Homestead

by Radclyffe

  While Clay was off guard, Tess lifted her hips and managed to roll her over. She laughed at the look of consternation on Clay’s face when she landed on top of her, pinning her down. “You don’t think we’re going to do everything on your timetable, do you?”

  “To tell you the truth,” Clay raised her head, brushed her cheek over Tess’s breast, and kissed her nipple, “I can’t think of much of anything at all. Except I can’t get my fill of you.”

  “You’ll have plenty of time to try before the sun comes up.” For an instant, a curtain fell in Clay’s eyes, preventing Tess from seeing beneath the solid brown surface. The barrier was a shock after what they’d just done—what she’d just experienced—and she wanted that shield gone. She kissed Clay hard, delving into her mouth, calling her back, demanding she be with her. With her in the moment. When Clay’s arms came around her, firm and possessing, she gentled the kiss, teased a little along the edge of Clay’s lower lip until Clay groaned. “Any complaints?”

  “None,” Clay murmured, cupping Tess’s breast. She brushed her thumb back and forth over Tess’s nipple, making it pucker and pulse. She smiled a satisfied smile when Tess caught her breath. “None at all.”

  “So for the time being…” Tess kissed Clay on the mouth, on the edge of her jaw, on the slope of her neck. Clay tasted of forest, rich and pungent. A drop of sweat beaded in the hollow between her collarbones, and Tess caught it on the tip of her tongue. Tangy and sweet, uniquely Clay. “This is where you lie still.”

  Clay grimaced, her eyes flashing. “I already did that.”

  “No,” Tess murmured, circling Clay’s nipple with her tongue, “you were standing still then. This is the next stage.”

  Clay tangled her fingers in Tess’s hair. “How many stages are there?”

  Tess grinned, resting her chin on Clay’s chest. The pressure of Clay’s thigh between her legs was making it hard for her to concentrate on words. All she wanted was taste and touch and smell and the sound of Clay out of control for her. “Not sure yet. I’m making it up as I go along.”

  Clay laughed, a deep resonant sound that vibrated into Tess’s chest. She loved the sound, wanted to hear it again and again. “Laughing at a woman in bed could be dangerous.”

  “Oh no, baby. You’re doing great as far as I’m concerned,” Clay said.

  “And that’s all that matters.” Realizing how much she meant that, Tess pushed away thoughts of what would happen in the morning. For tonight, there was no tomorrow.

  Inching down, kissing Clay’s breasts and abdomen, she settled between Clay’s spread thighs. She tugged on the skin around Clay’s belly button until Clay hissed and her thighs tightened against the outside of Tess’s hips. Clay was wet and hot against her belly, and Tess forgot what she had intended to do. Slow, that was it, she was going to go slow and tease her, but God, she wanted her now. She wanted to taste her, to swallow her, to fill herself with everything that was Clay.

  “Damn it,” Tess gasped, “I can’t wait.”

  “Good,” Clay said, her voice raspy. She pushed herself up on her elbows and looked down at Tess. “Neither can I.”

  “Just one more minute. You look so gorgeous right now.” Tess stroked Clay’s breasts, her belly, and the base of her clitoris until Clay’s thighs trembled and her eyes glazed. The glory of Clay in need threatened to stop her heart. Cradling Clay’s hips in her hands, Tess took her into her mouth. She was slick and sweet and hot and hard and everything she desired. Everything.

  Clay watched Tess take her, forcing her arms to support her as her muscles melted and her control shattered. Devastated by pleasure, she fought to memorize everything about the moment—the silvery glow of Tess’s face in the moonlight, the fall of her tangled blond hair over one shoulder, the way she murmured softly in her throat as she took Clay deeper into her mouth. If morning was the end of this miracle, she needed every minute to last a lifetime.

  “I love watching you make me come,” Clay whispered and Tess jerked, moaning softly. Tess’s eyes were nearly closed, her expression possessive and fierce. “I like when you own me.”

  Tess looked up, her lips brushing Clay’s clitoris. “I like owning you.”

  “I’d like it even better if you came while you were making me come.”

  Tess kissed her clit and Clay jerked. Tess grinned. “Is that what you want? Me to come with you in my mouth?”

  “Yes. Yes.” Clay shuddered, sensing the last of her control snap, one strand at a time. “Fuck yes.”

  “Like this, then?” Tess’s pupils flickered, her lids lowered, and she slid one hand down the bed under her belly and between her legs. She caught her breath as her hips involuntarily lifted.

  “Oh yeah,” Clay said, scarcely breathing. “That’s exactly what I want.”

  “This will drive me crazy,” Tess said.

  “Then I won’t be alone.” Clay cupped the back of Tess’s head and pressed up against her mouth. “Take me deep. I’m ready for you.”

  Heat flooding through her, Tess cupped herself and closed her lips around Clay again. Easing her fingers on either side of her clitoris, she stroked lightly. Pressure built deep inside as Clay rocked faster and faster against her mouth. She was no stranger to making herself come, but never like this, never having Clay inside her mouth and about to explode. The sensation of Clay on the verge of coming pushed her to the edge faster than she meant to come. She pulled away, cried out, “Oh God, I’m going to come.”

  Clay gripped her head in both hands and pushed up against her mouth. “So am I. Don’t stop. I want to be in your mouth when you do.”

  Tess closed her lips around Clay’s clitoris as pleasure broke over her. She came in waves as Clay pulsed inside her, giving her exactly what she wanted. Everything.

  *

  Clay lay awake watching the sun come up with Tess curled against her front. Tess’s ass was cradled in the curve of her pelvis and her back against Clay’s breasts. Clay lightly stroked her belly and thighs, not wanting to wake her, but needing to touch. She hadn’t slept much, too hungry for Tess to do more than doze between orgasms. Each time awareness returned, the need came with it, a wild mindless thing clawing inside her, demanding Tess’s taste and scent and heat. Clay took her, again and again, with her hands and mouth and heart, devouring, consuming, reveling in the possession of her. She’d finally taken pity on Tess and let her sleep even though the need still pounded through her.

  Carefully, Clay feathered her fingers over the soft delta between Tess’s thighs. Tess’s breathing changed and Clay knew she was awake. She kissed the tip of her shoulder. “Morning.”

  “Good morning,” Tess said quietly. She’d been awake a few minutes, absorbing the sensation of being in Clay’s arms, of the way Clay touched her—reverently, as if she were precious, and with an unapologetic sense of ownership that made her want to be filled. She reached down, caught Clay’s hand, and entwined their fingers. She drew Clay’s hand up to her breast and her nipple hardened against Clay’s palm. Clay squeezed her, her clit tingled, and somehow, unbelievably, she was ready again. “What time is it?”

  “A little after five.”

  Tess sighed. “I can’t believe I slept so late. I need to go help with the milking.”

  “If I help, can you stay here a little longer?”

  “Clay—you don’t know anything about cows.”

  “I learn fast.” Clay sucked the juncture of Tess’s neck and shoulder, and Tess shivered.

  “You don’t have to.” Tess had a little trouble catching her breath. Clay did things to her she couldn’t control and didn’t really want to. All the more reason to get up and get some sense back into her addled brain.

  “The air smells like rain,” Clay said.

  Tess shook her head. “Not in the forecast.”

  “Forecasts are wrong sometimes. Unpredictable.”

  “I know.”

  Clay nuzzled Tess’s neck, kissed the spot just below her ear that made Tess moan. “H
ow you doing?”

  “I don’t know.”

  Clay tensed, waiting for the recriminations and the regret. “Tess—”

  “I’m pretty sure I’m going to be sore in unusual places for a day or two, and”—Tess rolled onto her back and kissed Clay’s throat—“I’m also pretty sure I want you to fuck me again.”

  “Yeah?”

  “Yeah.”

  Clay almost sighed out loud. Tess was still here, with her. The hand that had been fisted around her heart, slowly crushing the life from it as the hours of the night had bled away, let go and she could breathe again. She still had time. She kissed Tess lightly and caressed Tess’s belly and cupped between her legs. Tess was wet, open for her, and she gently eased inside.

  Tess sucked in a breath, her lids fluttering.

  Clay kissed her. “Good?”

  “Amazing.” Tess covered Clay’s hand and held her motionless inside her. “Just stay right there for a minute. If you move, I’m going to come too soon.”

  “It’s never too soon. But I’d stay here like this forever if you wanted.”

  Tess’s eyes glazed, and she caught her lower lip between her teeth. “I love feeling you make me come.”

  Clay kissed her breast, brushed her mouth over Tess’s nipple, and returned to watching her face. “I love making you come.”

  “If you fuck me just a little right now, I will.”

  “Anything you want.” Clay gathered her close, one arm around her shoulders, and held her tight against her chest. Tess slid her leg over Clay’s hip, opening herself, giving Clay room to move. Clay stroked long and slow and deep, her thumb just brushing Tess’s clitoris each time she entered. Tess’s hips set the pace, and she followed. When Tess pushed harder against her hand, she picked up speed. When Tess’s teeth grazed her shoulder, she kissed her, drinking in Tess’s cries of pleasure as Tess’s orgasm flooded around her fingers. When Tess sagged in her arms, she buried her face in the curve of Tess’s neck. “God, Tess, you’re so beautiful. I lo—”

  “Clay, don’t,” Tess murmured. “Just—don’t.”

  Silently, Clay nodded. She understood. Tess wanted her in bed, at least right this moment, but that’s all she wanted. She didn’t trust her for more. And Clay didn’t blame her. Tess didn’t have any reason to trust her, and the knowledge was a knife in her heart.

  A cracking boom split the air and Tess pulled away, half sitting. “Oh my God. I think that was thunder.”

  The sky outside the open window turned black as night. Tess jumped from the bed and raced to look out. “You should see the sky. Lightning everywhere.”

  “Something big coming,” Clay said, knowing the storms of change had arrived.

  Chapter Twenty-five

  “I’m going to take a quick shower,” Tess said, turning from the window.

  Clay sat on the side of the bed, waiting to be dismissed. Tess had warned her the night would end at sunrise, but she wasn’t volunteering to leave just yet. Visions of Tess in the shower made it difficult for her to think of what her next step should be, anyhow. The only thing she knew for certain was she didn’t want to say good-bye, and she feared once she walked out Tess’s door, good-bye might be very final.

  As if suddenly realizing she was naked, Tess hurriedly gathered up the clothes scattered around on the floor and dumped them on an old-style navy-blue demi-sofa pushed up to the foot of the big mahogany bedstead. Without looking at Clay, Tess sorted through the jumble of their entangled shirts, pants, and underwear. Such a telling activity, with those shed coverings the undeniable testament to their previous intimacy, although Tess looked as if she wanted to avoid thinking of what they meant. Her expression was remote, turned inward, undecipherable.

  Clay waited, heart pounding.

  “I’d offer to share the water, but to be honest,” Tess said as she straightened and finally looked at Clay again, “I don’t trust myself in there with you, and I have things to do. If there’s a storm coming, I need to check the heifer barn and bring in extra feed for the cows. I have to go.”

  “That doesn’t sound too bad to me. The shower part, I mean.” Clay grinned, she couldn’t help it. The frown forming between Tess’s eyes suggested laughter wasn’t a great idea at the moment.

  “No, I don’t imagine it does.” Tess pulled on the shirt she’d been wearing the night before. “And part of me thinks it’s a great idea too. But in case you haven’t noticed, we’re really not teenagers anymore, and I’ve got a business to run. I haven’t been doing a great job of that lately.” She shook her head and sighed. “Maybe I haven’t been doing a good job of it ever.”

  Clay grabbed her pants from the pile, pulled them on, and stood. “That’s not true, and you know it. This is a great-looking farm and I may not know much about cows, but from the looks of things around here, you’re doing everything right.”

  “Yes, so right that I didn’t even know Ray had signed over drilling rights to your company.” Tess scrubbed her face. “God, I must look like an idiot. I am an idiot.”

  “Bullshit. You can’t be responsible for what you didn’t know.”

  Tess, wearing only her shirt, jammed her hands on her hips and gave Clay a hard stare. “Okay, maybe you’re right about that. But it seems that the things I don’t know keep popping up in my life and redirecting it, and I’m tired of not being the one driving the bus.”

  Of all the directions the morning after might have taken, this was the one Clay had hoped to avoid. For a little while longer, at least. She stepped toward Tess and stopped at the cool look Tess gave her. “Do we have to do this now? Last night was—”

  “Last night was last night. But great sex doesn’t make the problems go away, and NorthAm is a problem.”

  “I’m not NorthAm,” Clay said quietly. She picked up the T-shirt she’d worn under her work shirt and pulled it on.

  “No, you’re not. But you walked back into my life and suddenly I discover I may not have any choice but to let you tear up my land.” Tess yanked on her jeans and crossed to the window again, keeping distance between them. Her gaze moved past Clay to the bed and she sighed. “I never seem to have any choice where you’re concerned.”

  “You did last night.”

  Tess closed her eyes. “Yes, I did. Thank you.”

  “Damn it, Tess. I don’t want your thanks.” Clay jerked down her fly and stuffed her T-shirt into her pants. She’d been avoiding this conversation practically half her life, and maybe the time had come to stop. Tess couldn’t seem to look at her without seeing the past, and maybe the only way to put the past to rest was to dig it up first. “I know I didn’t leave you any choice that summer. I don’t have an excuse, but I do have a reason. I thought I was doing the right thing.”

  “You understand I have no idea what you’re talking about.” Tess leaned a shoulder against the window frame and folded her arms across her chest. “How can I, since I still have no idea what happened back then.”

  “It’s compli—”

  “I don’t want to hear it’s complicated. I know just how complicated it was.” Tess pushed a hand through her hair. “How hard would it have been, Clay, to just call me and tell me you had to leave? Even if you didn’t want to tell me why—just to say good-bye?”

  “I was afraid if I did I wouldn’t be able to go,” Clay said, her voice so low Tess could barely hear her.

  “I don’t understand.”

  Clay sat back down on the bed and gripped the mattress on either side of her hips to keep from pounding it with her fists. She forced herself to meet Tess’s confused, angry, and hurt gaze. “My father made me leave. He didn’t give me any choice.”

  “Mine did the same thing, but I tried to call you. Over and over.” Tess fell silent, clearly expecting more.

  “My father was wrong. I was wrong. But it happened a long time ago, and—”

  “And you’ve forgotten it?”

  “No,” Clay snapped. “Never. Jesus, Tess, I wasn’t lying when I told you I
loved you.”

  Tess’s expression subtly shifted, anger and confusion giving way to sadness like the march of shadows across a still pond. The hurt still lingered as she said, “You know, I don’t hold you to that. How could I? Sometimes we say things we mean in the moment, and then life changes and we change and—”

  “No, God damn it, that’s not what happened.” Clay shot to her feet. “My feelings for you didn’t change. They never changed.”

  Tess had never seen Clay this upset. She’d expected irritation, defensiveness, maybe even dismissiveness, but not this. Clay was hurting. That, more than even the night before, when she’d doubted she could feel any more for Clay—or anyone—than she did right then, pushed Tess to crack the shell she’d built around herself. She gripped Clay’s shoulders and caressed the tight muscles beneath her fingers. “All right, slow down.”

  “I can’t stand you thinking I didn’t care.”

  Tess forced herself to remember the way Clay had touched her. She stroked down the outside of Clay’s arms, found her hands, and entwined their fingers. “I know you did. Now slow down and just tell me what happened.”

  “I want to, I’ve always wanted to. But it’s not just about me, Tess.” Clay’s dark eyes swam with frustration and unhappiness.

  Tess wanted to kiss the misery away, but that wasn’t what they needed. One kiss and they’d be back in bed. The sex between them was too good, too incendiary. Too cleansing in the moment. But when the passion ebbed, the shadows of all that had been and still might be would remain, and sooner or later, they’d reach this impasse again. She squeezed Clay’s fingers, smiled faintly. “I don’t understand. You said your father made you leave. Some family matter—some secret?”

  Clay looked away. She couldn’t figure out how to get through this without hurting Tess, and she refused to lie. She had lied by omission all these years, and she wouldn’t keep doing it. “My father wanted me to break up with you. He had his reasons, and I went along with them.”

  “Your father? But how did he even know?”