After giving them both another searching look, her mother disappeared.
“What do you want to talk to me about?” she asked. Unfortunately, she didn’t sound as tough as she’d hoped. That probably had something to do with the fact that her hand was now bleeding well and good all over the bottom of the sink. Just seeing the red stain made her sway on her feet.
“Us. Jane,” he said as he easily helped her sit on top of the kitchen counter.
Usually she would have protested the action, but she was rather happy to be off her feet. Instead, she focused on their conversation. “I don’t want to talk to you about Jane Shultz.”
He frowned. “I don’t think we’re going to be able to talk about anything until you get your bearings. Close your eyes if you have to, but don’t you get all woozy on me.”
Ah, but that was typical Joel. He liked to be in control of a situation, even when he wasn’t. “I’m fine.” Almost.
“You aren’t. And you’re just as obstinate as ever.” He opened several drawers, finally found the first aid kit, and set it on the counter. “Here we go. Let’s get your hand clean. Stay still, now.”
Another time, another day, she would have slapped his hand away and told him she was perfectly capable of putting a bandage on a cut. But the blood was making her a bit squeamish.
After dabbing her cut with a wet paper towel, Joel raised her hand to his lips and blew out little wisps of air. Watching him purse his lips… thinking about how she used to daydream about kissing him… well, it made her crumble even more inside.
He stopped. “You’re wincing. Am I blowing too hard?”
He smelled so good. And his breath? Well, it was so warm against her skin. “Nee,” she answered, her voice strained.
“Are you sure? I don’t want to hurt you.”
“You aren’t. I promise, Joel. It, um, just stings.”
He nodded like it made perfect sense to him. And he would have been right, say, if she had been seven instead of seventeen. Now she just felt foolish. She needed to end this little episode and fast. “I’m fine. Please bandage me up.”
He didn’t smile, but the corners of his eyes crinkled. He was amused. But still, he did as she asked, and before long, her palm was sporting a patch of gauze held in place by some first aid tape. “There. All done.” He looked especially pleased with himself.
She’d kept her mouth shut while he’d been patching her up, but now, holding that hand in front of her, she grimaced. “Oh, Joel. I look like I practically got my hand chopped off, you’ve got so much padding and gauze on it.”
“Are you seriously finding fault with my help?”
“I’m sorry. You are right. Danke.”
“You are welcome.” He held out his hands and helped her hop off the countertop.
She pretended she barely noticed the firm, sure way his hands held her waist. Turning a bit, she started putting everything back in the kit one-handed. “We need to talk about the real reason you stopped by.”
“Well, there’s two.”
“Which are?”
“The first is Jane. She and I only have a business relationship. She is experiencing some health problems and needs help.”
“What kind of health problems?”
“I told her I wouldn’t talk about them.”
Not even to her. “I see. Is there anything else you wanted to tell me?”
“Jah, as a matter of fact. What’s this I heard about Luke calling on you last night?”
“That’s none of your business, Joel.”
“You know it is.”
She didn’t know anything of the sort, which of course, just made her feel even worse about her whole dating situation. “Now that we’ve talked, you may leave.”
He motioned to the bushel of apples. “Don’t you want my help?”
“I do not.”
“But—”
“I am going to be just fine, Joel!”
“Jah, I guess you will be. Goodbye, Tiny.”
She held on tight to her anger as he grabbed his jacket and hat and walked out the door. Never even looking back.
And when the door shut behind him, she picked up that paring knife and got to work again. But this time, she pushed all her pain and anger to one side. Instead, she just kept reminding herself that even though her heart was breaking, she was going to be just fine.
Perhaps one day she’d actually feel that way, too.
seventeen
• RULE #17 •
Accept help from volunteers. Actually, accept help from everyone who offers a helping hand.
Less than one hour after he’d arrived, Joel was striding down the Coblentzes’ front walkway. How had all of his good intentions gone so terribly wrong? One minute, he’d been caring for her cut and loving the fact that she was trusting him so sweetly.
And then, what felt like seconds after, they’d begun arguing again. Instead of listening to his reasons for helping Jane, she’d acted peevish. And then she’d had the nerve to defend her interest in Luke Yoder!
Now, he was frustrated, in need of a shower, and wandering outside in the cold.
He was going to need to go home and come up with a plan B or C. That was obvious. Unfortunately, what wasn’t was how he was ever going to get the chance to put any of those alternate plans into action. Tiny now felt further away from being his fiancée than ever before.
Since he had taken the day off from work to call on her, Joel had several more hours before he had to get home. If he did walk inside now, his mother would quiz him, and his younger brother would waste no time in telling him that he should look around for someone else to court.
Since neither option appealed to him, he kept walking. It was cold and snowy but not frigid. Perhaps in the high thirties? Stuffing his hands in his pockets, he continued along the side of the road.
There was something about a crisp winter day. With the fields barren, most animals, except for a stray deer or two, were in shelters of their own making. And because the roads were covered in packed snow, next to no one was traveling. No vehicles, no buggies.
Just Joel.
He liked the peacefulness of it. Craved it, actually. Though he’d never had a problem getting along with other people and enjoyed a wide variety of friends, there were times when his body needed to recharge and simply think. Which was maybe why it was somewhat ironic that out of all the women in his world, he’d set his sights on Tiny. She lit a room up just by walking into it.
And then there was her family. Oh, the whole lot of them couldn’t be more unlike his own. His parents were reserved, organized, and sedate. He, his brother, Sam, and his sister, Summer, who was now married, were all cut from the same cloth.
The Coblentz family, on the other hand, was messy, disorganized, busy, and chatty. Something new was always going on, and the first time he’d witnessed them sharing a meal, he’d been reminded of a circus.
Now that things with him and Tiny were in disarray and Aaron and Jack had decided that he’d cheated on Tiny, he doubted he’d ever get to be more than just her friend. But, oh, how he wanted so much more.
He was going to miss the lot of them, for sure. But most especially Tiny.
Walking aimlessly, he took a right on a street he hadn’t been on in months. And there, like a beacon he hadn’t even known he was looking for, was the bookmobile.
Deciding that the traveling library would be a good break from the cold, Joel headed inside.
Sarah Anne Miller greeted him with a smile. “Joel Lapp, aren’t you a sight for sore eyes. How are you?”
“I’m good. I canna tell you when the last time we saw each other was. Maybe two months ago?”
“It has to be at least that long. Well, can I help you with anything?”
“Nee. I was just out walking and came upon you. I didn’t know you drove out this way.”
“I don’t usually, but we had a request from a lady who is homebound. Her neighbor brought her over when I first got here, but
it’s been quiet ever since. Winter days are like that, I guess. It’s always hard to find a reason to venture out into the cold, even if it’s for a new book.”
“Ah. Well, I’ll just look around.”
She pointed to one of those coffee machines with all the pods. “I was just about to make a fresh cup of coffee before I head back in an hour. Would you like a cup, too?” She smiled encouragingly. “It might help you keep warm on your walk back home.”
“Jah Kaffi sounds gut.”
“Perfect. Coming right up.”
He walked over to a foldout table that had about thirty books displayed on it. They all looked shiny and new.
“We’ve got some real good books just in. There’s a few biographies and a couple of historicals, if you’ve got a mind for one of those.”
“Danke. I’ll look around.” But as he picked up the various titles, he found himself not paying as much attention to the books as to his problems with Tiny.
Sarah Anne handed him his cup. “Here you go.” She winked. “Whenever I serve coffee to a patron, I always get a little tickled. It makes me feel like I’m working in one of those fancy bookstores in Columbus.”
He smiled. “It does feel a bit like that right now.” He took an experimental sip and discovered, to his surprise, that it was quite good. “Your machine does a good job. Thank you.”
She sipped from her own cup. “I’m glad for the company right now.” Glancing at his empty hands, she said, “I’ve got some mysteries over there if you are interested.”
He shrugged. “I mainly came in to get warm, if you want to know the truth. I… well, I’ve got a bit on my mind right now.”
“I can understand that. Take your time.” She moved over to her desk.
Joel sipped his coffee, enjoying the warmth it brought as much as the jolt of caffeine.
Maybe it was because she wasn’t pressing him for information, but he started talking. “I made some mistakes lately with a girl, and I don’t know how to make things better without betraying some confidences.”
She frowned. “That’s a dilemma, indeed.”
“Any ideas about what to do?”
“Well, I was married for a long time, and my job used to be in accounting. I’m afraid I don’t have too many experiences with rocky relationships.”
“You’ve been blessed, then.”
“I have been.” A shadow crossed her face. “Sometimes I think I didn’t even realize how blessed I was.” She looked at him intently. “I know you’re young, but do you know what I mean? Have you ever felt that you took things for granted because you didn’t know any different?”
It was like she’d read his mind. That was exactly how he was feeling about how things had been with Tiny. He’d appreciated her, but he’d never taken the time to reflect on how truly blessed he’d been to have Tiny’s attention, to have the expectation that they would one day court and marry. “Jah,” he said, his throat tight. “I have felt like that before.” Nee, he should probably be more honest if she was being honest with him. “I mean to say, I’ve been feeling like that today.”
“Ah. Well, it looks like you came to the right place, then.” She waved a hand. “Books are wonderful things, and I’m hopeful that one of them will help you take your mind off your problems. But if you ever need an ear, come by and visit me. We can chat and catch up. Or, I can even just listen.”
Sincerity surrounded her like a wispy cloud, leading him to realize that she meant every word. “Danke,” he said simply.
“You’re quite welcome.”
He finished his coffee, checked out two books at last, and then took his leave. Walking out into the cold again, Joel felt at loose ends. Nothing was going as he’d planned today. Not his visit to see Tiny, not even this walk, as he’d ended up at a bookmobile pouring out his troubles to a retired accountant with a gift for conversation.
It was too cold to simply wander around. The snow was thick, and the sky was filled with the type of low clouds that signaled more snow was on the way. He headed home, lost in thought.
Which was probably why he didn’t notice the stray dog until he was upon it. It was a yellow dog. Perhaps part Labrador, maybe part shepherd. More importantly, though, it was baring its teeth and growling at him.
“Hey, now. Don’t fret, hund. I won’t bother you none.” He held up a hand as if to prove his point.
But unfortunately, that was the wrong thing to do. Obviously thinking that Joel was about to hit it, the dog bared its teeth and growled again.
In reflex, Joel raised his hand. Not to strike but to fend off an attack.
Immediately, the dog whined and cowered.
“Oh, hund,” he murmured. “Easy now.” Taking a closer look, he realized that the poor thing was next to skin and bones. His heart went out to it. “You’ve had a time of it, haven’t ya?” he asked.
The dog gazed at him for a moment, then limped closer. No doubt, one or more of its paws were injured from all the snow and ice on the ground.
The animal was in pain, scared, and in need of care. But how to go about that, Joel wasn’t exactly sure. He’d never had a pet and certainly didn’t have the first idea about how to get an injured animal to trust him. “What should we do about you?” he murmured.
The dog’s brown eyes blinked. It was as if he was just as surprised as Joel about their present situation. Slowly, he sat down on his haunches. Waiting.
Waiting for Joel. All of his doubts shifted, and all of his worries didn’t seem to matter so much anymore. He couldn’t ignore the animal or pretend their paths hadn’t crossed. Perhaps the Lord had brought them together for a reason? It seemed likely.
“Dog, what do you think? Should you go home with me? I haven’t ever had a dog, but I know enough to know you need food, warmth, and care. I’ll do my best for you, if you wouldn’t mind some mistakes now and then.”
The dog scooted three or four inches closer, and its head leaned closer still, almost as if it was waiting for Joel to give more assurances.
And so he did. “Dog, I’m not a violent man. I won’t harm you any. And… I’ll put you on a blanket in my bedroom. You can sleep there. It’s nothing fancy, but it’s a far sight better than out here. Then, too, I can take a look at your paw and give you some food.”
He smiled when the dog scooted several more inches closer and tilted its head to one side, still studying him.
No, still wanting to believe.
In spite of the snow on the ground, Joel crouched down to be at the dog’s height. “If I’m going to take you home to be my dog, we should maybe try to be friends, jah?” He figured the first step was for the poor animal to know he wouldn’t harm him. He held out a hand and waited.
It backed up several inches, but Joel kept his hand outstretched.
Then, ever so slowly, the dog inched forward. “That’s right, hund. You’ve got to trust somebody, ain’t so? It might as well be me.”
A minute later, the dog got to its feet and stepped forward, this time, almost until its black nose reached the tips of Joel’s fingers.
Joel’s knees were starting to complain, but he stayed put. As the dog seemed to continue to weigh the pros and cons of coming closer, Joel realized that he had no doubts about taking the animal home. It didn’t matter if the dog had been abused or abandoned or bit him or didn’t trust him. What mattered was that they needed each other. He knew they did. And he didn’t even care what his parents were going to think. This dog needed a home, and he was going to provide it. He reckoned Tiny would agree with that wholeheartedly.
He had just started imagining what Tiny would look like when she saw this poor dog when he felt its cold, wet, nose resting against his fingertips.
Joel smiled. “Yellow dog, it is gut to meet you. My name’s Joel.” Ever so slowly, he ran a finger along the dog’s head. To his relief, the dog didn’t flinch or run away. It just remained staring at him, waiting to see what their next step would be.
And for the first time
all day, Joel knew exactly what that would be. “Let’s go home, hund. I’d pick you up, but even in your state, I fear it would be too heavy a load to carry for a mile.” He got to his feet and picked the library books back up.
When he started walking, the dog whined. He patted his thigh. “You, too, yellow hund. Come on now.”
After a pause, the dog followed him, remaining three or four steps behind.
“That’s right. Stay with me. I won’t steer you wrong.”
It had been a very strange day, full of surprises. He’d doctored Tiny’s hand, gotten kicked out of her house, had a heart-to-heart with a librarian, and now had adopted a dog. It seemed his grandfather, his dawdi, had been correct all those years ago when he’d declared that one’s life had to be shaken up from time to time.
Or, in the dog’s case, it simply needed a thread of hope.
eighteen
• RULE #18 •
No matter how quiet it is, don’t fall asleep on the job.
“I think you should come over for supper soon,” Aunt Pat announced to Kayla as they were cleaning up the shop at the end of the day. “You’ve got to be mighty lonely in that house without your father. And there’s no telling what you have been eating. Probably nothing good.”
Pat wasn’t wrong. She hadn’t been eating anything that could be classified as “good.” She didn’t have a good excuse for it, either. Though her money situation was tight, she did have enough cash on hand to shop for groceries. She was even a fairly decent cook, decent enough to make five or six basic meals. The problem was that she lacked the will to do it. After months of working all day, tutoring, caring for her father in the evenings, and then doing all her regular chores, she had been running on empty. Now that her father was gone and she had the house to herself, all she wanted to do when she got home was collapse. Therefore, her new diet consisted of popcorn, some canned fruit, and a couple of jars of soup. Not that her aunt needed to know that.
“Danke, but I’ve been doing fine. I have been eating plenty.”
A Perfect Amish Romance Page 11