by B. M. Hardin
I wondered if he had been the one that she was servicing with her mouth, more or less, that day that I’d popped up at her house.
Why wouldn’t she tell me that she was dating him?
Had they been dating before or after Patrice died?
He’d certainly never mentioned even knowing my mother during our visits for him to read the Patrice’s will.
Hmmm…
I called Eddie to let him know that I was on my way home with the food. I was hoping that he found something to get his hands into soon because we definitely needed some kind of space or outlets from each other on a daily basis. He was getting on my last nerve and I knew that I was getting on his, though I knew exactly were my impatience and frustration was coming from.
Instead of calling Mama and asking her a hundred questions, I pulled off and headed down the road towards my house. I pulled up just in time to see a black car pulling off. I didn’t recognize it and I couldn’t see who was driving it as they drove away.
“Eddie who was that?” I asked walking into the house.
“Who was who?”
“Outside? In the black car that just left?”
Eddie grabbed the food out of my hands.
“I don’t know babe. What they say? Were they here? At our house?”
“Yes. They pulled off as I pulled up.”
“Oh. They didn’t come here. Maybe they had the wrong address or something,” he said taking a bite of his food.
Humph.
Here lately, I didn’t believe a word that Eddie said and I was starting to rethink my decision. My husband didn’t feel like was my husband at all.
Had he planned on remarrying me again all along?
Was all of this some kind of plan or set up?
Did I make the mistake and marry the wrong husband…again?
~***~
“Meet me,” I said to Polo.
“Where?”
I tried to think of somewhere simple; somewhere where it would seem as though we just happened to run into each other instead of sneaking around to meet without Eddie’s knowledge or permission.
“Hell, the grocery store I guess. I’ll be there in ten minutes,” I said to Polo.
I hung up, erased the private call and headed to the backyard.
“Get in the pool with us babe,” Eddie said.
He was now sitting on the edge of it. Eddie could swim like a fish and looking at the water dripping off of his body, I thought about what Polo had told me about Eddie saving his life and keeping him from drowning.
“Okay, but after I run to the store to get some steaks for the grill,” I said to Eddie.
“Oh, steaks would be good. Get some shrimp too,” he said.
I blew him a kiss and he caught it with a smile.
Bastard.
I still loved him, sure, but he couldn’t fool me. I didn’t have to be a genius to know that he was going the extreme to make sure that whatever he was hiding, stayed hidden.
I just wanted the truth. Was that too much to ask for?
I sped to the grocery store. Polo was already there and once I started to head in, he got out of his car and followed a small distance behind me. I headed to the meat section and he walked up.
“Hey beautiful.”
Oh my. I accidentally blushed.
“I found out who Vanessa is, or was, or whatever,” I said to him.
“Oh really?” he said.
Wait a minute.
My mind started to wonder. I was doing all of this confiding in Polo, when he was obviously in on it all and lying to me too. And on top of all of that, he could be telling Eddie every single thing that I told him. After all, they were loyal to each other before they were loyal to anyone else.
I’d learned that the hard way.
“You know what, never mind. You probably tell him everything I tell you anyway,” I said to Polo, grabbed a few steaks, and turned to walk away.
But Polo grabbed my arm.
“No. I don’t. I don’t,” Polo said looking into my eyes.
Maybe he didn’t. Probably because he often told me things that he wasn’t supposed to tell me anyway.
“You lied to me Polo.”
“Sometimes I have to.”
“Well, what happened to her? Did you kill her or something? And she’s Micki’s sister? Or she was? Like who is this woman?”
“What? Uh…wait did you say something about Micki? Who told you that she was Micki’s sister?”
“I’ve been doing some digging,” I lied.
He looked like he didn’t believe me. I could tell that he had his guard up but I could also tell that he was about to tell me something that I probably didn’t want to hear.
“If I tell you that I killed her will you leave it alone? Well, I guess I just did,” Polo said.
What? He killed her?
“You killed who? Vanessa? You’re saying that you killed her Polo? Like actually killed her? Why? Was it for Eddie?”
“No and it’s something that I’m not proud of. It was an accident. Now that is the truth. Let it go okay and just be happy with Eddie and the kids and stuff,” Polo said.
I still felt like there was more to the story and I wanted it all.
“So Eddie knows this?”
“Of course.”
“Why did you do it?”
“It was an accident.”
“Why didn’t you go to jail?”
“It was an accident.”
“Who was she? To Eddie?”
“They kind of dated back in the day.”
“How did she die?”
“I accidentally backed up as she was walking behind the car. The bump knocked her down and her head hit the pavement. She died.”
Hmm…
Sounded like bullshit to me!
“Why are you lying?”
“I’m not lying. I accidentally killed Vanessa.”
“What’s her last name so I can look it up for myself.”
“What? You don’t need her last name. I’m telling you who she is and what happened to her right now.”
“Why were you denying it at first? Why did you all keep it a big secret? Why wouldn’t Micki tell me something like that had happened to her sister? Why did you try to make it like I was dreaming?”
“Because you shouldn’t even know about her in the first place. You should stop being so nosey.”
“So I keep being told that lately.”
“As I told you before, some things in the past Sassi are meant to stay there. For your own good. For your own safety. It’s over and done with. I told you the truth. I killed her, accidentally. Not Eddie.”
“Why Polo?”
“I just told you it was an accident.”
There was more to it. I could feel it in my bones.
“And she was Micki’s sister?”
“Huh? Oh. Yeah. She was. Yes.”
“So everyone knew this the whole time but me?”
“Yes.”
“And so I hadn't been dreaming at all?” I asked, already knowing the answer but just to clarify.
Polo breathed.
“No.”
“You knocked me out?”
“Yes.”
“And you made me take some kind of pill to kill the baby?”
“Yes.”
Well, at least he was finally being honest.
“And Eddie let you do this to me?”
“Yes. You woke up, looked me right into the eyes as I put the pill in your mouth and the water to get it done your throat. I had to knock you out again. Eddie was going crazy knowing that you were pregnant. He knew before you even took the test. He said that he could just tell. He’d found the pregnancy test days before you took it. He couldn’t have handled you having a baby by his best friend. Even if it was his, in his mind, he was convinced that it was mine. It was wasn’t it?” Polo asked.
I was still trying to sort out my thoughts but I answered him anyway.
“Probably.
Possibly. I’d had sex with Eddie too. Only days a part,” I said ashamed.
“Well, it was for the best. Eddie and I have a strong bond, but that would have been a lot to bounce back from and besides a baby meant that you and him wouldn’t have been able to work it out and move forward. Well, if the baby was mine. And I just wouldn’t have been able to live with myself knowing that I’d let my ways and my wants ruin my brother’s marriage,” he said.
Polo was different too. Still weird, but yet different.
It was as though he’d somewhat matured overnight or something. As if he wasn’t as crazy as he’d always seemed. Or it could have been that he really did care more about Eddie and his happiness, than he cared about his own. Whatever it was, it was almost as though Eddie had changed in a way that made me somewhat uncomfortable and suspicious. And Polo seemed to have changed in a way that made me want to know a little more about this mysterious side to Polo that Eddie told me about; which didn’t seem so bad at all.
“You asked about Vanessa, so I just told you about Vanessa. Now you can move on Sassi.”
I felt overwhelmed all of a sudden. My mind was racing and I remembered something else that I wanted to ask.
“Did you kill that woman? In the hit and run? The woman that told me that you had taped us having sex. Did you kill her too? For telling me?”
Polo shook his head.
“No.”
“Then who did? If you didn’t do it, did you pay someone else to do it or something?”
“No.”
“Then who did it then? I’m sure that it wasn’t just a coincidence.”
Polo exhaled.
“This is a stupid question.”
“So you do know something then? About the accident?”
“Ugh! Why do you feel the need to want to know everything Sassi?”
“It’s a simple question. I just want to know the truth of what’s going on around me and how the people around me are involved. Do you know who hit her or not?”
“Fine. If you insist. It was Micki.”
What?
“She hit her. She wasn’t paying attention to the road. She hit her, panicked and drove away. I saw the whole thing because I had been following her. Not Micki, Katrina was her name. One of my sex buddies. She knew that I was heated about her running her mouth to you and she wouldn’t take any of my calls. I was following her to confront her and I saw the accident. I saw Micki hit her, get out of the car to check on her and then drive away. You want to know my involvement? I helped Micki out a little by wiping her prints from the door handle where she’d opened the door, and by cleaning up pieces left behind by the car that she was driving. I owed her a favor anyway.”
“What kind of favor?”
“It’s not important.”
“Micki wasn’t too fond of you so what kind of favor? I thought that you were the one that had done a favor for her and you wanted her to repay you with ass. She told me about whatever it was between you two.”
“Trust me. There was nothing real between Micki and I. Ever. I was always looking for someone to replace what I feel for you, but trust me, I never looked for it in Micki.”
My head was starting to hurt.
“But you did with Patrice?”
“Nope, that one time we came to dinner was just to piss you off like I said.”
“So that’s why Micki wanted to leave town? So nothing comes back on her for what she did?”
“I guess. Whatever you say.”
“And you covered up everything on Micki’s behalf?”
“Like I said, I took care of everything so the police will never know who caused the fatal hit and run. And since there was no evidence, I doubt that they are still looking.”
I thought back.
“I don’t remember Micki’s car being wrecked.”
“People only remember what they want to remember. Or maybe she made it her business to stay away. Until her car was fixed at least.”
Hell, there was no way I could remember how long after the hit run that I’d seen Micki again, so I wasn’t even going to try to calculate time and dates to try to convince myself that Polo was really telling the truth. I guess I just had to take his word for it.
“I just find it funny that she’d said that you’d tried to do things to her, crazy things, and then you turnaround and help her cover up something like that.”
“I didn’t do anything to Micki. So, I don’t know what you’re talking about. I think you tend to think I’m a little crazier than I actually am. I have my ways, but I’m not crazy. I’m a lot of things, but I’m not crazy.”
That depends on his definition of the word. In my mind, he was off and always had been.
“So I guess Micki stayed for her share of the money that we got from the will. The same day she got the money was the day that she left.”
Polo shrugged.”
“And you didn’t kill Patrice did you?”
“Hell no.”
“I just thought I would ask.”
“Well, I just gave you your answer.”
“You’ve been lying all of this time just like everybody else. Why did you tell me all of this now?”
“To give you a peace of mind. Like I said, I love you Sassi. By now I know that you won’t repeat what I tell you, so now that you have what you need, just be happy. More than anything, I want what’s best for you. What’s best for Eddie.”
“And what about what’s best for you?”
“I’ll figure it out. I always do.”
Polo turned to walk away but I grabbed his hand. I hoped that this time he was really being honest with me. I hoped that the things that he’d said were the truth so that I could process them and figure out my next moves.
“Thank you,” I said to him.
Polo turned around and without hesitating he kissed me.
“I’ll never be too far away,” he said and he took one of the steaks out of my head and headed on his way.
I stood there and watched him until he was out of sight.
No I couldn’t be with him because he was my husband’s best-brother-friend. Or whatever he was. No I couldn’t be with him because he had admitted to accidentally as he claimed. Nope, I couldn’t be with him because he was an accessory to murder. And I surely couldn’t be with him because he was unstable in every way, and on every single level.
But at that moment, in a way I wished that I could. In a way I wished that there were two of me so that Polo and Eddie both could have a part of me. At that moment, I realized that I felt more for Polo than I wanted to, or that I was actually willing to admit, and I was for certain that what Polo felt for me was love; at least some kind of form of it. He didn’t show it like most people but I was sure that he loved me to the best of his ability.
But I also knew that no matter what I told myself, no matter what I felt, no matter how attractive Polo was and how good his sex was, there no doubt in my mind that I had a stronger chance with happily-ever after with Eddie than I did with Polo because whether we’d tried now, or had over ten years ago, I was sure that Polo would have been the wrong husband…too.
****************************
Chapter 8
Since meeting Polo at the store, everything seemed to be better.
I knew Eddie’s lies, though he didn’t know that I knew, but having some form of the truth did seem to ease my mind. Though I couldn’t discuss what Polo had told me with him, it seemed to make me feel better just knowing them. Eddie hadn't really did anything too bad other than be dishonest with me. Polo had been the one to do all of the dirty work. And I wasn’t even going to mention Micki and all of the things she conveniently forgot to mention.
I did wonder why she’d lied on Polo though. Why she’d said that she had a feeling that he had been doing crazy things to her and made it like he had been desperately pursuing her. I figured that she was probably trying to scare me and keep me from continuing my affair with him since she’d thought that it was a bad
idea from the beginning.
But now that I knew, and now that I was no longer consumed with my thoughts or continuously looking for something, things, Eddie, and our marriage, were better than ever.
There were a few things and thoughts that found their way to my conscious every now and then, but I tried my best not to entertain them. Like why Polo and Eddie, and even Micki had gone through so much trouble to keep what had happened to Vanessa from me; especially if it was just an accident. And most certainly since Polo had been the one to commit the crime.
So what had been the big deal?
And I often wondered why Micki never mentioned having an older sister that had passed away and why were there no pictures of her. I hadn't asked Polo much about Micki’s and Vanessa’s sisterhood, but I wished that I had. He hadn't offered the information so maybe he didn’t know either, but it still didn’t explain why Micki wouldn’t have told me something like that, especially about Polo, and especially to detour me from having an affair with him.
It just seemed a little off. But whether it was the whole truth or at least part of it, I was glad to finally at least know something. So, it was what it was.
Polo was still riding by sometimes and checking Eddie’s phone, they were talking all the time and Eddie and the kids often went to visit him. Of course he never suggested that I go along. Most of the time Eddie wouldn’t even tell me. I would only find out by reading his text messages or if one of the kids said that they saw Uncle Polo that day.
“Go by and water my plants for me.”
“Why?” I asked Mama.
“Because. Me and---me and my friend decided to go on a last minute road trip and we’re already right here near the highway, so we’re just going to jump on it and get going. We’re not even going to pack. We will just pick up clothes as we go,” she said.
By friend, I knew that she meant Patrice’s lawyer but I didn’t say anything.
“Just go do what I said. I’ll see you when I get back,” Mama said and hung up.
Well, I was glad to see that she was living a little. If she was happy, then I was happy too. So, I guess I could just leave it at that.
I told Eddie where I was going and headed to Mama’s to do as I was told. I hadn't been over there since the time I’d popped up to give her the money and some her getting down to business.