My Fair Duchess (A Once Upon A Rogue Novel Book 1)

by Julie Johnstone

  “You can’t tell me all this attention doesn’t please you.” He waved a hand toward the riders.

  His voice had taken on a hard edge, yet what sounded like uncertainty made his words rise ever so slightly. Was she starting to get through that thick skull of his? She grinned and his brows came together in a deep, furrowed frown. She leaned near him, so that the nosy ladies behind them would not hear her. The desire to tell him how she felt overwhelmed her. Now, surrounded by so many others, was not the time, though.

  “I am happy because you are here with me.”

  He drew his lips in thoughtfully while he stared at her as if she were a foreign object he had never seen before. Good. Let him question his own beliefs, if that was his process. If she was very lucky it would lead to him questioning his heart and then finally letting her in.

  “The Duke of Scarsdale has won!” one of the women exclaimed. Her muscles went rigid at the thought of having to accept a carriage ride with the man, but there was no good way to decline and still appear gracious. Walking forward and away from the rest of the group, she raised her hand once again to shield her eyes from the glare of the midday sun. The duke rode his horse directly to her. His stallion’s black coat gleamed with slick perspiration as the animal pranced from foot to foot, snorting. She darted a glance behind her, glad to find Colin and her brother walking toward her as the red-haired lady, Jemma, led the rest of the group away.

  “I’ve come to claim my prize,” the Duke of Scarsdale said.

  “My sister is no prize,” Philip retorted.

  Amelia frowned. She knew Philip had meant only to be her protector, but she wished he would select his words with more care.

  The Duke of Scarsdale, with his dark hair slicked severely back from his rugged face and his coal gaze focused on her, did not look as if the race had taken the least bit of effort.

  “Do you never get hot?” She blurted the first thing that came to her mind.

  Sliding off his panting horse, he handed the beast off to his man. who had appeared as if by magic at his side. Turning, the duke smiled slowly at Amelia, showing gleaming teeth. “I assure you, Lady Amelia, the right situation can make me blistering.”

  “Scarsdale,” Colin growled beside her. The muscles of Colin’s jaw tensed visibly.

  The duke chuckled. “I promise to be on my best behavior every moment I am with Lady Amelia.”

  “And her chaperone,” Colin snapped. “She goes nowhere without her.”

  “Of course not,” the duke replied smoothly, and rather oddly, caught Philip’s eye.

  Amelia would have missed it had she blinked.

  Philip glanced quickly away, while clearing his throat. “I must have your promise as a gentleman that you will not abscond with my sister,” Philip said. “I may have known you since our school days, but I also know of your reputation.”

  Surprised that she had never heard Philip mention the Duke of Scarsdale, since they had apparently gone to school together, Amelia glanced at her brother and could have sworn a small smile tugged at his lips. Something very odd was amiss.

  Colin shook his head. “I’m afraid I don’t share your faith in Scarsdale,” Colin growled. “Lady Amelia, I truly don’t think it’s wise for you to go.”

  “You don’t?” Her blood was roaring in her ears with her hope.

  “No, I don’t. In fact, I’m begging you not to.”

  “I’m standing right here,” Scarsdale said evenly. “You gave your word you would ride with the winner, Lady Amelia. But if you are not a woman of your word, so be it, but I vow on my parents’ graves that I will be a perfect gentleman.”

  Blast the man. There was no way she could say no now. Plus, if she backed out, she would look as if she did not keep her word, and she did not want to give Colin the tiniest room to doubt her. “I’ll go, but only,” she said, purposely eyeing Colin, “because I am true to my word.”

  “I want to know what time you will be arriving to take Lady Amelia out and when you plan to return her,” Colin demanded.

  “I’d like to know that, as well,” Philip added.

  Amelia had heard a tremor of laugher in her brother’s voice, but a quick glance around the group showed no signs that anyone else had heard it. She wiped at her hot brow. Maybe the heat was getting to her.

  Scarsdale looked thoughtful for a moment. “Is noon suitable for you, Lady Amelia?”

  Never was preferable, but what was done could not be undone. Well, not gracefully anyway. “That will be acceptable.”

  “Excellent.” Scarsdale grasped her hand, and before she could protest, he raised it, peeling off her glove, and pressed his lips to her skin. He kissed it like a man intent on but one thing―seduction. His dark gaze held hers, dangerous and glittering. She stared into the depths of his cold eyes and searched for a glimmer of goodness, the likes of which always shined from Colin’s beguiling gaze. What she saw―deep unfathomable pain―made her gasp. He blinked and the darkness of his gaze turned frosty, his lashes lowering to veil his soul. Beside her, she could feel the tension radiating from Colin.

  With a chuckle, Scarsdale released her hand, turned on his heel, and was gone the way he had come moments before.

  Philip clapped his hands together, making Amelia jump. “Well, dear sister of mine, it seems you have a new, very eligible suitor. I’d not have originally picked Scarsdale for you, but he seems as if the years have taught him some valuable lessons.”

  Amelia was not mistaken in that Philip pierced Colin with a knowing look. Clearly, Philip knew there was no affection lost between the gentlemen, so why was he goading Colin?

  “You know you should not trust him, Harthorne,” Colin bit out.

  Philip clasped Colin on the shoulder. “Some would say the same of you, Aversley, yet I’ve always trusted you. I do believe Scarsdale has changed.”

  “I doubt it, and I’ll thank you not to put me in the same category as Scarsdale.”

  “In this instance, I cannot help but do so. You are both my sister’s suitors, it seems.”

  “Philip!” Amelia cried, tugging her glove on. What was he trying to do? He’d ruin everything.

  Colin’s eyes narrowed. “I’ll be off now and leave you two to visit.”

  “I’ll see you at the club,” Philip said cheerfully to Colin’s back since he’d already turned to stride away.

  Amelia watched him leave, wanting to call him back but suspecting he would not come. When he was gone, she turned on Philip. “What game are you playing with my life? Colin is nothing like the Duke of Scarsdale.” She twisted her hands together, her stomach twisting, as well. I’ll never forgive you if you’ve driven Colin away from me! I love him!” She sucked in a breath and clasped her hand to her mouth.

  Her brother smiled gently. “I know.”

  Confusion swarmed her as she withdrew her hand and stared at her brother. “You know?”

  He shrugged. “Well, I suspected. And, Amelia, you must trust me. I don’t think I’ve driven him away. I’m trying to make the fool see what is right in front of his face, if he will only reach out and grasp it.”

  “How? How are you trying to do that?” she demanded, her irritation threatening to boil over.

  “Calm down and let me explain,” he said in a soothing voice.

  Amelia took a deep breath. “This is as calm as I’m going to get, Philip. Spit out your plan before I choke it out of you.”

  Philip grinned. “Last night, after the ball, I ran into Scarsdale at White’s.”

  “Why have you never mentioned his name before? How is it I did not know the two of you went to school together?”

  “I suppose the occasion never came up to talk of him to you, and my friendship with him ended quite abruptly when I was much younger.”

  Amelia thought of Lady Langley’s story about Colin’s fight with the duke. Could Philip’s friendship have ended over the same thing? “What ended your friendship?”

  “It’s not my place to reveal it, Amelia. I
swore to Aversley I would take the secret to my grave.”

  She wanted to argue. In fact, she fairly burned to argue and learn what had happened, but she knew her brother, and if he had given his word, he would never go back on it. And that was what made her love him so. Reluctantly, she nodded. “Go on.”

  “I’ve watched Scarsdale try time and again to make amends with Aversley over the years. Some of Scarsdale’s methods were badly chosen, but I believe the man was and is desperate. I believe he truly regrets the mistake he made and genuinely wants to somehow repair a bit of the pain he caused Aversley so long ago. Scarsdale was young and foolish when he did what he did, and normally, Aversley would see it, but it involved someone who had already hurt Aversley a great deal.”

  “Does this have anything to do with that lady the Duke of Scarsdale ran off to Gretna Green with?”

  Philip frowned. “No. Are you listening to me?”

  She glared in return. “No. I’m standing here not hearing a word you’ve said.” She plunked her hands on her hips. “This is rather hard to follow, Philip.”

  “Sorry. No, the end of their friendship had nothing to do with the lady Scarsdale ran off with to Gretna Green. Their friendship ended much earlier. The Gretna Green incident was when we were one and twenty, and I do believe, in Scarsdale’s defense, he thought only to get Aversley to talk to him and then ended up besotted with the lady in question.”

  “He told you that?”

  “No and yes. Not in those exact words.”

  Amelia sighed. “What has the Duke of Scarsdale told you?”

  “Last night, Scarsdale asked me if I could give him another chance, and I said I could after he confessed that what he did so many years ago gnaws at him constantly and that he would do anything to set things right between him and Aversley, but he could not think what he could possibly do.”

  Philip grinned. “Luckily, I could, and it had to do with you. So I told Scarsdale about the wager I made with Aversley right down to what was at stake, Aversley’s opinions of women, and how I thought Scarsdale could help me, and in turn, you. But most importantly could help Aversley.”

  “Colin would not like that,” Amelia said. She didn’t particularly like the Duke of Scarsdale knowing about the wager, but what was done, was done and there was no undoing it now.

  “No Aversley wouldn’t like it one bit, but he’ll like the regrets he has to live with if he foolishly loses you even less.”

  “You are a wonderful bother, Philip.” Amelia hugged him. She would have picked a different way for him to show his love, but she was so thankful to have a brother that cared for her as much as Philip did.

  “Aversley just needs a little push, Amelia. He’s afraid. But in my experience there’s nothing better to cure a man of what he fears than a bigger fear. He fears his feelings for you, but I know he fears losing you more. Scarsdale is the push. Last night, we came up with the plan for Scarsdale to appear to be courting you in earnest, and my part is to seemingly agree with it. I’m not normally one for deception, but in this case, since there is no possible way Aversley will be damaged, I think a bit of trickery is acceptable. If you are sure you love Aversley and won’t prove him right by throwing him over for Scarsdale.”

  “I’d never do such a thing. I love Colin,” she said, even as the words filled her with hope and fear.

  White’s was basically empty, which suited Colin perfectly. He was in no mood to make polite conversation, and the only reason he was here now and not in the comfort of his own study was because he had a thing or two he wanted to say to Harthorne. Like why the bloody hell would he think he could trust Scarsdale.

  The duke’s name brought Colin’s other problem to his mind. After he’d left the picnic today, he’d tried and failed to see his mother. Her butler had said she was at the orphanage. Apparently, his mother now had a great desire to help others. He’d struggled all day to reconcile the image of his mother at an orphanage with the picture in his head of the cool, uncaring woman he had assumed had no capacity to love.

  The more he thought about her, the more he realized with a gut-sinking sensation that his demeanor was quite like his mother’s―an aloof, devil-may-care attitude. But things had once greatly affected him and hurt him. Had it been the same for his mother? Had he been so hurt by her that he refused to see the possibility that maybe she was masking pain? A twisted way to do it, but nonetheless who was he to judge?

  Colin lifted his glass and took the final swig of his drink. The aromas of the barrel-aged whiskey filled his nose, and the liquor burned a path to his belly. He set his crystal tumbler down and raised his hand to indicate he wanted another dram. Within seconds, golden liquor shimmered before him once more. Harthorne would be here any second, and Colin could not figure out exactly what to say.

  Why couldn’t he think clearly? He wanted to demand Harthorne refuse to allow Amelia to go riding with Scarsdale, but he could not force the man to do anything in regard to his own sister. With a frustrated growl, Colin swigged the entire contents of his glass and narrowed his eyes while focusing his thoughts.

  His only chance of keeping Amelia away from Scarsdale was for Colin to offer her his heart, assuming she wanted it. Devil take it, he was making excuses and he knew it. Colin took a long, ragged breath. If his mother of all people could change, he bloody well could, too. He had to face his fear, because…because―his heart exploded as he gripped his glass―he loved Amelia. He loved her. He did.

  “Damnation,” he swore under his breath. All this time, struggling not to end up a lovelorn fool like his father and Amelia had already twined him around her finger without him realizing it. His hands shook. Could he offer his heart to her? Would she want it once he told her of his past, which instinctually he felt he had to do if he meant to truly change? He needed to tell her everything, including the stipulation in his father’s will. The thought made his hand shake as he raised his whiskey glass to his lips, realizing, as he titled the glass and nothing game out, it was still empty. He grimaced at his distraction. This would not do. He needed to think carefully on how he would word telling her about the will and pick the exact right time to do it. He didn’t want her to ever doubt he was asking her to marry him out of love.

  He swallowed as a hand clamped on his shoulder.

  Harthorne sat down beside him. “Sorry I’m late.”

  Colin blinked. “Are you late?”

  Harthorne gave him a strange look. “Yes. Almost an hour. Did you not notice?”

  “No. I’ve been preoccupied.”

  “Me as well,” Harthorne said and motioned to the staff to bring him a drink.

  Colin struggled to pull his thoughts away from his past and his mother and concentrate on Harthorne. “What detained you?”

  “Lord Shrewsbury. He appeared at my room and requested permission to ask for Amelia’s hand.”

  “What?” Colin growled.

  “Sit down, Aversley.”

  Colin blinked, unaware he had jumped up. He slowly sat again. “Did you tell Shrewsbury to bugger off?”

  “Certainly not. I gave the nice chap permission, and then I had no choice but to go with him to your aunt’s house so he could ask Amelia to marry him.”

  Colin’s mouth felt too dry to speak. He reached for his glass to take a drink, remembered once again, he had finished his, and swiped up Harthorne’s untouched liquor. After several swigs, he set the tumbler down. His head knew Amelia would not accept the offer, but his heart reacted peculiarly anyway. “She declined the offer, I assume?”

  “Of course,” Harthorne said with a wave of his hand. “I knew she would, tried to convince the chap of as much, but he refused to listen, so I had to let him hear it from her lips.”

  Colin released a breath he had not realized he held and met Harthorne’s gaze. “Amelia is not going to change.”

  Harthorne smiled, his eyes sympathetic. “No, she is not. The question is, are you?”

  “I am going to try,” Colin said, making
up his mind to go see his mother again tonight. He didn’t give a damn how late it was. His gut told him he’d have a better chance of understanding himself if he could simply understand her

  .

  Not thirty minutes later, Colin stomped away from the steps of his mother’s home on Mayfair and lumbered into his carriage. “Take me home, Barnes.”

  “The duchess isn’t in, Your Grace?”

  Colin laid his head back and closed his eyes. “According to her butler, she and another group of women who call themselves the Angels of the Orphans decided to spend the night at the orphanage. They suspect the children are being mistreated, and they don’t think the ladies currently on the orphanage committee are doing enough about it.”

  “Your mother? Spending the night at an orphanage?”

  “I know,” Colin said. “I find it hard to believe myself.” Not only that she was so passionate about the orphans, or anyone at all, but that she was willing to spend the night somewhere like that. God alone only knew whom she coerced into letting her and her friends stay there.

  He’d come by again in the morning, but if she still wasn’t home, he would go speak to Amelia. He didn’t want her to go off with Scarsdale before he had a chance to talk to her.

  Colin awoke the next morning, and after stopping by his mother’s and learning she had come home but had gone out again to somewhere the butler wasn’t privy to, Colin headed to his aunt’s home. He expected that both Aunt Jane and Amelia might still be asleep, but he would simply sit and wait until Amelia made an appearance downstairs.

  He knocked on the door, and when the butler opened it wide, Colin caught a glimpse of Amelia on the far side of the entrance, slipping out the terrace door that led to the gardens. “I’m here to see Lady Amelia,” Colin announced and brushed past the butler, not waiting to actually be let in. “No need to announce me,” Colin called over his shoulder. “I saw her heading to the gardens. I’ll just go catch up with her.”

  Colin was across the parquet floor and descending the steps into the garden before the butler likely ever took a full breath. He stopped near the water fountain and glanced around the grounds but did not see Amelia anywhere. That was odd. She had come this way. “Amelia!”