by B. M. Hardin
Of course we’d found the perfect house to purchase with the money that I’d gotten from Patrice. Everything was packed and even the things that we’d had in storage had been sitting in the living room for the last two days, waiting for the movers to come and take it over to our new place.
I started to go through some of the boxes. Especially those that had most of Eddie’s things in them. I wasn’t looking for anything in particularly. But you never know what you might come across if you actually go looking. I came across some old photos. Some of them were from when we’d first started dating. We looked so happy. I was smiling as though I’d hit the jackpot and I was holding on to Eddie as though I was afraid to let him go. Eddie looked genuinely happy standing beside me. And I’m sure that he was.
I smiled as I looked at the wedding photos; the ones from over ten years ago. I could see nothing but love in Eddie’s eyes. But even I seemed to be so happy but it was nothing more than a painted smile. I was scared. I was terrified of the future. And in my mind, I knew that I’d just made a huge mistake. But yet I smiled. I smiled as though I didn’t have a care in the world, but behind that smile, I wanted to cry.
After glancing at Eddie in the photo once more, something made me look over at the face of his best man’s…Polo. I noticed that he wasn’t smiling. He didn’t crack a smile in one single picture. I never noticed that before. I also noticed the look of disgust that seemed to be on Patrice’s face in a few of them. I put the pictures away and kept digging up memories. I came across my senior year high school yearbook. I smiled at the photos of Patrice and I. I till you, we just knew that we were the shit back then. Patrice had refused to go to a charter school, even though her family had money. She’d always wanted to go to school with me. She’d always said that she just wanted to be a normal kid.
I beamed at our senior photos. We were young and boy was I sexy. I remembered thinking that I had my whole life ahead of me as I walked across that stage. I was ready for the world and I just wanted to be great.
At that moment I felt like I’d wasted a lot of time. I felt as though my whole life had passed me by without me actually living and enjoying it. But it was time to start. The thoughts of happily ever after almost made me not want to continue investigating Eddie. I had more than enough money now to do anything that I wanted to do. I could finally see the world. I could finally try new things and never have to worry about bills or whether or not I had enough money or not. I could finally live a life like Patrice did. The life that I’d always envied.
I should just be thankful, grateful for all of life’s second chances instead of trying to find a reason to second guess.
Though I was deep in thought about completely forgetting about it all, I picked up Eddie’s senior photos and his yearbook. I swear he still looked the same. He was still as handsome today as he was twenty years ago. I opened his yearbook to look at him and Polo senior pictures. They were even voted Most Likely to remain Best Friends of their senior class nominations. You could just tell that they were as close as two butt cheeks just by looking at the photo. For some reason as I studied it, Eddie seemed to be the weird and sneaky one, whereas Polo seemed to be the one that was calm, cool and collected.
The lies a photo could tell.
I started to close the book but taking one last glance at the page, something caught my eye.
Stella.
I saw that on the same page “Class Clown” of Eddie’s senior class went to a girl named Stella Jackson.
I flipped to find her senior picture.
She was cute and actually she looked just like the girl, her younger sister, from the grocery store that revealed to me that Eddie had paid her sister to put the drugs in my purse.
I went to search the back of the book. I wanted to see if she had signed it or left some type of comment like most seniors do.
She had.
Hey Eddie,
My favorite guy! We had a heck of a year huh? Anyways see you later. And maybe even forever. XOXO, Stella.
So they’d dated maybe? In high school?
He’d never mentioned her to me, ever, so if they were still in contact, why wouldn’t he?
And how had he convinced her to do what she had done to me?
I wondered if I should mention her to Eddie, but I decided that there wasn’t any reason to. He probably wouldn’t tell me the truth about her anyway. Whatever I wanted to find out, I was going to have to find it on my own.
I closed the box and instead of going through another one, I headed to take a seat.
Sassi, just let it be. Move on. Be happy. The past is the past.
Internally, I coached myself to stop looking for trouble because if trouble wanted to find me, I was sure that it would. It damn sure had never gotten lost on its way to my house before.
Just as I’d convinced myself that I was done playing detective, a private number called my phone and I was sure that it was probably Polo.
He didn’t bother me all the time, not like he used to, but every now and then he would call and say he just needed to hear my voice. I was past seeing it as strange. Polo was strange.
Point. Blank. Period.
Even though I knew I should probably stop answering his calls, I always answered them anyway.
“Hello?”
“So if I know you, and I do, you’re hunting for Vanessa,” she said.
Micki.
I couldn’t believe that it was her.
No one had seen or heard from her since she up and disappeared.
“Where are you?”
“Living.”
“You drop a bomb on me and just disappear.”
“You needed closure.”
“Closure? Your confession didn’t give me closure at all. It’s been driving me crazy if anything trying to find answers.”
“You need answers? I have those. But you have had them all along. You just don’t know it.”
What did she mean by that?
“So it wasn’t a dream?”
“No.”
“And there really is a Vanessa?”
“Yes.”
“And the pregnancy. Did I just happen to lose the baby or did someone do something to me?”
“You know Polo has connections with pills and pharmacies. Remember, he got those pills for Eddie? Who knows where he got the pills from. Anyway, he gave you something to make you lose the baby while you were passed out. You even woke up a little as he put the pill in your mouth and put water behind it to make you swallow it. He had to make you pass out again. Do you remember? You woke up for just a second. Remember?”
What! He did what? And hell no I didn’t remember it! I didn’t remember anything other than the very beginning until I woke up again.
“My guess is that he’d learned a few tricks from some woman that he used to screw to assist with you passing out and all. I’ve heard that there are certain pressure points that can do that you know,” she said. “ And as for the pill that he gave you, I guess it was like some kind of abortion pill or something. You know they make those these days. Times have surely changed. They ran out and replaced the tests and all of the good stuff. To make it look like a dream. If you couldn’t prove that you were awake, they could surely plant the proof to make it look like you were dreaming.”
You have got to be kidding me!
“Why?”
“Why was it done? Or why am I telling you now?”
“Both,” I said.
“Well, some secrets are meant to be kept and you are just a little too nosey for your own good. You’ve always been that way. And why did I tell you, well, you know I never could hold water. I know your husband better than you do. And I also know you, better than you think. I know you well enough to know that you are there about to mess up your marriage because I opened my big mouth and told you that you weren’t dreaming. Maybe that was my mistake. I always did talk too much. I think that’s why you liked me. I would say the things that you wouldn’t say. And do the thin
gs you were afraid to do. But if I know you, and I do, you are digging and you shouldn’t be Sassi. You are safe with Eddie. He loves you. And he would never let anything happen to you. He has a past, but don’t we all? I do. You do. Everyone does. Let it go and be happy.”
“You are one to be giving out marital advice,” I said slyly.
“It’s no secret that I wanted the money. I was running out of options and real love was running away from me. I saw an opportunity and I took it. But I got the money. I’m gone now, and I’m never coming back. I was supposed to be leaving a little while ago anyway.”
“Why? Why were you supposed to be leaving?”
“That’s neither here nor there. Just know that I had to go and I’ll never be coming back Sassi. But you have a chance at new beginnings. Digging around will only hurt you in the end. Just let it go and be happy. For once just be happy. That’s what I plan to do.”
I was going to take her advice, but since she was on the phone, there was one thing that I just had to ask her. I needed to know just one thing.
“Okay, say I take your advice. Say I stop looking. Will you tell me one thing. Who is she?”
“Who Vanessa?”
“Yes. That’s all I want to know. And I’ll leave it all alone. Who is she?” I asked Micki again.
“Sassi. She was my sister,” Micki said and with that, she was gone.
Wait a minute…what!
****************************
Chapter 7
Now that I was sure that Eddie, Polo and Micki had been lying to me, I had the worst attitude ever! I tried not to. I tried to let it go but it was so hard!
I didn’t want Eddie to touch me. I barely had two words to say to him on most days. All I could think about was that he was a liar and that he was hiding this Vanessa woman from me for a reason, and I wanted to know why.
Replaying Eddie’s comments to Polo that day over and over again in my head, I could only assume that this Vanessa woman was dead and the fact that Micki said “was” confirmed it.
Did Polo kill her?
Did he kill her for Eddie?
And if so, how did Micki find out? Well, if it was her sister she would know that she was dead, but why wouldn’t she tell me about her? And why would they all be trying to keep it a secret?
“Hey baby,” Eddie said as I shut my laptop.
I was trying to give him a fake smile but it was hard for me not to pretend that I wasn’t bothered.
“What’s wrong with you?”
“Nothing.”
“Give me some shugga’.”
I stared at him.
“See, there is something wrong. What are you…”
“No Eddie. I’m not cheating if that’s what you were going to ask. I’m not doing anything. I would never hurt you again.”
“Well what is it?”
“I just have some questions,” I mumbled.
Eddie exhaled loudly.
“You told me you that didn’t know a Vanessa,” I started.
“What? Here we go with this again bull crap Sassi,” Eddie said in disgust.
“Who is she?” Just tell me who she is? I know that I wasn’t dreaming that night.”
He stuttered for a second but quickly pulled himself together.
“I don’t know a Vanessa.”
“Well do you know a Stella?”
I saw fear in Eddie’s eyes, but he sat right there and lied anyway.
“No.”
Liar!
“Really? She signed you yearbook and from the looks of it you guys were close.”
“My yearbook? From 20 years ago Sassi? Really? And now that you mentioned it, yes, I went to school with a Stella. Haven’t seen her in years. We were friends. Well, not really friends, but friendly. Stop looking for something to be wrong Sassi. You’ve always been nosey. One day you are going to stick your nose in business where it doesn’t belong and someone is going to knock it the hell off.”
Whatever. I wasn’t all that nosey. Not all the time anyway.
Eddie walked off and yelled for me to follow him but I ignored him.
I opened my laptop again instead.
If only I could find out what happened to Vanessa…
~***~
Eddie grunted and released himself inside of me.
Sex between us was still better than it had been in years and now that sex was no longer an issue, I’d found plenty more things that concerned me about him.
Maybe I was the only one that noticed, but Eddie was still a little odd. He wasn’t the same man as he had been before the affair between Polo and I. I always found myself watching him. The way that he talked, walked, and even down to the way he dressed. He just seemed different.
I would have liked to have taken Micki’s advice and just let it all go and leave whatever it was in the past, but I just couldn’t stop thinking about it. I’d tried calling her old number back, but of course it was disconnected and being that she’d called me private, I had no way to reach her.
And Vanessa was her sister?
How?
I’d always known Micki to be the oldest of three siblings.
Micki was from out of town and moved here in her teens with her grandmother once her mother passed away. Her other two siblings had the same father, and they had gone to live with their dad, so she had stayed around, with little family, even after her grandmother was long gone.
Patrice and I had been friends, first, since we were roughly twelve years old. She was the sister that I’d never had. As we got older, and because Patrice was into everything, anything that her father could stick her in; girl scouts, cheerleading, gymnastics, she’d done it all, she always met other friends. It was her father’s way of keeping her busy, her mind off of losing her mother too I suppose.
One summer at summer camp, Patrice met Micki. Her and Micki became close and as the summer ended, they stayed in touch, and then Patrice introduced me to Micki. I tried to remember exactly when, but I was thinking that I we were all around sixteen years old then when Micki officially became a “best friend” too.
Ever since then, she’d been around and until here lately, she had been nothing but loyal. She’d always had my back and she’d always been there for me to count on in a loud, crazy sort of way, but nevertheless, she’d always been right there.
So if Vanessa was her sister, that would have meant that she was older than Micki and must have died before Patrice and I had met her.
But how?
And why hadn't anyone ever mentioned her before?
Micki had never, not even once, mentioned her and there were no pictures of her, anywhere that I’d ever been with Micki.
I found that more than strange.
If this Vanessa woman was her real sister, than why did she and everyone pretend like she didn’t exist?
As Eddie started to snore, I entertained my thoughts a little more. There had to be some twisted situation involving all of them and the truth to the matter was that it was probably in my best interest if I didn’t know about it.
Unable to sleep, I left Eddie to rest and tip-toed out of our huge bedroom. We were in the new house now, and it was beautiful. It was my dream home and it was more than I’d ever imagined that it’d be. The boys loved all of the space and Eddie was looking forward to making tons of new memories here. But it was just so hard for me to focus on forever when I had so much more on my mind.
It was late summer, so I headed outside.
It was two o’clock in the morning, but it was still hot and sticky. I tightened my robe and took a seat. I looked around at all of the beautiful, gigantic houses that belonged to our new neighbors. I hadn't had the pleasure of meeting any of them yet, but I was looking forward to. I was going to enjoy meeting new people and even possibly making new friends. Hell, I had two friendship slots currently available anyway.
Thinking about Patrice, I wondered if she knew about Vanessa too. I was willing to bet that she did. They all seemed to know more th
an enough about each other and no one ever bothered to tell me.
What was with all of the secrecy?
The headlights stole my attention and immediately, my gut told me that the headlights belonged to one of Polo’s cars.
I was right.
He turned off his lights and creeped past my house, not knowing that I was sitting there on the porch, watching him. Once he made it to the stop sign and the end of the street, he sat there for a long while.
I wished that I hadn't left my phone inside of the house. I would have taken that risk of calling him just so that I could tell him to take his stalking ass home and go to bed. After a few more minutes, finally, he flicked back on his lights and he made a turn.
I watched his car until it was out of sight. I thought about Polo and the things that he’d said. He’d said that he’d always watched me. Even when I didn’t know it, he’d said that he’d always watched me.
How could anybody be that obsessed over someone yet not only help their best friend marry her the first time around, but then go away in hopes of helping his best friend marry the same woman of his dreams…again?
It just didn’t make sense.
Sure he cared about him, but if he loved me that much, why was he so willing to let Eddie have me? There had to be something more.
Why couldn’t I see it? Why couldn’t I figure it out?
Shaking away my thoughts, I headed back inside. But just as I shut the door, I noticed lights coming down the road again, and just like last time, just as he approached the house, Polo turned them off. I watched Polo slowly creep by again as I locked the door and headed back to lie in bed beside of Eddie. For some strange reason, and as crazy as it might sound, a part of me felt just a little safer, knowing that Polo was always somewhere watching.
But the other part of me knew that there had to be another reason why.
~***~
I sat in the car and looked at Mama and Patrice’s lawyer head into a restaurant. The same restaurant that I’d just ordered take-out from. They were hand and hand and he’d even patted her on the booty while she smiled.
Mama was dating Patrice’s lawyer?
Since when?