Defiance (Rise of the Iliri Book 3)
Page 44
"A gargoyle?" she asked, looking up.
"Yeah. To chase away the evil that haunts this place. Can I sit?"
"In the grass?"
He chuckled softly. "I like the grass. Hell, I love how open it is out here. You can see for miles, so you always know what's coming. I'll go in if you want, but figured you might like the back-up." He gestured to the gargoyle.
She felt her shoulders relax and her heart picked a rhythm. It was still too fast, but at least the darkness would hide the blood filling up her face. "Nah, I'll share the grass."
He moved beside her but kept a healthy distance, then sat, his legs bent before him. Where she faced the building, he faced the pasture behind them. "You ok? I didn't mean to walk up on you like that."
"Oh, peachy. It was just time for my evening run."
"Bullshit."
She licked her lips as she pulled in a deep breath through her nose. "I'll keep the lights on next time. Won't happen again, boss."
"You know," he said softly, "you don't have to pretend to be ok, Dez. I'm not going to fire you. Fuck, it's not like I'm really paying you."
Turning the gargoyle in her lap, she ran her hands through the soft fur, refusing to look at him. "I'll get the network going. You don't have to be nice to me."
"Kinda do."
"Why?"
Chance groaned softly. "Because you were nice to me? I dunno. Because it's a new thing I want to try." He picked at a blade of grass. "Because I'm a guy and we're kinda wired to be?"
"Why me?" She wanted to look, to see if he was honest, but if she did, she might end up bawling, and she was done with all that.
Slowly, meticulously, he split the blade of grass down the middle. "Because you're a part of the team and that means you're one of us. What happened, Dez?"
"I'm not that high."
"Didn't ask if you were. I asked what happened. Who found you?"
"People who didn't like what I was saying. They convinced me that the scene would be better if I kept my nose out of it." She laughed once, forcing the sound out. "Evidently they didn't want dental floss armor to become endangered."
Her eyes stung just thinking about it. Taking a deep breath, she leaned back, but it didn't help. She took another breath, but her nose was already trying to run. With a sniff, she tried again.
"He's washable," Chance said softly. "I'll watch this side if you need to close your eyes for a second."
"I don't fucking cry," she mumbled, but her own voice was betraying her.
He nodded slowly. "Nah, I gotcha. It's spring, though, and sometimes those allergies are a killer."
"Yeah."
The first tear leaked out. It was always the first one that caused the problem, because after that, the rest knew which way to go. One after the other they pushed at her eyes, stampeding down her cheeks until she had to gasp to try to stop them. She should have known better. That always made it worse. With only one option left, she took it, burying her face into the grey pelt to hide her own shame.
"I'm not crying."
He said nothing for a minute. When he spoke, his voice trembled. "Me either, kid. Tough guys like us, we don't do that shit."
"I know, right?" She hugged her new toy close. "Why aren't you crying?"
"It's stupid. Just forget it."
"Yeah, I can do that." Dragging her arm across her nose left it wet, so she wiped it on the leg of her pants. "I don't fucking need pity. You know that, right?"
"Pretty sure I got that." He took a deep breath. "Just kinda nice to not be alone."
"There's always people here."
This time, he huffed out the ironic laugh. "Wrong alone."
"I gotcha." She did. She knew exactly what he meant. Being near other people didn't mean she was any less alone, but having Chance give his strange, twisted comfort? It helped. It was like a hug masquerading as a stuffed toy clutched against her chest. "Truce?"
"Yeah. Dez, I got plenty of shit, just like you. I'm not gonna judge." He turned to look at her, proving that his own eyes were glassy in the darkness. "It's just kinda nice to have someone around to take care of."
"I don't need your help."
He smiled. "You kinda do. I also need yours. Truce. I won't fight you if you don't fight me. Maybe we can even try the whole friends thing? You know, like having someone around to talk to?"
"Why?"
"Because you're the only person I've ever met that's more fucked up than me. Because we talk the same language." He flopped back on the grass and looked up at the stars. "Because this shit fucking world keeps trying to rip me apart and make me dissolve into nothing, and I've never met anyone else who can understand the way I have to fight that every single fucking day. Except you."
"I'm not like some sweet little girl that's gonna end up sucking your dick. Being all poetic doesn't get me off, Chance. I just wanna fucking get high."
"Then get high. You can be the tough one. I'll be the sensitive one. See, I kinda like poetry. I think it exists in everything, even the way you try so damned hard to be a bitch but really aren't."
"What does my attitude have to do with poetry?"
He smiled, perfectly straight teeth easily visible. "It's like some heroine from a game. Tragic past, tough attitude, but a heart of gold. Like an epic ballad where she beats the shit out of her demons, wins the castle, and reigns victorious in the end."
"That's how all games end. Do I at least get plate mail?"
"Nah. That's noob armor. We'll get you some body-covering leather that is so tight it might as well be skin, except for the low-cut front that exposes your chest all the way to your belly button. You know, so everyone can see the tattoos."
"Dick." She didn't mean it and knew he could tell.
Chance grabbed another blade of grass and twirled it in front of his face. "Figure we'll make all the companion characters around you men. Super sexy ones, like me. Then we'll dress them in flimsy strips of leather and have their dick and balls held in a tiny little pouch that proves they have nothing down there."
"Nice asses, though, hanging out in the open," she added.
"Oh yeah. And big smooth chests. And thigh high boots – because that always makes sense."
"Long gloves too. What the fuck is it about the gloves and boots with a bare body?" She leaned back to join him. They were close enough to touch, but just barely.
"It's sexy. Look at lingerie. Little panties, tiny bra, but thigh-high stockings. Medievalize that, and you get fantasy armor. Guy looks at that shit and starts thinking about how he could slip a finger under one of those straps."
She shuddered. "No thank you."
"You should try it sometime. Touching, I mean. It's a very different sensation from being touched."
"Touching leads to touching. I mean, I shake someone's hand, and they close their fingers around mine. And just walk up to someone and put my hands on them? That's fucking weird. Name me one guy that wouldn't think I was trying to get laid."
"Me."
For a long time, she said nothing. "It doesn't work out well."
"Offer's still there. Thing is, not touching you is kinda good for me."
"Why?"
He smiled. "What happened, Dez?"
"Not telling."
"Then neither am I." Slowly, he sat up. "You eaten?"
Dez shook her head. "I prefer not to. Doesn't go well with Vicodin."
"You worried about the Tylenol?"
"Technically it's hydrocodone, so no acetaminophen. Easier to tell people I'm on Vicodin, though."
"Yeah, I gotcha. I'm still starving and have a laptop for you, but I need a fucking shower." He pulled himself to his feet. "Coming? I think you got enough done in the warehouse, and pretty sure you're not going to run for a while, so try food."
She sat up. "Thanks, but not hungry."
"Not much of you left to starve away. What will you eat?"
"I like candy."
Chance sighed. "I've got some suckers and a little ice cream. You
eat something and I'll give you the wifi password."
"Sold." She stood and dusted off her rump with one hand, the other clutching her gargoyle. "Why'd you have this?"
"Well, I picked up some cable from Ian then had a date. Bitch drug my ass to the mall. Bored to tears, I was wandering around behind her like a well-trained dog and saw it. Pissed her off too." He grinned. "Even more when I told her it's for this amazing girl I work with. Told her you were my roommate, and she decided that shopping wasn't going to do her any good. Made it back to her place pretty fast."
"You bought me a gargoyle?"
"Yep, and got laid because of it." He tilted his head. "So, I figure that means I owe you."
"God, you're a dick."
Slowly he nodded, heading back to the building. "Yeah. Basically. Thing is, women always think they're going to change me, but they love it. They want me to treat them like this because it makes them feel protected. Just makes me feel like the guy operating the puppets."
"Won't work on me."
"I know. You break all the rules, Dez. It's why I respect you so damned much."
Flawed
by Auryn Hadley and Kitty Cox
About The Author
Auryn Hadley is happily married with three canine children and a herd of feral cats that her husband keeps feeding. Between her love for animals, video games, and a good book, she has enough ideas to spend the rest of her life trying to get them out. They all live in Texas, land of the blistering sun, where she spends her days feeding her addictions – including drinking way too much coffee.
For a complete list of books by Auryn Hadley, visit my Amazon Author Page, or check our my website: aurynhadley.com
JOIN THE MAILING LIST