Not That Kind of Girl

by Susan Donovan

  Gloria smiled to herself. And what about this match, the one blossoming right here under the window of her hospital room?

  She took a deep, satisfying breath.

  This one was a piece of cake. A real no-brainer, as Bea would say.

  * * *

  Eli kissed her silky-soft forehead, kicked off his shoes, and made his way to Roxie’s queen-sized platform bed. He stretched out on the cream-colored comforter, laced his fingers behind his head, and crossed his ankles. Eli wiggled his toes and sighed in relaxation.

  Lilith went nuts.

  “I thought she was doing better,” Roxie said, coming near the bed, frowning in disappointment.

  “Oh, she is.” Eli grinned and patted the top of the comforter, urging her to join him. “But in a dog’s mind, this is the Holy Grail of dominance. The food bowl is bad enough, but the bed is where dominant dogs draw the line.”

  Roxie cracked her neck. “Great.”

  Eli laughed. “So, do you sleep alone?”

  Roxie’s eyes went huge. He watched the anger flare on her face. Clearly, her first instinct had been to lash out at his presumptuous question. She was just like Lilith—falling back on what was familiar though she knew it would only bring more misery. Eli wondered if Roxie had figured out what he was up to yet—that he was chipping away at her old patterns right along with her dog’s?

  “What exactly—”

  “I’m asking whether Lilith sleeps with you at night.”

  “Oh.” Roxie let out the breath she’d been holding. “Sometimes,” she said. Then she cautiously lowered her perfect little bottom onto the edge of the bed, keeping her feet on the floor.

  The instant Roxanne’s butt hit the mattress, Lilith doubled the decibel level of her incessant barking. The dog was up on all fours, teeth bared once more. Eli did not look at Lilith and did not raise his voice when he spoke to Roxie.

  “Who decides when she sleeps with you? Is that your decision, or hers?”

  Roxie looked down at her dog, then snapped her head back to Eli. “Sorry. I forgot,” she said.

  “No problem.”

  “I guess Lilith decides,” she answered, fighting to keep her voice calm in the mayhem. He had to hand it to her—she was really trying. “Some nights she wants up and some nights she sleeps on the floor next to the bed.”

  “So once she’s up here, would she get down if you told her to?”

  Roxie laughed a little. Once more, Eli was mesmerized by how pretty she was when she laughed.

  “I tried that once. It didn’t work out so great.”

  He nodded. It was what he had expected to hear.

  “She wouldn’t budge. She even growled at me.”

  Roxie had never mentioned that before. “What did you do?”

  She flipped her hair over her shoulder and sighed. “I let it go. I didn’t press the issue. But that was right after I got her, so I figured she was, you know, still getting settled in.”

  “Hmm,” Eli said, knowing it was time to read her questionnaire. “Can you go get the forms I asked you to fill out, and then come up here on the bed with me? We’ll read them together.”

  Roxie’s mouth pulled tight, but she nodded, leaving the bedroom. He heard her feet run down the steps, then come right back up. Lilith didn’t move or change the cadence of her barking. Eli didn’t acknowledge her.

  Roxie was soon back, and Eli observed her as she walked to the other side of the bed and climbed up next to him. She lay down quite close. His instinct was to wrap his arms around her, but he knew he was going to need them for other things. Immediately.

  Lilith jumped up on the bed and put her paws on Eli’s chest, assuming the top-dog stance as she barked and growled in his face. Slowly, without a trace of emotion or fear, Eli rose up and pressed his fingertips into the side of her neck. “Shh!” he said, gently grabbing her collar and guiding her to the floor.

  As if nothing had happened, he returned to his spot on the bed with Roxanne. They started to review the questionnaire but Lilith continued to bark and growl. After about five minutes of that, Lilith jumped on the bed again. Eli repeated the routine. Then again. Then once more.

  Eli thought Lilith would try for a fifth time—which would have been a record in his many years of this exercise—but she stopped in mid-jump. Lilith dropped her paws from the side of the bed and decided it wasn’t worth it. After spinning in place a few times to find that perfect spot, she collapsed on the floor with a loud thump and a sigh.

  Eli and Roxie lay in silence, waiting until they could be sure the dog wasn’t launching another attack. “My God, what a nightmare,” Roxie whispered into Eli’s ear. “I think you actually broke a sweat.” She touched her fingers to his damp temple and then ran her fingers through his hair. “Now what do we do?”

  He turned to her. Her face was so close to his that he could smell her sweet breath and a light floral scent floating from her skin and hair. Eli breathed deeply, pulling the warm flowers inside himself.

  He wanted to do the same with all of her—body and soul—just grab Roxanne Bloom and pull her to him. But he knew that slow and steady would be the only way with Roxie.

  “How about we chill for a while and review the questionnaire?” Eli answered her.

  “What about Lilith?”

  “What about her?” Eli said, smiling. “Take a peek.”

  Roxie rose up and leaned over Eli’s body so she could see down to the floor. When she did that, those gorgeous breasts of hers pressed into his belly. Her right hip pushed up against his left one.

  “Her eyes are closed,” Roxie whispered, her voice full of wonder. “That’s absolutely amazing.”

  Eli’s eyes were closed, too, as he focused all his senses on each point of contact between their bodies. Breast to belly. Hip to hip. The way Roxanne’s hair fell loose and brushed across his lips.

  Absolutely amazing was right.

  Chapter 9

  They made it through the client survey, but, because Roxie had a question for every question, the process had taken nearly an hour.

  Why did Eli need to know such intimate details about her personal life? she’d asked him. Why did she have to tell him how she spent her typical workday? Or why she occasionally had trouble sleeping? Or whether she fretted over her finances? Or what she did for relaxation?

  Eli laughed out loud at what Roxie had written down for that one. “The only thing I do for relaxation is take Lilith on her walks, which is anything but relaxing, so I guess it would be accurate to say I never relax.”

  “Ah, Roxie,” Eli had said, pulling her tighter to his side. “We’re going to have to work on that.”

  “I do run,” she added, raising her head from his shoulder, looking and sounding pleased with herself.

  “Really? That’s great.” Eli scribbled that information along the questionnaire’s margin.

  “But I only do it to stay in shape,” she admitted. “I don’t really like it much. I hate it, actually. But I love keeping a running journal so I can see how I’ve pushed myself to go harder and farther. It’s kind of a competition with myself.”

  “Right,” Eli said, crossing out his margin notes as he shook his head. “Out of curiosity, who usually wins that competition?”

  Roxie squinted her eyes at him. “Is this a trick question? Another way to judge me, show me how uptight I am?”

  “This is not about judging you, Roxie.” Eli reached down and tweaked her delicate chin. “I’m just trying to figure out what makes you tick, and how your personality and lifestyle might be linked to Lilith’s difficulties.”

  “Why do you keep touching my face?” she asked.

  He chuckled. “Because it’s a beautiful face. Very soft and sweet, and I’m blown away when you smile.”

  “Really?”

  “You have a great laugh, too.”

  “I do?”

  “I hope I get to experience a lot more of both.”

  She nodded. “Are we almost done?” she as
ked, dropping her gaze to the papers in Eli’s lap.

  He laughed, knowing the answer to that question would be a resounding no. They were just getting started. But Eli knew she’d meant the client questionnaire, not the dual journeys they’d begun together. “The only section that’s left has to do with your love life, but you left it blank. Did you run out of time?”

  Roxie popped up to a sitting position on the bed. Lilith raised her sleepy head to check that everything was all right, then tucked her snout between her paws and went right back to sleep.

  “No,” she said, pulling up her knees and hugging them close to her chest. “And I’m not avoiding the subject, either. I just didn’t think there was enough room on your little form to say what needed to be said.”

  Eli nodded neutrally. “Care to elaborate?”

  Roxie laughed, pulling her knees right up under her chin and lowering her head. She reminded him of those strange little pill bugs he often saw on the ranch, creatures that could roll themselves up into a perfect armor-encased ball when threatened.

  He sure didn’t want to threaten her. “It’s okay, Roxie. We have plenty of time. We can get to it whenever you feel comfortable.”

  She raised her face then, and he was struck by how young she looked. Her eyes were big and black and her pretty mouth was pulled tight.

  “It’s my fault things were so rough when you first got here today,” she said. “My ex-boyfriend called right as you knocked on the door. He starting talking shit to me, threatening me, telling me I was nothing. I screamed at him. Then I threw the phone into the corner. Then I answered the door, already in full flipping-out mode.”

  Eli nodded, saying nothing.

  “I did everything wrong,” she said.

  “It was bad timing. I appreciate how hard you tried.” He wanted to touch her again, but the way she was curled up was a clear warning to stay away. “Want to tell me about him?”

  “Uh,” Roxie looked around her bedroom. She sighed. “Maybe a little, okay?”

  “As much or as little as you want.”

  She nodded at him, then gave him a fully unexpected smile. “You’re very good at this,” she said.

  He wasn’t sure what she meant by that.

  “You know, with dogs and with people. You’re real gentle about it, but you don’t mess around—you get right to the heart of things.”

  “Thanks—I think,” he said with a laugh. Eli felt that old familiar stab of guilt in his gut—if his fierce attraction to Roxie was any indication, he’d have a hell of a time with the gentle part of the equation. And then what would she do? Would it be a repeat of Tamara? Of college?

  She studied Eli for just a moment, her face becoming serious. “You look worried, but he never hurt me physically, if that’s what you’re thinking. Well, not until he knocked the door into my head.” She gave a quick rub to her scalp and sighed before she continued. “He was almost thirty years older than me, a very handsome and powerful lawyer I met while covering a big murder trial.”

  Eli nodded, glad she’d misinterpreted his worry.

  “He’s a high-profile defense attorney. A legend in this city, really. He hardly ever loses a case.”

  “I see,” Eli said, not indicating he’d already heard part of this from Teeny and Rick.

  “I got totally sucked in. I was hypnotized by how brilliant he was and how sophisticated he seemed and all the important people he knew. He took me to A-list parties and the best restaurants and got front-row seats to everything. I know now it was all an illusion, but he made me feel safe. I thought he adored me.” At that point, Roxie’s eyes met his, and they were swimming with tears. “The girls—Bea, Ginger, and Josie—they warned me. They told me he was too old for me and he couldn’t be trusted and that I’d let my father-figure complex get in the way, but I told them they were wrong, that this was the real deal.”

  Eli smiled sadly. “We can all get carried away sometimes. The combination of physical attraction and wishful thinking can be particularly deadly.”

  Roxie bit her lip. “You’re damn right about that. The physical thing was very, uh, you know …”

  “I can guess,” Eli assured her.

  “Look, I knew at the time that he could be an asshole. I saw how he was with people he didn’t like or who he couldn’t use to his advantage. But there was something about him that hooked me and reeled me in.”

  She looked away uncomfortably. “I was downright high on wishful thinking, you know? I just wanted it so badly. I wanted him so badly. I wanted to be loved and be a part of something special.” She swiped at a single tear that had managed to drop to her cheek.

  “So what happened?” Eli wanted to hear it from her.

  She shrugged. “Josie and I had this great idea to pop in on him while he was out with his cronies. We walked into the cigar club where he hangs out, and strolled up to his table while he was talking—about me.” She closed her eyes. “He was telling his friends about how he prefers his women young and stupid. He called me a ‘pack mule,’ saying he loved the way he could just keep piling the bullshit on me and I’d keep coming back for more. Then he said … he said—”

  “You don’t have to tell me if you don’t want, Roxanne.” Eli reached out then, and placed his hand on her knee. “You can stop whenever you want to.”

  She shrugged, then plowed ahead. “He said, ‘that girl I’m with now, that reporter chick, if she could give a decent blow job she’d be perfect.’ ”

  Roxanne’s eyes shot toward Eli, as if challenging him to come up with a gentle yet pithy response to that. No way was he even going to try. He stayed silent.

  She continued. “So I reached over his shoulder and grabbed his cigar—which was lit, by the way—and started grinding it into the big-ass bald spot on his head.”

  Eli shivered, remembering Rick’s claim that the whole place smelled like burning flesh.

  “That’s when I started the Web site,” she said, perking up dramatically. “I started it because I needed to vent. I needed to tell the world about my experience. At first, I was sure I was the only woman who’d ever been through something so horrible—but guess what? I’m not! Women like me are everywhere!” Roxie’s arms flew up over her head. Lilith popped up from her sleep and rested her snout on the edge of the bed, keeping a wary eye on her mistress.

  Roxie noticed, and stopped herself in mid-rant. She took a deep, ragged breath and reached out to pat her dog calmly. “It’s okay, Lily Girl,” she reassured her. The dog sat on her haunches, tail wagging.

  “Anyway,” Roxie continued. “Women started writing in from all over. Their stories blew me away. I posted them. And the thing just grew and grew.” Roxanne swiveled her head back and forth, cracking her neck.

  Eli leaned back against the pillows of Roxie’s bed, thinking that this girl needed a masseuse as much as she needed a dog whisperer. He smiled to himself. Lucky for her, he was skilled at both.

  “Can I ask you something?” he asked her.

  “Of course.”

  “All this venting on the Web site. Your Jerk-of-the-Week award. All the blogging you do about your horrible ex-boyfriend. Has any of it helped?”

  Roxie looked puzzled. “You know about my Jerk-of-the-Week contest?”

  Eli grinned. “I have a computer, too, Ms. Bloom.”

  She laughed.

  “So?” he asked again. “Has it helped?”

  “Helped what?”

  “You,” Eli said, sitting up straighter. “Has it helped you to heal? Has it helped you feel happier? Brought you any peace?”

  She choked in surprise. Her lips parted and she stared at him. “Hell yes, it has,” she said, as if he’d missed the point entirely. “I’ve got steady income. I have a reason to get up in the morning. I have something to be passionate about.”

  Eli smiled.

  “What?” she asked. “Why are you looking at me like that?”

  He reached out for one of her hands and waited until she slipped it into his
palm. He held it softly. “I wondered if it might be the opposite.”

  She frowned.

  “Have you ever considered that being the ambassador of angry women might make things worse for you on a personal level?”

  “It makes things better,” she said with a crisp nod of her head. “I should know.”

  Eli let that settle for a moment, and he had an idea. “Out of curiosity, have you taken a break since you started your Web site, just stepped back for a few days?”

  “I couldn’t possibly.”

  “You could leave a message saying the site is down for a week while you’re on vacation.”

  “No.”

  “Everyone takes vacations.”

  “I don’t.”

  Eli realized that a grin had begun to spread across his face. His gaze wandered to Lilith and then back to Roxie. “Would you consider it?”

  Both her eyebrows were raised now.

  “Would you consider taking a road trip? You, me, and Lilith?”

  Roxanne blinked. “Are you serious?”

  “Yes.”

  “But …” Roxie laughed. It was a real laugh, deep and loose. “You only just met me! We don’t even know each other. That would be totally nuts!”

  He chuckled. Yes, it would be. Eli held up the questionnaire. “I know a whole lot about you, Roxie Bloom,” he reminded her. “And by the time we got back, you’d know everything there was to know about me. We’d be even.”

  She lowered her chin, leveling her gaze on him. “Where did you have in mind?”

  “Ever been to Panguitch, Utah?”

  “What the hell is that and why would I want to go there?”

  Eli laughed. “It’s my home. My ranch.”

  Her lips parted.

  “I’ve got one thing I need to take care of in town tomorrow—plus I’ll need to swing by the doctor’s and get stitched up, but then I’m free. How does early Friday morning sound? We’ll be at the ranch by suppertime.”

  She stared at him blankly.

  “C’mon!” he said. “When’s the last time you went on a road trip? A wind-in-your-hair, music-blaring kind of road trip?”

  “It’s been a while,” she said.