by Mandy Baggot
‘I know,’ Cole replied, almost breathless.
‘I think I’m lying on a rock,’ Robyn said, shifting slightly under him.
‘I’ve got cramp in my leg.’
‘Why didn’t you say? I can move.’
‘No. Don’t move. Stay right where you are,’ Cole spoke, kissing her mouth again.
‘Ow! My ribs! Mind where you put your elbow.’
‘Sorry.’
Robyn laughed and kissed him. They’d just made love under the stars, in Fall temperatures on a blanket that felt like it had seen better days. Yet she wouldn’t have wanted it any other way.
‘Do you think we’ll always be this happy?’ she asked him as he moved in tight beside her.
‘I’d like to think so.’
‘Do you think when we’re ninety we’ll still be driving down to the lake in Leonora and making out on the sand?’
‘We might not be driving Leonora. She probably doesn’t have that many years left in her,’ Cole said.
‘We should definitely get a monster truck.’
‘What is it with you and monster trucks?’
‘What is it with you and wiping your mouth with your ice hockey shirt?’
‘Tightening the lid of the milk?’
‘Eating pasta for almost every meal?’
‘Dill pickles and ice cream?’
‘That isn’t unusual!’
*
He held her close to him and listened to her breathing. His heart was still racing, his body aching from the intensity of the moment. He’d just made love to his future wife for the first time and he’d never felt anything even halfway close to it before. Meeting Robyn had changed things for him. Work was no longer his priority, she was. His focus had shifted and he was okay. He mattered to her and she mattered to him, and that was more important than anything else.
‘I’ll teach you to shoot,’ Robyn remarked suddenly, breaking his thoughts.
‘What?’
‘I’ll teach you to shoot, so you don’t embarrass yourself at the town turkey shoot in the spring. And can you ride a horse?’
‘I did a bucking bronco ride once. Lasted all of four seconds,’ he remarked.
‘I’ll teach you that, too.’
Forty-Four
It was match night and Robyn felt rough. She’d worked the roadhouse again and Advil was doing nothing to ease her rib pain. That, coupled with the fact that the Panthers were even more depleted, made her want to just go home and watch re-runs of last year’s Stanley Cup and devour a pantry’s worth of chips. But there were Sierra and Sienna dressed up again and Pam and Bob. She fixed a smile on her face and hurried toward them.
‘Hey! Girls, water bottles aren’t ready, go get them,’ she ordered as she came to join the men on the team bench.
‘Made Cole the captain,’ Bob remarked as Robyn sat down.
‘I didn’t have a choice, did I? Brad’s practically bathed himself in coffee so he can play, but he’s been drinking again and I need a captain I can trust. Cole’s the right person for the job. Only Brad has a problem with it,’ she answered.
‘I was just telling everyone I’ve seen this beautiful wedding dress on sale, it’s ivory with…’ Pam started.
‘Pam, it’s hockey. When hockey’s on, we don’t talk about anything but hockey,’ Bob reminded her.
‘I’m sure it’s great,’ Robyn responded kindly.
‘It’s not, it’s gross,’ Sienna informed her.
‘It’s worse than gross,’ Sierra added.
*
‘Guys, we need to get forward a little more, a little quicker,’ Cole said to his team.
‘Are you kidding me? It’s all we can do to stop them netting a goal. We’re just not getting the run of the puck,’ Mickey responded.
‘We’re not playing like we played against Grand Rapids,’ Cole answered.
‘Newsflash for you. Brad wasn’t playing against Grand Rapids and we had Robyn,’ Wade replied.
‘He’s losing out to everyone,’ Mickey said, looking across at Brad who was catching his breath by the sidelines.
‘We’ve got no one to swap him out with,’ Cole reminded them. ‘Art’s still sick and no one can get a hold of Jon. It’s like he’s disappeared off the face of the planet.’
‘There’s always, Robyn, she could play under Art’s name again,’ Wade suggested.
‘Newsflash for you. She has two broken ribs, she can barely walk without it hurting,’ Cole responded.
‘Stuck with it then. What d’you want to do? Go for the win or see if we can hang on for a draw?’ Mickey asked.
‘Go for the win, because if they score, we’re under pressure already,’ Cole replied, replacing his mouth guard.
‘Henrik, man, you’re getting everything,’ Mickey said, slapping him on the back.
‘Come on Panthers, let’s go!’ Wade said, skating over to Brad and encouraging him to become more involved.
*
Play recommenced and the puck went straight to a Cincinnati Cyclones player who turned, neatly passed Brad, and slotted it under the goaltender’s pads.
‘Shit!’ Robyn exclaimed, putting her head in her hands.
‘It was always gonna happen,’ Grant said.
The players’ heads had dropped. Mickey was beating his stick against the ice and Brad was on his ass on the rink. Cole was calling them to regroup but their morale had just hit rock bottom.
‘With Brad the way he is, yes it was always going to happen and we only have half a squad. Maybe I could play under Art’s name again,’ Robyn mused as the referee recommenced play.
‘Absolutely not. You’ve got broken ribs… you go out there, you’re a liability to everyone,’ Bob told her.
‘Jason could play under Jon’s name,’ Grant proposed.
‘You’ve got to be kidding, Grant,’ Bob said, looking at him with wide eyes.
‘He’s here, he’s sitting just over there. He’s a good player. Obviously he’s been a little short on practice but…’
‘I don’t know how you could suggest such a thing. He shouldn’t even be here,’ Pam said, putting her hands to her mouth in shock.
‘Listen, I know what you all think of him, but he’s my son, and what happened to innocent until proven guilty?’ Grant asked them.
‘He was proven guilty, Grant,’ Bob reminded him.
‘And that DNA evidence was tampered with, I’m telling you. He wouldn’t lie to me, not about something like that,’ Grant insisted.
‘Get him kitted up,’ Robyn stated, staring out onto the ice as Cincinnati threatened again.
‘What? Robyn, honey, no,’ Pam answered immediately.
‘I said get a uniform on him. As soon as he’s ready, Brad’s coming off,’ Robyn informed determinedly.
Bob spoke up. ‘I think you’re making a mistake, Robyn, the team feeling is—’
‘In a few days, I’m gonna know for sure whether Jason was responsible or not, okay? You won’t let me play, Brad’s playing like crap and Jason’s good. It’s a decision,’ Robyn told them. ‘A manager’s decision. For the good of the Panthers.’
‘Should I go get him?’ Grant asked eagerly.
‘Yes, Grant, go and get him. Tell him to get all over their number twenty-five. Cole! Watch the space there. You’re giving them too much!’ Robyn screamed.
*
‘We’re swapping out? You want Brad off?’ Cole asked, skating up to Robyn.
‘Yeah, get him off. Jon is coming on,’ Robyn replied.
‘Who is it for real?’
‘Don’t get mad.’
‘What?’
‘It’s Jason,’ Robyn informed him.
‘Are you kidding me?’ Cole exclaimed in horror.
‘Listen, you know I would do anything for the Panthers, right? Well, I’m doing this. Brad’s shocking, he can’t hold onto the puck to save his life, and if he keeps it up, we’re gonna lose big time. Jason’s a good player and…’
‘Robyn, I w
ant to kill the guy. You let him on here, I’ll put him in the boards myself,’ Cole stated.
‘I don’t think he did it any more,’ Robyn said with a swallow.
‘We don’t know anything yet,’ Cole told her.
‘Look, I’m playing Jason. Call it a gut instinct. Just make sure you call him Jon and tell Brad to come off,’ Robyn ordered him.
‘Okay, I guess,’ Cole reluctantly agreed.
He skated back to the center of the ice as the referee prepared to restart the game.
‘What’s going on? Who’s kitted up?’ Brad wanted to know.
‘Jon. You’re going off for a while,’ Cole informed him.
‘That isn’t Jon,’ Brad remarked.
‘Look, get over there and swap out or we’re gonna get trashed,’ Cole warned as Mickey picked up the puck and prepared to pass it off.
*
‘Robyn, thanks for giving me a chance. I can’t tell you how much it means,’ Jason said, preparing to take to the ice.
‘I don’t wanna hear how much it means. Just go out there and play hard for the Panthers. I don’t want anything else, you got that?’ Robyn said, unable to meet his eye.
‘I got it,’ Jason responded as Brad came over to the side of the ice.
‘Jason! You’re replacing me with Jason? What the hell is going on around here?’ Brad blasted angrily as Jason headed for the center of the rink.
‘Keep your voice down and get off the ice, Brad, go and take a shower. You’re not going back on,’ Robyn told him.
‘This is bullshit! You’re taking me off for him? Him, Robyn!’
‘Shut up! You sound like a five-year-old who isn’t getting his own way. I’m taking you off because you’re playing like you’ve never held a stick in your life. I’m putting on Jason because I don’t have anyone else!’ Robyn screeched, holding her ribs as she yelled.
‘Everything okay?’ Grant asked, stepping forward in a bid to be peacemaker.
‘Oh yeah! Everything’s great! Just peachy!’ Brad blasted.
He vaulted the side of the rink and began stomping back toward the locker rooms.
‘What are we gonna do about him?’ Grant asked.
‘I’ve no idea,’ Robyn admitted.
*
‘Come on Panthers! There’s just over three minutes to go, a one-nil loss would be something of a miracle,’ Grant said.
‘Go Panthers! Go Panthers!’ Sierra and Sienna chanted, waving their pompoms about keenly.
‘Cole looks done in,’ Robyn remarked as Cole attempted to keep pace with the fresh legs of a new Cincinnati player.
‘They all do. We need some new players in the squad. Come on Mickey! Stay with him!’ Grant said.
‘Pass it forward!’ Robyn screamed, seeing that Jason was unmarked.
Mickey slotted the puck to Jason, Jason turned, laid it off to Henrik, who looked up and hit home, rifling the puck into the top of the net. The light went on, the horns were let off, and the home crowd expressed their delight with the goal.
‘Yes! Yes!’ Robyn exclaimed delightedly.
‘Way to go, J… Jon!’ Grant yelled proudly.
‘Yay Panthers!’ Sienna and Sierra screamed ecstatically.
The team bundled onto Henrik excitedly and Jason looked over at the bench, a smile from ear to ear.
‘He did well,’ Robyn said, seeing the delight on Grant’s face.
‘Thank you, Robyn’ Grant started.
‘Don’t thank me. Come on Panthers! See it out!’ Robyn shouted.
*
‘What happen here? It look like storm come through,’ Henrik remarked as the team arrived in the locker room after the match.
Clothes were strewn about the floor, all the showers were running, and the door of Cole’s locker had been ripped from its hinges.
‘Shit, this is Brad,’ Mickey said immediately.
‘What the hell? Where’s my stuff man?’ Wade wanted to know.
‘I’m gonna find him,’ Cole said, looking at his wrecked locker and his stuff lying on the wet floor.
‘Oh, no you don’t. I don’t think you half-killing him is the right way to sort this out,’ Mickey said, grabbing hold of Cole’s arm.
‘I’m just gonna talk to him. He’s making things difficult for Robyn. She doesn’t need that,’ Cole said, hating that Robyn had to deal with both the Jason situation and Brad.
‘Maybe I could talk to him,’ Jason suggested quietly.
‘Are you kidding me? He hates you! We all hate you, actually. Get showered, get dressed and get out of here,’ Mickey ordered him.
‘I was just trying to…’
‘Here is my shower gel, you can use,’ Henrik said, throwing Jason the bottle.
The door opened and Robyn and Grant entered the room.
‘Guys! You were amazing tonight! I… what’s happened in here?’ Robyn asked, seeing the changing area in complete disarray.
‘Brad’s happened. He’s half-flooded the place and he’s pulled the door off of Cole’s locker and he’s thrown our clothes everywhere,’ Wade said.
Robyn bit her lip, looking at the mess, sensing his anger as if it were still hanging around the room.
‘We’ll clean it up,’ Mickey suggested.
‘No, leave it,’ Robyn said and she bolted from the room.
When Robyn arrived in the main bar, she could see Brad was already on the scotch. Ely, one of the stewards, was chatting to him, and there were a small group of high-school girls sitting alongside him, autograph books on the bar.
‘Put the glass down, you’re coming with me,’ Robyn stated angrily, coming up behind him.
‘Oh, here she is girls, the manager of the Panthers. If you wanna say anything about her choice of substitution tonight, now would be a good time,’ Brad said, turning to face Robyn and smiling at his admirers.
‘Get off the stool, Brad and come and clean up your mess,’ Robyn spoke warningly.
‘My mess? Oh no, Robyn, I think you’ve got that all wrong! You’re the one in a mess; in fact, totally freaking messed up,’ Brad snarled.
‘I’m not gonna ask you again,’ Robyn stated, her temper rising.
‘Good! Because to be honest, I’m sick of hearing anything you have to say!’ Brad snapped.
‘You either go back to that locker room and clear up the mess, or you’re off the team—permanently,’ Robyn said.
‘You can’t do that. Eddie’ll be back in a few weeks and, as soon as he is, I’ll be reinstated as captain.’
‘You think he’s gonna have you back as captain in this state? You could barely skate out there tonight,’ Robyn yelled at him.
‘You don’t have enough players to drop me,’ Brad reminded her smugly.
‘Grant’s preparing signing-on papers for Jason,’ Robyn snapped back.
‘You have got to be kidding! You’d have him on the team over me?’ Brad exclaimed, swaying unsteadily on his feet.
‘Yes,’ Robyn answered.
‘Why are you doing this to me?’ Brad asked.
The tone of his voice had changed. Suddenly, he looked hopeless, the anger gone, his whole body language showing deflation.
‘I’m not doing anything to you,’ Robyn said with a swallow.
She hated seeing him like this. He was a friend, she had known him forever. But this part of him she didn’t recognize. She had never seen him act this way. She didn’t know the anger or the vulnerability. Was this what he’d been like when Michelle left him and he went off the rails?
‘Yes, you are, just like you used to. Always wanting to be in charge, always thinking you’re right, telling me what to do, not doing what you should have been doing,’ Brad continued, his eyes glazing over.
It was as if he wasn’t really there. The body looked like Brad, but it was as if it was just an empty shell and the real him was absent from the room.
‘I don’t know what you’re talking about. I think you should go home and sober up,’ Robyn said, turning her back on him.
‘You and Cole, you won’t last,’ Brad called out to her.
‘Yeah? Why’s that?’ Robyn asked, spinning back to face him.
‘Because he isn’t me and you belong with me. When you’ve gotten over this temporary infatuation, you’ll realize that,’ Brad said with a determined nod.
Robyn gritted her teeth tight together and approached him. Any pity she felt was fast evaporating.
‘I wouldn’t be with you even if you had season tickets at the Red Wings and pit passes at the monster trucks. Do you understand that?’ Robyn said.
‘I don’t believe you,’ Brad said almost defiantly.
‘I want you out. I want you off this team and I want you out of my life,’ Robyn yelled as Cole, Grant, Bob, Pam and the twins hurried into the bar.
‘Is everything alright here?’ Grant asked, stepping up to Robyn’s side ahead of anyone else.
‘Is everything alright here? Are you crazy? Your son’s gotten my place on the team!’ Brad exclaimed, staring at Grant with wild eyes.
‘Listen, Brad, I know things aren’t going so swell for you right now, but we need you on the team, of course we do. We can talk about things and—’
‘No, we can’t talk about things. I’ve made my decision… I want him gone, now. I want him out of the bar and out of the arena—gone,’ Robyn interrupted savagely.
‘Robyn!’ Pam remarked, shocked at the bitterness in Robyn’s voice.
‘D’you know, Cole? D’you know this marriage stuff has nothing to do with you? You could be anyone. This is the way Robyn deals with things. She gets scared by something, something that happens, maybe a feeling, and then she throws herself headlong into something else, anything else, any project she can. Like the hockey team. Like the roadhouse. Like Eddie. Like you. She knows how she feels about me and it frightens her. It frightens her enough to think about marrying someone else,’ Brad announced to the room.
‘You need to leave. You need to go drink some coffee,’ Cole said.
‘Truth hurt?’ Brad said with a sneer.
‘Right, we’re done here. Ely, some assistance please,’ Bob called to the steward as he took hold of one of Brad’s arms.
‘All right! I’m going. But it doesn’t change things and you’ll see that, Robyn! You’ll see that!’ Brad told her, looking straight at her.