“Oh, my God,” Matty said. “That is beyond cute.”
Fleafarm wagged her tail and looked up at them expectantly.
“Good dog!” Matty rubbed behind Fleafarm’s ears. “Thank you so much.” She took the diaper. “Now go lie down. That’s a good girl.”
“We’re not using a diaper that is covered with dog slobber, are we?”
“Pretend like you’re using it,” Matty said out of the corner of her mouth. “Don’t hurt her feelings by rejecting her offer of help.”
Sebastian sighed and took the diaper. “As life gets ever more complicated.” Then he made his tone bright. “Look, Elizabeth! Fleafarm picked up your diaper. The diaper we are going to use to cover your cute little tush. This very diaper. Absolutely. This one.” He shoved it into the middle of the table and grabbed the new one Matty slipped quietly to him.
About that time Elizabeth started kicking and cooing again. “Damn, how does anybody do this all by themselves?”
“I seem to remember my sister had a strap on her changing table. And a mobile hanging over it, to distract the kid. Let me see if I can help keep her occupied.” Matty moved around him, leaned down toward the baby and spoke in a low voice. “Now, Elizabeth, if you’ll stay very, very quiet, I’ll tell you a deep, dark secret. Something not very many people know. But you have to promise never, ever to breathe a word of this to anyone. Promise?”
Sebastian hadn’t ever heard Matty use that tone of voice. It sounded almost seductive, like the sort of tone a woman might use during lovemaking. He wondered if that’s the way Matty sounded when she—
“Sebastian?” She glanced up at him. “I’m trying to hypnotize this kid, not you. Get busy.”
“Oh. Yeah. Right.” He snatched up the diaper. “I’m on it.”
“This secret is about the owner of that well-known spread, the Rocking D Ranch,” Matty continued.
Sebastian didn’t know how he was supposed to concentrate on diapering this baby when Matty was talking about him in that tone of voice, but he struggled along.
“It seems on a very hot day last summer, this owner of the Rocking D went fishing for trout.”
“Some secret,” Sebastian mumbled. “I fish for trout every summer.”
“Naked as a jaybird,” Matty whispered to the baby.
Sebastian’s head jerked up. “You can’t know about that!”
“Oh, but I do.” She slanted a glance at him, laughter dancing in her eyes.
Heat crept up from his collar. “Travis or Boone saw me and told you about it.”
“Nope.”
“Matty Lang! You spied on me?”
She started laughing in earnest and turned back to the baby. “You know what else, Elizabeth?”
The baby crowed and gurgled, obviously getting into the spirit of the moment.
Sebastian looked at his work and discovered that in his agitation he’d taped the diaper tab to his forearm. “I don’t think Elizabeth needs to hear any more secrets.”
“Are you finished yet?” Matty asked smugly.
“Almost.” He winced as he pulled the tape off and ripped out a few hairs in the process.
“Then I need to keep her entertained a little longer, don’t I?” She lowered her voice into that sexy register again. “You see, Elizabeth, this certain rancher likes to serenade the fish. He swears it brings them to his line. So there he was, standing in the stream in his birthday suit, singing Ghost Riders in the Sky, when the biggest trout you’ve ever seen in your life leaped right up between his legs. My theory is that it was attracted by the dangling—”
“I can’t believe you hid in the trees like some bushwacker and saw all that!” Sebastian figured he was red enough by now to stop traffic. “So how many people have you entertained with that little story?”
“Just one. And you’re safe until she learns how to talk.”
If Sebastian had been all thumbs before, he might as well have been trying to put on the diaper with his toes now. He fumbled and swore under his breath. “And what were you doing sneaking around through the trees when a man was trying to have some private time fishing?”
“Who knew it was supposed to be that private? I was just taking a walk.”
“A walk?” The concept was totally foreign to him. “Likely story. Cowboys don’t walk. They ride.”
“I’m not a cowboy.”
“You know what I meant.”
She sighed with disappointment. “Unfortunately, I do.”
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
“Nothing. I know what you meant, that’s all.”
He glanced at her. “You’re a good hand, Matty. You ride as well as any man I know, and you rope better than most. Not a lot of women can say that.”
She met his gaze. “True. I’ll bet Charlotte Crabtree can’t say it.”
“Are you kidding?” His short laugh made Elizabeth jerk under his hand, and he stroked her tummy the way he would the soft nose of a skittish filly. “Charlotte would be lucky to stay on a horse that moved any faster than a slow amble. Charlotte’s not what you’d call an outdoorsy type.”
“Then why did you invite her out here to dinner?”
Red was becoming his permanent look. “To…um…well, to…”
“Never mind,” Matty said, her voice softer. “I know why. And it’s none of my business. Please forget I asked.”
He couldn’t get over the feeling that inviting Charlotte out to dinner had diminished him in Matty’s eyes. He didn’t like being diminished where Matty was concerned. “It wasn’t like that!”
“Sure it was. Exactly like that. It’s okay, Sebastian. You’re a grown man. You’re entitled to sexual activity.”
And she was a grown woman, he thought as he gazed at her. Wasn’t she entitled to sexual activity, too? And yet he’d never thought about that. He’d never considered that she might be lonely, or have unfulfilled sexual needs. Maybe he’d assumed that Butch’s affair with Barbara had started because Matty wasn’t a very passionate woman to begin with.
But that wasn’t a fair assumption to make. Butch could have been one of those people who needed more than one sexual relationship at a time. Apparently Barbara was like that. In fact, she’d told him she didn’t intend to remarry, because she didn’t like being tied to one man. Monogamy didn’t work for everyone.
Pink tinged Matty’s cheeks and she glanced away. “I don’t know how we got off on that subject.” She brought her attention back to Elizabeth. “You seem to have put that on her, more or less.”
“Guess so.” He studied the diapering job. It wasn’t neat. One leg looked a little too tight and the other one seemed loose. One tab, the one he’d stuck to his arm, wasn’t particularly secure, but they’d already wasted a diaper and he figured this one would hold well enough to get them to the next diapering session.
“Why don’t you snap her back into her sleeper?” Matty suggested.
“Okay.” Sebastian tucked one tiny foot into the leg of the sleeper and started redoing the snaps. No doubt about it, he felt more comfortable with the routine than he had a few minutes ago. He could even work around Elizabeth’s gyrations without going into a panic.
“We should figure out a place where she can sleep temporarily until you buy her a crib,” Matty said.
“A crib?” That sounded way too permanent for his tastes. “I can’t believe we have to worry about a crib.”
Matty gazed at him. “I still don’t think you’ve figured this out. Elizabeth was delivered with detailed instructions and a ton of supplies. Her mother went to a considerable amount of trouble to see that she was set up well. I can’t believe she did all that work so that you could fill in for a couple of days.”
“Well, then maybe for a week.” He finished the last of the snaps and laid his hand over the baby’s chest to steady her on the table. “There’s no point in buying a bunch of baby furniture if she’s only going to be here a week.”
“But you don’t know for sure how
long she’ll be here. I’d also suggest a changing table. It would make a huge difference when we’re diapering her. As for the crib, you could make-do with a drawer or a wash basket, but if it were me, I’d worry about her getting a splinter or somehow falling out. I’d feel a lot better if you bought a crib.”
Sebastian resisted the whole idea. Baby furniture in the house seemed like an admission that he’d indeed fathered this child in a wild and irresponsible act, an act that violated all his principles. He stroked the baby while he talked. “I still say it doesn’t make sense until I know for sure Elizabeth is mine.”
“I say it does, and I’m the one helping you with her, so I get a vote, too. Even if she’s not yours, you could save the furniture for when you do have kids of your own.”
“That might never happen.” The admission made him sad, but he had to face facts.
“That would be a crying shame. I know how you’ve always wanted them, and you’d make a great father.”
He continued to rub Elizabeth’s tummy, and she lay still, her eyes drifting closed. “Yeah, well, I’m almost thirty-five years old, and I don’t even have a girlfriend, let alone a wife. Maybe I wasn’t meant to have a family.”
“Sebastian, are you feeling sorry for yourself?” She sounded a little impatient.
“No.” But he was. Ten years ago he’d thought he had his life figured out. He and Barbara would raise a family on this ranch and then they’d grow old together. One of the kids would take over when he got too decrepit to manage the chores. Except that he discovered Barbara didn’t want kids, and she didn’t much want a ranch once she’d understood the work it entailed.
“You are so feeling sorry for yourself.” There was a definite snap to Matty’s voice. “And for no reason. Women around here are constantly trying to get you to notice them.”
“They are not.”
“They are, too! Unfortunately for them, you’re one of the most oblivious men I’ve ever met when it comes to that. Sooner or later, one of those women will get through to you, though, and before you know it, you’ll be walking down the aisle of the Huerfano Community Church. It’s just a matter of time. You’re probably the only one in this valley who thinks you’re headed for a lonely old age.”
“Thanks for settling my mind on that score.” He couldn’t think of any women in the valley he’d want to marry, but maybe she was right, and he hadn’t looked hard enough.
He couldn’t help wondering what sort of old age she pictured for herself. Women’s lib aside, single women still didn’t have the opportunities to find a new mate the way men did, especially out here in the country. “Have you had a date? I mean since Butch died.”
“One.” She busied herself with the diaper supplies. “Go ahead and pick her up.”
First of all he wanted to know about that one date, and second of all he didn’t want to pick up Elizabeth. He decided to deal with the second matter. “I don’t know how to hold her.”
Her gaze flicked to his. “Now’s a fantastic time to learn. She’s practically asleep, so she’ll be easier to handle.”
“I might wake her up and she’ll start screaming again.”
“I doubt it. She’s fed and changed, and you’ve been stroking her so nicely I’ll bet she’s perfectly relaxed and happy.”
Sebastian looked doubtfully at the little pink bundle on the table. Her eyes were closed and her mouth formed a small circle, like baby dolls he’d seen in the department store at Christmastime. She lay so still she could have been one of those dolls, except for the gentle rise and fall of her chest and the occasional flutter of an eyelash. She terrified him.
“Scoop one hand under her butt and the other one under her head and neck,” Matty said. “I remember my sisters saying babies this young can’t support the weight of their heads, especially when they’re relaxed like this.”
“You do it.”
“Nope.” Matty put her hands on her hips. “Your turn.”
Sebastian almost smiled. He’d seen that defiant gesture a thousand times, at least. Although he’d never known Butch and Matty to cuddle, he’d seen them square off against each other, and Matty had always held her ground. Most of the time he’d mentally sided with her in the argument, but in the interests of friendship he’d stayed out of their disputes. For the first time it occurred to him that Matty might not have been happy in that marriage, even though she’d always put a good face on things.
She gestured toward Elizabeth. “Go ahead. We can’t very well let her sleep on the table.”
A bead of sweat trickled down his spine. Man, he didn’t want to do this. Changing her while Matty stayed right there and made sure she didn’t roll off was one thing. But if he picked her up, a million things could go wrong. He could drop her, or bend her in some way she wasn’t supposed to bend, or squeeze her too tight. He wasn’t good with tiny, delicate stuff. Barbara had forbidden him to wash or dry her imported crystal.
But Matty had logic and fairness on her side in demanding that he do this. He liked to think he was a fair man. Taking a deep breath, he worked one hand under Elizabeth’s bottom. She moved her pink lips in a sucking motion but didn’t open her eyes.
“That’s it,” Matty said gently. “Now support her head and shoulders with the other hand.”
That was the tricky part, he thought. He eased his hand under her head, marveling at the softness of her downy hair against his palm. She opened her eyes. “Go back to sleep,” he murmured, hoping he didn’t sound as desperate as he felt.
She blinked once and closed her eyes again, as if obeying his orders.
Matty chuckled. “Don’t expect that kind of obedience all the time. I think she’s exhausted.”
“So am I. And I’m a nervous wreck, besides,” he added, hoping she might take pity on him and offer to carry the baby, after all.
“Poor Sebastian.”
“You’re not gonna cut me any slack on this, are you?”
“Nope.”
He remembered hauling hurt cowboys out of the rodeo arena, and he decided to treat lifting Elizabeth the same way. Carefully sliding his wrist under her, he was able to support both her head and neck. With a silent prayer, he lifted her from the table and held her suspended in midair, his elbows braced against his ribs for stability.
She didn’t wake up.
He held himself rigid. “I’ve got her. Now where do you want me to take her?”
“Into your bedroom.”
“Okay.” He turned, keeping his arms out in the same position so he wouldn’t wiggle her.
Matty giggled.
“Shh!”
“Sorry, but you look like you’re a butler serving hors d’oeuvres. Bring her in a little closer to your body.”
“How?”
“Like this.” Matty grasped his right arm. “Hey, your muscles are all tensed up.”
“That’s because I’m all tensed up.”
“Well, loosen up your arm, and let’s position her head in the crook of your elbow.” She guided him into the position she wanted.
Her touch felt reassuring. Actually more energizing than reassuring. He could smell that light floral fragrance again, and the scent of recently shampooed hair. Warmth moved through him and settled pleasantly in his groin. He wasn’t exactly aroused, but he was in the pre-arousal stage, when all he’d need to do was tip her face up to his and kiss her, and he’d be aroused.
Not that he would do such a thing. This was Matty he was talking about, and besides, he had his arms full of baby Elizabeth.
“There.” Matty stepped back, as if surveying a weaving she’d completed. “Better.”
Sebastian gazed down at the sleeping bundle cradled against his chest. Elizabeth rested quietly, as if she knew he would keep her safe. Her silent, unquestioning faith did something funny to his insides. His throat tightened. He didn’t know how he’d won her trust, but he vowed he would never, ever betray it.
Matty watched Sebastian holding the sleeping baby and her eyes moi
stened. When she’d helped him rearrange Elizabeth in his arms, she’d fought the almost overwhelming urge to wrap her arms around man and child, hugging them close. She longed to lay her head against Sebastian’s solid shoulder and create, if only for a moment, the precious family unit she’d dreamed of. God, how she ached.
She’d imagined this scene so many times, except in her fantasy Sebastian would be holding their baby. He’d gaze down at the tiny infant as he was doing now, and then he’d look up, speechless with wonder, love filling his gray eyes.
She couldn’t bear to have the fantasy ruined by whatever comment he might make, so she broke the mood herself. “Bring her in the bedroom,” she said as she started toward the back of the house. “I’ll empty out one of your dresser drawers. Then we can put a blanket in for her.”
“Use the bottom one,” he said. “It’s got some old sweaters and sweatshirts in it, and it’s the deepest.”
“Okay.” She walked into the bedroom, intent on her purpose until she saw the mussed sheets. Sebastian wouldn’t have left his bed unmade if he was having guests, which meant that the sheets had been disturbed after the guest arrived. She stood there looking at the rumpled bed and a knot of pure jealousy formed in her stomach.
Sebastian came in the room and glanced from Matty to the bed. “Nothing happened.”
Matty swallowed. “It’s not my business whether it did or not.” Jaw clenched, she stomped over to the dresser.
“Charlotte came in here when the doorbell rang.” He sounded defensive. “I guess she climbed in.”
“Goodness, I wonder why she’d do a thing like that?” Matty crouched down and pulled open the bottom drawer of the old pine dresser. She’d always loved Sebastian and Barbara’s bedroom furniture. They’d found it at a fleamarket in Canon City, and it had the aged look Matty thought was perfect for a ranch-house bedroom.
“There’s no need to get sarcastic.”
“You’re right. I apologize.” Matty was embarrassed by her violent reaction to the bedroom scene. She might as well announce to Sebastian that she was pea-green with envy. She started pulling his sweaters and sweatshirts out of the drawer and piling them in her arms. The scent of outdoors and citrus that always clung to Sebastian drifted up from the pile of clothes tucked in her arm. She wanted to bury her nose in the soft fabric.
The Colorado Kid Page 5