Caitlin’s jaw dropped. ‘No money?’
‘No, everyone used a barter system.’
‘A what?’ She had to know how that worked. She could not imagine anything without money working here.
‘Well, some cooked, others made clothes, others raised the children and taught, others dealt with security…’ he paused. ‘Actually, the jobs are no different to what people do here. There no-one gets paid. They do their job and in exchange take what they need. I know it sounds strange here, but it worked there. The only thing was some, like me, wanted more freedom.’
She nodded and focused on her mug, her head full of conflicting thoughts. ‘And this place was in the jungle?’
‘The Amazon, in Brazil.’
She found it hard to believe. ‘Wow! That’s a long way to go from here.’
‘It was.’ He reached out and started to trace a pattern on her hand.
It tingled.
‘So, how did you get away from there? I mean, in the vision it looked desolate, as in, in the middle of nowhere.
‘I was attacked and needed to get better.’
‘Attacked by what?’ It must have been something scary, like a panther or a leopard.
‘A tapir.’
Caitlin blurted out some of her tea. ‘A Tapir, what like one of those animals in Dora the Explora?’
Steven gave a slight shake of his head and chuckled. ‘They are more vicious than portrayed in a children’s cartoon. Anyway, how do you know Dora?’
She wiped her mouth with a serviette. It covered her blush as she attempted to brush him off. ‘I have a younger sister remember. Anyway, so what happened then?’
His eyes darkened. ‘So, my grandparents brought me back here. I couldn’t get better there.’
‘Grandparents? Of course, you met your real mum. What was she like?’
‘Like any estranged mother would be, I guess.’ The frown said it all.
She wondered why he could not get better over there. To think she took another sip, then continued. ‘Did you need something you could not get there?’
He looked away. ‘Yes.’
‘Can you tell me what it was?’ If you don’t ask, you don’t get.
‘Not yet. I don’t want to freak you out.’
She did not want to ask again. Something told her it was not something she needed to know. ‘So how come they let you come back here? You’re on your own. Or are we being watched?’ Paranoid, she looked around.
‘No-one is watching us,’ he said. He looked like he suppressed a smile. ‘My grandmother died. Up until she passed away no-one seemed to age or die after the change. Now we know it can happen.’
With childlike enthusiasm, she asked, ‘So what’s the change?’
He finished off his drink. ‘Shall we walk and talk?’
‘Sure,’ Caitlin downed hers and got up.
Once outside, Steven started to talk, lost in his own thoughts. ‘The change is when we become different, without human blood we die. It’s weird to try to explain something that has no logical explanation. I don’t know how much you remember of what my uncle Ian said on that night.’
She pushed her hair away from her face as she considered what he was saying. Did he say uncle? She was sure the men were too young. ‘One of those men was your uncle? They scared me. The truth is I was too frightened to take much in. Tell me again.’
Steven looked ahead as he spoke. They were now heading for the Common, a large expanse of trees, a peaceful place. ‘Okay. Well, a group of them, my mother included, were attacked by infected bats during the Second World War, whilst they were based in Los Alamos, New Mexico. They think the bats were radioactive. Since then they, and any offspring, have needed blood to survive.’
Caitlin stopped walking. ‘Offspring?’
Steven turned back, his expression composed. ‘Yep, people like me…although I am the first to be born half human. Offspring have to feed off human blood to enable them to move from adolescence to adulthood.’
She started to move again, she needed to walk and talk. ‘You kill the humans you feed from?’ she asked, wary. This was going into unfamiliar waters.
He was quiet for a minute or so, the sound of their footsteps just about audible above the sound of traffic. They waited at a set of traffic lights and crossed, then made their way into the common. Large trees welcomed them. Caitlin could hear birds overhead, it was peaceful. It took her thoughts away from the story. It sounded like a story.
Finally, Steven spoke, he sounded reluctant. ‘I’m only telling you this because you asked.’ He paused, and took hold of her hand. ‘Please try to understand and don’t freak out okay?’
‘Okay.’ She did not know what else she was supposed to say.
‘Someone has to die to enable one of us to change,’ he said, his eyes darkened.
‘So, you killed someone?’ she spluttered, wide eyed. She was tempted to let go of his hand, she didn’t.
His head hung low. ‘I’m ashamed to admit that I did. I don’t remember doing it. I was feverish at the time, but that’s no excuse.’
‘So, you are bad?’
Two large crows burst through the trees. The way they shrieked made her think of bats – black, deadly, hungry bats.
***
Caitlin’s expression had changed from one of curiosity to horror. It looked like some of the issues were finally coming home to her. He knew he was being incredibly selfish. He should have left her alone; it was the right thing to do. He just did not want to.
It was uncomfortable to regurgitate Ingrid’s words. It hurt him to think of the woman who found him in the first place. ‘Well, depends on how you look at it. We all kill to survive, that’s the circle of life.’ If Ingrid heard him now he was sure she would stick her tongue out at him. He had never been her number one fan in the community.
Caitlin picked up a leaf from the ground and fiddled with it. ‘I guess human beings are deadly in their own way. We justify death – a lot.’
‘Exactly.’
She cottoned on a lot quicker than he had done. He liked to think she had an ulterior motive for being so understanding. There was a chance she might actually want to be with a monster like him. ‘Anyway, when they realised what had happened, they chose to create a new home for themselves in the Amazon.’
‘In Brazil, was that was the memory you planted in my head last night?’
He smiled and nodded. He was still amazed it had worked.
‘It was actually real? Wow! So, what happened after you arrived? What’s it like?’
Steven chuckled, her enthusiasm rubbed off easily. She seemed comfortable now. Hopefully thoughts of a macabre nature had been shelved, for a while at least. ‘It’s like going back in time. In some respects the community is united in a way that you don’t see here anymore. And yet everything is controlled. No-one is allowed to leave unless they have permission.’
‘Really? You need permission. And they let you go because of the tapir attack,’ she giggled.
Steven scowled and then laughed with her. ‘It really hurt you know. They are not sweet and innocent.’
‘If you say so.’ Caitlin carried on laughing.
Steven laughed along with her, infected. ‘Come here you.’ He eased his arms around her in a warm embrace. Their laughter subsided. ‘I love to hear you laugh.’ He felt pin prick goose pimples on the back of his neck. He was holding Caitlin again.
He pulled his head back and leant in to kiss her. He was glad she did not pull away. The kiss was slow, tender – it made all his nerve endings go awry. He felt himself react and hoped she would not mind, it had been a long time. Caitlin was so special, the last thing he wanted to do was offend or upset her. He pulled his pelvis back as the kiss came to a natural end. He fought against the urge to do more. They held each other for a while, Caitlin’s head on his chest, and her arms around his waist.
He was desperate to know whether he was making any sense at all.
Either way, he relis
hed every second. She was not rejecting him anymore, it was a huge relief.
Caitlin released her arms, pulled back and smiled. It was the smile he had been dying to see every second he had been in the Amazon. He gave her a quick peck. ‘So, what else would you like to do? If I know you at all I know you have more questions.’ He laughed.
‘Do you still need human blood?’
It was just like Caitlin to go for the bull’s-eye.
‘Yes…’
Caitlin’s eyes widened.
‘And…no.’
Her eyes relaxed again.
He held her hand and started to walk again. ‘We think the reason they have lived out there without the need for human blood is because of monkeys. Genetically, they fulfil the same need.’
‘You kill monkeys?’ she gasped, her hand gripped his tighter.
He glanced in her direction. ‘In the same way you kill animals for food.’
It was unsettling to have to tell her everything. He was not sure it was bringing her any closer to trusting him.
All he could do was hope.
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Chapter 32
Explanations
The crisp air made Caitlin shiver. She loved the smell of fresh air, there was nothing like it. She gathered he was a new form of human. He could be dangerous. Supposedly, not in a way that was any different to the way humans behaved. In a way she could not berate him for anything she would do herself to survive. She had not been to the Common for a while; it was a good place to talk. It was spacious and near enough empty at this time of day.
They came to an empty bench. She let go of his hand and took a seat. Her head swirled around like mush. It resembles the decomposing leaves on the ground. ‘You said they didn’t let people leave. Why did they let you go? Why didn’t you have to go back once you were better?’
Steven took a seat next to her and leant his elbows on his knees, his hands clasped together. ‘My grandparents decided to let me come back. They felt guilty about what had happened to my mother.’
The way he kept a straight face made her suspicious. ‘I see, so your mother was forced to return after she had you? Is that why you were raised by your dad? Oh…did she not tell anyone about you? Was that why you didn’t know?’
‘She kept it from everyone. If Ingrid had not found me, I don’t know what would’ve happened.’
‘Ingrid?’
‘Ingrid was here on vacation whilst you were away after Georgina’s death. She figured out who I was.’ He clenched and unclenched his hands.
She was missing something – her brain just had to piece things together. ‘So, this Ingrid told everyone about you. And that’s why your uncle, Ian right, came to get you?’
‘Yes.’
‘And why didn’t your mum come instead?’
‘She is dangerous and erratic. I find it hard to believe she is my mother if I’m honest.’ He gave an uneasy chuckle.
Caitlin frowned. His mother was dangerous. The community had to be kept isolated. ‘It seems weird to come back to see me if you don’t know what you’re capable of. Why didn’t you just leave me? If you love me, like you say you do, why didn’t you stay away?’ Her logical brain usually saw things in black or white, this was a definite case of grey.
She was not prepared for his reaction. His eyes seemed to blur and he froze, as though shaken. She had probably been too honest. She could not possibly understand what he had been through, what his life was like. She could not assume anything. Maybe, she would have to allow some room for grey.
Eyes to the ground, he spoke slowly. ‘I had to see you again, I just had to. I’m sorry if I was spying on you last night. I promise it was the first time I had ever come around. I would not stalk you. I’m not a psycho, at least I try not to be.’ He raised his eyebrows. ‘When I saw your boyfriend leave and I heard you crying, I knew I had to try to tell you the truth. I didn’t know it would work. It was lucky it did. At least, I think it was. Maybe you are right. Maybe I should never have come back. If you want me to leave I will. I will never force you to be with me.’
His little angst ridden speech did make her feel sorry for him. She was just not sure she was ready to let him back in just like that. She had to change the subject – fast. ‘Did you ever see the message I left you on Facebook?’
‘Yes,’ he paused. ‘I’m sorry. I didn’t know what to reply.’
‘The truth would have been good.’ She knew she was being sarcastic, she could not help it.
The way he stood up suddenly came as a surprise. He practically jogged away. Then he stopped and went perfectly still for a minute before he turned and came back, eyes narrowed, hands clenched.
‘That’s what I’m doing or trying to do.’ He kicked some leaves away and looked at her again.
It was a deep penetrating stare – it felt like he was probing into her soul.
‘I’m sorry, my timing is lousy. You only broke up with your boyfriend last night. I had to tell you why he said what he did. It cut me up. You got deceived. You needed to know the truth.’
‘Did you hear me with Daniel?’ As much as she was trying to understand, it made her skin crawl.
He bowed his head. ‘Sorry.’
‘Why would you listen?’ Even though he apologised, it was not easy to understand.
‘I don’t know! It was stupid.’ He run his hand through his hair and then dropped both hands to his sides, defeated.
She did not think he was angry with her, more at himself. He took a deep breath, raised his head and added in a soft, almost pleading voice, eyes fixed on hers, ‘I needed to know if you loved him.’
‘I see.’ She could understand that. He wanted to know if he had to move on. ‘So, you heard me call out your name?’
‘Yes.’ There was a definite twitch on his lips, he wanted to smile.
It was her turn to smile instead. ‘So, I guess I’m not as innocent as I thought I was.’
He sat down again and put his hand on her shoulders gently as he spoke. ‘We never did anything wrong. I never…you remember everything now, don’t you? Do you remember us?’
His hand radiated heat on her shoulder.
She fought the urge to snuggle into him again. ‘Yes.’ She could not lie. ‘Of course I remember. You’ve been in my dreams since you left. I just didn’t know why.’
‘So, you’ve been dreaming about me?’ The cocky smile was back.
Caitlin felt herself blush. There was no way she was going to tell him about those dreams. ‘Yes, and no – I’m not going to tell you about them.’
‘Well, that’s just mean,’ he said, as he rubbed his thumb against her chin. ‘So, am I forgiven for eavesdropping?’
The feel of his hand was making her body react in a familiar way. She was finding it hard to keep her head together. ‘You’re forgiven.’
He took his cue, placed his other hand on her face and brought her towards him.
She was desperate to kiss him again, against her better judgement.
The kiss was nothing like the last one. Fireworks exploded, as a series of small lights shot up in different directions just as a huge explosion engulfed the sky. In her head, they developed into smaller yet just as beautiful effects, before a grand finale – everything at once. She lost track of where she was, every sound evaporated. There was no-one else. Just them, as it should be.
The beep of a bicycle horn broke the moment, followed by the holler of a hooded teenager, ‘Get a room.’
Somehow, her arms were now firmly round Steven’s waist. Simultaneously, they leant back and broke into laughter.
The earth just moved. Caitlin was sure of it. ‘Wow.’
‘Wow,’ Steven repeated. ‘Do you see now why I came back?’
‘I guess I do.’
She really did.
***
Steven slipped his hand into Caitlin’s. ‘Come on, let’s carry on.’
He needed to walk, to clear his head. She brought out every e
motion imaginable. He was so vulnerable with Caitlin.
A few dog walkers roamed in the distance. At a turn in the path a small white Yorkshire terrier stood to attention. A low growl escaped, it was a warning. A man in his twenties came up to his dog and scolded it. The dog stood its ground and barked louder in protest. It looked like it was about to attack. The man attached the lead and apologised profusely whilst dragging the dog away, it had gone mental.
‘He knows what you are, doesn’t he?’ Caitlin asked.
‘Animals have instincts that we have chosen to ignore.’
‘Why didn’t they kill me that night?’ she asked.
It caught him off guard. Caitlin was so inquisitive. He couldn’t blame her. He just wasn’t ready for it. He didn’t know how much to tell her. He wanted to open up, to let her in. He just did not want her to run away.
He rubbed his finger against his lips. ‘To make sure I did what they said.’
‘So, you saved my life already,’ she laughed. ‘You know, you don’t owe me anything. If you want to leave with a clear conscience you can. I appreciate the truth. It’s nice to know that I’m not crazy. Sometimes I thought I was hallucinating when things popped up in my mind that did not make sense. I promise not to tell anyone about you. You don’t have to risk everything to be with me. I don’t think I’m worth it.’
She was doing it again. She was pushing him away. He had never understood that. Caitlin never thought she was good enough for him. She used to tell him enough times. The tables had turned. He was not good enough for her by miles. He gripped her hand tighter. ‘I didn’t come back because I owed you. I’m still in love with you. I always have been. The number of times you used to ask me why I loved you. You never understood. I have no idea why you don’t see yourself the way I see you. Surely, you realise I am not good enough for you?’
Caitlin fell silent. ‘I never thought I was good enough because it’s true. Why would you love me? I’m a plain Jane, compared to you. I mean, you’re obviously…oh, you know. I’m a redhead, you’re like a Greek God…why me?’ Her voice was distant, pained.
The Evolution Trilogy: Hybrid, Complications & Return Page 52