The Cinderella Substitute

by Nell Dixon

  He looked as tired as she felt. Dark circles had formed under his eyes. Stubble showed in a faint shadow along the line of his jaw.

  "I'll take you home. I've had enough for today." He switched off his computer and stood up to pull his jacket from the back of his chair.

  Even with her higher heeled shoes, he still loomed over her, a fact she had half registered earlier in the day when she had cannoned into him in the doorway. He locked the design cabinet, then switched off his office light.

  She trailed along the corridor behind him to the lift. The doors chimed open as they reached the deserted lobby. The onyx reception desk stood empty. Lorna had gone home much earlier. Only the uniformed security guard remained in the building to make his routine nighttime patrol.

  "I can catch the bus, Nate. It would save you from going out of your way."

  He checked the messages in the IN tray. "No, I'll take you. It's dark and freezing out there." He paused in his paper shuffling. "There's something here for you, Jen."

  She accepted the slip of paper from him and started to read before she registered why the rounded, childlike scrawl appeared familiar.

  Her mother's words leapt up at her from the cheap lined paper.

  "Sorry I couldn't get away to meet you. I'll be in touch when things are better."

  The signature said Tracey, her birth mother's first name. The letters swam in front of Jenni's eyes. Her knees had all the strength of marshmallows. A strong arm encircled her waist as Nate steered her into Lorna's chair.

  The guard's footsteps rang muzzily in her ears. She heard him confer in an urgent tone with Nate. The buzzing noises receded as she came back to reality. Nate squatted on his haunches at her feet.

  "I'm sorry. I don't know what happened." She never fainted. What had been happening to her lately?

  "I thought you were going to pass right out. You went as white as a ghost." He looked concerned.

  "I'm fine, honestly."

  His nearness made her nervous. The faint masculine scent of his cologne tugged at her senses. She stood up, her knees still weak. "It seems to be my day for making a fool of myself."

  "I'll drive you home." He placed his arm around her waist once more, causing her to give an instinctive jerk at the intimacy of the gesture.

  * * * *

  Nate's heart raced as he supported Jenni on the walk across the car park. He could feel the soft, yielding warmth of her body as he steadied her. It had been a long time since he had held a woman so closely. Too long. Jenni's femininity and her closeness stirred deep-seated emotions he had never expected to feel again.

  He relinquished his support with relief when they reached the car. Her proximity disturbed him in ways he didn't want to admit. She accepted his help to climb in with a murmur of thanks.

  "How do you feel now?"

  She looked at him. "I'm okay, just feeling rather foolish. I've never fainted before in my life."

  "It was a bit of a shock. I asked the security guard if he knew who'd left the note, but he hadn't seen anyone."

  She seemed to be digesting the information. "If Lorna had been there, she would have contacted me straight away, so it must have been after she finished work."

  He grunted an assent. It sounded logical.

  Jenni must have spoken to Lorna about the weekend's events. He wondered how much she had told her, not that anything needed to be hidden.

  There had been enough rumours after the accident, along with numerous well-meaning women who had all appeared to be convinced he needed a shoulder on which to cry. Well, he hadn't. Nate didn't subscribe to the idea that talking about things made them any better. He'd discharged himself from the hospital as soon as possible after the accident and had refused to see the bereavement counsellor.

  He glanced across at Jenni. Behind those awful glasses she wore, her tired eyes looked sad. He hated the thought of dropping her off at her tiny flat and leaving her on her own.

  He pulled the car to a halt in the lay-by opposite her home. The takeaway appeared to be doing good business amongst the teenagers.

  "Thank you for the lift." She paused as if trying to come to a decision. "You're welcome to come in and have some supper with me, if you like."

  Her suggestion took him by surprise. He'd had the feeling the other day that she hadn't been comfortable with inviting him in. She had appeared awkward and diffident, very different from the young woman he thought he knew.

  * * * *

  Second thoughts occurred to Jenni even before she opened the front door and snapped on the light. Nate sank into her armchair, weariness stamped all over his frame. A little pain pierced her heart as she looked at him. She clamped down hard on the feeling. Nate was her friend and her boss. Nothing more.

  She escaped into the kitchen to prepare the supper before she could betray herself. Nate switched on the television and she heard the noise of some motoring program.

  Her cupboards were pretty empty as she hadn't had chance to go shopping for a few days. She examined the contents of her fridge and popped her head around the door to ask if he liked omelettes, only to find he'd dozed off.

  He appeared so vulnerable, sprawled in her tatty throw-covered armchair. His long legs stretched out in front of him and the stubble on his chin showed dark against the faint olive of his skin. She stood for a moment, just watching, and then feeling as if she had done something illicit, turned back to her cooking.

  Fifteen minutes later, she had two fluffy ham and cheese omelettes and salad ready on trays. She wished she'd had something more original to offer him, but at least the food smelt good. Nate remained asleep in the armchair. She wondered how to wake him.

  "Nate."

  He didn't stir, so she placed a tentative hand on his arm and shook him.

  "Supper's ready."

  He groaned and pulled himself straight while he rubbed his eyes. "Sorry, Jenni. I'm not very good company tonight." She passed him a tray. He sniffed the food with appreciation. "Smells great."

  Nate ate his dinner like a starving man. Soon both their plates were empty. It felt nice to have company in her flat. Most evenings she was there on her own. He refused another cup of tea, and sounded reluctant as he pulled on his jacket before announcing he had to go.

  Jenni followed him down the narrow stairs so she could slip the chain across on the door after he'd gone. He stepped outside onto the pavement.

  "Don't stay down here, Jenni. It's too cold." His dark blue eyes locked with hers. She tried to read his thoughts. Without any warning, his head dipped and his lips brushed against hers in a sweet but all-too-brief caress before he went leaving her cold and alone in the hallway.

  Chapter Four

  Jenni watched Nate leave before she closed her door and trudged back up the dingy stairs to her flat. What a day! One minute Nate had been as grouchy as a bear with a sore head and the next moment he’d kissed her.

  The downside soon followed the high of his kiss. Nate was still her boss. He didn't see her in any kind of romantic light. He still grieved for the beautiful fiancée he had lost under such awful circumstances two years earlier. To fall for Nate would be a bad idea. A very bad idea.

  She peeled off her clothes and promised herself a few days away from work as soon as things quietened down in the office. She hadn't taken any holiday for months. It would be nice to have the time to do some more painting. Art restored her spirits and a little restoration sounded good about now.

  She clicked off the bedside light after she hopped into bed. Christmas presented a whole other bundle of problems. Like what to do with herself whilst everyone else spent time with their loved ones. Last year, she'd spent the festive season alone in her flat with the television for company and a frozen chicken dinner for one. She closed her eyes and snuggled down under the duvet with a hollow feeling in her heart.

  * * * *

  The following week passed by in a blur of late hours. Nate retreated back into boss mode. Apart from the nights when he insisted on g
iving her a lift home, they never seemed to be alone together.

  When her phone rang on Friday afternoon, Jenni had the start of a tension headache.

  "Are you all set for tomorrow then?" Lorna chirped.

  She had finally relented to Lorna's nagging about going shopping for new clothes and make-up, but Jenni already had second thoughts about it. She hadn't spent much money on herself for what seemed like forever.

  "If I must," she said, only half joking. The idea of change excited her, but Lorna's enthusiasm for the project was overwhelming.

  "Don't tell me you're feeling chicken? Listen, pop down later and see me if you get a chance. I'll show you what I've arranged. It's going to be great."

  Jenni hung up and crossed the office, ready to feed the invitations for the Christmas dance into the photocopier. She stood and waited for it to churn out the copies. She had never been to the dance before. The first year she had worked for Nate, her mother had been too ill for Jenni to feel comfortable about leaving her. Last year, it had been too soon after her death. Jenni hadn't felt like celebrating.

  Nate had already made it clear he expected her to go this year. She had done all the planning for it, organized the decorations, the band and even the presents. Maybe she should use the opportunity to show off a new look.

  The light on the copier started to blink and Jenni ducked down to reload the paper tray. She straightened back up to restart the copies, only to find herself face-to-face with Mike Walker. He picked up one of the party invitations. "Christmas dance?" he read out loud from the leaflet, oblivious to Jenni's burning cheeks.

  "Yes, it's at the Langstone Club this year." She scooped up the copies.

  A strong, sickly aroma of cheap aftershave assailed her nostrils as he moved a little closer to her.

  "It's that new hotel-cum-country club on the outskirts. It's supposed to be very exclusive." Jenni explained.

  Mike handed her back the leaflet. She noticed his round, pleasant face looked rather flushed. "I wonder if you would like to, erm, that is... I... if you wanted to go with me to the dance?"

  "I'm afraid that won't be possible." Nate's voice cut in.

  Mike turned even redder. Beads of perspiration appeared under the fringe of his fair hair.

  "Jenni is accompanying me and acting as my hostess for the evening, so I'm afraid she'll be rather busy." Nate's diamond gaze and confident tone quelled any possible argument.

  Jenni watched impotently as her would-be suitor muttered an apologetic excuse and bolted down the corridor back to the safety of the Accounts Department.

  "How dare you! That was a private conversation!" She wanted to strangle him, as he stood there looking smug whilst her first chance of a date in over a year evaporated in front of her eyes.

  "Jenni, I did warn you that we were too busy right now for you to be expanding your social life." He appeared unperturbed.

  "It would have been nice if you had told me beforehand that you expected me to act as hostess. Or even, heaven forbid, you might have considered actually asking me. The way you came crashing in just then, Mike might get quite the wrong idea about us. I mean, me."

  He stared at her in amazement. "Jenni, I don't think that's going to happen, do you? You're my P.A. You know everyone in the company and you've organized the whole event. Who better to hostess it with me?" On that reasonable-sounding note he disappeared back into his office.

  * * * *

  Once inside the safety of his office, Nate wondered what had possessed him to intervene when Mike Walker had asked Jenni out. It was none of his business. Jenni had a right to be angry.

  Walker wouldn't get the wrong idea about Nate's relationship with Jenni. Would he? Unless Jenni herself had ideas about their friendship... He rubbed his chin as he paced up and down in front of the desk deep in thought.

  Surely she wouldn't, she had always seemed much too sensible. He'd never thought of Jenni as a frivolous kind of girl. She never fussed about her appearance the way some women did. Like Cerys had. Cerys' voice rang in his memory, "Appearances count, darling. I know you laugh but if you want to get anywhere in life then you must dress for success."

  He paused in his pacing. Cerys had dressed for success. Her clothes had all been designer labels, her nails had always been manicured and her hairdresser had been on permanent standby. She had masked her insecurities with an armour of perfection so refined he hadn't noticed the price she had been prepared to pay until it was too late.

  He bit down hard on that train of thought. Jenni was not Cerys. No, Jenni knew where she stood, didn't she? A momentary feeling of disquiet flitted through his mind. Jenni had started to change her appearance in the last couple of weeks. Higher heels, more fitted clothes. No wonder Walker kept hanging about her like a lovesick puppy. Jenni was a very attractive girl. The kind of girl he could be attracted to.

  He scowled at the view from his window and wished the young accounts manager a million miles away from Mayer holdings and Jenni Blake.

  * * * *

  "It looks great, Jen. Really it does." Lorna assured her.

  Jenni squinted at her hair in the mirror. Nate's colossal insensitivity had made her brave. He'd made it very clear that he didn't find her at all attractive. That there was no way anyone would think he could ever be interested in her romantically. Well, come Monday morning, Nathanial Mayer would see another side to Jenni Blake.

  It had been Lorna's idea to go to the beauty college open day. So far they had both had manicures, massages and pedicures—all for a token sum of money. Now she had a new hairstyle and autumn tints in her hair.

  Lorna pulled the plastic cape from Jenni's shoulders "Anyway, come on. We've got a facial and make-up demo next. After lunch, we're going shopping. The first stop is at the opticians."

  Jenni wished her bravado hadn't led her quite this far. Her naturally cautious nature rebelled a little at the idea of spending so much time and money on herself, even if it was fun. She thanked the hairdresser and followed Lorna into the next department.

  By the end of a very long day it came as a blissful relief to open the door of her flat and stagger inside. Her arms ached with the weight of the bags she carried. Her new contact lenses made her blink like an owl.

  She hung up her new clothes and kicked off her shoes. A long, hot bath called to her to soak her weary limbs. Armed with a glass of the cheap white wine she kept in the fridge, she lay amongst the bubbles and tried to ignore the cracked tile on the opposite wall. At long last, aching muscles relaxed. She hadn't realized looking beautiful was so high maintenance.

  She lazed among the suds until the water cooled. After towelling herself dry she pulled on her old fleecy grey dressing gown, tied the cord around her narrow waist and headed into the kitchen to fix herself a sandwich.

  The doorbell rang as she buttered the bread. Quite often the gang of teenagers who loitered outside the takeaway amused themselves by ringing her bell. This caused her to hesitate as she wondered if she should ignore it or take a peek to see if she really had a caller.

  The doorbell sounded again. Jenni put the knife down and walked across the lounge to lift the curtain to peep out through the window. A familiar figure in a black leather jacket stood in the rain outside her front door. Astonished, she almost let the curtain drop back into place when Nate looked up and noticed her.

  Flustered, Jenni looked at her ratty old dressing gown. There wasn't time to change. He would be soaked if he stayed out there in the wet for much longer. She hurried down the stairs to let him in, grateful the thick material covered her body so well.

  When Jenni opened the front door, Nate stepped inside so quickly she found herself trapped at the foot of the stairs with him. In the tiny confines of the dark hallway, she could almost feel the warmth of his breath on her cheek.

  "Nate. I wasn't expecting company." Her voice squeaked.

  Nate stood too close to her for comfort, much too close.

  "Come up to the flat." Jenni fought the panic risi
ng in her chest, and half-turned to escape up the stairs, desperate to put some space between them.

  Nate remained still, staring at her, a bewildered expression on his face. "Where are your glasses?" The rainwater dripped off the hem of his coat and made a puddle on the floor.

  "You're wet." Jenni licked her lips nervously.

  "And your hair. You've had your hair cut."

  He touched one of the chopped-off strands of her hair with tentative fingers. She couldn't tell if he approved of the changes or not. Not that it's got anything to do with him, she thought.

  "It's not against the law, is it?"

  Her sharp response snapped him out of his trance-like state.

  "I was just surprised, that's all." He shrugged.

  Not entirely satisfied with his answer, she led the way up the stairs, into the flat. It wouldn't kill him to say he liked her improved appearance, would it?

  * * * *

  "You'd better give me your coat and I'll hang it over the bath tub to dry."

  He unzipped his jacket, conscious he still stared at her.

  She reached over to take his coat. He smelt the fresh, soapy scent of her skin.

  "This was a bad idea of mine to call without phoning you first, Jenni. I'm obviously in your way."

  Has she got anything on underneath that hideous dressing gown? The palms of his hands were wet with sweat, and it came as a relief when she vanished into the bathroom with his jacket.

  Jenni reappeared. "Sit down, Nate. I'll get you a drink."

  He sat down on the edge of Jenni's settee, taking care to avoid the broken spring. She disappeared into the kitchen. It was like trying to talk to a human yo-yo.

  "I came to ask you a favour." He wished she would come back in and sit down.

  "Coffee all right?" Jenni's disembodied voice asked from the kitchen.