Suddenly Us

by Marie Skye

  Gwen

  Six Months Later

  I was tying a bow around a mason jar, when Hawkins wrapped his arms around me. "Those look nice. I had no idea you were this creative." Hawkins picked up one of the miniature mason jars and studied it.

  "Well, it's amazing what you can do when you spend hours on Pinterest, planning a wedding. Trust me, I’ve had more failed attempts, as opposed to good ones."

  Hawkins, gently placed the jar down. "You're having brunch with the girls?"

  I nodded. "One last brunch, before I'm Mrs. Michaelson."

  Hawkins kissed the top of my head. He was quiet for a moment, and I already knew what he was about to ask me.

  "Are you sure?"

  I turned to look at him over my shoulder. "Very sure." He nodded before leaving. Hawkins asked me if I was sure at least twice a day. When we started planning our wedding, I was adamant about not having either of my parents there.

  "I just don't want you to regret this decision, Dove."

  I rolled my eyes. "So now you're taking their side?"

  "Of course, not, I'm on your side one hundred percent. I just, don't want you to have any regrets later, and wished they were there."

  I laughed. "I don't think I'll regret it, trust me. Besides, your mom will be there, and that's enough mom for the both of us."

  I did invite Tara, since she really didn't have a part in this whole fuck up. Yeah, we were never close, but I at least wanted some kind of a relationship with her.

  * * *

  Isabella was already at the table when I arrived. "Good to see you!" I gave her a quick hug before sitting. "Emmalin is on her way."

  Emmalin and Grayson had been on edge these past few months. When Emmalin went into labor three months early, no one was sure if the baby would survive. But, after weeks of being in the Neonatal Intensive Care Unit, she's home.

  I peered into Isabella's glass. "What are you having, that looks good?"

  "Blueberry mimosas."

  I frowned, and motioned for some lemon water instead.

  Just then, Emmalin came in, looking flustered, carrying baby Emersyn. "I'm sorry, I had to bring her. Grayson got held up in a meeting."

  I held out my arms. "Give me that baby."

  Emmalin practically shoved her in my arms as she took a seat. "She's welcome at our brunch. Besides, she's a good baby, unlike my sister's little assholes. Those little bastards are horrible."

  Emersyn cooed at my finger when I tapped her nose.

  "So, big day tomorrow! No more moving the date again?"

  I couldn't stop the smile on my face if I wanted to. I originally wanted to wait a year, before getting married, but after a few months, we moved it up. "It's all been so surreal. Hawkins has been nothing but supportive. He's even involved with the wedding planning. He was actually studying two shades of yellow that looked identical, and wanted to know which one would I pick. I told him they looked the same, and the look he gave me was priceless."

  Emmalin shook her head. “Well goodness Gwen, it’s almost as if you don’t care hard enough about your own wedding, to decipher two shades, of the exact same color.

  We all laughed as we ordered more drinks, since we weren’t ready to order food yet. Emmalin looked at Emersyn in my arms and sighed. "I don't want her to grow up."

  Isabella reached her arms out for Emersyn, and I gave her over. "Don't worry. You have less than twelve years before she becomes a teenager, and starts hating you."

  Emmalin rolled her eyes. "I'm glad you guys are so good with her. It's good practice." She winked.

  Isabella instantly shook her head. "No. None for me, thank you. I have enough trouble dealing with Chace. And he's like a man child."

  Emmalin looked to me. "What about you? You and Hawkins planning a family? His family has twins, right? Oooh, Gwen, what if you had twins?!"

  They both started laughing, and I just sat there with a smile, and shrugged. "Pretty soon, Emersyn will have a play date."

  I said it nonchalantly as I opened my menu. I could feel both Emmalin, and Isabella staring at me. I finally glanced up, looked them both in the eyes, and tried miserably at hiding my smile.

  Emmalin gasped and covered her mouth. Tears were welling in her eyes. "Is that why you guys moved the wedding up?!"

  I shyly nodded, and felt myself tearing up. Happy tears, of course, as they both gave me hugs. "I'm so happy for you!” Isabella looked back at our waitress. "Mimosa's all around,” then she paused. "Make one virgin."

  "Dibs on Godmother!" Emmalin shouted out.

  Isabella looked at Emmalin in shock. "You can't just call dibs!"

  "Why not? They're practically together because of me! And, you know the rules, you have to be in the room to call dibs.”

  Isabella rolled her eyes, but still smiled. We finished up lunch, as we sat and talked, and reminisced.

  "How do you know when you've found your soulmate?" Isabella asked with wonderment in her eyes.

  Emmalin thought for a moment. “When you realize, you found the person that you want to fight with, for the rest of your life, and that no matter what, you’ll still love them unconditionally.”

  I squeezed her hand. “I think Hawkins and I just knew. One day we were torn apart and broken inside. And the next, we were us again, because we found each other. We were suddenly us again, and it just felt right."

  Epilogue

  Hawkins

  One Year Later

  If someone had told me a year and a half ago, that I would be married with a set of six-month-old twins, I would’ve never believed it. Yet, here I am with my beautiful wife, and identical twin girls, Lynette and Adira. That’s right. I’m literally surrounded by girls, which means I never win.

  But there’s a win for me since I can tell them apart. Mostly due to the fact that Adira has a tiny freckle just under her eye. If that wasn’t there, then I would probably be fucked.

  “What do you think about getting a puppy?”

  I looked up from my laptop to Gwen standing in the doorway of my office. She had on my shirt, and one of her many pairs of thigh high socks. Her hair was loose and wavy, and fuck me, she had on her reading glasses. She knew that whenever she had those damn glasses on, I was practically putty in her hands. And she knew it too well.

  She placed a hand on her hip, and the light hit her ring just right, as she toyed with a piece of her hair. I closed my laptop, and moved it off the desk. I decided months ago, that anytime the girls were asleep, Gwen and I would be fucking. I glanced at the baby monitor on my desk. Each baby had a miniature camera above their cribs, and both twins were sleeping peacefully.

  I leaned back and laced my hands behind my head. “Come here.”

  She didn’t move. “Do you think it’s too soon? Or maybe a kitten. They seem to love Emmalin’s cat, Chloe. Adira practically goes nuts when she sees her.” She bit her lower lip as if she was contemplating the pros and cons of getting a pet.

  I sighed as I got up. She wasn’t moving fast enough. I pulled her to me, and she yelped, as I picked her up, she wrapped her legs around me. “What are you doing?”

  I cleared everything off the desk in one swipe, before placing her on top of it, and pulling her shirt over her head. “You know the rules, when they’re asleep, I’m buried inside of you.” She hissed as I moved her panties to the side and started rubbing her clit with my thumb.

  She reached for my belt, quickly unfastening it, and slipping her hand inside my pants and squeezing my cock. I moaned in her neck, as she took my cock out. “They’re asleep all the time. They’re babies.”

  I lined myself up at her entrance, and bottomed out in one thrust, and held myself there, feeling the warmth of her pussy spread through me. The moment we found out Gwen was pregnant, I promised her that we were not going to be one of those couples that never had sex, because they had kids. If anything, I think we had more sex now.

  My hands gently cupped her breast, and I lightly pinched her nipples. Because, she was brea
stfeeding, she was more sensitive. As soon as Gwen was given the all clear to have sex again, I practically mauled her in the car.

  Waiting until we got home, just wasn’t going to work for me. Luckily for me, a Mandrake Tower and Resorts was five minutes from her doctor. Being on Grayson Mandrake’s payroll gave me unbelievable perks.

  As soon as the door to our suite closed, I couldn’t get her clothes off fast enough. She wanted it hard and rough, but I wanted to be as gentle as possible. That was also the first night, I discovered that I liked breast milk. Gwen was so primed up. At first, she didn’t realize what was happening, then once it clicked, she completely freaked out, and was in tears.

  “You’re taking food from our daughters! How could you?”

  Gwen was on the bed, with her arms around her, trying to cover herself up. I tried reasoning with her. “Dove, it’s fine. It’s normal.”

  Her eyes grew wide, as she looked at me, like I just said the most revolting thing ever. “How could you possibly know that?” She threw the nearest object at me, which just so happened to be the remote control. I barely ducked in time.

  She reached for her phone. “I need to call Dr. Vor!”

  I sighed, as I ran my hand through my hair. I was getting cock blocked by a doctor. “Why?”

  Her head snapped toward me. “To tell her what you did!” She got off the bed, and headed to the bathroom, and locked me out.” I braced my arms against the door, as I listened to her on the phone, demanding to speak to the doctor, right away, because it was an emergency.”

  Needless to say, it took a lot of convincing, to coax her out of that bathroom. But that didn’t stop me from playing with her nipples during sex. She eventually came around. Tying her to the bed may have had something to do with it.

  I made a promise to Gwen. No more missions. My mission was done the moment I took Hadiya home to her family. Gwen, even helped me get through the PTSD, with the help of a counselor. Now my mission in life is to make my wife and our two girls as happy as possible. I wouldn’t want it any other way. Every day, I ask myself how did, I get so lucky? I didn’t know I was looking for Gwen, until I looked up. Suddenly she was there. And she was everything I wanted. And suddenly, my life made sense.

  You didn’t think Grayson and Emmalin’s story was, over did you? What’s one thing authors like to do? We like to fuck shit up. Here’s a sneak peek, for the ‘Untitled Graylin Project.’

  Untitled Graylin Project

  Hawkins

  I poured my second glass of water, and took another drink. My ankle was crossed at the knee, my foot swinging back and forth, doing nothing to hide my nervousness. "So, how does this work exactly? I tell you something about me, and then you tell me if I’m crazy or not?” I lightly chuckled, as Dr. Klein gave me a light smile.

  “We don’t have to do anything, or talk about anything you don’t want to.”

  I took a deep breath, as I stared at my hands which were now shaking. Grayson, met with Dr. Klein to help him with his anger issues. He then, had Emmalin start seeing him as well, to help her cope with what happened to her, during her childhood. He, was also a therapy for them, before they married. I continued to stare at my hands. I didn’t know what to say.

  I finally met his gaze. “I have dreams sometimes.” Dr. Klein nodded, as he waited for me to continue. I ran my hand through my hair. “They’re so real. Hell, sometimes I think they are real. I feel like I could still smell the smoke, and the stench of the dead, all around me.”

  I watched as Dr. Klein, scribbled something on his pad. “Can you recall the last dream you had?”

  Of course, I could. That was the fucking problem. I could recall every single dream I had, in vivid details. I shut my eyes briefly. “I was running. There was an explosion, and I was running from that.” I took a moment before continuing. “As, I got further away from the explosion, I felt myself starting to slow down. The bottom of my shoes was sticky; as if I was stepping on gum. At first, I didn’t know what it was, but the more I ran, the heavier my feet got. It was like there was lead in my shoes. I reached a bend, to duck for cover, and finally took a second to check the bottom of my boots. I wish, it was gum, I was running through. It was blood.”

  I thickly swallowed. “I finally looked to the direction I was running from. I was so focused, on trying to save myself, that I never noticed that I was literally running through dead bodies that were piled up. The field was covered in spilled blood. And, I never realized what it was, until I reached the end.”

  I saw Dr. Klein nod out the corner of my eye. “Are the dreams getting worst?”

  I shrugged. “Believe it or not, that was actually a good dream. They’re usually more dramatic than that, if you will.”

  “The dreams you have. Are they shades of events that happened from when you were deployed?”

  I sighed. “Sometimes they are. It’s always at the same place, but the dreams, they seem out of order for some reason I can’t explain.”

  “What about triggers? Anything in your day-to-day life, that could possibly make the dreams worse than they were?”

  I slowly shook my head. “The only thing that’s changed in my life was putting Gwen in it. She knew that I was in the military, but I’ve never opened up to her about it.”

  “And why is that?”

  I exhaled sharply. “Fuck, I don’t know. I guess I don’t want to involve her in my shit. It shouldn’t be her problem that I have issues trying to control my PTSD. That’s a sure-fire way to chase her off. I don’t want to subject her to it. I wouldn’t know how to explain it. Tell me Dr. Klein, how does one start a conversation with, ‘Hey, I was deployed, and I felt so fucking guilty about what happened to my men, that one day I drank half a bottle of tequila, and had a rifle under my chin.” I felt my eyes welling up with tears. “I thought about pulling it. I wanted to pull it. I saw shit, one should never have to see. One day you’re off, fighting to save innocent people, and the next you’re home. You’re just home. You’re supposed to live this real and carefree life, that just doesn’t exist.”

  “You still feel guilty about what happened. That’s quite normal Hawkins, but you can’t let it overtake you. You’re a married man now, with a beautiful family. They need you.”

  I smiled at the thought of him mentioning my family. “I love them. They’re my whole reason. Gwen, my girls. They help. Even on days when I turn on the news, or get updates from my old team, they help me get through it.”

  “You’re doing better Hawkins. You’ve been seeing me now for three months, and you’ve made a lot of progress. With your permission, I would like to have you link up with other men and women, that’s fighting the same fight as you.”

  I was skittish about that suggestion. The last thing I wanted to do, was to be in a room with other people suffering like me, pretending their life was peachy keen.

  He handed me a card. “You can say no, but I think it’ll be good for you.”

  I placed the card in my pocket, and stood up. “Same time next week?”

  I nodded, as I shook his hand. Dr. Klein chuckled. “You are definitely friends with Grayson, that’s for sure. You’re both stubborn, and hot headed, and would do anything for the one they love, yet always forget about themselves.”

  I rushed home, hoping I could be there in time, to at least put the girls down. Gwen, was just coming out of their room, when I got in. She pointed towards their door. “They finally fell asleep.”

  I frowned. Gwen laughed. “Don’t worry, I’ll allow you to get up with them when they cry in the middle of the night. That job is all yours.”

  She flopped down on the couch, seemingly drained. I sat next to her, and put her legs on top of my lap, and she moaned as I started massaging her feet.

  “You, know I love that sound.”

  She smiled at me sleepily, before yawning. “You, also love the sound of my mixer blade, because you know, I’m making something yummy.”

  “This is true.” I leaned over, kissing
her softly.

  “How was therapy tonight?”

  I thought for a second before nodding. “Good. He suggested going to a group meeting with other people experiencing PTSD.”

  Gwen, placed her hand on mine. “I think that would be good. I’ll go with you, if you want.” I kissed her hand, then traced over her ring. I started to laugh. “He said, I was like Grayson, being stubborn.”

  Gwen’s smile quickly faltered, and she sighed, before leaning her head back. “I talked to Emmalin today.”

  I continued massaging her feet. “Yeah? How is she?”

  Gwen shrugged. “She says she’s fine, but I know she’s not. She’s struggling, and I feel so helpless.” Gwen wiped a tear from her eye. “I don’t know why I’m even crying, I just feel so bad for her. I wish things were different.”

  I wiped another errant tear, from her face. “It’s because no one saw any of this coming. If, I was to bet all the money in the world, I never would’ve bet that Emmalin would be filing for divorce.”

  She gave me a sad smile. “None, of us did. All, we can really do now, is be a friend.” Gwen smiled, as she wiped more tears away. “I still have hope for them you know? I still have hope, even if she doesn’t.”

  I nodded, as Gwen changed positions, and I pulled her closer to me. “We all do Dove. We all do.”

  After Gwen fell asleep, I went to Mandrake Towers. I knew, Grayson was staying in his office apartment. I didn’t even have to knock on his office door. He was working, even though it was almost midnight. His eyes met mine, when I knocked before coming in.

  His hair was in disarray, as if he ran his fingers through it a hundred times. He was unshaven, and his suit, that was always in perfect pristine condition, was completely wrinkled, as if he slept in it, and didn’t give a fuck what anyone thought.

  “Hawkins. What’s going on? Everyone okay?” He looked concerned, before I held up my hands.