by Marie Skye
She picked up each girl. “Say see you later to Uncle Hawky.”
I smiled as they both smiled and waved. But, my heart also sank, knowing there’s a chance I would never see them grow up. Was I being selfish for wanting to finish what I set out to do? Willing to put myself on the line. I shut my eyes. I could still hear the blast that knocked me against the wall. The pain behind the little green eyed girl, as she schooled herself to mask it. Her sister trembling, and pleading with me with her eyes for help, before her last breath was taken from her.
The sound of the blade slicing through her skin. She didn’t look scared before he killed her. If anything…she looked relieved. It’s almost as if she prayed for it.
* * *
“Hawkins.”
I felt someone jostling my shoulder, and I jumped. Ambrosia was peering down at me.
“Good to see you, bro.” She gave me a hug before sitting down next to me and ruffling my hair. “Annora’s right. You do need a haircut.” I grunted in response.
She studied me closely. “You feeling okay? You were mumbling in your sleep. Bad dream?”
“Something like that.” I decided to change the subject. “How are things with you and…what’s his face?”
She smirked. “Mark? Yeah, well, Mark thought it was a good idea to fuck somebody else in the bathroom of a bar. So, I decided we were no longer a match.”
My eyes narrowed. I guess I could take time out of my day to get rid of Mark.
“And before you go all big brotherly on me, it was for the best. Besides, he was terrible in bed.”
I covered my ears. “I do NOT want to hear about that. You and Annora are still ten years old to me.”
She rolled her eyes. “Right, Annora the virgin with twin girls.” I shook my head. “How long are you here for?”
I sighed. “Just two days.”
She frowned. “Well, I guess this is better than waiting another year.” She stood up reaching for my hand. “We’ll make the best of it. Come on, let me take care of that damn hair.”
Thirty-Three
Gwen
I had free reign of the Mandrakes’ house. Mostly because they were on their honeymoon, and I told them I would look after Chloe, their cat. So far, she’s doing a good job of doing…well nothing, besides being sassy.
I flipped mindlessly through Netflix, hoping something would jump out at me, but all I kept thinking about was Hawkins. I knew he was gone when I walked in on Grayson telling Emmalin that Hawkins had taken a leave of absence.
As mad as I was at him, I hoped he was okay. I tried spinning this round and round in my mind, that maybe it was me being the selfish one, not wanting him to go. What if this was his actual job, and he was in the military? I would have to deal with deployments, and him going away to long trainings, or whatever they did. So why was this any different?
Because, it wasn’t his job. It wasn’t his job at all. My phone rang, and I reached blindly for it.
“Hello.”
“Gwen?”
I froze, and lifted the phone to look at the number. Unknown. I swallowed thickly.
“What do you want?” I said it more shakily, then I intended.
He sighed. “Where’ve you been hiding? I came to your place and you weren’t there.”
My hand tightened around my phone. “That’s none of your business, Blake.”
He laughed. “Your friend came to see me, and I must say, Gwen, I didn’t appreciate his little visit.” He was talking about Hawkins. I knew Hawkins said he was taking care of it, but I had no idea what he did. “I got fired from my job. Did you know that?”
I slowly shook my head, even though he couldn’t see me. “No, I didn’t.”
“Yeah, thank your friend for that.”
I heard him lighting up a cigarette. “You fucked me over, Gwen.”
The line went dead. All I could hear was the blood rushing through my ears, and my heart beating a hundred miles an hour. He didn’t know where I was, but he knew where I worked, where I lived. I took a deep breath, as I set my phone down. Blake wouldn’t do anything crazy. He’s not the type. He may threaten, and have pushed me around before, but he wouldn’t go to the extreme. He just wouldn’t.
I kept saying that, so I would believe myself.
A week later, I finally moved back into my apartment. Emmalin and Grayson both let me know that I could stay with them as long as I needed to. It was sweet of them, but they were newlyweds. They needed that time together. Plus, I could tell Grayson was trying to be patient, not having Emmalin’s full attention completely, and the last thing I wanted was to cause a riff.
Luckily, Grayson had a key to Hawkins’s place and arranged for my things to go back to my apartment. I didn’t even have to lift a finger.
“Okay, is that everything? Do you want me to stay the night with you?”
I glanced around my living room. Boxes were all around, and I had no idea where to start. Emmalin had already started helping me unpack, and with her help, my closet looked magnificent, not to mention color coordinated.
“I’m good. Go home to your husband. I know he wants you all to himself.”
Emmalin hesitated, and I went over and wrapped my arms around her. “Thank you for all that you’ve done for me. You have no idea how much I appreciate it. Now go home to your husband. I know he’s dying to take you on every surface now that I’m not there.”
Emmalin giggled as she headed for the door. “Okay, but if you need anything call. I mean it.”
I nodded as I locked the door after her. I turned around and surveyed my apartment and sighed. I should be happy. I’m independent, living on my own, I have a job. Everything is in order. Yet, why was I so sad. I slid down the door with my knees to my chest. The tears that I’ve held since I walked out on Hawkins, and kept stored away for weeks, finally fell.
Thirty-Four
Gwen
A week had gone by, and no word from Hawkins. I couldn’t stop wondering if he was okay, and more importantly, would he come back home?
“Gwen, are you good closing tonight? The babysitter just called, and my daughter is throwing up again.”
I looked at Sheerah, who looked distressed. I waved her off. “Go. I got this. Besides, we have no customers, and we only have an hour left.” She waved goodbye as she left. I continued filling up the shakers, and making sure the daily special was written on the board for tomorrow.
All I had left was the trash. I looked at the two big bags and groaned. I hated taking out the trash. Not because it’s trash, but because the dumpster is in the alley. It’s creepy back there. Especially when it’s dark.
I made sure everything was locked before grabbing the bags, and heading out the backdoor, locking it as I stepped out. I looked towards the dumpster. “Hmm, that’s weird, it’s further away than normal. They must’ve just forgot to put it back.”
I hauled the bags down to the dumpster. I got one in, and when I went to grab the second, I heard a noise, and I froze. I looked around me, but there was no one there. I shrugged it off, thinking it was a rat or something.
Right when I went to pick up the second bag, I was grabbed from behind.
My mouth was covered as I tried to scream for help. Suddenly I was thrown to the ground, landing on a pile of broken glass and who knows what else. I tried to crawl, but was knocked back down when a steel toed boot kicked me straight in the stomach.
All the air left my body as I struggled to breathe. My assailant picked me up by my hair, and slammed me face first into the pavement.
I screamed out, and my mouth was muffled again. I felt my skirt being yanked up, and my panties ripped off, and panic started to overcome me. He was going to rape me. He was going to rape me and kill me. I managed a swift kick in his balls, which delayed him, and I was able to get up. I started to scream for help again, and was thrusted up against the brick wall. My arm was twisted behind my back, at such an angle, my shoulder got pulled out of socket, which caused me to scream.
/>
“Fucking bitch!”
That’s when I heard the voice. Blake. I continued to struggle, as he put all his weight against me, then I heard the sounds of a knife. My eyes went wild as I bit down on the hand covering mine, and he screamed, which only pissed him off more, and I was backhanded so hard I flew back.
"You just couldn't do what I said, could you?! I lost everything because of you!" He held my hair so tightly my scalp was burning. He threw me back on the ground. I grabbed a piece of broken glass, and when he came at me again, I turned and slid the glass across his face, making a gash.
He felt his face, at the blood coming out. The cut wasn't deep enough. His eyes turned even wilder. "You fucking bitch!" Before I could move, I was kicked again, this time in my chest. After that, I felt like I couldn't breathe, and was gasping desperately for air.
"You know, Gwen, you really disappointed me. I honestly don't even know what I was doing with a cunt like you. You disgust me..." He kept talking. Each time I tried to breathe, a sharp pain took over my body.
While he kept talking, I heard laughter in the distance. I need to get their attention. But, every time I opened my mouth no sound came out. I took a few shallow breaths, and with all my strength, I let out a bloodcurdling scream, that I prayed got the attention of the passersby’s.
Suddenly a light came on. He looked up at the glow, and quickly turned around and ran. Blake suddenly froze as someone yelled out. "Is someone there?"
Blake gave me one last cold look before disappearing into the night. I slumped against the ground. I lay there panting, covered in blood and God knows what else. I tried moving, but sharp pains throughout my body won over instead. Everything started spinning.
“Hello? Someone there?”
I heard the voice, but I couldn’t get to the voice. Spots started forming in my vision, and I struggled to get up. Right when I heard what sounded like a door creaking to close, I managed to yell out something.
“Here!” I braced myself against the dumpster and tried to bang on it for attention. “I’m here…. I’m here.”
Please find me. Please find me. Please find me....
“Jesus fuck! Connie call nine one one! Hey. Hey we’re going to get you some help, okay.”
I nodded. Or at least I think I did. Then everything went black.
Thirty-Five
Hawkins
I’ve been off American soil for a week now. In a weird way, I kind of missed being all around this. These men were my brothers. We fight together, we die together.
“Michaelson.”
I turned toward the man walking to me, and he extended his hand. A quick look on his uniform told me this was Major Landish, the man assisting with this mission. “Good to finally meet you, Garrison has told me all about you.” Like what? How we’re here because I fucked up? “I’ve seen your credentials, pretty impressive.”
I straightened. “Yes, Sir. Thank you.”
He paused, like he was going to say something else, but instead gave me half a nod, then walked away.
“Don’t worry, he’s like that with everyone.”
My eyes darted to Garrison. “He’s quiet, very reserved, but he’s smart.” Garrison walked away checking equipment. It was an eighteen-hour flight, and the jet lag was starting to get to me. We had six hours before we had to move.
“Where’s your head at, Michaelson?”
I froze. “I’m good, Garrison. I don’t need to be checked on.”
He watched me as I started checking my inventory. After a few minutes of feeling his stare, I finally looked up. “Do you have something to say?”
He stood over me. “Just making sure you’re clear. If you’re going to be here, then I need you a hundred and ten percent. We all do.”
My eyes steeled into his. “I know how important this mission is. You don’t think I know that? You don’t think I have to live with the fact that men died because of me? That I couldn’t bring those little girls home to their families! I’m very fucking clear, Garrison. If you’re having doubts about me on this mission, then tell me now. You asked me to be here, remember?”
Garrison didn’t move. He finally crossed his arms, and then walked off. I sharply exhaled. What the fuck was that? I was here to do a job. I knew what I had to do. I went over to my duffel bag to pull out some items of clothing, and a folded piece of paper fell out. I knew what it was. A note that Gwen had left me a few weeks ago, that I carried around. She wrote something simple, yet it was so sweet.
You’re my favorite person today.
I traced over the words. She was my whole being, and I did the one thing I said I would never do. I broke her heart.
“We only have one shot at this. Just. One.”
I surveyed the men around me. Each one of them were willing to put their lives on the line to save the innocents.
“Twenty minutes. I want every single one of you to go home when this is over. May God, bless you.”
Cheering eluded after the speech. I was trying hard to focus, but I couldn’t. I was here, but at the same time I wasn’t. I was getting my gear together, when my name was called out.
“Michaelson!”
I straightened immediately. “Sir.”
COL Andrew walked toward me. The look he gave me wasn’t good.
“Sir?”
He took a deep breath. “I need you to come with me.”
Before I could ask what for, he abruptly turned and left. I glanced around at the other men. Some were paying attention to me, and others were goofing off. I set my duffel down, and headed down the hall toward the makeshift office.
“Yes, Sir.”
COL Andrew looked at me and sighed. “You’re not officially on duty. You’re here, because you were asked.” I waited for him to continue. “You are one of the best men out there, and I couldn’t be prouder to have you on my team.”
“Sir. I assure you that I’m ready to complete this mission.”
He nodded, and kept quiet for a minute. “Normally, this isn’t information I would share, no matter the circumstances. However, since you’re not officially on duty, I’m making the decision to inform you, so that you can make your final decision, if you want to continue with us.”
I looked at him confused. “With all due respect, Sir, but I have no idea what you’re talking about.”
He handed me a piece of paper. I took at it, and glanced at it, and my blood turned cold. There wasn’t much on it, other than:
Gwen Lockwood attacked in alley. Collapsed lung. Concussion. Prognosis: TBD
I stared at the words on the paper, and everything became white noise. I didn’t know how long I stared at that paper before I realized COL Andrew was calling me.
“Michaelson. That came through for you. The decision of whether you stay is yours. If not, there’s a helicopter ready to take you to a plane.”
I stared back down at the paper. I wasn’t there. I wasn’t there to protect her.
I chanced a glance at COL Andrew. “Get me to that plane.”
Thirty-Six
Gwen
Voices were all around me. I could hear them, but I couldn’t see them. I tried opening my eyes, but I couldn’t. I’m tired….so tired. Do they know I’m here? I tried to open my eyes again.
“How long has she been out?”
Is that Emmalin? Emmalin is here. Thank God….and…. she’s crying. Why is she crying? I’m right here, Emms. Just look at me, I’m here.
But my lips couldn’t move. My eyes wouldn’t open, and I was still.
“I’m staying.”
“Emmalin. Just for a little while, okay? I don’t want you stressing yourself out, now that you’re…”
Now that she’s what? What was going on?
“It’s not just you anymore, remember that.” Grayson spoke in a soothing voice, but Emmalin had other plans.
“I said, I’m staying.”
Her voice sounded hard. If I could smile right now I would. I smiled. Well, in my head I smiled
. At least someone was here with me.
* * *
It’s bright. Why is it so damn bright! My eyes! They’re opening.
I struggled to focus on what was around me, until everything became clear. I turned my head to Emmalin. Only it wasn’t Emmalin. It was Hawkins, and he had his head down, almost as if he was praying.
“Ha…”
His head shot up, as I was trying to say his name. “Thank God!” He squeezed my hand tighter. My throat was dry, and I flinched when I tried to take a deep breath. “Don’t try to move. Do you want some water?”
I slowly nodded as he filled a cup with water and placed a straw in it, and allowed me to take small sips. After a few seconds, I pushed it away, and he sat next to me, brushing strands of hair away from me.
Just then a nurse came in.
“She just woke up.”
The nurse nodded, going over to the machine to check vitals. A doctor came in soon after.
She smiled, as she read over the chart. “Welcome back, Ms. Lockwood. How are you feeling?”
I didn’t know how to answer that. “What happened?” My throat croaked as I spoke.
“Do you know where you are?”
I glanced around the room. “Hospital?”
She nodded, writing something down, as if that was the answer to a test I didn’t know I was taking. “Gwen, you were attacked a day and a half ago in an alley. Some people walking by heard you scream.”
Everything came flooding back. Me taking out the trash, and then Blake appearing out of nowhere. “How am I?”
“You’re going to be sore for a good while. You had a collapsed lung, as well as three broken ribs.”
I felt myself tearing up. “You’re going to be okay, Gwen. We’ve set you up with morphine, and if you need anything, just give us a call.”