by Amy Clipston
“I don’t want to see them hurt either,” Madeleine said. “I care about them, and I would never want to hurt them. It’s not my intention to cause problems here.”
“You seem like a nice person.” Sylvia tossed the dish towel onto the counter. “I just need you to promise me you’ll be careful of Saul’s heart.”
“I will,” Madeleine said. “But we’re only friends.”
Sylvia seemed unconvinced, and she wondered why Sylvia had made the assumption they were more than friends. The question filtered through Madeleine’s mind while they continued preparing the table for the Thanksgiving feast.
Saul followed the girls and Marcus into the house, where he hung his coat and hat on the peg by the back door and then stopped just inside the doorway to the kitchen. He watched Madeleine help Sylvia deliver food to the table and noticed she seemed at ease when she instructed the girls to wash up for supper. He was alarmed by his strong emotions for her. Yet simultaneously, he enjoyed having her join him for the holiday. He was conflicted in his feelings, but he pushed the worry aside and decided to enjoy the day.
Marcus turned to Saul and gave him a concerned expression. “Have a seat.”
Saul sank into a chair while Marcus moved to the counter and began to carve the turkey.
When Madeleine and Sylvia had finished their preparations, Madeleine sat in a chair across from him. She gave him a tentative smile and then looked down at her plate. Why was she suddenly acting shy toward him?
“Here’s the turkey.” Marcus brought a platter to the table. “It’s time to eat.”
Marcus sat at the head of the table to Saul’s right, and Sylvia sat at the other end of the table. Emma took the chair beside Madeleine, and Esther sat beside her mother. After the silent prayer, the sound of utensils scraping plates filled the air as arms reached and grabbed for the many platters and bowls.
“How do you celebrate Thanksgiving, Maddie?” Emma asked as she plopped a mound of mashed potatoes onto her plate.
“I celebrate the same way you do.” Madeleine spooned some stuffing. “We have turkey and the trimmings.”
“Does that mean you do exactly the same thing we do on Thanksgiving?” Esther chimed in. “Do you have any traditions that are different from ours?”
“Well, let’s see.” Madeleine handed the bowl of stuffing to Marcus. “When I was little, my mom and I would say what we were most thankful for before we started to eat.”
“Really?” Esther and Emma exchanged smiles. “Let’s do that.” Esther turned to her father. “What are you most thankful for?”
Marcus stroked his beard with his free hand as he met Sylvia’s gaze. “I guess I am most thankful for my family.”
“You guess?” Sylvia raised an eyebrow, and Saul stifled a chuckle.
“No, I don’t guess,” Marcus quickly added. “I am most thankful for my family.”
“That’s better.” Sylvia smiled. “I’m most thankful for my family and our health.”
“Ya, that’s a gut one.” Marcus picked up the meat platter, selected a piece of turkey, and dropped it onto his plate. He passed the platter to Saul. “Who’s next?”
“I am!” Esther raised her hand as if she were in school. “I’m most thankful for our home. I’ve heard of people who don’t have a place to sleep at night, and they must be cold.” She pointed toward Emma. “How about you, Emma?”
“I’m thankful for my freinden.” Emma smiled up at Madeleine. “God has given me wonderful freinden.”
Madeleine returned the smile, and Saul felt his heart turn over in his chest. The love between his daughter and Madeleine was overwhelming. He tried to look unaffected, however, when in his peripheral vision he saw Marcus was studying him.
“What are you most thankful for, Maddie?” Emma asked.
Madeleine glanced down at her plate and then looked over at Emma again. “I’m thankful for my new home and my new life here in Lancaster County.” She then looked across the table at Saul. “What are you most thankful for, Saul?”
Saul looked into her beautiful orbs and then at Emma, who smiled over at him. “I’m most thankful for my family and my freinden.”
Emma smiled, and he returned the gesture.
Saul thought he might burst after enjoying the scrumptious Thanksgiving meal and then delicious pumpkin pie. After dessert, Emma and Esther cleaned off the table, and Madeleine and Sylvia began washing the dishes.
Marcus touched Saul’s arm. “Let’s go outside and check on the animals.”
Saul followed him to the back, where they pulled on their coats and then stepped out into the crisp evening air.
“What are you doing?” Marcus asked as they made their way to the barn.
“What do you mean?” Saul asked.
“I see how you look at her.” Marcus shook his head. “I know you’re lonely, but you know how this is going to end for you.”
Saul stopped walking and stared at his best friend. “Are you accusing me of having a relationship with Maddie? We’re only freinden. Emma enjoys visiting her, and I’m replacing the cabinets in her haus.”
Marcus snorted with sarcasm. “Please, Saul. I’m not blind, and I’m not stupid. You call her Maddie. You only use nicknames for people you’re close to. I thought it was strange when you asked if you could bring her over for supper today, but I never expected you to be this attached. I thought maybe you’d taken pity on her because she’s alone. It looks to me like it’s more than just pity.”
Saul heaved a heavy sigh and leaned against a fence. He’d been caught with his feelings exposed.
“Saul, I’ve known you since we were kinner. I don’t want you to wind up hurt. You need to take a step back before she breaks your heart. You’ve been through enough.” Marcus stood beside him. “I’d rather see you meet someone in our community or even someone from another church district. Emma is attached to her, too, and you don’t want her to experience another loss, do you?”
“No.” Saul shook his head while he stared at Madeleine’s truck. “You’re right.”
“You know I am.” Marcus started for the barn.
Marcus disappeared into the barn as his words soaked through Saul. Marcus was right, but Saul didn’t know how to let go of the strong and overwhelming emotions that were swelling within him.
Later that evening, Madeleine kicked off her shoes before she went to her bedroom. She was full both physically and spiritually after the day she had spent at the Smuckers’ farm. The food was delicious and the company was delightful. She only wished she could get Sylvia’s warning to cease echoing through her mind. Why had Sylvia felt the need to warn her? Why would Sylvia assume Madeleine would hurt Saul? They were only friends!
She was just starting to pull off her tights when her iPhone began to buzz. She reached over to her dresser and picked it up.
“Happy Thanksgiving, Maddie!” Mom’s voice sounded in her ear.
“Hey, Mom.” Madeleine smiled. “How was your day?”
“It was good, but we missed you. I’ve been trying to call you all day. Did you get my messages?”
“Oh, I’m sorry. I went out, and I left my phone here at home.” Madeleine balanced the phone between her neck and shoulder while she pulled off her tights and skirt. “I just got home, and I haven’t had a chance to check my voice mail.”
“Where were you all day?” Now she started pulling on yoga pants and slippers.
“I had Thanksgiving with friends.”
“Which friends? Someone from work?”
“No. Saul, Emma, and their friends,” Madeleine said. “I had an Amish Thanksgiving.”
“What?” Her mother gasped. “I thought you were convinced Saul didn’t like you.”
“Oh, he’s been much nicer recently. He’s going to replace my kitchen cabinets.” She tried to pull off her blouse but wound up tangled in it. “Hang on a minute.” She placed the phone on the dresser and changed into a long-sleeve shirt. “Okay. I’m back.”
“Madel
eine Dawn!” her mother snapped. “Tell me about Saul and Emma.”
“I will. Just calm down.” Madeleine sank onto the edge of the bed. “We’ve been spending time together lately, and I asked them if they had Thanksgiving plans. Saul invited me to go with them to have Thanksgiving dinner with his best friend, Marcus, and his family. We had a really nice time.”
“And he’s replacing your cabinets?”
“Right,” Madeleine said. “He’s a cabinetmaker, and the kitchen cabinets are almost falling off the walls. You had to have noticed that when you were here for Mammi’s service.”
“Ya, I did.” Her mother’s voice was softer. “My daadi helped my dat build those cabinets a very long time ago.”
Alarm seeped through Madeleine. She’d never heard her mother use Dietsch words before. “Do you want me to leave them? I can ask him to fix them instead of replacing them.”
“No, no,” her mother said. “It’s your house now. You do what you want with it.”
“No, Mom.” Madeleine shook her head. “Don’t be like that. I don’t want to upset you.”
“It’s fine, really. Tell me about your day with Saul and his friends.”
Madeleine shared what they ate and how much fun they had talking. “It was a great day. I’m enjoying my new Amish friends. I really feel like I belong here. I mean, I don’t even miss electricity or television. I only use my phone to talk to you. And Saul is very sweet. I’m enjoying getting to know him and Emma. Emma told me I’m her best grown-up friend. I helped her figure out how to handle a bully the other day.” She paused, but her mother remained quiet. “Hello? Are you there, Mom? Did we get disconnected?”
“I’m still here. I was just listening. I know you like spending time with Saul and Emma, but you need to remember that they’re Amish.”
“How could I forget that, Mom?” Madeleine asked while rolling onto her side and facing the wall. “I know we’re from different worlds. I’m just enjoying their company.”
“Well, you sound like you’re really close to them.”
“They are sort of like my family, even though we’re not related.” Madeleine shook her head. “I’m not making sense. I’m enjoying being here and being a part of their community. I think I want to go to a church service. Mammi used to take me to them. I might call Carolyn and see if I can go to a service with her again.”
“That sounds nice,” Mom said. “I remember you enjoyed going to services with your grandmother. Just be careful, okay? I don’t want you to get hurt. You have to remember that Saul lives by certain rules, and those rules are strict.”
“Is that why you left?” Madeleine asked.
“Yes, that’s part of the reason.”
“And my father was the other reason.”
“Yes, I met your father, and we wanted to see the world together.”
“Was it easy to leave?”
“No.” Mom paused. “It was a difficult decision to leave the only life I’d ever known. I had to say good-bye to my friends and my family. But I was certain I was in love. I was too young and immature to realize the mistakes I was making. I had tunnel vision, and I only wanted to get married to your father. I was anxious to feel grown up even though I was pushing myself too hard.”
“I’m sorry. I’m sure it was hard on Mammi. I know she missed you.”
“Yes, I know it was.” Mom sighed. “But your father and I were certain we’d conquer the world. We both wanted to join the military and travel, and the Amish community wouldn’t allow me to do that.”
“Did you ever regret leaving?” Madeleine asked.
“I missed my parents and my friends, and I often felt alone. It’s a big world outside the tight-knit Amish community. I didn’t appreciate how the community took care of its members until I was out on my own. It wasn’t easy after your father left me, but I never regretted my choices. After all, I had you.”
Madeleine smiled. “You should come and visit me. Maybe we could find some of your old friends.”
“I might someday,” Mom said. “I’m not sure if I’m ready yet.”
“Well, you’ll have to come and see my new cabinets.”
Mom laughed. “That’s a deal.”
Madeleine sat up. “Tell me about your day.”
While her mother talked about her Thanksgiving, Madeleine couldn’t help smiling. Her mother was happy in California, but Madeleine had experienced a perfect day in Lancaster County. She was thankful for her new life.
SEVENTEEN
Madeleine called Carolyn Saturday morning. The phone rang several times before someone answered.
“Hello,” a feminine voice said. “This is Glick’s Belgian and Dutch Harness Horses. How may I help you?”
“Carolyn? This is Madeleine Miller.”
“Madeleine!” Carolyn sounded surprised. “How are you?”
“I’m well, thanks. How are you doing?”
“Just great. I’m surprised to hear from you. Is everything all right?”
“Everything is fine,” Madeleine said. “I was wondering if I could go to church with you tomorrow if there’s a service in the district.”
“Actually there is a service, and I’d love for you to come,” Carolyn said. “It’s going to be held at Ruth Ebersol’s haus.”
“Wonderful,” Madeleine said. “I’ll meet you there. What’s the address?”
“Hang on one moment. Let me check my address book . . . Oh, here it is.” Carolyn rattled off the address and directions. “I’ll see you tomorrow.”
“Great!” Madeleine disconnected the phone and smiled. She felt such a strong connection to the Amish community, and she wanted to experience more of it. She looked through her closet to find the most appropriate outfit to wear. She couldn’t wait to experience another Amish church service and meet more members of the community. She was certain her grandparents would be happy to see her immersing herself in the culture again.
Madeleine parked her pickup truck on the road beside Ruth’s house Sunday morning and then slipped her keys into her skirt pocket as she walked up the driveway. Her eyes moved to the sea of buggies parked by the barn. Would Saul and Emma be at the service today?
She smoothed her hands over her skirt as she entered the kitchen where the women were gathered before the service. She hoped she looked presentable. She’d found her grandmother’s cloak and pulled that over her skirt and blouse. She’d also found a Mennonite lace prayer doily and attached it to the back of her head over a tight bun.
“Madeleine!” Carolyn emerged from the circle of women and hugged her. Her eyes took in Madeleine’s long black skirt and navy blue blouse. “You look schee.” Carolyn reached around and touched the lace prayer covering Madeleine had put on her head. “Where did you find that schee covering? I love it.”
“Danki,” Madeleine said as she pulled off her cloak and hung it over her arm. “I found it in my mammi’s sewing closet. I think she used to make these and sell them to the local Mennonites.”
“That’s wonderful!” Carolyn pulled her toward the circle of women. “Come meet my family and freinden.”
Madeleine smiled and shook hands as Carolyn introduced her to the circle of women. She felt a part of the community, and she was thankful for Carolyn’s help. After she met everyone in the room, Carolyn led Madeleine over to a quiet corner.
“How have you been?” Carolyn asked. “I haven’t had time to talk to you at work.”
“I’ve been fine,” Madeleine said. “How was your Thanksgiving in your new home?”
“It was gut.” Carolyn pushed the ribbons from her prayer covering behind her shoulders. “We had Joshua’s parents over, and my family stopped by for dessert. We had a gut time. How was yours?”
“It was very nice. Saul and Emma Beiler invited me to eat with them at Marcus Smucker’s haus. I really had a lovely time. I took two homemade pumpkin pies.”
“How fun!” Carolyn smiled. “Did you enjoy your first Amish Thanksgiving?”
“I real
ly enjoyed spending the day with Saul, Emma, and their friends. They made me feel comfortable and welcome. It was perfect.” Madeleine considered telling Carolyn what Sylvia had said to her, but she decided not to. She didn’t want to give Carolyn the wrong impression about her friendship with Saul.
“I’m glad you’re getting to know Saul and Emma.” Carolyn’s smile suddenly faded. “I want to tell you something, but I don’t want anyone else to hear.” She moved closer to Madeleine and lowered her voice. “Josh still wants me to quit the hotel, no later than spring. I really don’t want to quit yet. I want to keep working there, maybe even longer than spring. But he’s insistent.”
“Oh.” Madeleine studied her friend. “Why do you want to keep working there? Doesn’t he need your help with the horse business?”
“He does, but the job at the hotel was all I had for a long time. It doesn’t feel right to give it up. Not yet.”
“But you’re his wife now. Aren’t you expected to be home and helping him?” Madeleine asked. “Aren’t you supposed to be his helpmate?”
Carolyn sighed. “I know you’re right. I want to be his helpmate, but I also want to help our family by bringing in my own little salary. I can save that money for Benjamin. I can help him buy his own haus when he’s old enough.”
“I’m certain Joshua will help him buy a haus. Isn’t Joshua going to adopt him?” Madeleine asked.
Carolyn smiled. “Ya, he is. Benjamin will be a Glick soon.”
“You don’t need to worry about Benjamin as much now.” Madeleine touched Carolyn’s arm. “Josh is going to take care of you both. You know he will.”
The kitchen clock started to chime nine.
“It’s time to head into the barn.” Carolyn pointed toward Madeleine’s cloak. “You’re going to need that.”