by MV Kasi
Soon, they had lunch delivered from outside and caught up on what each of their classmates were doing. Soon it was almost evening time and Mahi suggested that they go to the upstairs balcony for some fresh air.
Mahi filled up some plates with snacks, and Jhanvi opened a wine bottle and served it into some steel glasses since Mahi didn't have any wine glasses yet.
"To our everlasting friendship. Now make eye contact," Jhanvi toasted.
They clinked their glasses together and sipped as they saw someone on the opposite balcony. It was Samrat and he was talking on his cell phone in a sleeveless workout shirt and shorts.
Mahi couldn't take her eyes off him.
"Red hot dude and eye candy alert," Ashwini announced dramatically.
"Wait. Isn't that Tarzan? Oh my god. Why is he still living in his old house when he's a...a...billionaire I think?" asked Jhanvi.
Mahi was still staring at him. "I asked him the same thing on the first day and he almost bit my head off saying it was none of my business," she said absently.
Samrat looked towards Mahi's house and saw the group of women watching him keenly. He scanned everyone but stopped and stared at Mahi for several grim seconds before he turned away to get back inside his house.
Everyone was extremely quiet for a few seconds.
"Holy fudge! That was really hot and he totally checked you out Mahi," said Jhanvi.
"What? No. That's a glower. He probably wants me dead and gone from here," said Mahi.
"Oh puhleez," said Ashwini. "One of the times my hubby glowered at me like that, I gave birth to our second daughter nine months later."
Everyone giggled at that information.
"Naah. He's bummed at me. He pretty much thinks I have ulterior motives and am scheming to ruin his family. He thinks I'm a loose woman who is out to seduce all the hapless men," said Mahi with a frown.
"I don't think so Mahi. It looked like he wanted to eat you up. And that's the same look he used to give you in college too and you were oblivious to it. You were with Sidhu at that time," said Parvathi.
Mahi was stunned. "Oh please. Samrat hated me back then. Remember what I did to his sister and then to him? I was a mean bitch back then," she said cringing.
"We all were. But we've come a long way. All of us have changed," said Smitha
"Yeah. It started out as simple ragging, but it got out of control. We were ragged by our seniors too, but we went too far with Ananya," said Parvathi.
"Sidhu married her and they have a thirteen year old daughter," Mahi said softly.
Everyone was quiet and they didn't appear shocked.
"You girls knew that already, didn't you?" Mahi asked.
All of them nodded silently.
"Sidhu was so heartbroken Mahi. We even thought he would kill himself. And later, all of a sudden after a couple of months he announced his marriage to Ananya who just completed her third year. Obviously by now you must have done the math and found out why they had to get married," said Jhanvi softly.
"Sidhu slowly lost in touch with all of us too. Maybe he found it too painful to associate with us because we must have reminded him of you," said Smitha.
Mahi told them about how she met Sidhu's and Ananya's daughter Srishti. Then the incidents during the birthday party.
Jhanvi was outraged. "How dare the Juniors speak to you like that!"
"I think they were being protective of Ananya and felt threatened thinking that I was trying to steal back Sidhu. And they are right about me being the most unlikely bride. Samrat and I would definitely make a match made in hell," said Mahi smiling.
"Don't support them Mahi! They can crow women empowerment from rooftops and write and watch about powerful modern women every day, but when they actually meet a woman who didn't lead their idea of perfect life, they begin casting whore accusations or worse. They need a swift kick in their asses," said Ashwini.
Mahi smiled. "True. But I still think they wanted to protect Ananya and warn me off Sidhu."
Mahi's friends were silent.
"Do you still have feelings towards Sidhu, Mahi?" asked Parvathi tentatively.
"What? No. Not those kind of feelings anyway that a woman would have towards a man she loves. When I saw Sidhu, I felt nostalgic and affectionate towards him. I didn't feel the pain or crave him in anyway. I felt happy for him, knowing he has his own family whom he loves dearly. Whereas with Samrat—" Mahi broke off with a blush.
"Oh. My. God. Whaaaat? With Samrat what?" asked Jhanu.
"Well...I kissed and made out with Samrat," Mahi blurted out and covered her mouth with both hands. Just like during their college days confessing to each other about their make out sessions with their boyfriends.
"Whaat? Oh wow. How? Spill!" asked Ashwini.
"Ashu!" admonished Parvathi, but looked curiously at Mahi.
Ashwini laughed. "Oh come on...No matter how old people are, or what background they are, it's the universal truth that people are curious about what happens in other's bedrooms. And our gang has never been the shy and retiring kind. So spill."
Mahi laughed and told them about her and Samrat's meeting on her first day back and then about her getting a job at his company, ending with how they made out when Samrat dropped her home after Srishti's party.
"That's so hot, Mahi! You are messing with his head so much by trying to seduce him. He might snap and tear your clothes off one day, and take you up on your offer, probably on the floor like an uncivilized primitive, living up to his name, Tarzan," Ashwini said dreamily.
They all stared at Ashwini.
Ashwini grinned."What? My husband is in Atlanta for a month and I'm missing our sexy times like crazy."
Mahi smiled.
"So what are you going to do about Tarzan then?" asked Smitha.
Mahi shook her head. "I don't know...I feel like a teenager each time I see Samrat. I don't understand what's going on and why I can't control how I feel around him. I'm pissed at him and he's pissed at me, yet I want him to smile at me. I came back to India to start over, and not to fall madly in lust with Samrat."
"Oh my god, lust?" asked Ashwini with a grin.
"Yeah, horrible lust that I'm unable to control. My brain looks at him and thinks, so what if he's hot and brilliant? He's a revenge seeking, judgmental, clean freak ass. And then my body looks at him and thinks, well hello there sexy, come be naked with me and make me yours. I tried to convince my body several times, but each time he's around, it jumps up and craves his touch," said Mahi with a slight frown.
"Then do it. Both of you are single and ready to mingle. Jump Tarzan's bones. Let Tarzan bone you!" encouraged Ashwini.
Parvathi shook her head grinning. "Can you believe that people who work under Ashu are actually terrified of her? They even dubbed her the cold bitch pushy manager because she manages her teams with an iron hand."
Ashwini grinned back. "Hey work is work, and my teams better follow the rules, and focus on their jobs during work. I didn't become an IT director at thirty five by being a wuss. And being a woman I need to work twice as hard and be twice as harsh. And besides we all compartmentalize. Work me vs girlfriend me are pretty different."
Mahi smiled. "True. I'm definitely different at work and behave differently with different sets of people. With you girls, I'm still the teenage girl from our college."
Her friends chimed in with the same sentiment.
"So? Will you act on it, then?" asked Parvathi.
Mahi looked uncertain. "Even if I wanted to do the dirty deeds with him, he isn't interested. Remember what I did to his scholarships and then that grabby kiss accusation I threw at him? I have apologized to him several times, but he hasn't forgiven me yet. I'm just hoping he doesn't arrange a hit man to take me out."
Parvathi shook her head. "No. He's definitely interested. I've noticed him watching you many times during our college too. I know he was into you then and maybe even now," she insisted.
"I don't think he's into me. Attracted,
maybe. And even if he wants more, I don't want to get involved with anyone seriously. I've just started to settle and have you girls back in my life. I prefer to enjoy the girlie bonding time than be in some messy emotional relationship. Besides, I never ever want to get married again and be under the control of another husband," said Mahi, shuddering slightly.
Her friends were silent.
"Mahi, not all husbands are like that. Marriage is an equal partnership where you can marry someone who is like your best friend," said Jhanvi.
Mahi sighed. "I know all that. But I'm messed up with so many issues. Mommy issues, daddy issues, baby issues, commitment issues, just to name a few. I'm not in the mental space to let anyone in right now. I just don't want any added drama in my life."
Jhanvi smiled sadly. "Hate to break it you Mahi, but wherever you go, there will always be drama. Most of us are all like that, pretty high maintenance. People are complex human beings with a lot of hang ups. Just because you ended up with one asshole doesn't mean you'll end up with another one."
"I was reluctant at first too Mahi. But then I found the perfect partner in my second husband, Nitin. I showed him hell initially, but he was so patient with me and my son. Soon I gave in. And I'm glad I did," said Smitha.
Mahi nodded. "I know I might be open to a physical relationship at this point, and definitely not a long lasting emotional one leading to marriage and babies. I was with two men in my life. One was my ex who didn't care for my satisfaction at all. The other was Rahul, who pitied me, and treated me like a charity case and a delicate flower in bed that could snap easily. I just want to experience some wild passion with no control at least once in my lifetime. I know there are other things that are more important in life and can be fulfilling, but I want to pamper myself with what I want right now, and not simply do things that society expects me to do. Especially if my actions don’t hurt anyone else in the process.”
Her friends nodded in understanding.
“True. As long as your partner and you set the right expectations, there is nothing stopping you from satisfying each other," said Smitha.
"Except, I might be called a whore or similar compliments from people," said Mahi with a wry smile.
"Mahi, some idiot's judgmental words are not going to hurt you. We all love you and support you in any decisions you make,” said Jhanvi.
All her other friends chimed in with the same sentiment and Mahi felt very happy that they had her back, just like during their college days. She knew that even if she were to murder someone, they would first help her hide the body, and then ask questions later. Every girl or woman needed friends like hers.
Later that evening, when her friend's left, Mahi felt like she was finally where she belonged.
CHAPTER 26
The monsoon season had started and it was raining cats and dogs. Mahi was leaving for a three week business trip to San Francisco the next day. Rajeev was visiting her and stayed until four o'clock, waiting for the rain to stop. When it didn't give any indication of ever stopping, he decided to leave.
Mahi, grabbed one of her umbrellas to see Rajeev off at her gate.
"You should stay inside. It's raining pretty heavily. I'll see myself out. My car is parked right outside your gate."
"Don't be silly Rajeev. I'll come with you until the gate, otherwise you'll be soaked. As it is driving in this rain seems a little risky."
The driving on Hyderabad roads was almost equivalent to a super complicated video game where one needed an extra set of eyes and ears along with super fast reflexes. Add a pouring rain to the mix and it made things much scarier. And she was yet to buy a car to drive by herself around the city.
She grabbed an umbrella that was big enough to protect both Rajeev and her from the downpour. She stood waiting just outside the gate while continuing to wave until the car disappeared from the view. She was just about to turn back when she felt her neck prickling in awareness. Immediately her eyes went to the balcony of the house opposite to her and clashed with another set of eyes that were staring at her in a brooding manner.
She was almost about to wave in a flirtatious manner when something about Samrat's expression stopped her. The hair on her neck rose in awareness and she felt a tingling in her body along with a strong sense of déjà vu.
She recalled the last time they stood staring at each other in the rain.
Fourteen years ago:
It was a week after the cheating allegations and also the day she had agreed to marry Dinesh upon her parents' insistence. She had been crying continuously for a week because of what she was about to do to Sidhu. Her eyes were red and puffy, and no amount of makeup could cover the fact that she had been crying. But Dinesh hadn't even asked her about it. He was just glad that she made her final decision and agreed to marry him within the next week.
It was raining heavily that day and at her parents' insistence, she had just seen Dinesh off near the gate with an umbrella while staring blankly at a distance.
Just then she felt someone's eyes on her and knew who it was before she even looked up. Standing right there on the balcony of the opposite house was Samrat. He was watching her broodingly. He didn't seem angry or furious. He just had an intense look that seemed to judge her and at the same time made her aware of what she had done.
If it had been the week before, she wouldn't have hesitated to immediately flip him off with her middle finger. But the last three days had changed her drastically.
The moment their eyes clashed, she felt something shift. It felt monumental, almost as if she knew that her entire life would never be the same again, and that the girl she was before would be lost forever.
*****
Mahi didn't remember how long they had stood staring at each other that particular rainy day fourteen years ago, but she was right about the fact that her life had never been the same again after that moment.
She shivered slightly when she felt a similar premonition of another radical shift that might occur in her life. She tore her eyes off from Samrat and ran inside her house in panic. Her heart was thudding loudly and her hands were shaking. Wrapping her arms around herself, she kept telling herself that she was being foolish.
"Just a reaction to a hot, studly and available neighbor you made out with last week. He's just making you feel hot and bothered. Nothing else."
She went into her kitchen and drank some ice cold water to calm down. When the doorbell rang, she immediately knew who was standing on the other side. She was torn between wanting to open the door to face what was to come vs. running inside the bedroom to lock, and forever hide under the blankets.
Slowly, she went towards the door, as though in a trance, and stopped a couple of feet away from it.
"Mahi, open the door. I need to see you right now."
Her heart began to thud even more loudly, and she didn't make any noise, or even move from her spot, hoping that he would leave soon.
"I know you can hear me, and I can feel you standing close to the door. I'm not leaving until we talk."
Samrat sounded as though he would wait outside all evening until she opened the door.
Composing herself, she opened the door with a huge fake smile pasted on her face, and then felt a momentary shock when she saw him.
He was wet and dripping near the doorstep with an ominous expression on his face.
Still pasting the wide fake smile on her face, she asked, "Aren't you a little too old to be running around and playing in the rain?"
Samrat's expression didn't change, and he stood quietly for several seconds, watching her as though searching her face for something.
"You know why I'm here," he said softly, as though he didn't want to spook her.
But she wasn't just spooked, she was terrified, and she was almost sure that he could hear her heart thudding loudly in her chest, along with the roaring noise in her ears.
Her smile slipped slightly, and she was determined to kill whatever was happening between them. "Are you here
like the cliché neighbor to borrow some sugar? Or or...maybe to lecture me on attacking you last week and letting me know how you didn't appreciate it—"
She broke off when he stepped inside and closed the door before pulling her into his arms. One of his hands molded her against his body, and the other was tangled in her hair to hold her head still. Her hands automatically crept into his wet hair, clutching him.
Watching her keenly, he slowly started to lower his head towards her.
She could feel the urgency building and then rushing through her body. Not wanting to wait a second longer, she pulled his head closer to join their lips in a hard kiss.
He responded back with a hungry desperation, pulling her closer. She pushed him slightly off her and ran her hands under his wet shirt, gently raking his chest with her nails, making him shudder.
Not breaking their kiss, he pushed her towards a wall and lifted her off the ground. She wrapped her legs around his waist, pulling him even closer. She could feel his need in the obvious arousal and also in the way his body was trembling slightly as he kissed her.
Pushing her slightly higher, he broke their kiss to place small nibbling kisses on her neck.
She moaned into his ear. "God, I want you. I've been going crazy imagining us together for so long...and that day is finally here," she said and pulled his mouth closer for a long kiss.
After a few seconds, Samrat froze and then wrenched his mouth free to stare at her, gasping and breathing heavily. "I want you too, and not just for today, but until we both are completely sated. It might take a week or several months. Will you stay with me in San Francisco for the next three weeks? I know that you are going there for your training. I'll be there as well for my conferences."
She understood what he was trying to propose. She had wanted the same thing, but she felt uncertain about the duration. "I think three weeks are okay Samrat, but months? I don't know if I can promise you that. Maybe we can decide on that as we pass that hurdle. But are you sure about this? What about our past, my past, my—"