I turn back to face him, my eyes desperately searching his, and he leans his forehead against mine. I lift up my hands and push his chest, pushing him off me, and stand.
“Ella?” Desperation clings to his tone. I turn back to look at him, unbothered by my nudity. I walk over to my wardrobe and open it. I pull a few clothes away from the top shelf and drop them to the floor. I stare at the black box for a moment and reach up higher to lift it down, then carry it over to the bed and place it in front of Luke.
“What’s this?” he asks, nerves flowing through his words.
“It’s all my reasons.”
He takes off the lid and sighs heavily when he sees inside. He pulls out each piece of paper and puts it next to him. Old prescriptions and new ones, all kept from the age of thirteen to now. Once he has removed them, he gets to the part I want him to see. It’s the only photo of Luke and me from prom. He lifts the photo out of the box and runs his index finger down the rip in the middle that has been put back together with tape.
“We were so young.” He looks over at me. “Please come back and sit with me.”
I move the box and the prescriptions to the floor and sit side by side with him. “I kept it because it was all I had left.”
His fingers draw lines on my arm, all the way to my fingers. He entangles his fingers with mine and I turn back to face him. He looks into my eyes and gently presses his lips to mine. I take my free hand and put it on his cheek; it’s stubbly and soft to touch. He lets go of my hand and cups my face as he deepens the kiss. I open my mouth to him and his tongue slides along mine. I suck on his tongue and he groans into my mouth. He pulls me beneath him and stops kissing me.
“It’s okay,” I whisper, and he closes his eyes briefly.
“It’s not.” He sighs and kisses my lips again. “We’re fine. We can be fine.”
“We’re fine.”
His lips catch mine and this time they don’t let go. His fingers dance and trace all over my skin, making it come alive, and goose bumps grow.
His arousal is thick and hard against my thigh, taunting his boxer shorts, desperate to escape. I slip my fingers beneath the cotton material and he gasps slightly. I wrap my fingers around him.
What are we doing?
It’s fine. It’s okay. He told me it’s okay.
I grip him firmer and let myself become familiar with him.
“Fuck.” He growls and flips me over so I’m under him. “I’m going to fuck you now, Ella.”
Oh, of course. He doesn’t love me. So we won’t be making love then.
His mouth crashes against mine, his lips no longer soft and timid, but rough and desperate. Our tongues entangle.
He slides his boxers off and rests himself against my entrance. I close my eyes, ready for him, but he runs his calloused fingers down my cheek.
“Please, watch us, baby. Remember us.”
I search his emerald eyes, searching for what he can possibly be thinking. We can’t be us. We’re not us.
He slides into me and his fullness makes me gasp. He takes my mouth again. He starts to really move, fitting and becoming the mold we used to be. With every thrust, I moan as he hits me square on every time. I lift my hips and wrap my legs around his back. My muscles clench around him, desperate to let go.
“Not yet.” He groans beside me as if he knows. “We can go together.”
I match him thrust for thrust. “Luke,” I moan, desperate.
“I know. I know, baby. I’m nearly there.” He threads his fingers through my hair and lifts me so I’m practically sitting on him. He’s slowed down, the anticipation now swimming in my veins. “Now, baby. Now,” he whispers, and catches my lips. We swallow each other’s groans, our orgasms blending into one.
Into something we shouldn’t have allowed to happen.
CHAPTER SEVEN
I smile.
The ceiling looks good from down here.
Sex.
Sex with Luke James.
Sex with the man who has taken my heart, trampled all over it, and handed it back to me.
Fuck. What is happening to me? It’s happening again. I built myself up into some strong, or at least trying to be, strong woman and ended up broken and weak, and on the damn floor again.
Someone’s banging on my bedroom door.
“Come in!” I yell.
“What’re you doing, Ella?” Daisy asks, and I turn my head to face her, but it’s not her face I see, it’s her feet.
“I’m feeling sorry for myself. Is that okay?”
She laughs and sits on the floor next to me. “Cold pizza?” She tilts her head to the side and places a pizza box on the floor.
“Geez, you know how to show a girl a good time, hey babe?” I giggle and sit up, and she opens the box.
“I’m just worried about you.” Her blue eyes are sad.
“I know. I’m sorry. I’m just feeling a little lost right now. With the whole Luke thing. Everything really. I can’t face work tomorrow. I have a meeting with the board to discuss a possibility to open a publishing house here in New York. I’m just so worried.” I take a slice of pizza and fold it in half. Daisy watches me and we both burst out laughing.
“You’re such a weirdo,” she teases, and takes a bite of pizza. “I know you’re worried. I know about the meeting already. You forget I’ve been doing your job whilst you sort yourself out.” She lifts a perfectly tweezed eyebrow and I laugh.
“I know. I’m sorry. Well, I vote drinks tonight so I can forget, and we can move on from Luke James.”
“You mean you can?”
“Yeah, that’s what I mean.” I laugh and we finish off our pizza, and I forget for a little while.
****
I’m in a white, skin-tight dress, and gloriously beautiful five-inch black stilettos. As I’ve grown up, I’ve fallen more and more in love with shoes. What is that? Does that happen to every woman?
I stare in the mirror at the unrecognizable person in front of me. Daisy’s done my hair, and it falls in soft chocolate curls down my back. It nearly reaches my ass. I love how long my hair is now. My makeup is dark, the blue of my eyes piercing and dominant. I don’t care how tonight ends. Luke clearly doesn’t want me; he’s not spoken to me since we had sex. Used and abused. As per usual.
“Ready?” Daisy shouts from the living area, and I walk out to her. “Wow.” She looks me up and down. “Jesus, never mind giving a guy a heart attack, I think I might have one!” She laughs and finishes the champagne in her flute.
“Now you’ve had your coronary, shall we go?” I hold out my hand to her. She entangles our fingers and we search the city for a club.
The club is loud and I’m desperate for a drink. I haven’t drunk properly since Nathan. Well… since that happened. Daisy pulls me toward the bar and we take a seat on two spare stools.
“What’ll it be, beauties?” the bartender asks, and I smirk at Daisy.
“Can we have two tequila slammers and two Forbidden Loves, please?”
The bartender leans forward and kisses my cheek. “I love when a beautiful girl orders a forbidden drink.”
Daisy looks over at me. “Am I meant to follow?” She laughs.
“If you order a Forbidden Love at a bar, the bartender, man or woman, has to kiss the customer. I guess he chose my cheek. I lost.” I laugh out loud and Daisy does too.
“I’ll have to remember that!”
I wink at her as two tequila slammers are put in front of us. He places two napkins over the glasses and winks at me.
“Cheeky,” I mouth, and he laughs. “Ready?” I ask Daisy as she takes her tumbler.
“As always!”
We place our palms over the top of the glasses and napkins, bang the glasses on the side, and swallow the liquid as quick as we can.
As I finish it off, two red cocktails are placed in front of us.
“Amore Vietato. Forbidden Love,” the bartender says to me.
“What’s your name?” I ask hi
m, and he grins. His teeth are a beautiful white.
“Daniel. And I get off at three.” He smiles at me and goes back to working the bar.
“You’re insatiable.” Daisy laughs and takes a sip of her cocktail. “This is so good!” She takes a larger sip.
I slip my fingers into the glass, pull out a strawberry, and take it between my lips. It’s filled with alcohol and tastes so damn good.
I’m being stared at.
I can feel his stare.
I look behind me and scan the club but I can’t see him.
I turn back and Daisy looks at me curiously. “Let’s finish these and dance our asses off until I can’t feel my feet anymore. Sound good?”
The dance floor is full. Daisy and I dance together for a while before she finds some guy to occupy her. I feel hands on my hips, swaying with me to the beat of the music. The alcohol is now swimming through my bloodstream, helping me forget the life I no longer want to be a part of.
His hands move up to my ribs and his mouth is against my neck. We dance like this for a while before I feel him being ripped away from me.
I turn around. “Hey!” I shout to the guy who’s pulled him off me. “Leave him alone!”
“Just following my instructions, Ma’am.”
I follow this guy and carefully step over the man I was dancing with. He’s actually pretty good-looking. Oh well. I follow him through the crowd and he starts to walk up a staircase. The security guy stands in front of me before I can walk up there.
“VIPs only. Sorry,” he says firmly.
I’m becoming seriously pissed. Who instructs someone to pull me away from a perfectly good guy I was dancing with?
I sit in a booth, my right leg crossed over my left, and I watch. I watch like a hawk.
A leggy blonde bounces down the stairs. She's absolutely beautiful. She walks toward me and I immediately tense up, worried about who she is. She completely disregards me, but some guy next to her feels her ass and she grabs his hand and leads him outside. As if that wasn't obvious what's going to happen.
I sigh.
The only person I can think of it being would be Luke. But he's clearly not here.
Before I can swallow my thoughts, he’s charging down the stairs. He aims right for me and I back into the booth, like the furniture will swallow me whole and save me.
“Follow me, right now. “
“I don’t want to go anywhere with you!” I spit at him.
“If you don’t follow me right fucking now, I’ll drag you outta that booth and make a scene in front of everyone. Your choice.” His eyes are dark, full of anger.
“No,” I barely whisper, and he grabs my arm. “Let go or I’ll scream.”
A small smile lifts the corner of his mouth. “Nobody would hear you. Now please, Ella.” He lets go of my arm but grabs onto my hand instead. I let him pull me from the booth and he drags me through the crowd. He’s going to pull my arm from its damn socket in a minute. He barges past the security guy who wouldn’t let me in, and I smile at him apologetically. Luke pulls me into a private room and locks it from the inside.
I back up and realize I’m trapped when all I can feel is a wall behind me. Luke’s eyes invade me, looking from my feet and stopping on my breasts for a second.
“I want to fuck you in nothing else but those damn shoes.” He growls and launches toward me. He grabs my wrists and holds them above my head in a hard grip. He removes one of his hands, the free hand curves around my jaw, and he kisses me softly.
“I’m so sorry, baby. I’m sorry I didn’t call you.” His lips kiss mine so softly, so gently, it makes everything that hurts go away, just briefly. “Please forgive me,” he whispers against my swollen mouth, and I nod.
I’m going to be hurt again. I know it. He releases my wrist, bites my bottom lip and groans deep into my mouth.
My core fills with excitement, desperate to feel our connection again. His hand slides down my side until it’s resting on my ass. His mouth becomes hungrier and we become an intense battle of lips and tongues. I tangle my fingers in his hair and suck on his tongue. He groans and lifts me up. I wrap my legs around his waist and his fingers twist in my hair. He tugs harshly, but I ignore the pain and focus solely on my pleasure. He pushes me against a wall, hard, and kisses those sensitive spots on my neck. I let out a moan in pleasure and he smiles against my skin. He licks from my collarbone up to behind my ear and I tip my head back, pushing me from the wall slightly. My chest pushes into his, my nipples firm and desperate for his touch. Luke kisses the swell of my breast and pulls the V-neck of my dress down so my breast is exposed. His calloused thumb teases my nipple, stroking over it once, then twice. I moan and he laughs.
“God, you’re beautiful.” His tongue licks a leisurely line over my breast and across my nipple. Desire explodes inside me and I hold his mouth to my nipple as he licks and sucks gently. He pushes down the other side of my dress and continues his torture.
This feels…. oh, so right.
But it feels so wrong too.
He drops me back onto my heels and his fingers dance up my thighs. He pushes my dress up on his journey so my panties are exposed.
“Fuck.” He groans and pushes them to the side. He slides a finger between my wet folds and I moan with anticipation. “So ready for me, baby,” he whispers in my ear, and I push my chest harder against him. He slips in a finger and I clench my muscles around him. “Holy shit. So fucking tight.” He slides his finger in and out, inserting a second one once I’m stretched a little more. I bite his bottom lip and pull it between my teeth.
“I’ll always regret that fucking day.” He growls against my mouth. “That day I let the sexiest woman on this whole fucking planet go.”
I moan at the sensations then bite his earlobe and lick it gently after.
We both turn toward the door at the loud bang from outside. He abruptly pulls his fingers from me and wipes them on the inside of his jacket.
“Luke? Baby, are you in there?” a woman shouts from the other side of the door.
“Are you kidding me? You fucking dick!” I scream. He puts his palm over my mouth before I can say anything else. I pull my dress down and put my panties right. Fuck this. I bite his palm and he pulls it away quickly.
“You bitch!” He groans and holds his hand.
I laugh. “Nice to know how you really feel.” I unlock the door and open it to the blonde bimbo who was bouncing around with guys earlier.
“Hi.” She tilts an eyebrow and gives me a small smile. “Sorry, I’m confused. Who’re you?”
God, she seems so innocent. “My name’s Natalie. I was just taking Mr. James’ drink order.” She nods and walks through, jumping into Luke’s arms.
“I’ll have a Martini, please,” she says as she turns to me. Luke pulls her chin back to face him and kisses her deeply. His eyes don’t leave mine, and tears beckon at the emotional pit inside me. I look back, just briefly, and he has her completely surrendered to him. He pushes her into the wall like he did with me just a few moments ago.
So that’s Leona.
And she’s fucking beautiful.
****
I waited around for Daniel.
He took me home.
He fucked me against my bedroom wall and only pleasured himself.
Then he left.
And I was left empty. Again.
Why do I let people walk all over me?
Now I’m sitting at my work desk, wearing a slim black pencil skirt. Underneath though, I have something so provocative, I can’t believe I even did this to myself. I have a loose white chiffon top tucked into the top of my skirt, and four-inch heels on. I have a meeting with Luke and so many other board members, so I read up on today’s presentation and make my way to the boardroom.
Oh, fuck. My boss is walking toward me and I really don’t want to deal with a thigh graze today.
“Mr. Scott,” I say, and he flashes his stained teeth at me. He’s so old and creepy.
“I’ve practiced my presentation. I trust he’ll accept my proposal for the new publishing house.” I smile with pride.
“I’m sure he will. We’re giving you the benefit of the doubt here, Ms. Stone. Myself and other members of the board have given you a chance. If you don’t deliver today, I’m afraid it’ll be bad news for you. Probably the mail room.” He kisses my cheek. “See you soon.” He attempts to hold my hip but I pull away and walk toward the coffee machine. I need a fucking espresso. Times ten. I’m pretty sure I can get him done for some kind of sexual harassment.
I make myself a strong white coffee and take the elevator to the eleventh floor. My nerves are bubbling now. I’m so worried about seeing Luke today, especially after last night and all that happened. As the elevator reaches my destination, I breathe in deep and step out. Coffee and notes in hand, I walk to the reception desk.
“Hi,” I say to the young woman behind the desk. She doesn’t look up. I clear my throat.
“Can’t you see I’m busy?” she practically shouts at me.
“Sorry,” I murmur and she looks up again.
She rolls her eyes. “Name?”
“Ella Stone.”
She looks down at what I assume is a visitor form then looks back up at me. “Sorry, Ms. Stone. I didn’t realize.” She points to a door. “The meeting room is right through there.”
Nodding, I give her a soft smile. She obviously has issues. I can’t imagine why Luke would hire someone like that.
Pushing on the chrome handle and walk into a very empty boardroom. I wander in and familiarize myself with my surroundings. I put my coffee down on the long walnut-colored table and pull out a seat.
I open up some of the notes I made and read through them one last time before I present them to a bunch of people I barely know. The door opens and closes and I look up.
Beautiful. That’s all I can say. Luke walks toward me, the sleeves of his shirt rolled up to his elbows, his tattoo on show. I look down at his feet and smile – Converse.
Always and Forever (Always #2) Page 5