The Trouble With Curses

by Anara Bella

  He knocked. There was no answer, but he knew she was there. He felt it, so he knocked again. “Selena, it’s me.”

  There was a long, telling silence followed by an indignant, “Go away.”

  She was obviously not happy with his hasty retreat earlier tonight and he didn’t blame her. He was a complete shit for running out on her like a heartless cad indulging in a one-night-stand. No apology or word of explanation. It had been a knee-jerk reaction, but still there was no excuse for it. “I can’t. We have to talk.”

  An even longer silence. “If you’re here to apologize, you can do it through the door and then go away.”

  What could he say? Vampire or not, he’d slept with her and the way he’d taken off on her was completely unacceptable. “You’re right, I do owe you an apology, but that’s not why I’m here. We need to talk, and it’s not a conversation we can have through the door.”

  After another long pause, a chair scraped and footsteps headed his way. The door opened and Selena stood there looking even more beautiful than when he’d left her earlier.

  She also looked angry as hell.

  His mind flashed back to the hot sex they’d had just hours before, when she’d looked anything but angry. All soft and glowing and pleasantly spent. It felt like a lifetime ago.

  Leaving the door open, she turned and headed back into the apartment. “Say what you have to say and then get out.”

  He followed her in and closed the door behind him. His mind raced with various ways to ease into this impossible conversation, but none of them felt right. After tossing them all out he realized there was no right way and just blurted out why he was there, “Are you a vampire?”

  Judging by the way her back and shoulders tensed, he realized he should have started with something a bit more mundane, but he couldn’t help asking the one thing he needed to know more than anything else. The only thing that mattered.

  He’d obviously forgotten how to be subtle.

  She threw back her shoulders and turned to face him, her eyes wide and disbelieving. “What did you say?”

  “Tell me you’re not a vampire.” It was what he was desperate to hear. Needed to hear.

  Her eyes searched his, and he could see her mind was racing with a myriad of thoughts. “Why would you ask me something like that? Vampires don’t exist.”

  Despite her words, he could already see the answer in her eyes. Lying didn’t come naturally to her. “We both know that’s not true, don’t we?”

  Rafe scrutinized her as she fiddled with the hem of her top, clearly thinking her answer over very carefully before relenting. “Yes.”

  “Yes, what? That they exist, or you’re a vampire?” He was such a fool. He all but held his breath waiting on her answer. Everything hinged on it. Deep down, he already knew what she’d say, but he had to hear the words come out of her mouth.

  She closed her eyes and then opened them. “Yes to both.”

  He blinked. Charged silence strung out between them.

  Stunned by the impact of her words, his mind stalled. But it didn’t last long as his brain jolted out of its stasis teeming with a jumbled mishmash of thoughts. The predominant one being, she’d said it. She’d said the words.

  He hadn’t had a clue how he would respond if she said yes, but he wouldn’t have said it would be with shock and confusion. Relieved if she said no, angered if she said yes. But instead, here he stood feeling as if he’d been broadsided.

  It was stupid. He’d known she’d say yes way before he got here. Hell, back when he’d run like a coward from this very apartment, he’d known, although he’d refused to acknowledge it. But now that she’d come right out and admitted it, he couldn’t seem to take it in.

  It was too incredible to believe. The beautiful woman he’d only hours before had the most amazing sex of his life with was a vampire. How could it be? Hell, she fainted at the sight of blood for God’s sake. None of this made any sense.

  Suddenly, as if the switch had been flicked back on his emotions, everything inside him raged against the truth. He didn’t want to hear it. See it. Believe it. It couldn’t be true. It absolutely, indisputably, irrefutably, couldn’t be true.

  But it was.

  She’d deceived him and let him believe she was a normal woman. Someone worthy of love and respect.

  But she wasn’t. Not even close.

  She was a God-damned vampire.

  And vampires deserved to die. Everyone knew that. They killed innocent people, sucked the very lifeblood out of them in order to survive. Death was the only way to deal with them. It was what they deserved. And it was what he was destined to do. It was, after all, who he was.

  A vampire slayer.

  And Selena was a vampire. Prophecy be damned. It was his responsibility to kill her.

  His alone.

  Without allowing himself any further thought, his hand reached inside his jacket’s inner pocket and wrapped around the stake he always kept there.

  Feeling its shape had always been comforting in the past. It was his friend, and had saved his life on many occasions. But tonight, it felt more like an enemy. Like the weapon it was.

  The destroyer of someone he cared about, maybe even loved. But none of that mattered now.

  He pulled the stake out of his pocket and watched the realization of what he held etch itself across Selena’s shocked face. He steeled himself to do what he must. It was his job. No, it was more than his job, it was his calling, his heritage.

  His duty.

  Selena backed away from him. “What’s going on?”

  He took a step towards her. “It’s very simple. You’re a vampire. I’m the slayer.”

  Her head shook back and forth. “Slayers don’t exist. It’s just a myth. Something made up for books and movies, to entertain the masses.”

  “They exist. Just like vampires exist. Didn’t your fellow vamps tell you?”

  She uttered nothing but a barely there “no”.

  Rafe ignored the tug on his heart and willed his senses to pick up the fact that she was a vampire. He scoured her face, her eyes, her aura—but nothing.

  Damn it! She’d already admitted she was a vampire, but he still couldn’t see it. Not in her eyes, which were devoid of evil. Nor in her bearing. At the very least, he should have been able to smell that unique combination of freshly spilled human blood and pure evil a mile away, and yet here she was, right in front of him and still nothing.

  How is this that possible?

  He raised the stake. “I have to do this, Selena. It’s my duty to rid the world of your kind. It’s what I do, what my family has always done.”

  Nothing. He sensed nothing.

  He frantically sought any sign of the evil within her, but it wasn’t there. It didn’t exist.

  An overwhelming feeling of doubt and disbelief filled his soul. Selena should have shown her true self by now. She should be vamped-out and fighting him with pure hatred in her eyes, looking for ways to kill him. Instead she just stood there looking sad and yet proudly resigned at the same time.

  “If you figure it’s what you have to do, Rafe, then do it. Kill me.” With that, she took his hand, the one that held the stake, and pressed its deadly point against her breast. “Do it.”

  He looked into her beautiful clear-green eyes, devoid of anything even remotely evil.

  If anything, a strange purity resided in their depths. The very last thing a vampire should possess, could ever possess, was purity of any kind, and yet there it was.

  Pure goodness.

  No vampire looked like this.

  He gripped the stake harder and willed himself to ignore what he saw, to do what he had to do. There was something wrong with him. There had to be. The Crystals had missed something. She was a vampire, whether he could sense it or not. She deserved to die.

  And yet, and yet…

  In sheer desperation, he searched her eyes once more for the evidence he needed to be able to follow through. But it wasn�
��t there. It just wasn’t there, no matter how hard he searched.

  And then it hit him. Was this what the mark meant when the prophecy said the marked one would be a vampire and yet not a vampire? Was she special not only as the prophesied mate, but in her intrinsic goodness? Was this the reason he couldn’t sense she was a vampire, because she wasn’t a true vampire at all? It seemed too far-fetched to believe, but could it be? He didn’t know.

  He just didn’t know.

  And without proof that she was evil he couldn’t do it. He just couldn’t.

  Killing her wasn’t an option he could live with.

  Feeling defeated and yet strangely relieved, he lowered his hand and dropped the stake to the floor. It clattered and rolled away, sounding unnaturally loud in the deathly quiet surrounding them, finally stopping when it hit the wall. Minutes passed where no one moved or made a sound. As if neither of them wanted to break that silence.

  Or was able to.

  Chapter Fourteen

  Selena watched in disbelief as the stake hit the wall and finally stopped its harsh clattering. Even now her stomach was clenched in tensed-up readiness for the final blow that had never come. She’d been sure it would, but for some unknown reason Rafe hadn’t gone through with it, and she had absolutely no idea why.

  In a bizarre way she almost felt let down. Or maybe she was overwrought. The range of emotions that had ripped through her in the last few hours was staggering.

  Earlier, Rafe had shown her ecstasies she hadn’t dreamt existed. Then she’d been angry and hurt at the way he’d abandoned her after they’d shared what she thought was something special. She’d been furious when he first showed up at the door, then hopeful he would apologize for his atrocious behavior earlier tonight. That had shifted with lightning speed to disbelief and fear when he’d said he was the slayer.

  But now, after all of that, she was just exhausted and numb. Completely worn out emotionally and physically, and not at all sure what to think of this latest turn of events.

  Why hadn’t he staked her? He’d looked determined enough to do it when she’d admitted she was a vampire. Determined enough that she’d simply given in to the inevitability of it.

  In fact, she’d been strangely at peace in that moment. Maybe even relieved. For herself, because her secret was finally out, and for him, because she understood why he felt he needed to kill her. How could she not? She hated vampires as much as he did. But considering how angry she was just a short time ago, it didn’t make any sense that she felt at peace after their strange and intense altercation. She should have been angrier than she’d been before. And yet, there it was.

  Maybe it was because she could see how conflicted Rafe was. Or maybe she had stronger feelings for him than she was allowing herself to believe. Or maybe she was just a stupid sap. “What’s the matter? Am I so beneath you that you can’t even bring yourself to stake me?”

  Rafe barked a harsh laugh that dripped with bitterness. “If only it were so simple.”

  “But it is that simple. Earlier, when you ran from my bed, you showed your complete disregard for me. Now that you know I’m a vampire, you must hate me even more.”

  Rafe reached out, but dropped his hand before he touched her. “I don’t hate you. Not even close. And that’s the problem. As the slayer I should hate you.” He shook his head. “No, that’s not right either. I shouldn’t be emotionally involved at all. I should only hate what you are. There should be no hesitation on my part to kill you, and yet I can’t bring myself to do it.”

  Hope foolishly glimmered in her heart. “Did you ever stop to consider I may not be the evil beast you’re determined to think I am?”

  He drew a deep breath and let it out slowly. “Not if you’re a vampire. No.”

  And just like that, the glimmer died. She watched as he raked his fingers through his hair, giving it that sexy sleep-rumpled look she’d seen for the first time only a few short hours ago, and a part of her heart shriveled knowing she’d never see it again.

  The flicker of an idea took root and she latched onto it. “Let me ask you this, did you choose to be the slayer?”

  She saw his confusion at her apparent change in topic. “No. It’s a duty that was passed down to me.”

  Success! “So it wasn’t something you sought out.”

  “No.”

  “You might even consider it a curse, at times.”

  He didn’t hesitate. “Yes.”

  “Well, guess what, I didn’t choose to be a vampire either. Any more than you chose to be the slayer. In fact, I hate vampires and every last thing they represent.” She saw his doubt and turned away. “But I can see you don’t believe me.”

  “You have to admit it doesn’t seem very likely.”

  She hesitated, knowing that with most vampires he was right, but not with her. She had to make him see that. She turned back. “That doesn’t make it any less true. Like it or not, we’re not so different, you and I. You’re fooling yourself if you think we are. Neither of us is happy about the legacy passed on to us. Neither of us asked for it, but your ‘curse’ at least is a good thing. Something you can use to help people. Mine is a horrible thing forced on me by someone I loved and trusted.

  “What you’re not taking into consideration is that I wasn’t asked if I wanted to be a vampire. It was done against my will. You could call it a rape of sorts. I wasn’t even really conscious. My so-called boyfriend had to drug me to do the deed.” She couldn’t keep the bitter sarcasm out of her voice as images of her ex’s hatefully triumphant expression flashed before her. Her lack of appreciation for his “gift” had wiped the smug look off his face pretty fast. It was small consolation, but it was something.

  Seeing Rafe had nothing to say, she continued, “Do you know why he did it? It wasn’t because he loved me or couldn’t bear to be parted from me. It was because I’d discovered he was a vampire and tried to run. Problem was, he wasn’t bored with me yet so he turned me instead of killing me. Turned me into a monster because he wanted a pet, a plaything, someone to control.”

  This time he did touch her face. “I’m sorry.”

  She didn’t want his sympathy and shook off his hand. “The bottom line, Rafe, is that we’re both cursed. Both stuck with something we didn’t ask for and don’t want. If you want to be a hypocrite and condemn me for that, then go ahead. But just remember you are being a hypocrite.”

  Disbelief still dominated his expression. “Most people don’t ask to become a vampire, but once they’re turned, they always become avid killing machines. Why should I believe you’re any different?”

  “You already know I’m different. It’s the reason you couldn’t kill me, isn’t it?” She saw his hesitation and pressed her advantage. “Well, isn’t it?”

  His shoulders seemed to sag in defeat. “That’s part of it, yes. I can’t seem to sense the evil that has to be inside you.”

  “You can’t sense it because it isn’t there. I’ve fought tooth and nail against the curse that was thrust upon me. I’ve found a way to survive that doesn’t entail hurting or killing people. I’ve fought the very nature of this beast that’s inside me, and I’m proud of that.

  “When Ambrose realized there was something different about me, that I wasn’t going to be his murderous playmate to carouse and feed with, he left me to either succumb to the cravings that were driving me insane, or to die. Either way, he didn’t care. I was on my own.”

  Rafe started pacing. “I can’t accept this. I can’t accept any of this. I don’t care what the prophecy says.”

  That caught her attention. “Prophecy? What are you talking about?”

  She watched him as he seemed to choose carefully what to tell her. Was he hiding something? “The past few days have been hell. Tonight alone, I went from having the best sex of my life to complete shock in an instant. It’s the reason I took off like I did.”

  Finally, an explanation. “Why did you take off like that?”

  “The mark
. I saw that damned raven’s mark on your beautiful backside and it totally threw me.”

  She nodded. “I thought that might be it, but it didn’t make any sense. What are you, deathly afraid of beauty marks?”

  Rafe gave her a sad smile. “Of that one, I guess I am. You’ll think I’m crazy, but there’s a prophecy about it in the Slayer Archives.”

  Slayer Archives? “You’re joking, right?”

  “I wish I was. I wish this whole week was just some ridiculous figment of my imagination, but it’s not. It’s a nightmare that all began the night I first laid eyes on you.”

  Ouch. “Gee, thanks.”

  His eyes tried to negate the harshness of his comment but that didn’t help much. “I was at that bar to find a vamp. My sister is a seer. She has visions of where vamps will be. I go to the designated place and kill them. But that night I never found the vamp. It happened again the second time we met. At first I thought it was a coincidence, even though I don’t believe in them, but it never crossed my mind the vamp we were looking for was you. I was ready to believe there was something wrong with me, rather than that there was something ‘off’ with you. When it happened again tonight, I knew it had to be more than a coincidence, but I stubbornly fooled myself it wasn’t possible it was you. I was sure my senses would have told me, and my heart refused to accept it as a possibility. Until I saw that blasted mark. In that moment, it hit me. I had let my lust for you blind me from seeing what was right in front of me all along.”

  “And this mark somehow told you I was a vampire? I have news for you. Not all vampires have a mark like this.”

  “No, only one very special vampire is prophesied to have it. And I guess that vampire is you.”

  “Me?”

  “I could quote you the prophecy, but the upshot is that the vampire with the raven’s mark would be special and bring about great change, ushering in the dawn of a new era of some kind. She would also have major significance for the slayer.”