Take It Off the Menu: A sizzling, accidentally married rom com! (Mile High Matched, Book 3) (A Mile High Matched Novel)

by Christina Hovland

  He didn’t even care that there was a room full of friends watching their exchange.

  “He calls her Mar,” Heather not-so-quietly whispered.

  Now? Now he cared.

  Shit.

  With the moment broken, he stepped back. Lifted his Coors to his lips like a Rocky Mountain armor.

  “This is the best.” Claire leaned forward, chin in palms, her elbows on the counter.

  Jase recovered from his choking episode. “You two keep doing what you’re doing. Epic shit going down right here.”

  Eli couldn’t get his tongue to move. There was so much he wanted to say. To Marlee. To his friends. But like always, his tongue seemed to be adhered to the top of his mouth with high-grade peanut butter.

  “Don’t get too excited,” Marlee said with a solid look toward Eli that made his knees turn to plum-flavored jam. “We’re in the middle of the divorce.”

  He grunted in reply. What else was he supposed to say?

  “It’s all very amicable,” Marlee assured. “He’s even letting Lothario and me stay with him while things get finalized.”

  Now it was Brek’s turn to choke on a chip. “She lives with you?”

  Of course, she did. He wasn’t an asshole. “Yep.”

  “Who’s Lothario?” Claire asked.

  Marlee lifted him from her purse. “This is Lothario.”

  She held up the little guy.

  “Sweet fuck,” Brek said.

  Velma glared at him.

  “I think cussing is allowed in this situation,” Brek said, defending his word choice.

  Dean moved to pour himself a few fingers of whiskey from Brek’s stash. He paused near Eli.

  “You got new ink,” Dean said. He pointed to the heart on Eli’s arm.

  “We both did.” Marlee turned her ankle to display her matching heart. “We were drunk.” She pulled a you-know-how-it-goes face.

  Dean played by all the rules, though. He’d never get inked and married in Vegas.

  “You know what I think?” Velma asked. “I think that you guys should go start the grill and we’ll stay here and get to know Marlee.”

  “And Lothario,” Heather added.

  “We’re grilling?” Eli asked. And suddenly, the world looked better. Shinier. Give him a cut of meat and a cooking surface and he could make magic. Magic that didn’t involve any conversation about marriage. He knew the word. Knew what he’d done. He was dealing with it all on an hourly basis.

  Brek grabbed a stunning tray of beef tenderloin roast from the fridge. All laid out and ready for Eli to escape into cooking. He looked at Marlee.

  He wouldn’t leave her if she wasn’t good, wasn’t okay with being left alone with the wives and fiancée of his best friends.

  “Go do your thing,” she said. A blessing that would get him out of the awkwardness and into his element.

  “That’s mine.” Eli took the tray from Brek, heading toward the grill on the balcony.

  He had a load of explaining to do to his friends. And a cut of meat to cook.

  Thank God for meat and friends.

  Marlee could tell these ladies were the real deal. Like Becca, Kellie, and Sadie…they were authentic. Looking back, her so-called Denver friends hadn’t been warm in the beginning. Not until they learned what she had to offer. Namely, money.

  Heather had a fun vibe to her that Marlee knew could get them both in trouble—the kind of trouble they’d have a heck of a lot of fun doing. Heather’s long brown hair was pulled tight into a ponytail. She was a jeans and T-shirt kind of girl with wicked cute pink ballet flats.

  Claire had dark hair and a body that Marlee would kill for. Not that she’d actually work out to get a body like that—way too much effort would be involved in that project. But she could appreciate it on someone else. Claire was not a jeans and T-shirt girl. She was the cute dress and strappy sandal girl. And probably sweater dress girl when it got chilly.

  And Velma? Velma had blonde hair and a warmth that Marlee hoped would stay genuine. Velma was super pretty. She had curves and she rocked them. Her dress wasn’t as casual as Claire’s, but it wasn’t a full business suit either.

  She’d slipped off to the bathroom after Eli headed for the grill. She wanted to check her lipstick, and she wanted to check in with the girls.

  Marlee: I’m making new friends. Eli’s friends.

  Sadie: …

  Becca: How goes the de-Eli-ing?

  Marlee: Good. He’s grilling a roast. Happy.

  Sadie: I can’t believe he took u tonight! That’s amazing.

  Marlee: Divorce papers, new friends & a breakthrough. Yay me!

  Kellie: I hope you enjoy Eli’s meat! :p

  Becca: Leave it to Kel to go there.

  Sadie: Can we not? He’s my b-r-o-t-h-e-r. Insert vomit emoji.

  Becca: Sadie is voice-texting again.

  Sadie: Damn it. It’s supposed to actually put the emoji.

  Marlee: GTG

  She tucked the phone away and headed back to the kitchen, settling on a barstool next to Claire and Lothario.

  “You married Eli?” Heather asked. “And he just went along with it?”

  “That doesn’t sound like something Eli would just go along with.” Claire reached to pet Lothario. He immediately nuzzled her hand. Marlee kept her eye on him in case he got any dirty ideas.

  “We screwed up. That’s all,” Marlee said.

  “I have literally never known Eli to screw up.” Velma multitasked, somehow managing to fix a salad and potatoes and prep dessert all at once. “Frankly, I think a good screwup is just what he needs.” She paled. “I didn’t mean that like you’re a screwup. I mean—”

  “She didn’t mean how that sounded.” Claire giggled. “She means Eli needs his life shaken up.”

  Marlee chuckled. She liked these ladies. They were kind, and they probably didn’t expect her to pay for everything. “I totally agree. I hadn’t had a chance to hang out with him for a while.”

  What with all the wedding planning and the like. And the fact she only really got to see him when Sadie came to town.

  “Can I help with that?” Marlee asked as Velma worked.

  Not that she’d be much help in the kitchen, but she could certainly do something to help out.

  “Nope.” Velma flashed her a smile. “I’ve got it.”

  “You two met in Vegas then?” Claire asked. Lothario had made himself at home in her lap.

  “Oh no. I’ve known Eli since we were teenagers. His sister is my best friend.” Better just explain it all at once so they understood that what happened didn’t mean anything permanent. “I was supposed to get married, but my fiancé decided not to go through with it at the last minute. My friends decided to get me out of town for the weekend. Eli came along with us on the wedding-didn’t-happen Vegas trip. And then this happened.” She flicked her hair over her shoulder. Eli hadn’t appreciated the amount of time it had taken her to blow it out. But the results were worth it. “It wasn’t planned. Hence the divorce.”

  “And now you’re living with him?” Velma confirmed.

  Marlee wiped a line of condensation from the side of her glass. “Things kind of went south for me when we got back.”

  Velma stilled mid-salad-toss. “The Medford account.”

  Marlee paused. Eli had said Velma worked with Dean in finance.

  “You probably work on my parents’ accounts.” Marlee lifted Lothario onto her lap. “It’s okay. It’s not a secret. They cut me off because I made a bad choice and got married. That’s why Eli is letting me stay with him.”

  Velma and Claire shared a look that held a whole lot of conversation without any words.

  “Don’t worry,” Marlee added. “I’m not taking advantage or anything. He said it was okay and I promised to pay him back once this whole thing is over.”

  “That’s not what we were thinking,” Claire said. “We’re all actually really excited that Eli brought someone around.”

  “
He’s never brought anyone before?” Marlee asked. That didn’t seem right. Eli was a great guy. He deserved to be happy. Not that one had to be in a relationship to be happy. Eli just didn’t seem like a guy that should be alone all the time.

  Sure, he acted like he preferred it. She didn’t buy the act. How many times had she noticed him texting his sisters? His mom? His dad? Calling Sadie?

  “I guess our next party will be a wedding shower for you and Eli,” Velma said.

  Velma was just being nice, Marlee was confident in that. But the idea of having anything truly wedding related was a big fat kick in the gut. She’d done all that once and now she had a load of gifts to box up and return.

  “No wedding shower. That’s probably inappropriate with the divorce and all.”

  “You’re not really going to divorce him, are you?” Heather grimaced. “I mean, he’s Eli. You can’t divorce Eli.”

  Well, he was Eli. But… “I kind of have to. Since we’re not actually a couple.”

  “But you could be.” Heather grinned huge. “I think you should be.”

  Marlee let her mind wander to that place where maybe she and Eli could work. He was easy to be with. Excellent in bed. Always there for her. She’d expected her life with Eli to last a few months and then she’d go back to a new version of what she’d done before. But life with Eli could be wonderfully comfortable.

  Blah. No. No way was she ready for that.

  “My fiancé just dumped me after ten years together. There’s got to be some kind of period of mourning or something I need to adhere to before I start dating again. And shouldn’t I have a rebound guy? I don’t want my rebound guy to be my best friend’s brother. That would make things so awkward.”

  Unlike marrying him…

  “Maybe we could help you find a rebound guy so that you can be with Eli?” Claire asked. “We love projects. Especially projects that end with Eli not being so grumpy all the time.”

  Eli wasn’t grumpy. Eli was just misunderstood. Marlee opened her mouth to say just that—

  “There will be no hooking Eli’s wife up with a rebound guy,” Jase said from behind Marlee. “If you need a project, I have a wall that needs paint.”

  Jase wandered into the kitchen, moving behind Heather to nuzzle her neck before he grabbed a couple of beers off the counter.

  “Shoo,” Heather said. “This is girl stuff.”

  “What’s girl stuff?” Brek asked, coming inside and taking one of the beer bottles from Jase.

  “Trying to find Marlee a hookup so she can be with Eli.” Jase gave Heather a clear don’t-you-dare look.

  “Well, that’s the worst idea I’ve heard in a while.” Brek popped the bottle cap off his beer.

  “Which is why we’re going to do it.” Claire shrugged.

  “Don’t you worry you’ll piss off the beast by finding his wife someone else?” Jase asked, standing behind Heather with his arms around her.

  Marlee glanced away, her throat suddenly filled with cotton. She missed that feeling. The feeling of a man behind her. A man who wanted to touch her.

  “Finding her someone else will ensure that the two of them end up together,” Claire said like it was really a thing.

  “Who ends up together?” Eli stomped into the kitchen.

  “You two.” Jase pointed between them with the end of his beer bottle.

  “For fuck’s sake,” Eli said under his breath.

  “They’re coming up with this themselves,” Marlee assured. “We’re in the middle of a very amicable divorce. I don’t want to do anything to compromise that.”

  And the idea of hooking up with anyone made Marlee’s skin start to itch. Well, not Eli. That hookup was actually pretty fun.

  “Well, at least come out with us next week?” Velma asked. “I get another night off from mom duty.”

  Marlee perked up. She missed having lots of plans. She needed plans. “That sounds really fun.”

  “Great.” Claire clapped her hands quietly. “And we’ll only try to set you up with the cute ones.”

  “And only if you want to,” Heather added.

  Well, that was…great.

  Eli caught Marlee’s gaze. She shook her head slightly.

  He sighed and headed back to the patio.

  “Excuse me for a minute.” Marlee followed him to where Dean stood watching the grill.

  “Hi. It’s Dean?” Marlee asked.

  “Yup.” He smiled an easy smile.

  “I’m still learning names.” Marlee moved beside Eli as he checked the roast. “Do you mind giving Eli and me a second?”

  Dean did a quick take between the two of them. “Yup.”

  Clearly sensing Eli’s tension, Dean hurried inside, pulling the door closed behind him.

  Marlee leaned against the railing overlooking Washington Park. “You know I’m not going to see anyone while we’re still married, right?”

  He looked straight ahead, no emotion in his features. She couldn’t help but notice how his jaw clenched and his grip on the railing made his knuckles go white. “You can do what you want to do.”

  She squeezed his arm. “Well, I know that. But you’ve been great to me and I don’t want you to think I’d just go off with someone else.”

  “Mar.” He caught her gaze, pinned it with his. “I don’t have any claim on you.”

  Her heart clenched.

  No, no, he didn’t.

  But yes, yes, he did.

  “Do you want to see anyone else while we wait for the divorce?” she asked, hoping like crazy he didn’t want to date while they were married. But she didn’t have a claim on him, either. The sensitive skin along her arms prickled at the idea of him with someone else. Which made no sense.

  He pressed his palm against his neck, bunching the muscles of his triceps. “No. I guess not.”

  She let out a breath. “So we’ll just not. It doesn’t mean anything. We’re just trying to not be awkward about the situation we’re in.”

  “That’s all it is?” His Adam’s apple bobbed in his throat.

  Was that all this was? She was still supposed to be mourning her relationship with Scotty, not having a conversation like this with Eli.

  The air seemed to snap between them, waiting for her answer.

  “It’s all it should be, right?” she asked. “I should take some time to figure out my life. I mean, you don’t want me to work for you forever. I need to find something permanent. And a place to live.”

  “Ninety days and you get your old life back,” he pointed out.

  “Looks like it.” She shook her head, refusing to go back to a numb reality that included attending dinner parties with “friends” who only cared about her American Express and working at a job where she didn’t even get a paycheck. These months would be about Marlee finding her footing in a life that she designed herself.

  The thing about Eli was that he took a lot of time to think before he spoke. Sometimes, he took a lot of time and then never said anything. It’s who he was. Had been ever since Marlee first met him. He didn’t use words unless they were words that meant something. Important words.

  He cleared his throat. “In all the time I’ve known you, and it’s been a long time, you’ve never been without a guy on your hook. If that’s what you need, I don’t want to stop you.”

  That’s what he thought? She needed a guy? Always needed a man?

  No.

  Had she always been with someone? She went back through the years before Scotty. There had only been small patches where she wasn’t dating someone…all the way back to seventh grade and her first “official” boyfriend. Huh. She’d never realized that before.

  She bounced on her toes, doing her best to be cheery. No one wanted deep thoughts at an engagement party. She certainly didn’t need to be evaluating her entire romantic history here. “Then that’s all the more reason I should take this time and learn to just be me.”

  “You think you can do that?” he asked, clearly not buy
ing it.

  When she was a teenager, Eli always saw right through her bullshit. Apparently, that hadn’t changed.

  “Of course.” She kicked off from the railing. “And you know what?”

  “I bet you’re gonna tell me.” He opened the grill cover, poked at the roast with a pair of tongs.

  “In all that time, you’ve never been with anyone. Maybe it’s you we should be setting up.” She said it, but the idea of Eli with anyone made her heart feel funny. Not good funny. Ache funny. “A little project for my new friends and me?”

  “Don’t even think about it.” He pulled her against his side like she was a kid sister.

  Except being so close to him made her not feel one bit like his sister.

  She laid her head against his shoulder. “I like you, Eli.”

  “I like you, too, Mar.” He tilted his head against the crown of hers, planting a soft kiss there.

  Okay. So they weren’t seeing other people. They were married. And she was not getting a brotherly vibe from him. That didn’t necessarily mean anything.

  “I’m glad we’re getting a divorce so we can spend time together.” She glanced up to catch him staring at her.

  He chuckled. “Me, too.”

  Disentangling herself from his hug, she bounced her way over to watch the traffic by the park. “And I’m glad I’m not trying to cook spaghetti back at your place.”

  That got her a bark of a laugh. “Me, too, Mar. Me, too.”

  This would be the best divorce in the history of all divorces.

  Her cell buzzed. She didn’t dare chance a glance to see who was calling. It kept buzzing. Finally, she yanked it out, not answering and not recognizing the number calling.

  “Maybe you should get that?” Eli asked when the phone continued to buzz at them.

  “Hello,” Marlee said.

  “Marlee?” a voice she vaguely recognized asked in return. “This is Constance. From the Denver Post.”

  Marlee stilled. She knew Constance. Not well, but she’d met her a few times. They’d had lunch once to discuss sponsoring one of the team events. She was nice enough. Super serious about her job, which Marlee could understand and admire. Except when the job was to spill Marlee’s dirty laundry all over the Mile High City.