us. We then had to wait again as Lord Pitt’s messenger returned to his camp to deliver the missive and the lone bag of silver to his master and then return with a message of his own.

  At length, Aldric turned his steed and rode back toward the castle, his back straight, his head held high, the white flag still visible for both sides. I spurred my horse out of the gatehouse to meet him, too anxious to hold back any longer.

  “What did he say?” I demanded, pulling my horse up short. The beast stamped sideways and then fell into pace next to Aldric’s.

  “He’s a reasonable man,” Aldric said. “He accepted my apology and the silver. And he will meet us in the middle once more to accept another payment. We’ve agreed to ten armed guards apiece.”

  “Then he’s willing to call off the siege?”

  “I believe so.”

  I wanted to let my shoulders sag with relief, but all eyes from both sides were upon Aldric and me. For now, I would have to remain strong. Everyone was depending upon me.

  As we started out again, I instructed Sabine to ride a distance behind us, and I delegated four of my ten most loyal guards to surround her, with the command that if we ran into any trouble, they would whisk her away as quickly as possible to safety. I also knew they were the caliber of men who would fight to the death to protect her.

  I rode in front with Aldric and the rest of the armed guards. Once again, we reached the muddy center well ahead of Lord Pitt’s men. As the sun glared down on us, containing the warmth of the summer that was due, I couldn’t stop from thinking about how different my life had been last summer, how one year ago I’d left my warring life and had ridden to Ashby to participate in a contest to win Lady Rosemarie Montfort’s hand in marriage.

  In the course of the contest, I’d lost to one of my best friends, Sir Derrick. At the time I’d felt sorry for myself and had rather pridefully assumed I was the best man for Lady Rosemarie. But now I could see that God had prevented me from the union so that I’d be available to help my family when they’d most needed it. And perhaps he had someone better in mind, someone more suited to me.

  Like Lady Sabine.

  I glanced at her over my shoulder. Although her expression said she wasn’t
too happy about having to wait a distance behind, she offered me a smile of encouragement, one that reaffirmed I was doing the right thing, even if it was hard.

  “You love her,” Aldric said softly. It wasn’t a question so much as a statement.

  My gaze snapped back to my brother. Although I couldn’t deny his statement, neither could I affirm it. Did I love Sabine? I’d most certainly felt the heat of attraction to her. I enjoyed her company. I’d been obsessed lately with thoughts of her, especially of keeping her safe.

  But love her?

  “She’s good for you,” Aldric spoke again, so quietly only the two of us could hear. “Just don’t make a mess of things as I did.”

  I nodded, suspecting I’d done a good job of that already. Hopefully, from now on, I would only do better by her.

  Aldric glanced to the far distance, to one of the little walled towns that sat upon Windsor land. “There are rumors that the Duke of Rivenshire is on his way to our aid.”

  “I’d heard a whisper of such as well, but can the rumors be true?” I asked, following his gaze, praying that indeed my old master would arrive with his army. I hadn’t been able to send him a message. The siege had happened so abruptly and entirely that I’d had no recourses.

  “I think that’s another reason Lord Pitt is willing to talk peace,” Aldric said. “He worries his siege days are numbered.”

  “Then perhaps we should retreat and hold out a little longer.”

  Aldric shook his head. “And if the duke doesn’t come?”

  I knew as well as Aldric that this was our only chance of peace with Lord Pitt. If we withdrew our offer now, we would only anger him all the more.

  “I don’t want to rely upon Sabine’s money,” I admitted.

  “You won’t have to for long,” Aldric stated abruptly. There was something about his tone that filled me with foreboding. But before I could question him, a trumpet sounded, announcing the approach of Lord Pitt and his armed men.

  I’d rarely met our bordering neighbor, since I’d been gone so often over the years. On the couple of occasions that I had met him, he’d struck me as a hard but not necessarily cruel man. He rode at the center of his ten-guard unit. Like Aldric and myself, he was attired in garments befitting the master and heir of his estates and vassals. He’d come to impress and intimidate just as we had.

  He was a tall man with graying hair, likely the age my father would have been had he lived a full life. His face was granite and contained a long scar that ran the length of one eye to his chin. When he halted, his gaze swept across Aldric with disgust, as though my brother wasn’t worthy of the title of nobility that he’d inherited. I couldn’t deny there had been times when I’d felt the same way. But there was nothing we could do now but move forward.

  After the preliminaries, Lord Pitt spoke. “I accept the silver and the terms of your peace treaty.”

  Aldric bowed his head.

  “Perhaps you’ll make something of yourself after all,” Lord Pitt said in a voice that was rigid and unforgiving.

  “I was wrong to swindle you out of your fair dealings,” Aldric said, meeting the man’s gaze. “If you must punish anyone for the wrongdoings, then let it be me.”

  I stared between the two with growing confusion. So Aldric had not only gone into debt to Lord Pitt, but he’d also cheated the man? I shifted in my saddle, suddenly nervous. More was happening here than I understood.

  “I pledge you my servitude in whatever manner you see fit,” Aldric was saying, “until the debt is repaid twice over.”

  “What?” I started. Servitude? Debt repaid twice over?

  “In the meantime,” Aldric said in a clear, decisive tone, “my brother’s betrothed, Lady Sabine, has graciously provided the silver that we owe you.” With that, Aldric nodded toward Sabine, who’d slowly inched forward so that she was only several feet behind us.

  I scowled at her to move back, but she wasn’t paying me any heed. Instead she focused entirely on the transaction.

  “We can’t take the silver!” came a murmur from among Lord Pitt’s men. My gaze snapped to the guard who’d spoken. He lifted his visor to reveal the face of one of Lord Pitt’s most trusted guards, Captain Foxe. “The silver’s cursed. It’s the devil’s money.”

  I would have laughed at the absurdity of his statement, except that Captain Foxe’s scruffy, dark face was grooved with fear. His horse gave a snort, as if to agree with his rider, before Captain Foxe reined back.

  Every man on the field turned to stare at Sabine. I expected her to laugh in protest, to call out a witty remark about how ridiculous Captain Foxe was. But instead she sat silently, her face turning pale enough for her freckles to stand out even from a distance.

  “It’s the devil’s silver,” Captain Foxe said again, his tone ringing with worry.

  The guard who’d been at Lord Pitt’s side holding the first velvet bag of silver flung it away, allowing it to hit the ground between our horses and theirs with a splat of mud.

  “There’s no such thing as devil’s silver,” I started.

  “Explain yourself,” Lord Pitt demanded of his captain.

  “I met Lady Sabine when she was on the road to the Windsor estate,” Captain Foxe spoke quickly.

  “So Lady Sabine was right.” My muscles tightened with anger. “You are a thief. You robbed her.”

  The captain shook his head. “I didn’t take a single piece from her. Didn’t want to. Not when her silver is cursed.”

  “What makes you think it’s cursed?” Lord Pitt said, his voiced laced with an exasperation that matched mine.

  “She told me so herself.” Something raw and real in Captain Foxe’s fear told me he wasn’t making any of this up. I had to give Sabine credit for finding a way to stop herself from being robbed. She’d obviously come up with a story about cursed money and had been so convincing that a tough, battle-scarred man like Foxe had fallen for it.

  I glanced at her again, wanting to share a smile, but any hint of humor dissipated at the worried lines that grooved her forehead. She looked frantically around as if searching for a way to escape.

  My own heart began to tap a frighteningly ominous rhythm.

  “She cursed the money herself,” Captain Foxe said, loudly enough for everyone in both parties to hear. “She did it because she’s a witch.”

  Chapter

  16

  I shrank into my saddle, wishing I could disappear. I couldn’t very well deny Captain Foxe’s accusations—not when I’d done everything he’d said. But I also couldn’t sit there without rising to my own defense.

  “The silver isn’t cursed,” I managed, although my voice came out shakier than I would have preferred. “I only said so to keep him from stealing from me.”

  Bennet nodded as though he’d already come to the same conclusion.

  “Don’t listen to her.” Captain Foxe said louder. “She’s a witch!”

  “I’m not a wit—”

  “She’s got the mark of one,” he boomed. “She showed it to us. It’s on her arm.”

  At those words, a silence descended over the gathering that made me shudder. Involuntarily, my hand slid up my glove, and I tugged it higher toward my elbow.

  “My lady,” Lord Pitt said, his tone rising in irritation. “Would you please come forward and prove that my captain is deluded?”

  I didn’t move.

  Bennet nodded at me, his mouth set grimly. “Go on, my lady.”

  “I’d rather not.”

  “You’ve nothing to hide.” His eyes beseeched me to agree with him.

  I had to glance away before he saw the lie there. If only I’d told him the truth when I’d had the chance on the parapet.

  “I beg your forgiveness, my lady,” Lord Pitt said, softening his tone. “I know that my request is rather unusual and I hope you won’t take offense. But for the sake of my men and my people, who are altogether too superstitious, I would ask that you put us at peace by showing us that we have nothing
to fear from your silver.”

  With all eyes upon me, skewering me with their curiosity and fear, I realized I had no choice. I had to do as Lord Pitt suggested. If I tried to get out of it, the enemy camp would share Captain Foxe’s fear, and they would be too afraid to take the silver. We wouldn’t be able to pay the debt and would have to return to the castle disgraced and under siege once more.

  However, if I revealed my blemish, perhaps I could explain what it was, that it was only a birth defect, that it meant nothing evil. Grandmother and I had convinced our most trusted servants of the harmlessness of it. Surely I could do the same now.

  I nudged my horse forward until I stood in the middle of the gathering. A warm breeze blew at my back, bringing with it the waft of new spring grass and the strong scent of mud that oozed beneath the horse hooves. The sunshine on the veil covering my hair was soothing, and several loose tendrils tickled my neck.

  For just an instant, I wanted to turn and ride away. But the gurgling in my stomach reminded me that I’d gone too long without enough to fill my belly. This was no ordinary day. This was the day of our salvation, the day everyone would get to eat again, the day the physician could visit the sick, the day we would be free. I couldn’t ruin it with my cowardice.

  Tentatively I reached for the edge of my glove at my elbow. Then, before I lost all will to proceed, I began to roll it down, one tiny sliver at a time. As I reached the edge of the flaming purplish stain, I stopped. I could feel Bennet’s rounded eyes following my every move. He was waiting like everyone else to discover what was beneath the fabric.

  Now he would know the reality of my condition, why I wasn’t worthy of marrying a handsome man like him. He would see firsthand how flawed I truly was. I swallowed hard and then ripped the glove off in one last yank.

  Each gasp and murmur that erupted surrounded me and tightened like a hangman’s noose before the final squeeze. What did Bennet think? I was afraid to look at him. But at the same time, I was too desperate to see his reaction, to know that my defect didn’t bother him, that he still accepted me as his friend, that perhaps he still wanted to be more than friends.