Find Me, Save Me

by Barbara Gee

  “Wow, Tucker,” she whispered.

  He pushed away from the pillows and sat up, pulling a blanket up around her shoulders and lifting her legs across his lap.

  “Too much?” he asked softly, reaching up to run the pad of his thumb slowly across her swollen bottom lip.

  She quickly shook her head. “No, just overwhelming.” She sighed and met his blue gaze. “Kissing you is incredible, Tuck. The best thing ever. I feel like I can’t get enough of it.”

  He smiled. “That’s the way it should be.”

  “Yeah, I know, but this is all new to me.” She dropped her eyes and slid her arms around him, pressing her face into his chest and breathing him in. “It’s hard to describe, but being with you makes me feel so much more than I ever knew there was.”

  He cupped her chin and raised her head back up, his eyes hot and intense. His other hand moved restlessly over her back. “It’s all I can do to keep from showing you how much more there is, Madison.”

  She smiled, feeling her cheeks get warm. “I’m glad. I mean I know we can’t go there, but I’m glad you want to.”

  Tuck ran a hand through his short hair and raised his head to look at the stars, taking long breaths of the cool night air. When he looked at her again, she could see that he had regained some control. He took one of her hands in his, rubbing his thumb up and down the length of hers.

  “Three years ago I rededicated my life to God and got back on track with my Christian walk,” he told her. “One of the vows I made was to not have sex again unless I got married. I’ll keep that vow, Madison, but I won’t keep away from you. I think I can read you pretty well, but please, if I do anything that makes you uncomfortable, let me know, okay? I won’t get mad and I won’t push for more, you have my word on that.”

  “I trust you, Tuck,” she told him readily. “Maybe more than I trust myself.”

  He tucked her hair behind her ear. “One other thing, Madison.”

  She looked at him curiously.

  “We’re exclusive, okay? Libby keeps talking about you and another ranch hand double dating with her and Cal. Maybe she’s teasing, maybe she’s not. But I don’t want to be thousands of miles away and worrying about you going on a date with someone other than me.”

  “I think she’s just messing with you, like little sisters do. She knows I’m not interested in anyone at the Full Heart.”

  “Good.” He smiled wryly. “This possessive streak is new to me. I’m a little uncomfortable with it, to be honest. It tells me I feel vulnerable and I’m not exactly used to that.”

  “Because you’re a big badass alpha male,” Maddy teased.

  Another slow smile. “I can summon some badass when it’s called for. It’s part of the job. Otherwise I’m a lamb.”

  “I think not,” Maddy said softly. “But that’s okay. I don’t mind a little badass.”

  Tuck took her face between his hands. “There’s a lot of darkness in my life. You know all too well that to catch the people I chase I have to immerse myself in their world at times. You know how it was with Jimmy.”

  Maddy put her hands over his. “I know.”

  “On the other hand, you’re all light. You shine like the sun, and I don’t want my darkness to taint you. Don’t change, Maddy. I don’t ever want you to change.”

  She threaded her fingers through his short hair, bringing his head down to hers. “Maybe it can work the other way around. Maybe I can lighten the darkness a little bit for you.”

  His eyes met hers for a long moment before he gave a slow nod. “Maybe you can.”

  He would have kissed her then, but the sound of someone clearing their throat interrupted him.

  “Uh, sorry, I was just wonderin’ if you might be ready to leave soon.” The kid who had shown the movie for them shuffled uncomfortably beside the truck. “I have a curfew.”

  Tuck grinned and stood up, helping Maddy to her feet before jumping off the tailgate and lifting her down.

  “Sorry about that, Teddy. We lost track of time. We’ll be out of here in two minutes.”

  Tuck made quick work of folding all the blankets and loading everything back into the cab. With a wave to the relieved Teddy, they drove out of the movie lot and back through town towards the Full Heart.

  Tuck reached for her hand and brought the back of it to his lips. “So are we good with where things are? You’re okay being with only me, and you’ll tell me if anything about our relationship bothers you?”

  “We’re good, Tuck.” There was no stopping her huge smile. “This was a perfect evening. I’m kinda sad that we can’t ever have a first date again.”

  “If you want, I can try to track down a copy of that movie and we can relive it.”

  She winced. “Please, no. I mean, I’m all for watching another movie with you, but definitely not that one.”

  He held her hand the rest of the way home, and Maddy lost a little more of her heart to him with every mile.

  Chapter 29

  Tuck drove through the North Dakota night, holding her hand and hoping he wasn’t making a mistake. He still wasn’t sure it was wise to get involved with Madison, and yet he was powerless to walk away. Admitting it made him feel weak and needy, but it was the truth. Even as hectic as the final chase and capture of Jimmy had been, he’d carried a constant ache with him. An ache that only Madison Harper could ease.

  Usually when he was working a case that hard, he thought of nothing else. He lived and breathed the case and was scarcely aware of the world around him. This time, however, a beautiful little blonde kept interrupting his focus, and the restless longing hadn’t eased until he had walked into her bedroom this morning.

  She had smiled at him like she’d been missing him every bit as bad, and just like that, he knew he was going to lose the battle. With Jimmy locked up, the immediate threat to Maddy’s safety had been eliminated, and without that barrier, Tucker had caved. He wanted to explore what was between them, and if his feelings for her continued to grow the way he suspected they would, he needed to figure out how to make it work. Because walking away was no longer an option.

  He pulled up to the ranch house, smiling when he saw that Maddy’s eyelids were drooping.

  “You’ve had a long day,” he said gently.

  She nodded agreement. “But it was such a good one.”

  “Even though Jolene put you through the paces?”

  “You and the news about Jimmy far outweighed that.”

  Tucker got out and circled the truck to her door. He leaned in and lifted her once again into his strong arms, shoving the door closed with his hip.

  “Libby must have taken my wheelchair upstairs,” Maddy said when they got inside, not seeing it anywhere in the great room.

  “No problem, it’s not like you weigh anything,” he teased.

  “You could at least use the elevator,” she said when he headed for the stairs.

  “Don’t need it. So do you think this will be the last time I have an excuse to carry you?” he wondered, taking the stairs easily.

  “I certainly hope so. Not that I won’t miss it just a little, but I’m hoping by the next time you come I won’t even need crutches.”

  “That’s only ten days. Think that might be a little ambitious?”

  “I’m an ambitious person. I set goals, and meet them.” She twined her arms around his neck and grinned up at him. “It’s my own version of being badass.”

  He chuckled as they walked into her bedroom. “Nah, your version of badass is head butting Jimmy Callahan and breaking his nose.”

  She frowned. “I’m not sure if that was badass or stupid. I knew when I did it that all it would do is antagonize him.”

  “We all do things in the heat of the moment. I was terrified when you did it, because I knew he’d retaliate, but I was proud of you, too.”

  Her wheelchair was sitting in the corner of the room, but Tucker walked over to the bed and lowered her onto it, then stood before her, hands on his nar
row hips.

  “You know, Maddy, as awful as it was to watch those video feeds, I feel like I got to know you during those sessions. When I finally got to meet you face to face, I already knew you were beautiful, strong, brave, and determined.”

  She blinked back sudden tears. “I wasn’t brave on my own. I knew there was a good chance I wouldn’t make it out of that warehouse, but God gave me peace about it. I didn’t give up all hope, but I accepted whatever was going to happen. Honestly, Tuck, I don’t know how people without faith get through the tough times.”

  “I saw you praying on the first video. Before Jimmy hit you the first time.”

  “Some of the time I was saying the 23rd Psalm. It seemed fitting.” Maddy dropped her eyes to the floor and bit her lip. “I hate that you saw me like that, Tuck. Especially that first night. I knew you and other agents were watching, and when Jimmy took that knife and cut my shirt off, I was so mortified.”

  Tuck closed his eyes and exhaled slowly. “We all wanted to kill him, Madison.”

  Maddy reached out and slipped her fingers through his belt loops, pulling him to her, then she wrapped her arms around his waist and pressed her face against his flat stomach.

  “I prayed you would find me,” she said against his shirt.

  He pushed his fingers through her hair and cradled her head. “I prayed you’d still be alive when I did,” he said gruffly. “It was too close.”

  “It doesn’t matter how close it was, you got there in time.”

  His fingers tightened. “Thank God.”

  “Tucker?”

  “Maddy?”

  She drew back and gave him a little smile. “Do you think we can put Jimmy behind us? I don’t want him to influence where we go from here. I don’t want you to feel like you’re obligated to me in any way because of what happened with him. Promise me that if you realize this isn’t working for you, you won’t make yourself stick it out because you still feel guilty, like you owe me something. Because you don’t, you don’t owe me a thing.”

  Tucker put his hands under her arms and scooted her back further onto the bed. “Lie down, Madison,” he urged, then he stretched out on his side beside her, his head propped on his hand. He splayed his other hand across her stomach, feeling her warmth through the thin fabric of her dress.

  “That’s an easy promise for me to make,” he said. “It’s not obligation I feel, Maddy, trust me on that. And it has nothing to do with guilt. I’m in this because when I’m not with you, I wish I was. I wish I could see you smile and hear you laugh. I wish I could talk to you about my day, and hear about yours. I wish I could touch you.” He nudged her nose with his. “Kiss you. Absorb some of your light.”

  He felt her small hand land on top of his, and he looked into her warm blue eyes and saw his emotions reflected back at him as she smiled the beautiful, warm smile he craved.

  “Okay then,” she said simply.

  He smiled. “Now I need to let you get some sleep. Seven o’clock with Jolene is going to be here before you know it.”

  She nodded reluctantly and rolled on her side to face him. “Thanks for tonight, Tucker. I loved every minute, bad movie included.”

  It felt good to know he’d pleased her. “I did, too. Pencil me in for date number two in about ten days, okay?”

  “You got it.”

  Her gaze dropped to his mouth and he felt the now familiar punch of heat that Madison Harper provoked so effortlessly. When she looked at him like that, her eyes revealing a mixture of hunger and wonder and shyness, his own desire and need curled through him, hot and demanding and hard to tamp down. He could control it, he had to, but leaving without kissing her again was impossible.

  He put his hand on her leg close to her knee brace, then smoothed it slowly up along her outer thigh, over her hip, down the dip of her waist and back up, bringing it to rest on her shoulder blade. When she shivered he bent his head and pressed his lips to the side of her neck where her pulse raced below smooth, soft skin. She put her hand on his shoulder, her thumb feathering across the bands of muscle there.

  How one light touch like that could set him off like a firework Tucker didn’t know, but he did know his limit and just like that he was fast approaching it. He held himself away from her except for his lips. He kissed her hard, then pulled away and sat up, holding out a hand to her.

  “I need to go. My good intentions are feeling pretty shaky right now.”

  Maddy took his hand and let him pull her up to sit on the edge of the bed.

  “Will I see you tomorrow before you leave?” she asked.

  “Yeah. I’ll be heading out soon after seven. I’m sure you’ll be with Jolene, but I’ll come say goodbye.”

  “It seems like you just got here, and now you have to go.”

  “I’ll be back, Maddy. Ten days and I’ll be back.”

  “At least the distance between us gives me motivation to work hard in the gym. The sooner I’m back on my feet, the sooner I can come back to North Carolina and save you the travel time and expense.” She smiled. “And see you a lot more often.”

  “Don’t overdo it, Maddy. If you do too much too soon with that knee, you’ll be back in for a cleanup surgery. Listen to Jolene and don’t push it.”

  “I know, but I’m not going to be a wimp about it, either,” she stated. “And speaking of going home, is it okay if I contact Elaine, my co-worker? I know my boss said he’ll take me back whenever I’m ready, but I’d like to check in and see where things stand.”

  “Are you so anxious to leave this place?” Tucker asked thoughtfully.

  Maddy shook her head. “Of course not. I love it here. But you’re in North Carolina, so…..”

  Tuck smiled and ran his hand over her smooth hair. “I’m not sure whether Libby is ever gonna leave.”

  “I don’t think she will, to be honest. And I think maybe that’s okay. She’s happier and more content than I’ve ever seen her. The Full Heart is good for her soul.”

  “I see that, too,” Tuck agreed. “And to answer your question, I don’t see any reason why you can’t get in touch with Elaine. We don’t need to keep you hidden any longer.”

  “Okay. I guess I’ll see you in the morning, then.”

  “Yeah.” He cupped her chin and tilted her face up, leaning down to press a hard kiss on her warm, soft lips. “Sweet dreams, Maddy.”

  She smiled, weary but content. “You too, Tuck.”

  Maddy was hard at it in the gym when Tucker walked in to say goodbye the next morning. Jolene grinned and thoughtfully excused herself to go refill their water bottles.

  Lying back on the weight bench, Maddy dropped the weights she’d been working with and took the hand Tucker offered, letting him pull her to a sitting position. He straddled the bench and sat facing her.

  “How’s it going?”

  Maddy shivered. That low, smooth voice of his got her every time. There was so much to appreciate about the man.

  She wiped her face with a towel and draped it around her neck. “It’s going okay, but I’m sweaty and gross. Don’t get too close.”

  His gaze ran down over her slight figure, clad in a tight tank top and yoga pants. “I’m not seeing the gross,” he said softly.

  Maddy felt her already flushed cheeks get hotter. “Um, so I guess you’re ready to hit the road.”

  “Mmm hmm. Should be back in Charlotte by about three your time.”

  “Let me know when you’re there safe and sound. A text or something.”

  “I’ll call you,” he said. “I’ll probably call you every day, in fact. That okay with you?”

  She knew her smile told him just how okay it was. “It’ll be the best part of my day.”

  He tugged on the ends of her towel to draw her closer. “I’ll miss you, baby.”

  Desire ripped through her, instant and hot. She absolutely loved when he called her that.

  “I’ll miss you too. Hurry back.”

  “Count on it.” He slid his hands
under the towel to her neck and kissed her, deep and sweet. “Bye for now, Madison.”

  “Safe travels, Tuck.”

  He stood and then leaned down to kiss the top of her head. “I’ll call,” he promised, and then he was gone.

  Jolene came back a few minutes later, grinning when she saw Maddy dreamily staring out the window.

  “I wasn’t sure how long to take with these,” she teased, handing Maddy a bottle of refreshingly cold water. “So things are progressing well?”

  Maddy sighed. “Yeah, I’d have to say they are.”

  “Well, if you don’t mind me saying so, you are one lucky, lucky girl. Like I said before, he’s a man most girls can only dream about.”

  “I know,” Maddy said. “I’m having a hard time believing he’s really interested in me.”

  Jolene arched her brows. “Why would you question that, Maddy? You’re sweet, smart, driven, and gorgeous. I’d say you two were born for each other.”

  “Oh gosh, if you only knew.” Maddy took a long drink of water. “Our lives have been so different, it’s a wonder we’re compatible at all.”

  “Well, from what I can see, you two are definitely compatible. I say go for it. Go with your heart and your gut, and don’t let stuff that doesn’t matter get in the way.”

  Maddy nodded. “That’s what I’m trying to do. I just hope Tucker doesn’t change his mind. He’s so noble and unselfish and he worries about me getting hurt again because of him. If he starts dwelling on that while we’re apart, we could be over almost before we start.”

  “I think it would be harder for him to back off than you think,” Jolene replied. “But enough talk about your enviable love life. Time to get back to work.”

  With a groan Maddy laid back on the weight bench and picked up the weights she had discarded when Tucker came in. Thirty more minutes, Jolene promised, and then she would be released for lunch and a few hours of rest. Later in the afternoon they’d get in a little more work, and of course plenty of yoga, before calling it a day.

  After lunch and a nap, Maddy called the switchboard at the aviation company and asked for Elaine Redding, the Human Resources director who was not only her supervisor, but also a pretty good friend. Maddy was a little nervous since she’d had absolutely no contact with the other woman since being abducted by Jimmy, but she needed to find out one way or another whether she still had a job.