Always Been You

by Beverley Kendall

  I emit a garbled sound of pleasure. In that moment, my entire existence is concentrated between my thighs, where he’s torturing me with his tongue and lips. He parts me with his fingers and worries my clit with the tip of his tongue.

  Plowing my fingers through his hair, I’m helpless to do anything but to use him as a rock for when the storm of my release hits. Licking me deep, he pushes two fingers inside me and I explode. My back bows as a choked scream fills the room. My body is rigid, completely immobilized by the pleasure that’s taken over it. Waves and waves of it ripple through me.

  Sex with a drunk Troy had been wonderful, but oral sex with a sober Troy just went on my favorite-things-to-do list. Before the last vestige of my orgasm has let me down from its high, I’m already thinking about what full-fledged sex will be like. Ambrosia.

  Eyelids weighed down by satiation, I watch as he lifts his head from between my legs. His dilated pupils are black with desire. “Don’t you dare go to sleep. I’m not close to being done with you.”

  I drag my eyes open wider. “Do your worst.”

  He laughs seductively, his grin full of sexual promise as he comes up and swipes the condom from the nightstand. With deft movements, he tears it open and rolls it on his hard cock.

  My mouth goes dry, but that’s quickly followed by a rush of saliva. I don’t know that I ever thought watching a guy donning protection would be such a turn on. With Troy it’s like the best kind of soft porn.

  I’m suddenly hit with a need to touch him everywhere. Explore every single part of him. My hands go to his chest and the light dusting of hair there tickles my palms. He feels good, warm and hard.

  He grunts and guides his cock to my entrance. At the first shallow thrust, I gasp and my hands fly to his shoulders, my fingers curling around to his back.

  His mouth pulls up on one side. “You better hang on because I have a feeling this is gonna be a rough ride.”

  I would laugh if I could, but the only thing that comes from my mouth is a cry of pleasure when he slams into me. My breath catches, my toes curl and my eyes roll to the back of my head.

  Bliss. Him moving inside me, hitting that spot time and time again, until I’m clawing at his back and gripping him so tight with my inner muscles, he let’s out a growl. And it’s that animalistic sound that detonates my release.

  I come as if it’s my first time for the night. Like I hadn’t come fifteen minutes ago, the convulsions lasting longer and in the end, leaving me weaker and more breathless.

  I look up. Troy fills my vision, his face contorted and his eyes shut. Holding my hips tight, he gives one final deep thrust, before he slumps forward. I gladly accept the solidness of his weight on top of me.

  “Goddamn, that was good,” he mumbles into the curls of my sex-mussed hair.

  “Can you imagine how I feel? I’m the one who came twice.” My words meander slowly over my tongue, leaving my mouth in a contented purr.

  I feel his lips on my neck. “Don’t worry about me. I’ve got plans for this.” His thumb rubs along my bottom lip. “This.” Then his hands drifts lower and squeezes my left breast. “And this.” And then lower still to cup my sex, starting another riot in my senses. “For the night.”

  I’m only too happy to go along with those plans.

  CHAPTER TWENTY-THREE

  There’s nothing like waking up to the feel of April’s naked body curled into mine. My morning wood has a specific purpose and it would be a shame to let it go to waste. I don’t.

  Kissing April awake, I caress her warm, malleable body until she’s as aroused as I am.

  This morning, the sex between us is unhurried but just as satisfying as the two times we did it last night.

  “Can I expect to be woken up like that every morning?” April teases as she strokes my chest.

  “Every morning and every night,” I reply, smiling.

  Silence.

  “We haven’t really talked about this, huh?” April’s voice has gone serious.

  I glance down at her. “Talked about what?”

  She gives a slight shrug. “I mean are we really doing this? Do you really see us as a long-term thing?”

  Uncertainty clouds her beautiful green eyes, and I realize that despite everything, she’s scared. Scared that I’m either messing with her or I’ll change my mind.

  “I meant what I said last night. I want you. I want to be with you. And I don’t know about you, but I don’t ever see that changing. I love you.”

  Tears pool in her eyes and her hand flies to the base of her throat. I softly kiss her parted lips and after a moment, she responds, sliding her tongue into my mouth. Like the sex we recently had, the kiss is languorous and deep, more an emotional bonding than physical.

  The morning is brighter when I raise my head and look down into her flushed face and swollen lips. The just-fucked look looks great on her. I’ll try to keep her in this state as much as feasibly possibly.

  “I love you.” The declaration sounds like it’s coming straight from her heart but it slides off her tongue as if those words are new to her lexicon.

  Chuckling, I press a kiss on her temple and squeeze her tighter against me. “Don’t worry. You’ll get used to saying it. And doesn’t it sound a lot better than, Troy, you’re such a pain in the ass”?

  She hiccups a laugh and taps me lightly on the chest. “I never said that. I said you can be a pain in the ass,” she adds with a smirk.

  My mouth stretches in a smile so wide it would take a crowbar to pry off my face. It’s been a long time since I’ve been this happy.

  April and me together. A couple. It’s as right as it’s a bit surreal.

  “Liv and Rebecca are going to flip when they find out,” April says, smoothing her hand over my chest. “And then they’re going to say I told you so.”

  Cocking my brow, I angle my head back and look down at her. “Oh yeah?”

  She nods emphatically. “They’ve always said they’re something going on between us. Liv has thought it since freshman year. You know the first time we had dinner with you and Zach at your apartment?”

  I remember the dinner but I’d still been going out with Courtney then. Our breakup had been weeks away, so I definitely wouldn’t have been making overtures toward April. “I don’t remember us acting any differently around each other than we always did. If anyone was playing footsie, it was Liv and Pearson.”

  April snickers. “No kidding. Which explains why they’re together now. It’s called chemistry.”

  “Speaking of which. How the hell did I manage to keep my hands off you all this time?” I murmur and place a kiss on the sensitive spot at the crook of her neck. “Do you have any idea how hard it’s been to since I caught you coming out of the shower?”

  Laughing huskily, she replies, “Oh believe me, I think I have a very good idea. But I’m sure it was for the same reason I was able to keep my hands off you.”

  I lift my head to look her in the eye. “Which was…?”

  “Because rejection hurts one hundred times more when it’s coming from someone you love. I didn’t want to risk that. Plus, you’re the guy. I was hoping you’d make the first move.”

  “I did. You pushed me away. Actually, you said yuck and wiped my kiss off your lips.”

  Her eyes go wide and her mouth falls open in surprise. She stares at me for several stunned seconds before she bursts out laughing. “Oh my god, are you talking about when we were in middle school?”

  “Yeah. Do you know how long it took me to build up the nerve to kiss you?” Try three years. I didn’t care that she’d been taller than me until our sophomore year in high school. I’d crushed on her almost since the day we met.

  Her mouth opens and closes a couple times before she’s able to get the words out. “But we were eleven. I barely liked boys then.”

  “Yes,” I reply dryly. “As your reaction kind of told me.”

  Ew gross, had been her exact response and then she’d scrubbed away at he
r lips as if I’d slimed her instead of kissed her. I hadn’t even used my tongue. Not that French kissing had even occurred to me.

  I turn until she’s half on top of me and she places both hands flat on my chest. “You had a crush on me then?” I can’t believe that amazes her.

  “Why else would I have kissed you?”

  “Because Mark and Charlie had already kissed a girl,” she counters. “You said you didn’t want to be left out.”

  “What the hell did you expect me to say after the way you reacted? A guy’s gotta save face.”

  April seems to contemplate that for a second and then sighs. “You know how I felt about my height.”

  I stroke the length of her naked back and revel in the weight of her breasts on my chest. “Yeah, I know. I kind of figured that’s why you went out with Dave.” I hadn’t realized how self-conscious she’d been until we were in high school. That’s when she’d hooked up with the only guy taller than her in the entire freshman class.

  “And by the time you caught up with me—well actually passed me—you were on to blonder territory,” she says with a slight narrowing of her eyes.

  I laugh. “What did you want me to do? You didn’t want me. I had to move on. I was fifteen and seriously hormonal.”

  “I wanted you then,” she says in a sulking voice.

  “And how was I supposed to know that?”

  She wrinkles her nose. “Oh I don’t know. Boys should be able to tell when a girl has a crush on them.”

  I throw back my head and laugh, jostling her in my arms. “Oh that’s rich. I guess I was supposed to read your mind, because that’s what it would have taken.” As far as I’m concerned, all signs had clearly shown that April hadn’t had an iota of interest in me.

  “What about when you came home from football camp and you’d grown like half a foot. I’d been pretty obvious about it then.”

  Immediately, my mind goes back to that day. We’d been fifteen, soon to be sixteen. I’d spent most of the summer in Maryland with Olivia and he’d spent most of it at football camp. We hadn’t seen each other for over two months when he’d shown up at my house hours after he’d gotten home.

  I open the front door knowing he’d be on the other side. I’ve missed him. I’ve been dying to see him. But the Troy on the other side of the door isn’t the same Troy I’d known all these years. This new Troy is taller—than me!—broader and beautifully tanned. I mean he’s always been cute, but I’ve always been the tall girl in my class, towering a good four to five inches above the rest of my classmates. And that includes Troy. There have only been two boys taller than me, and neither of them gives me the time of day despite my fledging modeling career. You see, tall, thin biracial girls with long, unruly curls aren’t the rage. But as my mother assures me, I will eventually grow into my height.

  For the first time ever, Troy is staring me straight in the eye. His gray eyes look grayer and his hair is cut much shorter than he usually wears it. He still looks like Troy…but he’s hot.

  “Oh my God, you’ve grown,” I say in a voice filled with wonder and teenage longing.

  He flashes his pearly whites at me and drops his gaze to my chest. “So have you.”

  My face had to go up a hundred degrees. For a second I debate whether to cover my insignificant A cups or punch him in the arm. I decide the latter would be a better use of my energy. My boobs aren’t going anywhere.

  “Oh stop,” I chastise. “It’s probably best that we didn’t get together back then because I’m pretty sure we wouldn’t be together now. And I’m also pretty sure that sex in college is a whole lot better than when we were in high school.”

  “Oh I don’t know about that,” he says, waggling his eyebrows. “I’d have been more than willing to have both.”

  My mood sobers. “Well if I had to choose, I’d want us to be together now. Older and wiser. A couple of other relationships behind us.”

  “I couldn’t agree with you more,” he murmurs, brushing a kiss at the corner of my mouth.

  I turn and catch his lips with mine, and the kiss quickly becomes hot. He groans and I moan as our tongues engage in the most intimate of dances. Make love and cuddle. That’s how I’d love to spend the rest of the day. Naked in bed with Troy. But the knock on the apartment door says that’s not going to happen.

  Troy reluctantly breaks the kiss. “You expecting someone?”

  “No, you?”

  He shakes his head and then my cell buzzes with an incoming message. Shaking off my rising desire, I snatch it off the nightstand.

  Liv: Get your cute ass up and open the door. I’ve come bearing gifts.

  Damn. Everyone’s going to know sooner than I want them to.

  Tossing the sheet aside, I scramble out of bed. “It’s Liv. She knows I’m home.”

  “Slow down. I’ll get it.”

  While I’m pulling open my dresser drawer looking for a long t-shirt, he picks his pajama pants off the floor and hastily dons them.

  “Don’t worry, I’ll get it.” As he passes me on his way out, he drops a kiss on the curve of my shoulder and gives my bare ass a light smack and squeeze.

  I have to hold onto the edge of the dresser to stop myself from melting into a heap on the floor.

  Damn Liv. She’s getting it on regular. Why does she have to spoil things for the rest of us? It’s Sunday morning. She should be cuddled up with Zach.

  I throw on the first t-shirt I find and finger-comb my tangled curls before I head out to the front.

  “I can’t believe you both slept this—” Liv halts mid-sentence the second she sees me. Her gaze darts back to Troy and I know the exact moment she puts two and two together and comes up with the correct answer.

  I glance at him. No, I drink in the sight of him, shirtless, tanned and toned, his jaw shadowed and his hair sleep and sex rumpled. Looking down at my bare legs, my braless state and the wreck that is my hair, I’m sure I have the look of a woman who’s just gotten laid. And laid good.

  Placing both Starbuck’s coffee cups on the kitchen table, Liv seems to move in slow motion as she takes in our appearance again. Then her gaze scans the apartment.

  “Is Em here?” she asks, her eyes narrowed in suspicion.

  “No,” I answer. She knows Em isn’t coming back from her obligatory trip home until Friday.

  Eyes narrowed, she states in a faintly accusing tone, “You two had sex. With each other,” she adds as if she hadn’t stated the obvious.

  Troy smiles and slides a glance my way. He gives me the should-I-take-this-one look.

  Heat crawls up my face.

  Liv holds up her hand. “No. I’m stating a fact. I’m not expecting you to confirm it.” She looks at us again, a delighted grin overtaking her pretty face. “Thank God. It’s about time. I was honestly beginning to believe you two weren’t going to get off your butts and do something about—well the sexual tension between you two that you could cut with a knife.”

  “You know I was going to run it by you first, so I’m glad you approve.”

  I’m happy to see that Troy can be all tongue-in-cheek about the situation when I’m decidedly uncomfortable. I’d been on my denial I’m-over-him tour for so long with my friends, admitting I was full of shit isn’t easy.

  “Not to change the subject—” which is exactly what I’m trying to do “—but what are you doing here? This early.”

  “With everything that’s been going on—all the media and crap—I thought I’d treat you to breakfast. I wanted to cheer you up.” She sidelines Troy with a glance. “But I can see you have that covered, right Troy?”

  Troy turns to me, eyebrow cocked. “I don’t know, do I?”

  The heat in my face becomes a burn as I remember the three orgasms he’d given me in the last ten hours or so.

  Instead of answering, I hold out my hand to Liv. “Just give me my caramel mocha latte please. And thank you.” A silly grin creeps over my face.

  Laughing, Liv gladly hands me my
favorite morning pick-me-up beverage. “Sorry, Troy. I didn’t get anything for you.”

  “That’s okay. I can’t drink all that sugar for breakfast. I’m going to shower now anyway.” As he passes, he pauses to press a hard kiss on my lips.

  The second he’s out of hearing range, Liv grabs my hand and drags me into the living room and pulls me down onto the couch as she takes up curling residence there.

  “The whole story. I want it from the very beginning. What happened?” Her hazel eyes are alive with excitement.

  I take a drink of my latte before I launch into the events that led up to me and Troy in bed.

  “He’s been jealous of every guy who’s ever made a play for you. Remember the ski instructor in Montreal?” Liv asks.

  “Hans?” Troy had said the guy was completely unprofessional. Called him a ski gigolo or something like that.

  “Yeah. Every time he came near you, Troy bristled.”

  “Well you remember that better than I do. The thing is Troy has always been that way with the guys I’ve dated. I don’t even think he consciously knew why he acted that way.” After our talk this morning, I’m convinced that Troy had convinced himself that he was simply looking out for his best friend, the same way he’d look out for a sister if he had one. An emotional self-preserving denial.

  Liv rolls her eyes. “I’m just glad he finally came to his senses. That you both did.” Bouncing in place, she throws her arms around me and pulls me to her. “I’m thrilled for you both.”

  I hug her back, smiling so hard, my face hurts. “Thank you, sweetie.” I pull back and stare into her eyes. “I just hope it works out between us.” I don’t have to lower my voice for fear of being overheard because I can hear the shower running in the distance.

  Liv waves my concerns aside with a dismissive flick of her hand. “Of course it will. You two were meant to be together.”

  “We’ve been friends for so long, it’s hard to know how we’ll make the adjustment.” Fact in point, we’d had sex all night but I’d been a bit freaked out by the kiss he’d just given me in front of Liv. It’s getting used to stuff like that. Being openly affectionate in front of our friends is going to take getting used to.