His Brother's Fiancée

by Vivian Wood

  “It’s not your fault,” Cade said as he jumped into the cab.

  It’s mine. Whatever happened, it’s my fault she’s out there. I didn’t stop her. I just let her go.

  The helicopter was prepped and ready as they pulled into the station. No matter what had happened, as they climbed in they naturally assumed their roles. Cade slipped on his headphones and listened as the reports rolled in.

  “Looking like closer to twenty-five hikers trapped at Northgate …”

  “Are you sure that’s where she is?” Elijah asked loudly over the helicopter.

  “Yeah,” Cade said. He gazed down as the helicopter brought them closer to the flames that licked across the park below.

  I’m sorry.

  The captain’s voice boomed in their ears. Cade made eye contact with Elijah. All the anger had drained out of him.

  “Sorry,” Elijah mouthed.

  Cade just nodded. He didn’t want apologies, or even Elijah’s acceptance. All he wanted was to know that Lily was alright. The chopper hovered above the worst of the fire and Cade gripped the rappelling rope.

  As he descended into the heat, the adrenaline flooded him. Any linger of the pain from the beating Elijah had given him was gone. All that mattered was finding Lily, saving Lily.

  When his boots crunched into the fallen branches, he looked up and saw Elijah and Aiden above him.

  This isn’t Montana, he told himself. Breathe.

  The three of them made their way into the smoke while his radio crackled at his chest. This is it. Your chance of redemption.

  Maybe saving Lily wouldn’t make up for what had happened in Montana. Nothing would. But it was the best he could do.

  This time, with Elijah and Aiden flanking him, for once he felt like he wasn’t alone. It wasn’t him against the flames, it was all of them.

  Knowing they loved her just as much as he did, would do anything for her just like he would, Cade felt a safety and security that he’d never known.

  Firefighters, we don’t run away from the flames. We run straight toward them, embrace the heat. Trust that the smoke won’t blind us forever. Lily, we’re coming for you.

  30

  Lily

  Lily slung the light backpack she kept in her trunk off her shoulders. It was one of her favorite resting points on the gentle mountain. She sniffed at the air.

  A campfire? At Northgate?

  That wasn’t right. The only legal fire areas were down at the barbeque pits, but there was no denying the smell. She focused on steady breathing and climbed up onto the old fallen log that offered the best, but dangerous, view of the surroundings. Lily clung to a sturdy branch and leaned out over the precipice. Below her, flames and black smoke climbed skyward.

  “Oh my God,” she said under her breath.

  Shit, how could I not notice that? Am I really so all up in my own head that I don’t notice a freaking fire?

  She reached for her phone, though she knew it was pointless. There was no service, and hadn’t been for the past two miles. How many times have I hiked this trail?

  Lily pressed her hand to her abdomen. Even though her stomach was still taut and flat, she could feel the tiny life that grew inside her.

  Move. Move! she commanded herself. There were two options. Descend down the sheer rock face on the opposite side of the mountain, or keep hiking upward.

  You couldn’t handle the rock face when you weren’t pregnant, she admonished herself. Lily had only ever known one hiker who could do it, and he was the guy who trained her at the rock climbing gym.

  And how high are you going to hike? she asked herself as she pulled the backpack on.

  “What happens when I reach the top?” she asked aloud as she started on the switchbacks.

  She was tempted to take a shortcut straight up the mountain, but the life that glowed inside her told her to stick to the trails. The last thing you need is to get hurt on top of being stranded.

  As Lily picked up her pace, she felt cold sweat pool at the small of her back.

  Maybe if I get high enough, there won’t be enough vegetation or oxygen for the fire to survive. She tried to remember all the facts her brothers and Cade had memorized when they were recruits.

  What would a firefighter do in this situation? she wondered. Higher it is.

  Part of her knew that she was just taking up time. But hiking upward gave her something to think about—something besides Cade. Something besides their baby.

  Where the hell are Cade and my brothers? Are they close? God, what if Cade never got the note?

  She’d scribbled it quickly and couldn’t remember how well she’d snapped it under the windshield wiper. Maybe it blew away. Maybe some punk kid took it as a joke.

  I’m sorry, I take it back. I should have never picked that fight, she thought to herself. Just keep going. Higher. Higher.

  A part of Lily wished desperately that she’d run into other hikers. Find some sense of hope. But a bigger part of her hated herself for wishing this on anyone else.

  She remembered Elijah always talked about how it was the smoke, not the fire, that usually killed a person. So does that make it a better way to go?

  Lily looked back once, but it seemed like the smoke was thicker. Closer.

  Don’t turn around, she told herself. As she rounded a switchback, she stumbled over a root that shot out of the ground.

  Shit! Already her ankle started to swell. She pushed herself up from the ground, brushed small stones and debris from her palms, and willed herself forward.

  What the hell am I supposed to do now that I can’t outrun the fire?

  She made it a few more yards before even she could tell she was doing more harm than good. A log along the rim of the trail beckoned to her.

  So, what? I’m just supposed to wait here to die?

  Lily thought she could see the flames as they reached up the trail toward her, but she couldn’t be certain. The air was so thick with smoke, she wasn’t sure what she was seeing. She pulled her jacket up to cover her mouth and nose and started to cough.

  Lily was desperate for oxygen, but with every breath she remembered their baby breathed in the same air. Instead, she took light sips of air through the nose and prayed that it was clean enough.

  A crackle filled the air. There was no way to deny it. The flames were visible, and they raced up the trail at a speed she couldn’t have outrun even if she hadn’t messed up her ankle.

  Lily slid the backpack off as tears streamed down her face. She couldn’t tell if it was from the smoke, from all the regrets, from the life with Cade and their child she saw falling away, or all three.

  She pulled off her jacket and peeled away her sweatshirt to use as a bandana.

  Heat rises. Smoke must, too. Lily positioned herself behind the log and lay down flat on a sprawling fern. As she wrapped the sweatshirt around her face as a makeshift mask, she splayed the bright green jacket over her. If they’re looking for me, if anyone’s looking for me, please, God, let them see this.

  “I’m sorry,” she whispered into the smoky air.

  She didn’t know if it was to Cade, to their baby, or to herself. She’d barely had time to even process the fact that she was pregnant.

  And see what you did when you found out? You ran away—just like you always do.

  Her head swam with pieced-together thoughts. Lily remembered her mother, and how good that buttery toast tasted at two in the morning while they waited for her dad. She saw Jean-Michel, a perpetual smear of flour across his face.

  “Love is never free.”

  In the distance, she heard another voice. They all blended together, but this one was soothing, deep and steady. Cade?

  Lily forced herself up onto her elbows. She coughed violently into the sweatshirt, but when she tried to remove it, that made it worse.

  “Lily!” the voice called in the distance.

  “Cade,” she croaked out. She couldn’t make her voice any bigger. “Cade!” she finally man
aged, from a strength deep inside.

  She heard the crunch of boots on hard ground. As the black smoke rose from below her, Lily thought she saw a figure emerge. It was yellow, like the tips of a fire. She couldn’t figure out if it was real or her imagination gone wild with the smoke.

  You found me, she thought. But in that instant, the figure disappeared again.

  You’re imagining this, she told herself. It’s okay, let go.

  Lily lay back down and did her best to pull the reflective jacket over her body.

  Just get onto the log, she told herself. If anyone comes by, they need to see you.

  She pulled together the last bit of her strength and hoisted herself onto the log. Deep within, she thought she felt something shift. It wasn’t a kick, it was way too early for that. But it was there.

  I’m here, it seemed to say. Don’t be scared.

  Lily let her eyes close, convinced herself it was to keep the sting of the smoke away. In the darkness, just like everyone said, her life was showcased as a montage.

  She was nine years old and walking home from school with her brothers and Cade. She could feel the weight of her plastic lunchbox in her hand. She was one year older and at the firehouse. Cade’s dad was like a monster as he stumbled toward them. She dropped her kite and ran into the firehouse like her dad said.

  Minute later, Cade rushed in as blood poured from his nose. “You’re bleeding,” she said, and took his hand.

  She was in high school getting ready for the homecoming dance with girlfriends she hadn’t thought about in years. Cade walked in with Elijah.

  “I thought you were too old for princess parties,” Elijah said, and she shot him a look. But when she saw Cade, she blushed and looked down.

  “You all look pretty,” Cade said. It made her blush harder.

  It was three years ago, and Tim had just dumped her in the most humiliating moment of her life. Her face was streaked with tears and she dug desperately for her keys in her bag. Cade appeared before her.

  He took her into his dry truck and drove her to his apartment. She drowned in his sweatshirt that he slowly pulled off of her on that couch. The touch of his lips on her skin shot off fireworks.

  It was last month in the bakery. Jean-Michel had a twinkle in his eye when he asked her about the sexy fireman. She wanted to spill it all to him, to gossip and guess and plan an elaborate, ridiculous wedding.

  She was on Renee’s couch with a pint of ice cream. Lily felt her insides soften as her best friend came back, fully, from her time abroad and attempt at escape.

  These are all the things I’ll miss, she thought as her dreams began to mix with reality. These are all the people I’ve loved.

  But at the top of the list was Cade. He was what kept coming back into her memory.

  I’m sorry you’ll never know, she thought into the darkness.

  But maybe he would. Maybe, somehow, he’d find out about what she’d carried into the flames. And maybe he’d forgive her.

  Lily let go of her last grasp of consciousness. It was true what they say. She wasn’t afraid. The heat felt good, like a warm blanket wrapped around her. And the smoke, as it filled her body, made its way into her bones so that she was as light as could be. She’d never felt so light in her life.

  Don’t be scared, the little voice in her center whispered. I’m here with you.

  31

  Cade

  As he made his way up the steep incline, he tried to remember what she’d been wearing.

  Khaki pants. Those old hiking boots. And the jacket. The bright green jacket. Shit, he thought. How am I going to find a green jacket in the goddamned Oregon wild?

  Still, he kept on. He heard Elijah and Aiden behind him. Occasionally, he looked back to check on them. But he had no doubts that they were just as committed to finding her as he was.

  They came upon the first bundle of hikers, and he saw the internal struggle as Aiden began to help them. Every instinct in Aiden told him to keep on, to look for Lily, but he knew he couldn’t.

  “I’ll find her,” Cade called to him as he kept climbing the hillside. “I promise.”

  By the time he got one-third up the summit, doubts started to creep in.

  Maybe she decided to go somewhere else. Maybe she’s sitting in some café in downtown, totally unaware of the fire.

  But Cade knew those were hopeful thoughts. He felt her here. And she was still alive.

  When the smoke became so thick he couldn’t see more than four feet in front of him, his radio came to life. The ground crew had a solid head count. They thought they had everyone.

  “Charles, you copy?” he heard a voice over the radio. He brought his mouth to the speaker, but stopped.

  How would they know if he got the message or not?

  “Cade.”

  He heard her voice, he was sure of it. Even with the fire that raged nearby and the wind that had picked up to carry it, he knew it was her.

  “Lily?” he called. “Lily! Where are you?”

  He didn’t hear her voice again, but her presence drove him onward. He’d already outrun the fire once, near the head of the trail when it whipped around from the eastern side.

  But now it was right on his heels. It shot skyward at the same pace as him.

  Cade ran up the trail and nearly tripped at a log that was nestled right at the perimeter.

  “Shit,” he said, and leaned down to stop the fall.

  His hands rested on something soft—something alive. He pulled down his bandana and saw Lily. She stared up at him like she’d been expecting him.

  “I knew you’d come,” she said.

  Her voice was weak. Cade felt his heart squeeze. He’d known, all along, that he’d find her.

  Lily pushed herself up, and he gripped her under the arms. She held him close, and he wanted more than anything to hug her so tight she’d never slip away again. But there was no time.

  “We have to go,” he said, brusque. “Here.”

  He pulled the fire shelter out of his pack and pulled her toward a small clearing near the rim of the mountain. She started to choke back her tears as she hunkered down beside him. “It’ll be okay,” he said. “I promise. We just have to wait this out.”

  Cade held the shelter over them firmly as the fire raged on top of them. Her small screams blended with the angry fire outside. For a moment, he wasn’t sure if it would be enough. The heat burned into his arms and his hands, through the gear and the shelter, but still he held on.

  “Are we going to die?” Lily asked.

  He glanced down into her eyes. All he saw was trust.

  “No. I won’t let you get hurt,” he said. Cade sensed an even worse rush of fire coming.

  He leaned down and kissed her firmly. Lily’s body responded, but he forced her down and covered her with his body. He felt the shelter blanket him, save for one booted foot that jutted out.

  Cade gritted his teeth as he felt the searing heat across his ankle. Beneath him, Lily breathed fast and sharp. The ground and rocks that surrounded them had heated up to an almost unbearable degree—and that was through his gear.

  He could only imagine how it felt to Lily.

  Still, he had to admit that his girl was smart. She’d found a place that was relatively clear and high. Any lower and they’d have been immersed in vegetation. The perfect fodder for a hungry fire.

  “Hold on,” he whispered into her ear. “We’re almost there.”

  He felt her breathing grow more desperate below him. It wasn’t just the weight of his body or the heat of the ground. The fire had sucked most of the oxygen out of the air.

  “Small breaths,” he whispered into her ear.

  She breathed more shallow, and sucked in only what she needed. He wished there was something more he could do, but all they could do was wait. Cade heard the tail end of the fire pass over them and continue up the hill. Not far from where they were, it would start to sizzle out.

  “Cade,” she whispered.
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  “Save your breath.”

  “In case… in case we… just know that I love you,” she said. Lily turned one cheek to the ground and gazed up at him as best she could.

  “I love you, too,” he said.

  It was the first time he’d said it to her, and wildly different than when he’d blurted it out to Aiden.

  If secrets were heavy, this was the heaviest by far. The most weighted are those you don’t know are on your back. The ones you don’t see coming.

  It felt like they were under that shelter a lifetime. But Cade wanted more. No amount of lifetimes with her would be enough.

  His radio crackled into their little bubble of salvation and gave him the relative clear.

  “Charles, where the hell are you? Do you copy? Goddamnit, Cade.” Elijah’s voice broke into the shelter, and he felt Lily shake with a giggle beneath him.

  Cade got to his knees and carefully pulled the shelter off of them.

  “I copy,” he said. “I have Lily.”

  “Oh, thank God.”

  “Is she alright?” Aiden broke into the call. All protocol was gone.

  Cade looked at her and raised a brow. She nodded. Dirt was smeared across her face.

  “She’s fine,” he said.

  “Where are you?”

  “Uh… near the summit,” he said. “Rocky terrain, lookout point.”

  “You have the coordinates?” Elijah asked.

  Cade reached for his gear pack and started to shout their location into the radio.

  “Copy, ten-four,” Elijah said.

  As he clipped the radio back on, he surveyed the area. The ground was black and smoking. Around them, trees were aflame but the fire had started to die.

  “I can’t believe it,” Lily said. “I thought… I thought for sure… God, I’m so stupid. I’m sorry, I’m so sorry I left like that—”

  “No sorries,” he said, and pulled her close. “We’re alive. That’s all that matters.”

  Lily’s lip shook and tears started to run down her cheeks. She opened her mouth, but all that came out was a gasp.