by Laurie Lochs
I nodded and pretended that I knew what Doc-U-Sign was. On a piece of paper, I gave Ash my email address. He led me to the car. As we walked, I couldn’t help but ogle his beautiful ass every step of the way. I wanted to unbuckle his belt and pull his pants to his knees. I wanted to kiss every inch of his ass and make it mine.
My jaw dropped. Was this the problem? Had I felt uncomfortable when we were together because… Well, because I’d wanted to fuck him? It was so crazy, and yet at the same time, I couldn't help but feeling that it was true. I like little things, and I liked being babied… But there was no denying that some part of me wanted to be inside Ash, thrusting into his beautiful body and making him whole. He could still be my Daddy, and I could still be his boy, but I wanted to be inside him.
It just sucked he didn't want anything to do with me anymore.
Chapter 14
Ash
I opened the passenger door and led Trevor into the car. He smiled and slid into the seat. I helped him buckle his seat belt and he couldn’t stop grinning. After he told me his aunt’s address, I started the car and soon we were on our way to his house.
At the corner of Lyndale and 32nd, I asked him all the questions I should have asked at first to put him at ease. "How long have you been playing music, Trevor?"
The boy smiled. "Since I was little, really. My mom used to have a shitty keyboard that "Santa," gave me for Christmas. It was my favorite gift. It was the first thing I ran to when I came home from school."
I mused this over, trying to imagine a tiny Trevor banging on the keys and driving his mother crazy. "Were you any good?"
Trevor laughed. “Not at all. It took many years and multiple piano teachers to learn how to play anything even remotely noteworthy. But my first recital was when I was seven years old, and I never will forget how proud I was to play Fur Elise."
This sparked my interest. "I didn't know what you were into classical music."
T"I'm not. It was how I learned to play the piano. The second I got the chance, I ditched the lessons and teachers and focused all my energy on learning pop music. Over time, this transformed into the desire — or perhaps it ignited the desire — to compose original songs."
"What was the inspiration for your songs?"
"Boys, mostly," Trevor said, staring dreamily out the window. No doubt he was recalling that time in his life. "There was this one boy in my Spanish class called Charlie. He had sandy brown hair and a perfectly sculpted nose. He was so pale, it looked like his skin would crumble if you did so little as blow on it. Or blow him, I suppose. Anyways, I had the biggest crush on Charlie growing up, and sometimes I would catch him staring at me from across the classroom, with the tip of his pencil between his lips or something like that. It was always the same, glancing up and catching Charlie in the act, staring."
I felt a grin form on my face. I'd had many Charlie's in my day, too. "Did anything ever come of this Charlie?"
Trevor shook his head. His delicate brown curls bounced off his rosy cheeks. My heart swelled but I pushed this down and remembered that this was a professional business relationship.
"Not quite. It was mostly just me staring at him from across the room while the teacher was going on and on about some verb form or another and glancing at Charlie out of the corner of my eye. But after school, I would run home and write songs about him all night. In fact, sometimes I even skipped class so I could go home and write songs about Charlie. You could say that in many ways, he was the central experience of my adolescence."
I burst into laughter. "The central experience of your adolescence, the singular intensity of your dreams.” It sounded like something out of a Thomas Mann novella.
Trevor nodded solemnly. "Sometimes, I would fantasize about pressing him up against one of the push-out windows we had in the Spanish classroom, and kissing his pale neck while he squirmed beneath me. In my dreams, Charlie wanted every kiss I gave him, every offer of hot affection and friendship everlasting. When I ran my fingers over his collarbone, he would quiver beneath me and beg me to pull out his cock. Sometimes, I would drop to my knees and slowly peel back his zipper, and pull his cock through his fly and take it in my mouth. Other times, I would press Charlie's face into the glass, and pull down his pants from behind. After gripping his hips, I would slide a wet finger into his hole and make him moan. His sandy blond curls would collide into the window, and the seashell necklace he always wore would crash into the glass. With the teacher and everyone else in the classroom staring, I would saunter up to Charlie and breed him in front of the class. When he came, his body would tremble beneath me and he would explode all over the radiator, leaving quite the cleanup for the janitor when school let out later that day."
"You had quite the imagination for a little boy."
"I guess," Trevor said wistfully, running a finger through his hair. At once, I wanted to probe this boy for more information. He had layers like an onion and I knew there was more to him than met the eye. He was so much more than his pretty face and beautiful songs. His delicate skin held a profundity of which I'd only scratch the surface, but which I’d give my life to explore.
Stop, you moron. He’s your fucking employee.
After I dropped Trevor off, I pulled to a nearby corner and replayed what he'd said in my mind. What was most striking to me was that, in his deepest fantasies, Trevor was not the one being dominated at all. Though I hadn't quite heard him say it out loud, it sounded like Trevor was… Well, that he was a top. And yet when I held him in my arms in the playroom, he'd fit into my grip so perfectly like he’d been born to do it. This was a contradiction. I didn't know how to make sense of it in my head.
But when I arrived home, the key to the lock suddenly manifested itself to me. "Oh, my God," I whispered, setting the key in the rack when I'd come into the house. "He's a switch."
How could I have been so stupid? Of course the boy was a switch. He liked being little, but he also liked to fuck when he had the chance. He wasn't some pretty little thing begging to be dominated and get his head shoved into the pillow by an older man. If anyone was going to be doing the fucking, it would be Trevor. And that was…
Well, fuck. That was okay with me.
"It's been so long since you've bottomed," I whispered to myself, dropping my pants and climbing into bed. I pulled the sheets all the way up and stared at the ceiling. "What if Trevor can fill that void?"
I brought my hands to my cock and gripped it. I moaned and brought myself to an erection. With the moonlight pooling through the window, I closed my eyes and let the events he'd described in the car fill my mind. Suddenly, I was no longer lying under warm covers, but standing in the very classroom Trevor had described, watching him seduce "Charlie" and bringing the boy to life. Then, my fantasy switched, and suddenly I was the one Trevor was pressing into the glass, and it was my ass into which he was sliding a hot, wet finger, and penetrating me in front of the class. I stroke myself frantically, feeling my body tense as I imagined Trevor enter me, sliding his thick cock into my hole and making me his own. He was still my boy, and I was still his Daddy, but sometimes boys liked to fuck their daddies and claim them as their own. This is what I’ve always wanted, I thought to myself as I reached my climax. I gasped as my balls rose into my body, thrusting upwards, feeling Trevor's soft boy hips plunging themselves again and again into my ass. I exploded all over my chest.
I dozed off to sleep. When I woke, I cleaned myself off. When I finished, I rolled onto my belly and stared wide-eyed out the window.
This is your employee, Ash. If you're going to have these fantasies, you have to keep them to yourself and not let Trevor know. Even if he is a top, you promised him that you wouldn't let your own attractions interfere with his work. You have to keep it professional. You can’t bring this up around him.
With a sinking heart, I closed the window and went to bed.
Chapter 15
Trevor
It was the day of my first rehearsal at Asteria. I g
rabbed my bicycle and threw all my stuff in the backpack to get ready before my aunt could object. There was no way I was taking the bus, not after last time. I would do the 30 minute bicycle ride and arrive at Asteria 10 minutes early. I wanted to make a good first impression because, well… Ash.
Since he drove me home two nights ago, Ash had been the only thing on my mind. None of the worries that had occupied my daily life before the drive — like paying auntie for rent or finding a place to stay once she inevitably kicked me out of the house — even bubbled to the surface. It was nothing but Ash. In my mind, it was Ash who wrapped his arms around me and slipped his fingers into the band of my diaper while he held me close and stroked my cock.
He was the man I’d dreamt of my entire life. Of course, I didn't ever know him in my real life, but this was the exact man I pictured in my mind when I fantasized about being held by strong arms. Ash was the living prototype of the man I wanted to baby me, bottle me, and buy me baby things.
I swung my backpack over my shoulder and made my way to the bike. After 30 minutes, I'd arrived in front of the club. Ash stood in the doorway to greet me.
"Well," he said, "would you look at that. 15 minutes early, no less."
I wiped sweat from my forehead and shook my hair over my shoulders. "I tried to get here in time, Sir. You never know if your bike tire will rust off."
Ash laughed. “First, don’t call me Sir… I don’t think you know what that means. Second, why don't you lock it up right there? We can get down to business in the Dungeon."
Something flickered in my gut, but I quickly suppressed it. I knew Ash had a different understanding of "get down to business" than me, and I didn't want to scare him off by making him think I might want to have sex with him.
Or… Well, that wasn't exactly true. Because what I really wanted to do was fuck him. For the past two nights, I'd been doing nothing but thinking about breeding Ash. I wanted to plow his face into the pillow and make him mine. His ass was so thick, round, bristling with coarse hairs… I wanted to make every inch of it my own. I wanted to bend him over the bed and enter him stealthily, like a thief in the night, and ram him against the mattress until it snapped and we both came crashing to the floor. The only way I wanted to hear him was whimpering in pleasure beneath me. Of course, he could stop at any time… But there was something so sexy about him beneath me, heaving, breathless, unable to stop the inexorable flow of come.
I forced the images from my mind. Today was about one thing, and that was my rehearsal for the talent night. If I didn't bring my A game today, I had little doubt Ash would send me packing, as this was too big of an event to fuck up.
With a grin, Ash led me into the Dungeon and onto the makeshift stage where I would perform. I gasped as I took in the set. It looked nothing like before. It was at least five times bigger than I remembered. In the middle of the stage, a giant stripper pole rose towards the heavens, glistening and polished to perfection. Suddenly, I wanted to throw myself on the pole and see if I could dance. But it was only a passing thought, and I did no such thing because I was here for something very different than entertaining myself on a pole. Or in a cage, which I also spotted on the left side of the stage.
"And here," Ash said, turning to face me with the most brilliant smile. I melted on the spot and pooled on the carpeted floor. “Is where you’ll sing."
My heart leapt at the thought that Ash had just called me little one. When I glanced up, I saw that his eyes had burst open and that he was visibly embarrassed that he let that slip out. I grinned and pretended I hadn't heard it.
"Where?" I said innocently, glancing around. Little one.
"Right here, front and center," Ash said with a wink, leading me to the middle of the stage. My jaw dropped when I finally got a chance to look at what would be the audience. From here, you could even see me from the furthest back corner of the Dungeon. Even the bouncers on either side of the doors would be able to see me perform.
"Oh, my God," I whispered, taking it all in. If this wasn't a dream come true, I didn't know what was. It was everything I'd ever wanted and more.
"Why don't we run through your number?" Ash said, nodding at me earnestly.
"Let's do it," I said, forcing myself to be confident. To say I was terrified to perform in front of Ash was an understatement. Though I’d been able to sing since “the incident” in high school, the thought of performing still terrified me. Especially in a diaper.
But instead of letting my fears consume me, I quickly walked to the center of the stage where Ash had set up a beautiful piano and sat on the bench. I took a deep breath and placed my fingers on the keys. I was just about to start singing, when, suddenly, I glanced up and saw that there were two strangers in the room, standing on both sides of Ash.
Oh my God. Were those his assistants?
The man to Ash's right suddenly spoke. "Don't worry, baby," he crooned, wrapping his arm around Ash. "You'll do great."
I narrowed my eyes at him. Who the hell was he to put his arm around my Daddy? But then I quickly remembered that Ash wasn't my Daddy, that I was only here to perform at his event, and, that if I did so little as give him any indication I was into him, he would send me through the door. He’d made it abundantly clear he wanted nothing but a platonic, business relationship between us. If this was his partner — which I highly doubted, considering that we’d fooled around together — then I’d have to live with it and get on with the show.
Now fully unsettled, I stared at the keys. The notes swum before me like they were made of liquid. I placed my thumb on G and gave myself my starting pitch. The woman to Ash’s right — I think her name was Veronica, the assistant who let me in the other day — let out a whoop and clapped. It was my time to shine.
I started my song. The piano interlude was only eight bars, and so I was soon singing for all three owners of Asteria to hear. The song was a love song I'd written when I was 16 for Charlie. But no one here needed to know that. In my mind, it was no longer Charlie I was singing for. It was Ash.
I let myself get lost in a daze. It was as if the Dungeon, the stage, and even the two strangers by Ash's side faded to the distance as I let the words take on a life of their own. They flowed out of me like water from glacier, and there was nothing I could do to stop the flow. While I sang, the only person by me was Ash, and we weren't standing in Asteria but in the middle of the galaxy, surrounded by stars whispering our names. While I sang, Ash crept in front of me and butterfly kissed me, our noses rubbing against each other in the soft starlight. "You're mine, little one," he whispered, gracing my cheek with his thumb. "I've known you for a long time. I don't know how, but I've known you since forever. Were twin souls, you and I. You're mine."
When I finished, I sat in front of the piano with my eyes closed for a long time. But I was jolted out of my fantasy by a wild round of applause.
"Oh, my God," the man to Ash's right shouted, "you are so fucking good. Ash," he said, turning to my not-boyfriend, "he's going to be a star."
I smiled shyly at the clapping trio. I made eye contact with Ash and tried to lock him in. He was staring at me in sheer awe. I almost wanted to believe he was thinking more, but I didn't let myself go this far.
"Thank you," I whispered, beaming. My cheeks were burning. They felt like they were about to fall off. But I'd done it. I'd proven to the owners I had what it took to perform. From the sound of their applause, I figured I was going to be making that $500.
"You did amazing."
I glanced up to see Ash standing 2 feet from me. My jaw dropped. His eyes glistened with intensity. I was jolted back to my fantasy were we were spinning in the stars. But Ash smiled and helped me off the piano bench, and brought me over to Veronica and, as I soon came to find out, Stephen.
"That was so good, baby," Stephen said, winking at me. I felt myself blush even harder. "But there's just one thing…”
I gulped. What was it? I opened my mouth to ask. But before I could speak, Stephen turn
ed to me and said, "I don't know if Ash told you this, but… If you're going to perform, you have to do it in kink."
Chapter 16
Ash
My heart seized the minute he said those words. It's not up to you to say that, I wanted to say. It's me who needs to make Trevor feel comfortable, and you just made him uncomfortable as hell.
But a second later, Trevor burst into a grin. "I know," he said slyly, "I saw it on the website."
I burst into a laugh. "Oh, my God," I said, "I'm so stupid. You can't exactly miss it, it's right at the bottom of the screen."
"Exactly," Trevor said, still grinning. At once, I was gripped by an urge to bring him close and ruffle his hair, like I'd done last week when we'd played. But I resisted the temptation and contented myself with smiling at him like a father would his son. Trevor glanced sheepishly back into my eyes and smiled.
“But—” Stephen sputtered, “does he know what people will be doing while he sings?”
“I mean, it’s a BDSM club,” I said, “I think he can guess.”
Trevor wracked his brain. “Will they be… Pleasuring themselves while I’m performing?”
I burst into a laugh. “Yes. They’ll be using the dildo wall, jerking off, fucking. I can tell them not to, if you’d prefer.”
“No,” Trevor practically shouted, his eyes wide. “T-That’s… Oh, God. That’s something I’d like.”
I couldn’t help but chuckle at the boy. He was so cute in an innocent, puppyish sort of way.
"Jesus," Veronica said, "call me crazy, but I think there's some tension here. Wouldn't you say, Stephen?"
I whipped around and glared at Veronica. "Please don't make Trevor uncomfortable, dear. He's going to be a star and I don't need you getting in the way."