Married to a Brownsville Bully 3

by Jahquel J

  I nursed my vodka and sat in the back of the bar and watched the traffic. It wasn’t only a bar, but a place where people came to grab some food and have a drink together. There were areas where you could sit and eat, and then there was the infamous glass bar. I’ve always liked to sit back and chill in the background. Women came into the bar by the loads to secure a spot at the bar. The grandson was a Casanova and often left with a few of them at the end of the night. There has been a few women that had found me in the back and tried to have a conversation in exchange for sex.

  Golden’s call took my eyes from the crowd for a bit while I answered. “Yeah, babe?”

  “When are you coming home? I miss you.”

  “I’m going to have another drink and then I’ll be home. The kids good?”

  “Yeah. They are sleeping. Pit Pat came down to eat and she’s really hurt. Both she and Yolani need to sit down alone and talk.”

  “I understand that. She just needs to understand that she has to work on Yolani’s terms, not hers. We’re grown and have decisions we’ve made, so she has to respect them. Yolani opened up and told us something she had been hiding for years and the first thing she wants to do is go against what she’s asking her not to do.”

  “Pit Pat is used to her word being the final say. It’s going to take some getting used to before she understands that this isn’t up to her. How’s Yolani doing?”

  “She seemed stressed after Pit Pat barked on her. I’m gonna make sure I swing by there and check on her before I head home.”

  “Okay. Please drive safe.”

  “I’m not driving, but I’ll tell the driver.”

  “Okay. Love you.”

  “Love you too, Gold.”

  It was as if we hadn’t had an argument earlier. It didn’t make sense to hold grudges and stay out late, or have her pack up and leave. We were grown and could argue without breaking up or thinking shit was over. Long as she knew that I was going to handle Grand, we were straight. Golden was going to be my wife and I was too grown to play these little kid games that some niggas loved to play. If we mature enough to be fucking on each other then we’re mature enough to deal with the bad times too. It was too many niggas grown enough to fuck bitches, but not grown enough to deal with the emotional part of relationships. When I was younger, I may have been one of those niggas, but I’m a grown ass man with a family so I didn’t have time to have my woman leaving the crib and not making up with her because my pride was too big. Pride will have your ass sleeping in the house alone, knowing you wanted to be under your woman. My pride was big, but I also knew how to put that shit to the side and deal with shit head on.

  Just as I was about to get up, Eva walked into the bar with her girlfriends. She was rocking leather jacket that exposed her shoulders, jeans that looked painted on and thigh high boots. Her hair was freshly cut and I had to admit she was looking real good. The thing with Eva wasn’t that I wasn’t attracted to her. She was a fine ass woman that had her head screwed on straight. Had her own apartment, worked and was smart. All that clingy shit she pulled once Golden came into the picture turned me the fuck off. She wanted to move fast and that wasn’t what I was on. It was crazy that I told her I wasn’t ready for all of that and now was about to marry Golden soon with a baby. God was funny because he was telling me I wasn’t ready for all of that, but in reality, I wasn’t ready for all of that with Eva.

  “Hey Yoshon!” she smiled and hugged me.

  I kissed her on the cheek and hugged her back. “What’s good, Eva? How you been?”

  “I’ve been good. I’m moving to Atlanta next month so I’m celebrating with my girls before I leave.”

  “Oh, word? Why Atlanta?”

  “It’s too expensive here in the city. Plus, I got a higher position at a Wells Fargo bank there. I just closed on my townhouse out there.”

  “Word? Shit, I’m proud of you.”

  “Uh uh. The streets been talking. I heard you had a baby.”

  Here she go with the shit. Why was that even her concern? “Yeah, I had a little girl. I’m proud of what you’re doing. I’m ‘bout to head up out of here, good luck with everything and enjoy your night.”

  “Thank you.” We hugged again and I quickly dipped out. I wanted to leave peacefully before she got to asking about me and Golden. She didn’t need to know that me and her were about to be married and had a family together.

  “Boss, where you heading? Home.”

  “Nah, head to my sister’s crib.”

  “Will do.”

  The traffic tonight was light so we made it to Yolani’s house in under thirty minutes. I hopped out the car and knocked on the door. Big Ben opened the door and nodded at me. We hadn’t seen each other since he got out of prison. This man was the truth and the words ‘real one’ came to mind when his name was brought up. He took a charge and never opened his mouth once. With all the shit he knew, he could have brought down my operation and walked away from jail time. He was the small fish in the picture, and if they landed someone like me, he wouldn’t have done no jail time at all for snitching on us. Yet, he took his charge and only asked for his family to be taken care of. I always wondered why Yolani wanted to come out of her pocket to make sure his sister was well taken care of.

  First, I thought it was because they were good ass friends. After digging and seeing Yairo, I found out that my sister had a baby and didn’t tell anyone. Gina was the one who came out and told me. Yairo had to be a few months old and she was getting off the bus. I walked three blocks to her little apartment in the middle of the hood, and she fed me lie after lie about this baby being by her boyfriend. When I whipped out Yolani’s baby picture and showed her how much the baby in her stroller resembled Yolani, she broke down and told me. My first thought was to go the fuck off. After a bottle of rum and sitting in the dark, I decided to let her come and tell me. If I had known she would wait ten years, I would have addressed that shit soon as I found out.

  “Big fucking Ben, what’s good, son?”

  “Yoshon, what’s happening, my man?” we dapped each other and shared a brotherly hug. “I’m sorry I didn’t get up with you sooner.”

  “Nah, nah, don’t worry about that. You got out and handled responsibilities. I appreciate you for seeing the help Yolani needed and being the only one to get her the help.”

  “You paid for half of this shit she got here, so don’t thank me.”

  “Money is all I did. My sister needed help and I wasn’t there to make sure she got it. You did this, and I can stand here as a man and acknowledge you for that.”

  “You already know Yolani has a special part of my heart.”

  “Word? Don’t all baby mamas, though?”

  He looked away and then looked me in my eyes. “I was going to tell you, Yosh. So much was happening, and then I got knocked, so that shit wasn’t on my mind. Making sure my sister and son was straight was the first priority.”

  “Why didn’t you tell me? I could have made sure Yairo was straight.”

  “You did, though. The crib, money and paying my sister’s nursing school tuition.” He named shit that I had a hand in.

  “Just want to make sure my nephew gets a piece of the pie too.”

  “Facts. I respect you for that.”

  “Always. Where she at?”

  “In the living room watching Netflix. I was about to head up to sleep when you rang the doorbell.”

  “Bet. We’ll get up soon to discuss business.”

  “I’m ready whenever.” We dapped again and he headed upstairs. “Night, Lan.”

  “Night, Ben,” she called out of the living room.

  Following her voice, her eyes lit up when she saw me. “Who told you about this crazy ass show?”

  “Hazel told me to start watching it,” she chuckled. “What you doing here so late? Everything good?”

  “Yeah. I just wanted to check with you. We didn’t have a minute to talk because Pit Pat was ready to go.”

  �
�She still upset?”

  “You know she is.”

  “I don’t understand why she gotta be so difficult. This is my decision and I’m not budging on that shit either.”

  “I’m not asking you to. This is something that she is going to have to realize that she can’t change. Yairo is your son and whatever you decide is right for him, that’s what I’m rolling with.”

  “He’s Gina’s son,” she corrected me.

  “You had him. Gina raised him. As much as she does for him, she will never be his mother. She’s his aunt.”

  “Nah, I just had him, and she raised him. She’s his mother and that’s who he sees as his mother. It’s fine. I never wanted to be a mother and I would have had an abortion if it wasn’t too late.”

  In life, we had to realize just because a woman had the parts to become a mother, didn’t mean she wanted to be a mother. Yolani was that woman who didn’t want to be a mother and you could see it on her face. It hurt to give her son up and I could see that pain on her face too. She never wanted to be a mother and that was something she was set on letting me know.

  “Giving him up… was it hard?”

  “The hardest shit I’ve had to do in my life.”

  “Damn.”

  “Having him around would be too painful for me. It hurts when I think of all the time I’ve missed with him. He’ll be off to middle school soon and I don’t even know his favorite color or food.”

  “Why don’t you just bring him around and act like a friend? He doesn’t need to know that you’re his mother.”

  “You saw him lately? What kind of friend shares the same face as him? He’s going to be eleven, he’s not dumb, Yoshon.”

  “Keep with therapy. That shit will help you move on.”

  “I will. Ms. Brown too real for me to stop doing sessions with her.”

  “She’s the best in the business. I heard she’s tied to the mob or some shit.”

  “Damn, she do give me mob daughter vibes though.”

  “You heard about Hazel’s bridal shower?” Pit Pat said she knew and was fine with it. I also knew that Yolani didn’t tell Pit Pat everything and hid shit from her. It was their relationship since she was a child. Yolani would come to me when something was wrong because she knew I wouldn’t be dramatic or punish her for something she was feeling.

  “Yeah. She sent me a text and told me her cousin had told her. It was supposed to be a surprise and Alicia ruined the surprise by telling her.”

  “She excited?”

  “Nah, she don’t love him,” she nonchalantly replied as she started to flip through the different programs Netflix had to offer.

  “Why the fuck she married to him or getting married to him?”

  “She don’t want to give her child a broken family. Some shit like that she explained when she was over here the other day.”

  “That shit not gonna last.”

  “Yeah, I thought it and just didn’t tell her that.”

  “You want to get back with her and actually marry her now?”

  “Want to. I know I gotta let her see that she wants to be with me. Just because I’m clean, don’t mean she has to run back to me. I fucked it up, so I’m giving her time to make her marriage work.” She yawned and tossed the remote onto the couch next to her.

  “Hazel still little sis. I hope y’all can work it out, but I’m glad you both are at least talking.”

  “We talk every day. She calls me every morning on the house jack.”

  “Seem like you rebuilding the friendship y’all had before you both got together.”

  “Yep.”

  “Let me head to the crib. I just wanted to check on you and see if you were good. I’m tired as fuck and gotta get up to meet with some niggas in Philly.”

  “You big popping now,” she joked. “Proud of you.”

  “Appreciate it. I’m prouder of you.”

  “Thanks.”

  “Good night.” I kissed her on the forehead and headed out. “Head home,” I told the driver and laid my head back. A shower, pussy, and sleep was what I needed in that same order.

  12

  Golden

  I just knew me and Yoshon’s relationship was over when security snitched on me. The reason I never told him was because I wanted to handle this on my own. Yoshon did everything for us and for once, I wanted to be able to handle something on my own. Getting Grand to sign those papers meant that I was free. There was no tie to him any longer. Grand already knew not to ask for custody of our son. With the way he did me in front of Gyan, he was better off acting as if he didn’t have a son. It would be a cold day in hell before I allowed him to see or spend time with Gyan. He wasn’t thinking about his son when he locked me out of all his accounts and refused to give any money to help me with his son. It was his sister who came out of her pockets and helped us out. Now he had a little girlfriend, who he was trying to build a family with and wanted to be a father. He better head back to Virginia and find his other kids and play daddy to them.

  Yoshon forced me to go to this bridal shower. I had picked up a gift and had plans on shipping it out to her instead of attending. He told me that I needed to show up and represent for the family. Pit Pat said something about Hazel’s bitchy mother and she wanted me to be on my best behavior. Me and Hazel spoke occasionally on Facebook or Instagram when she liked a picture of Yaya I posted. When I first met her, she was cool as hell. Life happened and we just never linked back up to hang. She was cool people and that was the only reason I was in the car heading to this baby shower. Yoshon insisted that the driver bring me because we didn’t know what the parking would be like, and he didn’t want me to scratch his Tesla. I was still running his businesses and he paid me well, so I was saving my money for a rainy day.

  “We’re here, Mrs. Santana,” Larry, the driver, announced as we pulled up to this beautiful catering hall in Queens.

  “Larry, you do know I’m not married to Yoshon yet, right?”

  “Boss man told us to address you as such,” he chuckled. “That man is crazy over you, ma’am.”

  Smiling, he got out and helped me out the car. “I don’t expect to be here long.”

  “I’ll park out back and give me a ring when you’re ready,” he told me and I nodded. My Emilio Pucci peep toe heels hit the concrete and I made my way up the stairs in a strapless ivory jumpsuit. My hair was straightened and pulled into a high sleek ponytail. My make-up was soft with a pink lip that matched the pink in my shoes. When I came downstairs, both Gyan and Pit Pat’s mouths dropped. Yoshon had left out early to a meeting. Now that he had taken head of the cartel, he seemed to be busier these days.

  Upon entry, there were servers standing with the signature drink of the shower. Grabbing a drink, I headed into the hall. It was decorated in soft lavender and beige. It was beautiful and classical music was playing in the background. Black people never showed up to anything on time, so I was over an hour late when I arrived. To my surprise, there were a bunch of people already here. Hazel was already here. She was wearing a white bodycon dress with a sash that said wife on it. Her small belly was starting to pop out more. She could easily pass for being bloated, but I knew she was with child. She was having a conversation with a woman who resembled her, who I assumed was her mother.

  “Sorry to interrupt,” I smiled and touched Hazel on the shoulder. She turned around and smiled when she saw me. “Congratulations, mama.”

  “Thank you for coming!” she hugged me tightly.

  “Oh, I’ve never met you before,” the woman, who I assumed was her mother, butted in. Turning toward her, I smiled and shook her hand.

  “Hey, I’m Golden Santana.” The tight grip on my hand became loose when I announced my last name. Pit Pat told me to purposely say that when I met Hazel’s mother.

  “Oh, a Santana. Did Yoshon get married?”

  “Yes.” I flashed my huge ring and smiled just as bright as the diamond. “Hazel, please show me around.”

  “O
f course.” From her face, I could tell she was over this entire shower and wanted to leave as soon as she could.

  “Why you got that face?”

  “Because I don’t want to be here. Half these people I don’t even know and my cheek is killing me from smiling so hard. My draws are too tight because my butt got bigger.”

  “I could see in your face that you don’t want to be here.”

  “It’s funny how you see that, but my own mother doesn’t even see it,” she rolled her eyes. “These are all of her friends and co-workers. It was too last minute so some of our family couldn’t even make it. There’s some here, but not all of them.”

  “Your mother doesn’t like the Santana’s too much, huh?”

  “Yolani kind of gave her a bad taste for all of them. Have you heard from Yolani? She told me she was going out to lunch with Big Ben and I wanted to know how it went.”

  “Nope. I’m sure it went well. This is her first outing, so I know she enjoyed that.”

  “Soon as I’m done here, I’m going over there,” she revealed.

  “Girl, ain’t you married? You shouldn’t be worried about Yolani or anything that has to do with her.”

  “I still love her, Golden. I’m trying to make this work for everyone, and in the end, I feel like I’m losing myself,” her voice cracked. I spotted the bathroom so I pulled her into it and locked the door behind us.

  “What are you trying to make work? You being married to Denim and having his baby isn’t making it work for Yolani. She doesn’t need that to trigger any of the progress she has made. You have to think of her when you’re stringing her along, Hazel.”

  She must have been holding this in for a while because she broke down like no other. I patted her face, careful not to mess up her make up as I allowed her to get all the tears she needed out. I wasn’t sure how she was trying to make everything work for everyone else? She was married and celebrating her marriage with a stomach filled with Denim’s child. If she thought she and Yolani had a chance, she needed to end her marriage and work toward that. Instead, it seemed like she was moving full sail ahead with the marriage.