thirteen
• RULE #13 •
Keep careful records. You never know when you might be asked to clarify something you did in the past.
After her mother died, Kayla’s father began a tradition of heading to Sarasota from the middle of January until the middle of February. He had a good friend who now lived there year-round with his wife, and for an extremely small fee, he stayed in their converted garage. He would spend his time going for walks, playing cards with friends he’d made over the years, and simply enjoying life in sunny Pinecraft, the Amish community nestled in the heart of Sarasota.
Though he’d insisted that he intended to stay in Berlin this year, Kayla encouraged him to go. She needed some space and she reckoned that he did, too.
Standing next to him today at the front door, Kayla had no idea how he would be able to go for so long with only one suitcase and a carry-on. She looked over her packing list.
“Daed, are you sure you have your prescriptions?”
“I’ve double-checked.”
“What about your money card?” He’d started using a credit card two years ago when he discovered just how difficult it was to get to their bank branch in Sarasota.
He patted his wallet. “I’ve got it, daughter. I also have snacks, two bottles of water, two books, and my pillow for the bus ride.” He folded his arms over the new light green shirt she’d sewn and given to him for Christmas. “Now, what about you? Will you need anything around here that I didn’t take care of?”
“I’ll be fine. I promise.”
Still looking at her worriedly, he added, “Try not to spend too much time alone, Kayla.”
“I’ll be working, Father. I’m around people all day. You know that.”
“I’m talking about in your spare time. You have a bad habit of never taking time for yourself. Think about going to one of your friends’ houses for supper or make plans to go walking or somesuch.”
“I will.” Of course, all she wanted at the moment was some time alone to do and eat whatever she wanted.
“I’m going to hope and pray that you aren’t lying to me right now.”
“I’m not, Daed.” Hearing the crunch of the English driver’s tires on the gravel drive, she reached for the door handle. “Now, stop fussing. Bill’s here, right on time. That means you’ve got to go.”
Shrugging on his coat, he nodded. “He’s a gut fella, for sure. Now, give your old father a hug goodbye. I’ll miss you, Kay.”
“I’ll miss you, too. Come home with a tan,” she teased, like she always did.
“I’ll bring you a seashell,” he replied, repeating his standard goodbye as well. Then, without another word, he carried his bag to the car and greeted Bill.
Kayla remained by the door. She already felt his absence, but she didn’t want him to see it on her face. Only when Daed looked back at her before Bill turned left did she raise her hand and wave. She continued to stand there as they vanished from sight, allowing herself to feel the twin emotions that always took hold of her—sorrow that she wouldn’t see her beloved father for thirty days and the burst of pleasure of being on her own. She liked having the house to herself, but being alone in a dark house made her mood almost as dark.
Being so alone at twenty-six was difficult. She was grown and used to managing a household, but she was still young enough to want more. The truth was that even living with her father, she was lonely. She felt out of sync with her friends and even her cousins. All of them were either settling into married life, having children, or looking for the perfect partner to spend a lifetime with. Sometimes when she was around them, Kayla felt like she wasn’t exactly a welcome addition to the group. She was a reminder that sometimes life didn’t work out the way one planned. That, sometimes, nothing did.
She knew she was at fault as well. She felt discontented with herself and not sure what she should do to change that. For a time, she’d even considered leaving her faith and walking among the English. She’d needed a change.
She still needed one. Though her tutoring and sewing were good first steps, she had to admit that sometimes, it wasn’t enough.
She didn’t know what the right decision was. Becoming English might give her more options, but she’d also lose everything that she was. Right now, such a big change didn’t seem worth it.
“You need to stop feeling sorry for yourself, Kayla,” she said out loud. “Mamm wouldn’t like you being in this slump. Not one bit. She’d be telling you right this minute to put your blues away and think of something positive.”
Determined to do just that, Kayla did her best to shake off those blues, put the kettle on to boil, and got out her pencil and paper. Then she did what she did best—she planned. Feeling better, she decided to write down four things she wanted to do over the next few days. She wrote down the most obvious first. Make a peanut butter pie. Peanuts didn’t agree with her father, so she never made anything with them. But she missed some of her most favorite dishes.
Walk two miles every day. She was going to need to get in every step if she was going to eat a whole pie by herself!
Just as she was about to put her pencil to the paper again, the kitchen phone rang.
They might have been New Order and allowed to have a phone, but that didn’t mean it rang often. Surprised, she hurried to pick it up. “Hello?”
“Hey, Kayla. I’m glad you answered.”
It was Aaron. Forcing herself to keep her tone relaxed and cool, she said, “Is something wrong?”
“Jah. Kayla, I’m completely stuck on these word problems. I need your help.”
Now she had a reason to spend some time with him today. Her spirits lifted just thinking of how handsome he was, how steady and calm, and the way she sometimes caught him looking at her like he thought she was pretty. “Want to meet at the coffee shop? I’m free this afternoon.”
“You don’t mind?”
“I don’t mind at all. I’m off work today.”
“Want to meet at Sacred Grounds in two hours? At three?”
“I can do three. I’ll see you there.”
“Thanks so much, Kayla. I really appreciate it.”
“I’m glad you called. Really.”
She walked back to her list, scanned it, and put it to one side. She didn’t see any need to worry about that now. No, she had someone to meet instead.
She decided to go put on a fresh dress.
* * *
Two hours later, at a back corner table in Sacred Grounds, Aaron was staring at Kayla’s caramel latte with misgiving. “That looks like a dessert.”
It did. Tina, the waitress, had added an extra helping of whipped cream and then had topped that with a ribbon of caramel. “It probably is closer to a dessert than a simple drink, but I don’t care. I love it.”
“I’ve never had one of those.” He glanced at his simple cup of black coffee. “I only ever get this.”
“If you never stray from that, then you are missing out, Aaron. These are wunderbaar.” After taking her first sip, she sighed. “My day has just gotten better.”
“And here I thought it was because I called you out of the blue.”
She chuckled, pretending as best she could that his comment wasn’t right on the money. “Sorry, but I fear this drink is my weakness.” She pushed the tall mug toward him. “Take a sip and see what you’ve been missing.”
“I have a feeling I’ll regret this, but nee Danke.”
Kayla pulled it back, a little embarrassed that she’d offered him a sip. He probably wasn’t used to women being so bold.
When she realized he was staring at her, she felt her cheeks heat. “I’m sorry. I guess I’m making quite a spectacle of myself. Uh, let’s get to work.”
He pulled out his notebook but didn’t open it. “You seem different today. Is it just the caramel coffee?”
“Oh, nee. My father left for Pinecraft this morning. He’ll be gone for a month. Even though he goes every year, it catches me off guard.”<
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“I reckon it’s the change in your schedule.”
“Jah.” She shrugged. “I canna explain it, not really. I encourage him to leave and I’ve always refused to go down for even a short spell. He and I need our space. But it still saddens me to lose him, if only for a month.”
“Is there something more to it? Do you get scared living by yourself?”
After trying that on for size, she shook her head. “Nee. It’s the quiet that gets to me, I guess.” She shook her head. “How are you?”
“Me? I’m fine.” He smiled. “No relatives are off to Florida in my haus.”
“Oh. I only asked because you seem a bit preoccupied as well. Is anything new with you?” She glanced at his face, then picked up her drink again. What was she doing, anyway? He’d contacted her for help, not to chat about life in a coffee shop.
“Besides the usual, nothing is too different. Well, nothing besides the fact that we all thought my sister’s beau had finally begun courting, but then it all fell apart, and now the whole house is in a dither.”
“What do you mean?”
“I probably shouldn’t have said anything, but in a nutshell: Joel, my best friend and the man my sister Tiny’s liked forever, finally stepped forward, but then I interfered because I thought he was doing something he shouldn’t. And now Tiny’s upset, my parents are upset, and I feel justified and embarrassed all at the same time.”
“Whoa.”
“I know.” He shrugged one shoulder. “For the record, I’m not proud of sticking my nose where it doesn’t belong… But I can’t regret looking out for my sister. Tiny’s special.”
He sounded so dejected that she almost smiled. “Joel who?”
“Joel Lapp. Do you know him?”
“I know the name, but that’s all. How old is he?”
“Twenty or so.”
“That’s why. He’s several years younger.” And didn’t that just make her feel ancient?
“I’m glad you don’t know him. Like I said, I shouldn’t even be talking about him. Especially not here during our session.”
“I don’t know about that. I’ve found that it helps to share problems.” Not that she had done all that much of it.
“Maybe it’s good that you’re so much older than Tiny and Joel. That way everyone is just names.” When she raised her eyebrows at that “so much older” phrase, he reddened. “I guess that didn’t sound too good, did it?”
She chuckled. “I understood what you meant.”
Aaron looked her in the eye. “It feels like our ages don’t matter much anyway. Whenever we get together, the last thing I ever think about is our age difference.”
“I feel the same way. I’m never sure what age means anymore. Here I am, twenty-six and never been married. I don’t have much in common with most girls my age.” She paused. Then there was her father. He was twenty years older than her, but Kayla often felt like she was the older and wiser one in the house.
She glanced at Aaron, who was studying her intently. “Actually, sometimes I feel like I have more in common with you than most people.”
“Why is that?”
Well, now she just felt foolish. She blurted out the first thing she could think of. “The test, of course.”
“Oh. Of course,” he added quickly. “I mean it’s not like there’s a lot of us Amish worrying about particles and vocabulary and integers, are there?”
“I don’t believe there is.”
“I guess it’s good Sarah Anne put us together, then.”
“Jah. It is gut.” She smiled, but a part of her felt disappointed that they’d just classified their relationship as merely a working one.
Opening the booklet, Aaron said, “Here’s what I can’t seem to figure out.” He pointed to a long paragraph. “I know I’m supposed to use a formula to solve it, but I’m not sure which one.”
“Let’s take it step by step.” She stole another sip of her coffee, then forced herself to dwell on math and not on the rest of her life. That would be better for the both of them.
“Ready,” Aaron said, his pencil poised over his notebook like he was about to begin a race.
She had to smile at that. His excitement and dedication to learning the material echoed so much of what she’d been feeling years ago when she’d prepared for the GED. She embraced that familiarity, finding comfort in it like she did a much-loved sweater. Since there was so much in her world that she wasn’t sure about, she treasured the things that made sense.
Pointing to the first problem, she began to explain both the formula and the variables as well as the basic steps. Aaron followed along, gave it a try, and when he got the right answer, grinned.
“Gut job. Now, let’s tackle the next one.”
“I’m on it.”
She smiled, loving his English expression, even though it would likely sound funny coming from anyone else in the world.
When he was done, she checked the answer, pointed to the next, and he began again.
They continued in the same slow, methodical way, with her explaining and providing examples and Aaron both copying her work and working on his own portions.
Thirty minutes passed, then forty-five. Their time together was flying by, and things were going real well, too. Aaron was making progress. After those few uncomfortable moments when she’d revealed too much and a new awareness between them had bloomed, the study session had become one of their best.
Well, it was, until Missy and Ramon Troyer entered the coffee shop, gaped at her and Aaron, and made a beeline toward their table.
Kayla’s stomach sank. She was fairly sure this was not going to go well.
fourteen
• RULE #14 •
Keep a good selection of read-aloud books on hand. Some days, you’ll feel like there are too many children in the place and you’ll want to retain some order.
Missy, acting just as smug as she had back when they were teenagers and she was the first in their circle to have a steady beau, greeted Kayla like they were still close friends.
They were not.
“Kayla… and Aaron Coblentz. Hello,” Missy called out brightly as her husband, Ramon, shook Aaron’s hand. “Two people I would have never thought to see together.”
“I haven’t seen either of you in ages,” Aaron said as he closed his notebook. “How have you been?”
“Same as always,” Ramon said. “Working.”
Watching the interplay between Aaron and Ramon—and Missy’s obvious interest in her and Aaron—Kayla felt her mouth go dry. Missy had a habit of sticking her nose in places where it didn’t belong and causing trouble. If Kayla wasn’t careful, Missy would start asking Aaron all sorts of embarrassing questions, just because she could.
Aaron said, “It’s a gut day for a cup of hot kaffi, jah?”
“It is,” Ramon replied. “We’ve been out walking and decided we needed some sustenance before heading up the hill home. Why, sometimes I feel like this winter will never end.”
“It has been a long winter, for sure and for certain,” Aaron said.
“What were you two doing when we walked in?” Missy asked. “It looks almost as if you are studying together.”
What could she say? Aaron had closed his notebook, but she had a math textbook in full view. “Well…”
“We’re doing the same thing as you, I suppose,” Aaron said with an easy smile. “It’s too cold to stay outside without taking breaks indoors to get warm.”
Kayla lifted up her mug and took a sip, as if to prove to them that she was enjoying her drink.
“Yes, I guess that’s true.” She shrugged. “So are you two courting now?”
“Missy, that ain’t none of our business,” her husband chided.
“If you are, I’m excited for you. I mean, I think it’s been years since I’ve seen you spend time with any man, Kayla. Not since Levi, right?”
“Are you keeping tabs on me?”
“Of course not. I’m just mak
ing conversation.” Missy smiled, but her cheeks turned red. Obviously when she heard her words, she realized just how bad they sounded. “I’m sorry. Perhaps I shouldn’t have brought Levi up. He’s probably a sore subject.”
“Yet you did bring him up,” Kayla said.
“I hope you’ll forgive me.” She laughed lightly. “I didn’t mean to offend.”
“Oh?” Aaron leaned back and folded his arms across his chest.
“Of course she didn’t mean anything disrespectful, Kayla,” Ramon said in a rush.
“I’m sure you didn’t, Missy,” Kayla said.
When neither Kayla nor Aaron said anything more, the silence grew frostier. Taking the hint, Ramon curved a hand around his wife’s elbow. “Well, we’d better go get those drinks. Good to see you both.” Missy said nothing.
Luckily, there was no one in line, and they were served quickly. Although it looked like Missy wanted to take a seat, her husband shuttled her to the door, probably to save her from embarrassing herself further.
In what had to be one last attempt to gain the upper hand, Missy waved on their way out.
“Enjoy your walk back up the hill,” Kayla said with a smile.
Ramon nodded as they exited.
When they were alone again, Aaron grinned. “I guess we just survived our first public outing.”
“Indeed.” She smiled back at him. “I’m sorry. I should have explained to them that we weren’t a couple, but I’m afraid I simply froze. I couldn’t figure out how to explain our being together without letting your cat out of the bag.”
* * *
Aaron saw it differently. In his opinion, the problem wasn’t that she had led Missy and Ramon to believe they were a couple; the problem was that he liked the idea of it.
“I could have said something as well, but I chose not to. I guess we’re both at fault.”
Brightening, she said, “Honestly, you put Missy right in her place for speculating on us. I don’t know the last person who did that so well! She looked like she’d swallowed her tongue.”
A Perfect Amish Romance Page 9