Sweet Silken Bondage

by Bobbi Smith

  11 'It,' Reina? You're talking about our son or daughter," Clay said persuasively.

  Bitterly, Reina realized how deeply she'd dug herself into this hole of lies and that the only way out of it was by telling him the complete truth. "Damnit! Why did you come out here, anyway? I didn't want this to happen!"

  "What are you talking about?" Clay feared she was growing despondent over her pregnancy.

  "I'm talking about my lies.. .all of them."

  "Lies? What lies?"

  "You want the truth, Clay? Well, here it is! I'm not pregnant, and I never was. I just made it up to get rid of Nathan, and it worked. The only thing that went wrong was that you got dragged into the middle of it."

  "You mean you lied about being pregnant? You're not carrying my child?"

  "That's right. So you can just go back to your saloon and celebrate. You don't have to marry anybody." She turned away from him, hoping that he would leave without another word.

  "What about this morning on the boat, and what about what your father told me on the ride out here from town? He said that you'd told him you loved me. Were you lying then?" Clay had to know the truth of her feelings. If she loved him, it didn't matter if she was pregnant or not. He loved her, and he wanted to make her his wife.

  "What do you think?" she bit out caustically. "As desperate as I was to keep from marrying Nathan, I was ready to try anything. I am my father's daughter, you know." She kept her back to him, so he couldn't see the hurt in her eyes. She wouldn't marry him just because he thought he was obligated to do it.

  Reina waited, her heart wishing and praying that he would take her in his arms and declare his love. She wanted him to sweep her off to the altar, telling her that it didn't matter if she was pregnant or not, that he loved her and that nothing else was important. Her mind, however, was telling her to prepare herself, because he was going to walk out and never come back. That he'd only come to her because he'd thought she was in trouble, and now that he knew she wasn't pregnant, he was going to go off on his merry way, without giving her another thought. The minutes ticked by as she waited to see what he would do next.

  Clay stared at her, seeing the stiffness and defiance in her stance, and nearly unbearable pain shot through him as he accepted her truth. She'd been lying. The whole thing had been a lie. She must have loved having him dancing to her tune this way. He'd made a damned fool out of himself, but he realized miserably that it really didn't matter. Nothing mattered right now. Nothing. He thought of his mother, and the cruelty she'd wreaked in his and his father's lives. It was a galling, agonizing comparison.

  "Yes," he finally said slowly, "you most certainly are a lot alike." And as he said it, he wasn't sure if he was comparing her to her father or to his mother. "How will you explain to your father that we're not going to marry?"

  "Don't worry about it. My father loves me. Now that he knows what kind of man Nathan really was, he'll understand when I tell him the truth."

  "I see," he replied tightly, the ache in his chest expanding to almost excruciating proportions. "Well, I'm glad everything worked out so well for you."

  "Yes, it has, and now that you know everything you can go on and go. I'm going to be just fine."

  "I'm sure you are, Reina."

  She heard him leave the room, and her tears began to flow. As his solitary footsteps echoed down the hall, she whispered, "Good-bye, Clay."

  Luis was in his bedchamber when he heard the sound of a rider on the drive. He frowned, wondering who'd left. He'd expected Clay to stay on so they could make the necessary arrangements in the morning. Curious, he left his room to find out what was going on.

  The sight of the study door standing ajar caused him to pause. He hurried forward to push it wider and found his beloved Reina, sitting in one of the leather wingchairs, crying brokenheartedly.

  "Reina! What's happened? Where's Clay?" he asked as he rushed to kneel before her.

  She raised tortured, tear-filled eyes to his. "He's gone."

  "Gone?" Luis was totally perplexed. "Where did he go?"

  "I sent him away."

  "You sent him away? Why?" Luis stared at her in bewilderment. "He did propose to you, didn't he?"

  "Yes," she managed in a choked voice, "but I turned him down."

  Now he was really baffled. "Why, in God's name did you turn him down? He wanted to marry you. He told me so."

  "He only wanted me because he thought I was pregnant, Father, and I didn't want him under those circumstances."

  Luis heard something in her words that troubled him. "Because he `thought you were pregnant'?" he repeated back to her.

  "Yes..." she confessed sorrowfully. "I'm sorry, I know I shouldn't have lied to you. I should have told you everything."

  "What are you talking about?"

  "The truth, Father. I'm not pregnant.. .or at least, I don't think I am," she admitted humbly.

  "You're not..." He digested that bit of surprising news slowly.

  "No. You see, I made it up because of Nathan ... of what he threatened to do to me."

  Though he was still a bit angry over her lie, this was the first he'd heard of any threats from Nathan. "Just what did Marlow threaten to do to you?"

  Reina quickly went on to tell him of his need to confirm her innocence before their marriage.

  "That son-of-a-bitch! It's a damned shame Clay didn't kill him while we were in town."

  "What?" she asked amazed.

  "Clay didn't tell you that he ran into Nathan at the Perdition Saloon?"

  "No."

  "It must have been quite a one-sided fight judging from the way Nathan looked when Clay got done with him."

  "Clay beat up Nathan?"

  "Soundly, and, in defense of your honor, I might add. He loves you very much, Reina."

  "No. He doesn't love me," she denied, not believing that it could be true.

  "I think you're wrong. He loves you. I'm sure of

  Her expression turned downcast again. "And I'm just as certain that he doesn't."

  "Why? After all he's done to prove to you that he does, why do you refuse to believe it?"

  "Because of this morning..."

  "What happened this morning?" he urged her to tell him what was bothering her.

  "It was right before you showed up at the boat to bring me home. I was scared. I didn't want to go to Nathan. I knew I couldn't marry him, feeling as I did about Clay, so I told Clay the truth. I told him that I loved him, and I begged him not to take me back to you, but it didn't matter."

  Luis's heart was breaking as he listened to her. Hearing the very real anguish in her voice he stood and drew her up from the chair into his warm, loving embrace. He soothed her, just as he had for all the years of her childhood, holding her close, enfolding her with his fatherly love.

  "Didn't he offer to explain?" he finally asked, when she'd calmed.

  "Explain? What was there to explain?" she countered heartbrokenly. "If he loved me, he would have done anything for me"

  "Sometimes, there are situations in life when things are not as simple as they appear. Did you give him a chance to tell you about his friend?"

  "He said there was a lot he wanted to explain to me, but I told him I didn't want to hear it."

  "I think you should hear it now...from me." Luis had the good grace to look a bit shame-faced. "I had more than a little to do with what happened this morning. Don't judge Clay too harshly."

  "I don't understand."

  "You will. You see, I was the reason Clay couldn't just tell you that he loved you and run off with you this morning. I had Clay trapped. He had to turn you over to me. There was nothing else he could do."

  At her questioning look, he went on.

  "When you first disappeared, I was frantic. At first, I searched everywhere myself, but when I couldn't find you, I became desperate. That was when I attempted to hire Clay to track you down. Initially, though, he refused me. He wanted no part of searching for a runaway girl. Even after I tol
d him that he could name his price, he was adamant."

  "So he didn't do it for money?"

  "No. Obviously, money isn't very important to the man."

  This thrilled Reina, but she still didn't understand what had forced him to take the job. "If it wasn't the pay, then why did he finally agree to do it?"

  "He forced me to become more inventive in finding a way to `encourage' him to take the job."

  "What did you do?" She knew her father, and she was horrified as she realized what lengths he'd gone to, to get Clay to bend to his will.

  "The details aren't important," Luis glossed over his more dastardly deeds, and Reina knew better than to ask. "The important thing was that his friend, Dev, was in jail. He'd been arrested, accused of Pedro Santana's murder, and he looked to be pretty guilty. I made it my business to personally assure Clay that his friend would be safe in jail, but only if he agreed to locate you and bring you home."

  "You blackmailed him!"

  "Yes, I did," he told her, not at all proud of his actions now.

  Reina was amazed as she began to see Clay's words and actions in a whole new light. He couldn't save her from her father because he was afraid his friend would die. Her heart sang as she realized that he really might love her.

  "He told you he loved me?" she asked, needing to hear it confirmed again.

  "When I found him at the saloon, shortly after his fight with Nathan, he told me he was just on his way out here to see you. On the ride here, when I tried to persuade him, in a not so subtle fashion, to do the right thing by you, he got very angry. That was when he told me that he didn't need to be coerced into marrying you. That he had loved you from the first time you met."

  "Clay really said that?" Her eyes were still brimming with tears, but they were tears of happiness now.

  "Yes, he did. He loves you, Reina, and he's a fine man...a man of honor."

  "I know ...Oh, yes, I know," she told him, a happy laugh bubbling up inside of her. "Father, I have to go after him! I have to find him quickly and tell him I'm sorry!"

  Luis chuckled as she moved out of his embrace. "Get dressed then, while I have the carriage brought around."

  "I don't want the carriage! That's too slow! Have them bring my horse. I've got to get to Clay as fast as I can."

  "It is the middle of the night, you know."

  Reina flashed her father a triumphant smile as she headed for the doorway on her way to her room to get dressed. "Would the lateness of the hour have stopped you from going after Mother, had she left you?"

  "No," he answered, remembering how he'd felt about his dear wife.

  "Then how can you expect me to sit here and wait for a suitable hour? I am your daughter, you know."

  "Yes, Reina, my love, you are my daughter."

  With a light-hearted laugh, she raced from the room, leaving her father smiling happily behind her.

  Clay sat at a table in the nearly deserted Perdition, an open bottle of bourbon and a half-empty glass before him. Reina had lied. Everything had been a lie...The words kept tumbling through his mind, taunting him, scalding him with the white-hot truth ...the truth that had been burned into his consciousness by his mother long ago and that he should never have forgotten.

  He realized now that he'd been wrong to ever have imagined things could be different. There was only one kind of woman that could be trusted, and that was a woman like Frenchie or Josie. They, at least, were honest and upfront about their motives. You paid ahead of time in cold, hard cash, and you got exactly what you paid for. Involvement with them didn't cost you your very soul as it did with women like his mother or Reina.

  Clay felt isolated. It was difficult enough dealing with Reina's deception, but now he didn't even have Dev. He thought of home, of his father. He understood then that they were far more alike than he'd thought. For all his vows that what happened to his father wouldn't happen to him, it had.

  The recognition of his weakness was not a soothing one, and he took another stiff drink. As he downed the liquor, he thought it odd that he'd been sitting there, trying to drink himself to forgetfulness for the better part of an hour, and he had yet to feel any effects from his efforts. Reina still dominated his thoughts ...Reina and his love for her. It irritated him. He poured another glass.

  Frenchie had been surprised when Clay had returned to the saloon that same night. She hadn't expected to see him again so soon. She'd figured he'd be on his way to the altar with the rich Alvarez girl by now, and she found herself wondering if something had gone wrong. The temptation to approach him was powerful, but his earlier coolness kept her waiting at the bar.

  "What do you think, George?" she asked the bartender quietly. "Think I should go talk to him?"

  George turned pale. "I wouldn't mess with that man, if I were you, Frenchie. He's a hard one, and he looks plumb mad to me."

  She glanced over at Clay, seeing the hard set of his jaw and the tense line of his body that was not betrayed by the way he was sitting slumped in his chair.

  "You always were a coward," she told him with a soft laugh. "I like Clay, and I'm going to find out what's going on" Taking her own drink with her, she moved off across the room to come stand beside Clay. When he didn't look up right away, she slid into the chair opposite him. Her greeting was a sultry, "Hi, Clay."

  "Hello, Frenchie," he answered distractedly, his thoughts preoccupied.

  "You're looking lonely, sitting here all by yourself. You want some company?"

  Clay was of a mind to decline, but then thought better of it. Frenchie was a good-hearted woman. He knew what was on her mind. "Sure, why not?"

  She leaned forward, giving him a clear view of her cleavage as she spoke. "Is everything all right with you? The way you rushed out of here before with old man Alvarez, I kinda thought we'd seen the last of you."

  Clay forced a smile. "I'm fine. Why?"

  "You look a little down, is all, but I'm glad there isn't anything troubling you."

  "Not a thing," he lied. "Want a drink?"

  "Sure." She held out her glass while he poured her a healthy shot. She took a drink, then gave him a flirtatious smile. "Good stuff, I like your taste in liquor."

  "Thanks."

  "I like you, too, Clay." Frenchie paused, her eyes meeting his, letting him read there exactly what she was wanting. They had had a good time together all those weeks ago before he'd left town, and she was eager to have him back in her bed again. "You want to bring the bottle and come upstairs with me? We could have some fun..."

  Clay wanted to go upstairs, but he wanted to go to his own room, alone just him and his bottle of bourbon. He liked Frenchie, but Reina was the only woman he desired. In spite of everything, he still loved her. There would be no point in trying to erase her memory with another woman. He knew without even trying that it wouldn't work.

  "I think I'll go on up, but I'm going alone, Frenchie," he told her affectionately. "You're a gorgeous woman, but tonight I just need to be by myself." He pushed his chair back and stood up.

  "You sure?"

  "I'm sure." He picked up his bottle and glass and started to leave.

  Frenchie wasn't about to let him go that easily. She got up, too, and grabbed his arm when he would have moved off.

  "Good night, Clay," she said as she looped her arms around his neck and planted a warm kiss on his lips.

  Clay accepted her embrace. He felt no rousing passion, no driving need. When she let him go, he gave her a sweet-sad smile.

  "Good night, Frenchie." With that, he headed up the stairs to his rented room.

  The saloon girl watched him mount the steps, thinking it might be worth her effort to wait a few minutes and then go knock on his door. Worst that could happen would be that he'd tell her good night again.

  Reina rode like the wind through the starlit early morning hours. Her heart was pounding excitedly as she anticipated seeing him again and telling him that she loved him. The miles melted away as she gave her horse full rein. She knew
she was driving her mount hard, but she didn't care. Only Clay was important now... only Clay.

  When the lights of Monterey appeared ahead of her, she was thrilled. Soon, they would be together! Soon, she would tell him the truth and everything would be fine.

  Her father had told her that Clay had taken a room at the Perdition Saloon, and so she rode directly there. She knew she was going to have to be brazen to enter the place. Lord knows, ladies of her stature in the community did not frequent these types of establishments, but she knew the prize waiting for her there was worth it.

  Reina reined in before the saloon and slipped from the saddle. She was trembling as she hurried toward the entrance. As she neared the swinging doors, she paused, wanting to get a look inside before she went rushing in. As she peeked over the top of one door, she gasped. There in the middle of the room stood Clay, and one of the saloon girls was kissing him!

  Anger seared her. But it was not anger with Clay, it was anger with herself. It was all her fault that he was kissing someone else. She'd driven him to it. She'd be damned, though, if she was going to let that other woman have him. Clay was hers!

  A hideous prospect penetrated her indignation. She might claim Clay as hers, but what if he didn't want her? She almost wouldn't blame him, after all the trouble she'd caused him, but she intended to make it up to him, just as soon as they talked and straightened everything out.

  Reminding herself that Clay had told her he loved her when he'd proposed, bolstered Reina's confidence. She glanced inside again, just in time to see Clay disappear upstairs, alone. The saloon girl was watching him from the foot of the steps.

  Reina wasn't sure if his going upstairs ahead of the girl was good or bad. Was he really going to bed for the night or was he expecting her to follow him a little later? She wasn't sure how these things were arranged by men in this type of situation. When she saw the girl start up the steps after him a moment later, she knew she wasn't going to wait around to find out. If Clay wanted a woman, he was going to get one-Her! Assuming her proudest, most arrogant manner in the hopes that no one would dare interfere with her, Reina walked right on into the saloon.