I Love You to Pieces

by Lori Flynn

  “I didn’t mean to startle you.” He seemed riveted to the center of the room. “I loved and respected Catherine.”

  All so civilized, she could barely remain vertical. She felt her face flush; her heart beat against her ribs. If she could unclench just one of her fists, she might take Delila’s suggestion and chuck a wine bottle at his head.

  “That’s it? That’s all you’ve got for me?”

  He narrowed his eyes. “Sorry for your loss?”

  “Coward!” Olivia spat. He’s confused. He expected me to collapse at his feet. I’ve changed. He missed it.

  Ben scrubbed a hand over his face when Jill, Melody, and Gordon skidded into the room. “Now that the cavalry’s arrived, I guess I’ll leave.” Ben’s tone was cool, but his warm eyes tracked her.

  “Need help finding the door, Mr. Thornton?” Gordon asked.

  “I know the way,” Ben answered through his clenched jaw as he stalked out. Olivia nudged Ben from her thoughts until her guests were long gone and clean-up crews had worked their magic. Escaping to the isolated beach, she relaxed on the cool sand and welcomed the foamy water washing over her legs. She found small comfort that her grandmother was happy about going home to be with the Lord.

  I can’t decide which is worse: hearing Ben’s apathetic speech or watching him walk away—again. If I’ve changed, then why does this still hurt so damn much?

  Chapter Sixty-Six

  Olivia

  Olivia struggled with her grandmother’s last wish, since mourning her came as naturally as breathing. Dr. Coffield had warned her grief would take its course. Cards and flowers arrived persistently, daily reminders of her loss.

  Walking the beach, she imagined her grandmother and father beside her, rehashing their day. She longed for comfort in their reunion, to shake the feeling of being left behind like driftwood, detached and isolated.

  The cell phone’s incessant pinging jarred her. She glanced at the screen and, seeing Gordon Shepherd’s name yet again, pressed delete. He’s not grasping this friendship thing, considering he’s been just showing up for runs on the beach. I thought he was gonna hump my leg when I said that, except for Dr. Coffield, the only males I can tolerate in my life right now have four legs and fur.

  Olivia patrolled the shore, shadowed by Buckley, followed closely by Webster, with Lily slowing to play in the foamy water. They turned back when Casa Nonna became a blur over her shoulder. When she bent to lift the yawning beagle, her phone accidentally tumbled into Webster’s waiting mouth.

  He eluded Olivia’s tackle, leaving her face down in the sand. In an NFL-worthy sprint, Webster hauled his prize away.

  “Come back here!” Olivia shouted, struggling with Buckley and Lily, deflecting them from licking the sand from her face. A hardy laugh bubbled from her lips until a familiar voice startled her.

  “Looking for this?” Ben asked. He held the sand-covered, dog-chewed phone. “Not sure if it’ll still work.”

  Olivia squirmed to sit up, her vision clouded and gritty. It’s finally happened. I’ve lost the rest of my mind. It wasn’t until she touched the hand he’d extended to help her to her feet that she truly believed he was there and not some figment of her creative imagination guaranteeing her another stay at Palm Haven. She drew back her hand and stood on her own.

  Ben’s eyes narrowed as he held out the phone.

  After blinking several times, she wiped her eyes with the back of her hand. “Thanks. I’m afraid Webster’s developed a taste for these. He destroyed Gordon’s, Dr. Shepherd’s, earlier this week. You met at the funeral.”

  “I know who he is,” he scowled. “How’d Webster get his phone?”

  Olivia hesitated. “He runs with me, thinks I spend too much time alone.”

  “What do you think?” Ben probed.

  Lifting her chin, she hardened her voice. “Why are you here? Am I guilty of tax evasion or some other crime you’re legally obligated to report?”

  He stepped back and winced. “It’s not like that. Catherine appointed me executor of her will. We can take care of it whenever you’re ready.”

  Olivia’s mouth dropped. “Come on! She did what? That’s laughable.” And I would laugh if I wasn’t swallowing to keep from barfing. She licked her lips. “You don’t want to be here, Ben. Delegate the job to a minion at your firm, so you’re free to walk away—again.”

  Turning toward the water, Olivia watched the surging waves brutalize the shore. She braced for his exit and then shivered when his warm breath lifted her hair.

  “You’re wrong. The others—are they talking to you now? What are they saying?”

  She circled back to face him. “You have no right to ask about that.”

  “Don’t I?” Ben’s fists punched toward the sky. “You stuck me right in the middle of this mess and never warned me.”

  “Couldn’t,” Olivia muttered with less bravado, watching her feet sink into the wet sand. “I didn’t have answers.”

  He moved closer. “I believe your grandmother knew what she was doing. Walking away nearly destroyed me. I convinced myself that staying out of your life was best for both of us. Catherine’s death shook me—opened my eyes. I miss you, damn it, and never stopped loving you. Forgive me?”

  Olivia welcomed Delila’s strength and Sophie’s composure as she turned and searched Ben’s face. When his eyes slid to her mouth, it set off a charge that led to an explosion in the pit of her stomach. Get a grip! Use your words!

  “I’m different now. There are no guarantees. If my world implodes again, I need someone who’ll stick around. This isn’t about forgiveness; it’s a matter of trust.”

  He exhaled as if stung by her answer, scrubbing his hand over his face. “I’m not asking for guarantees, just a chance to start over.”

  Olivia long suspected Ben’s fear had been the cause of his absence. She knew firsthand the damage fear placed on the psyche and sympathized. A subtle thought from Sophie reminded her how happy he’d made her. Was another chance too much to ask? And who’s to say he’ll like the person I’ve become? Within moments, Delila’s screw him rang loud and clear. What the hell should I do with that? I need to think.

  “If you’re free for dinner tomorrow night, come back and take care of the reading.”

  “Tomorrow, then,” Ben answered.

  Olivia felt every step of his exit. She gathered her dogs and thoughts and headed home, unsure of what she’d just promised.

  Chapter Sixty-Seven

  Olivia

  “I didn’t have a choice! He ambushed me on the beach.” Olivia paced Dr. Coffield’s office the morning after her encounter with Ben. “He pissed me off. I couldn’t think. He smelled good.”

  “Executor of Catherine’s will?” the doctor chuckled.

  Olivia dropped into the chair across from his desk. “Why’s that funny? You have an odd sense of humor.”

  “Ambushed is a strong word. How’d Ben end up on the beach?”

  “Maria told him where I was when he came looking for me at Casa Nonna.”

  Dr. Coffield raised an eyebrow. “Not much of an ambush. Think Ben strong-armed Catherine into making him executor?”

  Olivia waved a hand in the air. “He wouldn’t do that. And no one ever made Catherine do anything she didn’t want to. All right, I get your point.”

  “What are you afraid of?” Dr. Coffield’s calming voice deepened.

  She took a quick breath. “Ben might not like who I’ve become.”

  “That’s his loss, Olivia. Have Delila or Sophie chimed in?”

  “Not as frequently. Will they ever leave me entirely?”

  He smiled. “The plan’s to integrate—use their strengths. You know that.”

  “I’m gonna miss them.”

  “You realize they’re already part of you?”

  She nodded and turned toward the door. “I’d feel better if you joined us for dinner tonight.”

  “We’ll talk tomorrow.”

  *

&n
bsp; Olivia readied for the evening, battling butterflies in her stomach one minute and having to breathe into a paper bag the next. She chose an off-the-shoulder coral sundress and sandals. Lately, she preferred shorter skirts and higher heels. Would Ben notice the change?

  The dogs announced his arrival, and while it took several cleansing breaths, she descended the staircase without incident. Ben wore an open-necked dress shirt and slacks and moved with restless energy. When he lifted his eyes to hers, her heart beat in her throat. The dogs danced around them as if anticipating a celebration.

  He asked for another chance. “Hello, Mr. Thornton.” Olivia extended her hand. “Thank you for coming. Would you like to take care of business first?”

  He grinned and took her hand. “Yes, and your caretakers, the Garcias, should join us.”

  Olivia nodded. “We can use my office.”

  “Looks like the dogs missed me.” Ben rubbed Buckley’s head while the trio played around him.

  “Dogs love unconditionally,” she said. “They’re always happy to see you.”

  Olivia and Christian and Maria Garcia settled in front of the desk with Ben behind. He explained the legal formalities, such as his fiduciary responsibilities, and then addressed the Garcias.

  “Catherine has bequeathed you the guest house at the east end of the grounds which you both admired.”

  Christian gathered Maria in his arms while she wept. Tears filled Olivia’s eyes witnessing their reaction.

  “We spoke with Mrs. Harding about owning a home of our own someday, when we’re too old to serve,” Christian said. “She told us she’d help. We thought she meant advice.”

  The Garcias left the room, and Ben continued the reading. “Catherine gave Nanny the penthouse apartment at Harding Towers. They’d discussed it. I’ll go by and make it official.”

  “I’d love to go with you.” Olivia noticed a twitch near Ben’s left eye.

  “As much as I enjoy your company, that’s something I should take care of alone.”

  You should do what? “I didn’t realize you took your executor duties so seriously.”

  He slid back his chair and stood. “It isn’t that. I don’t trust Gordon Shepherd. The creep came on to you when your grandmother was gravely ill. Catherine told me some, and I pieced the rest together. I should have my investigator run a background check.”

  Olivia grinned. “Melody beat you to it—called him a boy scout.”

  Ben shook his head. “Doesn’t alter my opinion, and I don’t think Melody likes me. Maybe I’m wrong, thought I heard her use the word wimp at the funeral.”

  Olivia couldn’t keep the laugh from her voice. “You’re not wrong. It’s her favorite pet name for you.”

  Ben scowled and returned to the will. “Numerous endowments were made to your grandmother’s favorite charities. I informed them in the weeks before her passing, as she requested. I made a list. The remainder of the estate pertains to you.”

  Olivia swallowed hard as he dropped down beside her.

  “Catherine enlisted Gretchen’s help and set aside a substantial amount to ensure the Olivia Harding Pavilion for the Rehabilitation of Abused Animals will come to fruition. She believed the work is your heart’s blood.”

  Olivia eased back in her chair. She covered her face with her hands, then swiped the tears from her cheeks. “It’ll have to be a mighty big building just to fit that name. But Grandmother Catherine won’t be here to see it. What does Gretchen think?”

  “She’s thrilled about having a facility of this magnitude and you on board to run it. She’s already begun taking bids from area architects, all awaiting your approval. I was happy to help make it legal.”

  Olivia warmed with the comfort of his nearness. She stopped short of burying her nose in his neck and jumped to her feet, bringing a shaky hand to her forehead. I need distance to help me process.

  “Thanks. My grandmother had a soft spot for you. And Ben, what you said last night about sticking you in the middle, having real feelings is something I’m just now getting used to. So, I’m sorry, I just never considered yours. Forgive me?”

  “I wouldn’t be here if I had any doubts.”

  She smiled, turning away. “Dinner should be ready. Hungry?”

  Ben took her hand and drew her back. “There’s one last thing.”

  “She’s given me enough.”

  “This isn’t from Catherine.” He placed a small white box in her open palm.

  Olivia’s eyes dropped to her hand. Thoughts of a similar offering, not so long before, made her heart race. “Is this what I think it is?”

  “Give me a little credit. The note you sent when you returned my locket said you thought I had a change of heart. You can change a lot of things in life, Olivia, but not your heart. Believe me. I can list them—with spreadsheets. Open it.”

  She removed the lid. The heart-shaped pendant sparkling back resembled the first except for the pave-set diamonds covering its face. On the back was engraved, I’ll Love All of You Always, Ben.

  “Do you get it?”

  “I do. I’ll treasure it.”

  “I love you, Olivia, and won’t abandon you.” He kissed her, first with his eyes, then long, hard, and urgently, until her breath caught.

  His touch inspired confidence. She loved him, knew it since the day he’d taken on her mother. She was stronger. Her courage and determination had grown like a boulder inside her.

  “Let’s start with dinner.” Olivia smiled and pulled him close to her side as they walked from the room.

  Chapter Sixty-Eight

  Olivia

  Olivia leaned back in her overstuffed lounge chair, relaxing on the veranda, soaking up the spring air. She exhaled a contented sigh, ignoring the bitter taste of the herbal tea she sipped.

  Her eyes narrowed, focused on the beach and Ben, taking his morning run—the very same beach where they’d married months before. She recalled the intimate ceremony and small, elegant reception celebrated at Casa Nonna that had played out just as they’d dreamed. Her mother’s omission from the guest list was a gift from the bride and groom.

  Olivia smiled, thinking of the day she’d visited Ben’s office a few months later and revealed the presence of someone new inside her. He’d rushed to her side and, without hesitation, promised they’d face it together. She’d laughed, then cried, and revealed her pregnancy. Ben lifted her into his arms and spun her in circles until she vomited down his back.

  When a sonogram proved it was a girl, they were in full agreement to name her Alexandra Catherine, honoring the two most influential people in Olivia’s life. Already the proud father, Ben kept a framed sonogram picture on his office desk and another in his wallet. His parents Chadwick and Bunny happily postponed their return to Connecticut in anticipation of their first grandchild. With the birth only days away, Jill and Melody arrived, while Ben took hovering to a new art form.

  Olivia gave her belly a protective rub. “I’m so glad you two came for your niece’s entrance into the world.” I’d have been happier if Jill had left her disgusting herbal tea recipe behind.

  “This is the farthest he’s been away from you since we got here.” Melody observed Ben jog along the water.

  Olivia laughed. “He hasn’t been this far since I told him about the baby.”

  “You’re not drinking your tea, Olivia,” Jill scolded. “If you drink it while it’s hot, its herbal powers can bring on labor.”

  “I know you mean well, Jill, and I’d love to have our girl today. Are you sure you don’t mean bring on gagging?”

  The grand opening of the Olivia Harding Pavilion for the Rehabilitation of Abused Animals was officially six weeks away. If she adhered to her due date, she’d be there to support Gretchen fully. Not sure it’s worth drinking this God-awful tea.

  Ben hustled up the stairs surrounded by Lily, Buckley, and Webster. He kissed Olivia gently, and then placed his large hands on both sides of her rounded belly and kissed his daughter.
r />   “It’s time for Ali Cat’s walk,” Ben said, helping Olivia to her feet.

  Melody rolled her eyes. “How long is he going to call her Ali Cat?”

  Olivia smiled. “I’d imagine until his daughter’s old enough to ask him to stop. But I don’t believe she will.”

  With wet sand between her bubblegum-pink toes and the sun high in the cloudless sky, Olivia leaned into Ben’s protective arm. Strong and determined, they’d vowed to break the cycle of abuse.

  “How do you feel?” Ben brushed a gentle kiss on her lips.

  A radiant smile lit Olivia’s face. “I feel everything.”