by M. E. Carter
I didn’t go to court the day Jaxon testified. I wouldn’t let my dad go either. But Jaxon’s dad did. He refused to let Jax be in that room without being there for moral support. And even though he’s biased, he says Jaxon’s emotions helped the jury see beyond the DNA and clinical side of things. If I know him, his love for me and disgust for what happened, for what he saw, helped the jury members see the victim’s side of things.
They got to see his shock, at finding me half naked behind a dumpster.
They got to see his anger when he realized I was unconscious and that Ron guy ran.
They got to see his confusion when he had to decide between keeping the perp pinned to the ground or saving my life.
And then the DA took it one step further and the jury got to see Jaxon talk about how many nights he held me while I had nightmares and how many times he held me while I cried.
Of course, the defense attorney tried to rip that story to shreds. Since Jaxon didn’t know me before the attack, he had no idea if I was an emotional basket case before. He may have discredited Jaxon a little bit, but not enough to make a difference.
The trial wasn’t long, but it was still nerve-wracking. Finally, after what seemed like forever, he was found guilty of two counts of aggravated sexual assault of an unconscious person. My dad cried when the guilty verdict was read, but I didn’t. I refused to shed one more tear over it. Especially not when I was in a courtroom with the guy who had tried to destroy me. I wouldn’t give him the satisfaction. I would, however, give him a piece of my mind.
Both of the victims were given an opportunity to speak at the sentencing. The other girl didn’t want to. She’s local and knew she would be recognized. I get it. This is a very personal crime. It’s not something you want following you for the rest of your life.
But I wanted to. I put in a lot of thought about what I wanted to say. Nothing I say will sway the judge. His mind is already made up. But what I say will influence me. It will influence other people. It might influence that Ron guy. Doubtful, but you never know.
So now we sit and wait on these hard benches in the courtroom, waiting for my chance to speak.
“You okay, babe?” Jaxon whispers in my ear, squeezing the back of my neck. I lean into him, inhaling his scent. It calms me.
“Just ready to do this and move on.”
“Did I ever tell you how proud I am of you?”
I giggle. “Only every day since this stupid trial started.”
He kisses me on the top of the head. “Well, I am. So proud of you.”
“I know.”
Before we can say anything else, the bailiff yells, “All rise,” before the judge enters the courtroom.
We all stand and wait while the judge gets settled and tells us to sit. Finally, he seems ready to go.
“We’re at the sentencing hearing of Jonathan Ronald Campone. Mr. Campone, you realize you’ve been convicted on two counts of aggravated sexual assault of an unconscious person.”
“Yes sir. I understand.” I refuse to look at him when he speaks, instead staring straight at the judge.
“You also understand this is your sentencing hearing, and once I give my judgment, it is final, and you will immediately return to your cell while you await further instructions.”
“Yes, your Honor.”
“And you realize if you don’t agree, you have the right to appeal.”
I squeeze Jaxon’s knee, knowing he’s rolling his eyes. From a judicial stand point, we understand the appeals process and why it’s necessary. But knowing beyond a shadow of a doubt we’ve got the right guy, it feels more like rubbing salt into a wound.
“Yes, your Honor.”
“Okay then.” The judge shuffles a few more papers around. “Before we get to the sentencing, one of our victims has requested to read a statement. Mr. Campone, I highly suggest you listen closely to what she has to say.”
“Yes, your Honor.”
He sounds monotone, like he doesn’t care. Frankly, I don’t think he ever did. He’s been on house arrest for the six months. His bond was set at three hundred thousand dollars and lucky us, his parents were able to come up with the thirty thousand to post his bond. It was tough knowing he was out, but a comfort knowing if he left his home, they’d snatch him up, and it would be all over.
“Victim number two. I’ll have you speak first. If you’ll please come stand next to the district attorney. You’re welcome to begin.”
I take a deep breath as Jaxon squeezes my hand in support, my dad patting me on the back. Making my way up to the front, climbing over Jaxon and his dad, who is way bigger in person than I originally anticipated, I know all eyes are on me. But it’s not all those eyes I’m nervous about. It’s just one pair. The pair of the man I love, who has gotten me through so much in the last year.
I stand next to the district attorney, who quietly says, “Are you ready?”
I nod.
“Victim number two, the floor is yours,” the judge says kindly.
I take another deep breath and look at my paper and begin reading the notes I had carefully put together.
“You all know me as victim number two. A nineteen-year-old woman who was drugged at a bar, taken out to a back alley behind a dumpster, and violently raped. But let me tell you who I really am. My name is Annika Leander. I’m a sophomore at Southeast Texas University. I turned twenty a few months ago. I am not victim number three. I’m a survivor of an infinite number, because there are hundreds of thousands of women out there like me. They may not have been a part of this trial, but they have a stake in the outcome.
“You see, Mr. Campone, you’re not special. You’re not original. You didn’t do anything that thousands of other men haven’t done before you.
“I remember you talking to me at that club. I remember you pretending to be kind when I needed help. That’s all I remember of you. That’s all I’ll ever remember of you.
“That night, when you chose to take my body, you thought you were taking much more. Because rape is not about sex; it’s about control. The entire time you were hurting me, I’m sure you felt powerful. Justified.
“But the thing is, you may have taken my body, but that’s all you took. You didn’t take my dignity. You didn’t take my pride. You didn’t take my intellect or my drive or my motivation. Hell, you didn’t even take away the ability for me to have a satisfying sex life with my boyfriend.”
I hear Jaxon groan in the background.
“And you didn’t take away the ability for me to laugh at the fact that I just embarrassed my boyfriend in the middle of a courtroom while he sits next to his dad. And mine. Because the night you decided to rape me violently behind a dumpster is the night your life ended. But it’s the night mine really began. I am much stronger than I was before then. I am much more resilient. And from what will easily be known as the worst time of my life, I ended up finding the love of my life.
“Now, while you are about to rot in prison, while you are going to have to look over your shoulder for the next however many years, while you are stuck in limbo, not able to move forward, but not able to go back, while you’re stuck waiting for your life to continue, mine has already moved on.
“By the time you get out of prison, I’ll have a degree. I’ll have a career. I’ll probably be married. I might have some children. I’ll have a house. I’ll be on my third new car. Because my options are endless. Where will you be? Nowhere. Your life will still be stuck.
“You’ll still be looking over your shoulder. And for the rest of your life, whenever you can’t do something, like get a passport so you can go on a cruise, you’ll be reminded of why. You’ll be reminded your life is on hold because you took from Annika Leander.”
“And for the remainder of my life, you’ll never even cross my mind. Because I don’t have to look over my shoulder anymore. I don’t have to sleep with one eye open. You took my body, but I took it back. And my future is looking bright. The only life you obliterated was your
own.
“So remember as you rot in prison, remember every time you’re stuck in the middle of a gang war in the cafeteria, remember every time you’re sleeping with one eye open, you did this. And every time you wonder what I’m doing, rest assured, I’m not at all thinking about you.
“I would like to thank the jury. Thank you for recognizing the truth of this situation. Thank you for taking a stand to say ’enough.’ Thank you, Your Honor, for allowing me the chance to stand here and show every woman out there they’re stronger than the coward who attacked them.”
With that, I lay my paper on the district attorney’s table, I turn around, and I walk out the door to my future, not looking back.
Chapter Twenty-Nine
Jaxon
“Fuuuuuuuuck,” I groan my release, continuing to move my hips as much as I can while Annika rides out her orgasm. Her head is thrown back, her eyes rolled to the back of her head, and she’s moaning as loud as I’ve ever heard her. It’s a beautiful sight.
Finally, she stills and collapse on top of my chest, panting.
“Holy shit that was good,” she blurts out making me laugh.
I keep rubbing my fingertips up and down her naked back in our post-coital bliss.
Being in an apartment together for the summer has been awesome. I really don’t want to move back into the dorms. An apartment means as much sex as we want, when we want, wherever we want, without fear of anyone walking in on us. I’m going to really miss that when the semester starts up again.
But try as I might, Annika was adamant that we have not been dating long enough to share residency permanently. The only reason we did it temporarily was because of the trial.
With all the delays and hearing dates changing, we were never quite sure when the trial would begin. We knew it was going to be hard on both of us, and not knowing what would happen with the media, we decided it was best to prepare for the worse. We each reduced our course load, only taking one class a semester, and moved out of the dorms. If we had to drop our one class, we’d have to move off-campus anyway so it was better to be safe than homeless. Plus, the lack of privacy to process everything happening in the trial was a major concern for Annika’s well-being. When my dad offered to rent us each an apartment, we refused. If we were doing this, we were doing it together.
Annika’s dad wasn’t thrilled about it, but when he realized the alternative was her living on her own, he changed his mind. As much as he likes me, he still gave me a stern warning of “Just don’t make her a Cowboys fan.”
That man cracks me up.
But now that the piece of shit is away for a long, long time, possibly less if he has good behavior, our life is going back to normal. And by normal, I mean me living with Germaine in a small dorm room; Annika living with Lauren in a bigger dorm room; and us having to get creative with intimacy.
I guess it could be worse.
“Are you looking forward to moving back in with Lauren next week?” I ask, still holding my girlfriend tightly to me.
She hums her agreement, still spent from our lovemaking. Well done, Jaxon. I give myself a mental high five.
“Yeah,” she finally says but doesn’t sound convincing. “I miss her. I’m looking forward to having more girl time with her, but I’ve enjoyed playing house with you this summer. I don’t like why we played house, but it was fun.”
“And by fun, do you mean because of all the sexy times?”
She giggles into my chest. “Ohmygod, you’re such a dork. No, I mean I enjoy being with you. Even when you have your clothes on. I know. It’s hard to believe there’s more to you than just your body.”
I pinch her butt, making her squeal. “Are you sure you don’t want to stay in the apartment?”
She rolls her eyes and moves off me, both of us groaning when I pull out of her. After the first time we were together, she immediately went to the clinic for birth control. We could have gone with condoms, but bareback was way too good. And once her follow-up checks-ups all came back clean, there was no reason to not enjoy ourselves.
Even though I was honest with Annika, and told her of the possible sterility I faced from chemo as a kid, we agreed it wasn’t worth the risk. Not at our age. We have goals and dreams. Sure, we’re going to be together forever (even if she hasn’t figured it out yet), but we want to do it the right way. We both have too much to accomplish first.
Still, I keep trying to convince her to live with me. Despite the facts that our lease is up and my dad refuses to pay anymore rent, but I still like the fantasy.
“No, Jaxon,” she says. “I love that you love living with me, and I had the best summer. But I’m not that girl.”
“What girl? The girl who loves her boyfriend and wants to spend every waking minute with him?”
She punches me playfully in the shoulder. “No. The girl who is clingy with her boyfriend and has no life outside of him.”
I scoff. “I kind of like that girl.”
She rolls her eyes again. “You’re full of shit.” Then her eyes light up. “Oh! I forgot to tell you. I have news.” She sits up excitedly, the sheet dropping off her chest, her gorgeous tits bouncing right in my face.
I can’t help it when I lean over and take one of her nipples in my mouth and gently bite. She squeaks and then groans.
“That feels so good. Don’t start something you can’t finish.”
“Who says I can’t finish?”
She groans again as I move to the other side, giving the other breast the attention it deserves. “It’s been like two minutes. You can’t convince me you’re hard and ready to go again.”
I grab her hand and put it between my legs.
“Oh!” she says in disbelief. “I guess you can be ready to go again.”
“I don’t know what happened, baby. You seem to have unbroken me.”
She laughs and pushes me away. “No listen, Jaxon. Listen.”
Sitting crisscross while naked on the bed, gets me excited all over again. I make a show of perusing her body, my gaze ending on her sweet, sweet pussy that’s right there in front of me. As I reach my hand over to play with my favorite kitty, she snatches the sheet up and covers herself.
“That’s no fair. I was going to play with that,” I grumble.
“I know. But listen. It’s important. I got an email today.”
Lying back, I tuck my arm under my head and go into serious mode. “Fine. You got an email today. What is so special about this email?”
“Guess who got into the training program?”
My eyes widen and lift up slightly. “Wait, as in going to be a trainer on the field during the season?”
She smiles and nods, her eyes wide with delight. “Yep.”
“Baby, that’s awesome!” I sit straight up and hug her tight. The competition was fierce to get in, so this is amazing news. “When do you start?”
“The registrar has to change my classes to add it in, so next week when we move, I have to go get that fixed,” she chatters excitedly. “The class itself is only one day a week for three hours. But I’ll have to be at three practices a week. And they’ll rotate us, and I’ll be at all the home games. It isn’t until you’re a grad student that they’ll let you go to away games if they need you, but I’m so excited, Jaxon. Even if I only hand you a water bottle every once in a while. I. Can’t. Wait.”
I smile at her rambling because this is the beginning of her dream. It’s hard to be a physical therapist for a professional football team. There are a lot of people who want those jobs. But getting into this program is a step in the right direction.
What she doesn’t know is I have no problem getting a letter of recommendation from the most sought out retired football player when it’s time. Dad loves her. He’d do anything to help her. She hasn’t seen how overbearing he can be yet, so she better be careful, or she’ll end up in the Dallas Cowboy locker room. And wouldn’t her dad love that?
“See,” she finally says as she continues to ramble, �
�it’s all coming together.”
“I’m really proud of you, Annika.” And I’m serious. “You’re going to look really hot in those khaki shorts they’re gonna make you wear.”
She punches me in the arm again and I grab her, pulling her on top of me while I laugh. When I push the hair out of her face and our eyes meet, the air crackles around us. Kissing her lightly, I wait for her to open before tangling her tongue with mine. Once we’re breathless again, I can’t help but tell her everything I’m feeling.
“I love you so much it hurts sometimes.”
She smiles. “I love you so much too.”
She doesn’t know it yet, but she’s it for me. It won’t happen soon. We’re not ready. But someday, certainly before medical school, I’m going to put a ring on her finger.
And then I’m going to hope she’ll be ready to live in an apartment with me.
Chapter Thirty
Annika
“Do you ever regret how we met?”
I stop my chewing and look up at him. “Why would I regret how we met?” I ask between bites of queso.
We’re at Buck’s for the first NFL game of the regular season. Germaine is on his way but was sidetracked by some girl he’s been wooing in his math class. I have no idea who she is or what’s so special about her that he had to miss kick off, but hey. Who am I to shit on true love?
Lauren is also coming as soon as she gets out of practice, but I’m not holding my breath. Ever since a new guy joined their team, she seems to be more flaky than normal. At this point, he hasn’t caught the hint yet, but I have never seen her giggly before. I’ve seen her flaunt, I’ve seen her be sassy, I’ve seen her be confident in her sexuality. But I’ve never seen her be a puddle of goo before. It’s fun seeing her crush on this guy.