“It depends on priors. If it’s his first offense, it will likely be five hundred. But if the cop he assaulted shows up, plan to double it.”
“He assaulted a police officer?” I shouted.
“Not on scene. But he wasn’t too happy when they booked him.”
Booked him! I raked my hand through my hair, swallowed, and gave her a smile. “Thank you for your help.”
What was he thinking? Does he have no instincts for self-preservation? I lit a cigarette while walking to my car. At what point do you say to yourself, ‘Yeah, I think it would be a great idea to punch a police officer. That sounds like a fantastic plan. In fact, maybe I’ll even kick him while he’s down.’ What a fucking idiot.
It took several minutes for me to calm down. The sun beat down on me and the air was stagnant. Probably even worse in an eight by eight cell.
I tried to relax, cracking my neck and trying not to visualize the room Jesse had called home for the past forty-eight hours. I’d never seen the inside of one of those cells, but my imagination saw it perfectly. No windows. Four dark gray walls. One sink. A toilet and a cot. And nothing but his thoughts to keep him company. Fear consumed me, and strange vibrations rang in my ears.
“Charlie?”
Taking a deep breath, I turned to my name. “Hey, Lily.”
How did she get here so fast? How long have I been standing here?
She walked to me with fear behind her eyes. “Tell me he’s alive.”
My eyes widened, never blinking. “Of course he’s alive.” Her question threw me off guard.
She looked up to the sky, folding her hands together like a prayer in silent thanks. I’d hoped she was just overprotective and that there was nothing to really be concerned about, but for how grateful she looked, I had my doubts.
“He’s fine. I think he just needs money,” I added.
“If I could afford it, I would get him out of there in a second.”
“What about his parents?” I asked. “Do you think it would do any good to ask—”
“No. They made it clear to him long ago that they wouldn’t continue bailing him out. They’re rich, but they have pretty strict morals. And I know Jesse is grateful for all they’ve done. He probably wouldn’t even want them knowing the predicament he’s in.”
I nodded. “I’m going to try to scrape together his bail, but I can’t promise anything.”
Lily set her hand on my shoulder. “I’m just going to say this now, because I don’t know if you’ll ever hear it from Jesse.” She smiled. “Thank you, Charlie.”
“I haven’t done anything yet.” I smirked.
She nodded. “You’ve already done plenty.” Lily turned to her car, but swung back around when I called her name.
“Lily! I forgot to tell you, thanks for the sunflower.”
A tiny divot formed between her eyes. “What sunflower?”
I stilled for a moment in realization. She’d never given the flower to Jesse as a gift to me.
“Never mind,” I whispered. Clearing my throat, I spoke louder. “I’m sure I’ll see you again soon.”
Chapter Eleven
Charlie
I didn’t have much time. It was already after dinner and I hadn’t asked Dad for the money. He was Jesse’s only hope.
For a brief moment I’d considered using the money I’d saved for my weekend with the girls to bail him out. But there was no way that would fly with Angie. If Jesse talked about me at work, it was sure to get back to her. It wouldn’t have been enough anyway.
After dinner, I sat with Mom and Dad as they watched Wheel of Fortune. Mom would call out the answer to the puzzle as soon as the first letters were turned, and Dad would shout obscenities to the contestants for not having it figured out yet.
They were always such a goofy pair, Mom and Dad. But the best kind of goofy.
A commercial break came on and I seized the opportunity.
“Hey Dad, I have a hypothetical question.”
“What?” he said, taking a sip from his manhattan.
“Hypothetically, would you happen to have an extra five hundred dollars lying around that I could use to bail a friend out of jail?”
He almost spit out his drink, wiping his mouth with his forearm. “Hypothetically?”
“Yep!” I smiled, shifting my eyes around the room.
“Depends. What is your friend in there for?”
“Oh, I don’t know.” I waved my hand out in front of me. “Let’s say fighting.”
“Then no.”
I nodded, looked to the ground, and tugged at my lip. “Okay.”
Mom’s eyes carried concern as she looked to Dad and back to me again.
We sat silently through Vanna and Pat introducing the next puzzle, and Mom called out the answer right away. “Something Wicked This Way Comes!”
“He landed on a thousand! Pick the M, you jackass!” Dad spat.
Dad was a pretty level-headed guy when it came to most things, and I always knew I could go to him for just about anything. But Wheel of Fortune was something that made his logical sensibilities turn feral. If I had a blood-pressure cuff on him, his numbers probably would’ve shot past the scale.
“All right, Charlie.” Dad muted the TV. “Which friend is in jail?”
I chewed the inside of my cheek. “Jess.”
“And who is this Jess person? Do I know them?”
“No. I…I’ve spent some time with him, and he’s really a good guy. Well, sort of. Um, I guess he’s kind of dick sometimes—”
“You’re really not selling me on this one.”
“But he can be really sweet, too.” I smiled.
He dipped his chin and narrowed his eyes. “Do you have a boyfriend? Is this Jesse guy your—”
“No!” I shouted. “Nothing like that. He’s just misunderstood, I guess.”
“If he was fighting and they threw his ass in jail, maybe he should stay there for a day or two. Might do him some good.”
I nodded because I couldn’t disagree. I’d thought all of this at some point since that morning, and I’d fought with myself over whether or not it was worth it. He wasn’t my responsibility. He wasn’t my problem.
“I think he might lose his job if he misses any more work.”
Dad sighed. “Will he pay me back?”
I lifted my head, hopeful Dad was at least considering it. He owed Jesse nothing, but Dad was a lot like me: if a friend was in trouble, he’d do his damnedest to get them out of it.
“I don’t know. But if he doesn’t, I will.”
He nodded and took another sip. “My wallet is on my dresser. Go get my cash card. You can withdraw three hundred a day. If you hurry and get to a machine before seven o’clock, when you wake tomorrow morning, you can get the rest.”
“You don’t have to do this.”
He smiled. “Neither do you. But I can see it’s important to you.”
I jumped up and sprawled my arms around him. “Thanks, Dad,” I whispered. “You’re the best.”
***
I called Lily the next morning and told her that I’d posted Jesse’s bail. I knew Jess would find out it was me eventually, but I asked Lily to keep it anonymous. As it was, I had no idea if he’d be grateful or pissed that I had come up with the money. I guess it would depend on what kind of mood he was in when he found out.
Telling Lily that I’d be out of town for the weekend, I also mentioned the excuse I had given to Adam about a dead uncle, and that Jesse would probably want to allude to a corpse in his conversation with management. She seemed to find that funny, and laughed while simultaneously thanking me over and over.
But with the drive to Hastings and back, I was already late to meet the girls. A few minutes after noon, I quickly packed my car and called Karalee.
“Hey, sorry I’m late. Do you have the address? I can just meet you there. I had some stuff to take care of this morning.”
“Are you sure? We can wait for you,” Karal said.
“Nah, it’s fine. Go ahead, and I’ll be right behind you.”
“All right. I’ll text you the address. Angie and I will take her car. It’s about two hours north on 169.”
“I can’t wait!” I giggled.
I drove alone to the lake house, smoking cigarettes and listening to a Bosstones CD I’d bought. Once I figured out how to map the address on my phone, the miles stretched between me and my hometown. So did my thoughts about Jesse. The proximity seemed to ease my mind, and I was reassured he was probably already home, safe and sober. Well, home anyway.
The cabin was glorious. The small, two-story house sat on over an acre of green grass. The yard spanned out to another half-acre of sandy beach where the waters of Lake Mille Lacs bubbled to the shore. Inside the home was a simple eat-in kitchen, a small den with a stone fireplace, and a four-season patio facing the lake. Upstairs was nothing but a loft with six beds.
It was perfect.
I tossed my bag onto one of the beds upstairs and joined Karalee and Angie out by the fire pit. Angie threw me a beer and held hers up.
“Cheers! To bonfires, bitches, and booze. Boys, bills, and blondes can suck my dick!”
No matter how hard I tried, I never got sick of Angie’s crassness. It came with the territory. Her mouth tended to vote her as least popular, but most of the things she said could be taken in stride. Nothing she said was ever as offensive as Jesse could be, no matter how he intended them to sound.
I squeezed my eyes shut, trying to block him from my mind. I’d vowed I wasn’t going to think about him that weekend, and it had been three hours—a personal record in the four or five months since I’d laid my eyes on him.
The afternoon came and went, and by nightfall Karal was cross-eyed, Angie kept tripping over invisible logs, and I was peeing every seven minutes. It was safe to say we were wasted.
And I couldn’t have been happier.
Thoughts of Jess were minimal. I wasn’t worried about my car payment, job, or driving home. And I didn’t care how many calories I had consumed. Every doubt, memory, and worry faded with every sip I took. Before I knew it, midnight was approaching.
“Has anyone ordered the pizza yet?” Angie slurred.
Karal giggled. “How about this… I’ll pay for it if you go get it.”
“No! Order it! Maybe the delivery guy will be hot. We can invite him to join us!” Angie said.
“I don’t think anyone delivers out here,” Karal replied. “The closest town is twenty miles away. If you wanted pizza, we should’ve just saved the gas money and got drunk at my apartment.”
“Less bugs,” I said with a shrug.
“Hey!” Angie shouted. “I have a fantastic idea!” Her voice carried over the lake and the echoes could be heard on the other side.
“Aren’t your ideas always fantastic?” I smirked.
“Of course. But this one is es…espesh…shpesh. Ugh, whatever. Esphepeshicially fantastic.”
Karal and I laughed, and as she bent over, she held her side. “I think I’m going to pee my pants.” Karal hopped up and giggled her way into the cabin.
“Laugh it up.” Angie cracked a smile.
The partitioned view of the lake sparkled through the dense trees and I’d never seen so many stars. The night was clear, cool, and the full moon shone down like a spotlight to the beach.
“So what was this fantastic idea of yours?” Karal asked, walking back to the bonfire.
“Oh yeah! I forgot what we were talking about.” Angie raised an eyebrow and looked between Karal and me. “Skinny-dipping.”
“Fuck that business.” I was quick to respond. “People don’t need to see my naked ass parading around. And think of all those innocent fish.” I laughed at my own expense.
“Whatever,” Karal chimed in. “What have you lost now, a hundred pounds?”
I wish.
Oh God, I wish.
“Not quite,” I whispered.
“Well if I were into chicks, I’d totally tap dat ass,” Karal said, trying to make a tapping motion with her hand, only to spill a few drops of her beer.
I laughed. “You mustn’t make offers you can’t follow up on. One more beer and I’d probably take you up on it.”
“Oh. But what about Jesse?” His name flew from Angie’s lips, and my stomach lurched. “Haven’t you convinced him yet?”
My tongue poked into my cheek and I gave her a death stare.
“Whoa.” Karalee broke the tension. “Jesse? Not Jesse Anders. Please, Charlie, tell me it’s not him.”
I groaned. “There’s nothing to say. We’re not discussing him any further. This weekend is away from all that shit. Let’s just drink and…be merry.” I slammed my beer back and grabbed another from the cooler.
Karal’s eyes flickered to Angie and back to me. “Seriously, is something going on with you two?”
I slouched and looked up to the sky, not wanting to talk about it.
“Oh please, Karal!” Angie snapped. “Haven’t you seen the way they are together? Haven’t you heard the rumors? It’s totally obvious that he’s in love with her. The motherfucker is like her herpes. Open, gaping wounds that sting the flesh and tingle her genitals—”
“Ick.” I think I actually felt that comment between my legs.
“He’s always there, probing,” she continued. “Digging deeper, taking over, wanting more…”
Karal put up her hand. “Got it. I can’t say I noticed.”
“She’s lying,” I stated simply. “He goes weeks without talking to me. He hasn’t tried to have sex with me, and believe me, there’s been plenty of opportunities. He hasn’t even so much as kissed me.” I looked down, feeling the regret hit my stomach at my next words before I spoke them. “He doesn’t even want to touch me.”
“Good!” they shouted in unison.
“Seriously,” Karal continued. “Just tell me you’ll be careful with that guy. He’s been known to break a heart or two around that place.”
I shook my head. “Why is everyone warning me about him? I’m the one who knows him. Everyone assumes he’s going to break my heart, but he’ll never fuck me. Can’t you see that? He only has sex with short, skinny brunettes. But he can barely look me in the eye.” I stood and paced the campfire. “No. I’m a tall, fat redhead. I’m nothing. I’m no one. I’m a waste of a human being. Believe me, Jesse Anders wouldn’t even pity-fuck me. Breaking my heart isn’t even a possibility.”
After seeing the look in their eyes and feeling their disappointment, I walked quickly to the cabin without letting them say anything in response.
It wasn’t until I was in the shower that I shed my tears.
Never let them see you cry, Charlie.
***
I woke with a headache the next morning—shocker—and walked down to the smoky campfire to light a cigarette. The girls weren’t up yet, which I was thankful for; it would give me some time to figure out how to apologize.
The lake was calm, and I walked to the beach to get a closer look.
At the shore was a wooden dock. Tied to it sat a large, covered pontoon and small fishing boat atop the water. The beach looked like it had been untouched for years; thousands of small shells had washed ashore over a perfectly bronzed strip of sand.
A sandbar stretched out to the middle of the bay, and there couldn’t have been much more than a foot or two of water above it. Schools of minnows, small perch, and an occasional largemouth bass could be seen roaming the area.
Heaven.
I breathed in and out, closing my eyes and letting the morning sun beat down on my face. The soft breeze brought a welcomed shiver, and I sat down on the dock wondering how many people had been at that exact spot.
“You’re not going to jump in, are you?” Karal grinned and sat beside me.
“Thinking about it.” I beamed. “It’s so beautiful here. How do you ever leave?”
“Have you seen winters up here? No thanks. Most of this town packs up for the winter.”
>
I smiled, staring out at the lake. “I’m sure winters have their place in all this too. I can imagine how beautiful the fresh snow looks in February,” I said, lighting another cigarette.
“You sure smoke a lot.” She looked down, trying to hide her concern.
“How do you think I lost fifty pounds?” I raised a brow and elbowed her arm. “I know. I’ll quit when I get pregnant.”
“Pregnant?” Her head snapped toward me.
“I’m sure it will happen someday,” I whispered.
Karal gave me a half-smile. “Look, I’m not going to press you about Jesse. But I’m here if you want to talk about him. Or anything else. I won’t judge you. Promise.” She put her arm around me and I rested my head on her shoulder.
“I’m sorry about last night. I’d like to say it was the beer talking, but I obviously have some shit I need to sort out.”
“I’m going to say something, babe. And I want you to repeat after me, okay?”
I lightly snorted. “Okay.”
“I’m beautiful.”
I tried to hide my gasp, but failed. “Can we not do this?”
“Just say it once.”
I looked back out into the lake, my eyes glossing over. Another shiver rolled up my arms, and my chin quivered.
“Please, just say it once, for me? I won’t ask you to say it again.”
I sniffed, never realizing before how difficult two words could be, and scratched my head with an embarrassed chuckle. “I’m…” I cleared my throat. “I’m beautiful.”
She squeezed me closer and lowered her voice to a whisper. “When you’re ready, I want you to say it over and over again in your head. Say it as many times as you need to. Say it until you believe it. Because there are so many beautiful things about you, Charlie. So many things you don’t let yourself see.”
I couldn’t speak. I knew I’d cry if I did. So I simply nodded and put my head back on her shoulder.
We watched the sunrise together in silence.
***
The three of us spent the afternoon napping in the sun and curing our hangovers with margaritas and mimosas—naturally—with our feet hanging over the edge of the dock.
Progress (Progress #1) Page 10