I gave Kayden a sharp shove with my elbow, knocking him off my chair and setting him on fire in the same breath. A small smile curved my lips as I watched him explode into smoke and recover, cursing in a language I didn't know.
"Like I know," Kayden shrugged, his tone surprisingly nonchalant. "It's not like all us demons share a same brain. She's not even a full demon, anyway."
I snapped my fingers, a light bulb going off in my head. "What if it has to do with the fact that she isn't a full demon?" When neither one of them caught on, waved my arms. "You know, she's part demon, part Nephilim, like Serena said. She carries our blood."
"Then why not him?" Kayden nodded towards Ari. "He's Nephilim, just like you. Same blood."
I shook my head, the smile spreading on my face. "He's not. We come from different angels." I reached into my blouse and pulled out the small, wire-wrapped glass heart around my neck. "Supposedly my father was Michael. This was his gift left to me. The emerald earrings were also from him, but given to another Nephilim he had created."
Ari took this in bits, eyes darkening with thought. The second he said it, his suggestion rang true. "Maybe it has nothing to do with Essallie, and everything to do with her father."
"A legacy of vengeance, and on kids no less? Maybe you are a little dark, after all," Kayden said, giving Ari a wink. He walked around me, careful not to come in contact, and made for the fridge. His rummaging inside dearly drowned out his words. "So she's a pawn in the chess board, and us boys are like her bishop and knight or some crap like that." Head out of the fridge, he held his prize up into the air; a fish, most likely freshly killed. "And now she's being made to wade into the battlefield without flanks."
I turned away from the smell, nearly gagging. "If that's the case," I continued, nose pinched and face pointed down at the ground. "Then she isn't going to stop. We have to get to her first."
Kayden smacked the fish onto the island countertop. He dug his knife-like nails into the skin, peeling it off with ease as he drew back. "Easier said than done, Essie dear. The Queen's doesn't do as much as she used to. More often than not she's in the center of her castle, ticking off the hours by eating mortals for satisfaction."
I saw Ari shudder. "What ever happened to good old parties?"
Kayden glowered at him. "I'm sure this is going to be hard for you to grasp, given you're what, nineteen at the most? But parties in Charon aren't exactly as much of a hot commodity as they used to be. When you attend the same string of parties hosted by the same people for the last 300 years, the words 'drab' and 'suicidal' start to mix in sentences."
"Even the better ones?"
"Better ones are repeated, of course, but eventually those get boring too. Think about it. Imagine if it was your birthday every day all year long. I bet you'd want to inject rat poison in your cake just to avoid another one." Kayden ripped a strip of pink meat off, examined it briefly, then tossed the uncooked chunk onto his plate. "Could you imagine seeing the same people attend those parties- or worse, seeing a former lover everywhere you went for the last 300 years? Now that's sting worthy."
I removed myself from the island countertop, lingering in the far end of the kitchen where the hallway and entrance frame met. Thankfully, the smell wasn't as bad with the distance between us.
"I don't know," I pondered aloud, throwing Kayden a narrowing stare. "I'd imagine it would be the opposite. At some point, a connection was shared, and when they die, so does a part of you. If it were me, I'd want to keep them close for as long as time permits."
Ari and Kayden exchanged glances, eyebrows raising all around. "How typical of a woman," Kayden said, knocking the breath from my lungs. "To cling to anything even if it only offered a drop of pleasure among a full glass of pain. If I didn't know how simple-minded you are, I'd say you were one hell of a plotter and revenge-planning wench."
My eyes flashed, and fire burst from my hands and arms, growing with rage. I could barely talk from how pissed I was. "I'm typical? Funny coming from a demon who sees it okay to manipulate a girl to save his own hide." I turned my gaze to Ari, livid. "Discuss with him whatever you want, I'm done talking to the child of the group."
I stalked out of the room and down the hall, fuming. Who was he to think it's okay to call me out and consider himself a saint? For a centuries and beyond aged creature, he had one hell of a funny way to play selective memory bits to his advantage.
Of course, I assumed he wanted nothing to do with the memory of our kiss, and it didn't take a genius to figure out why. Nothing was in it for him. My only playing card was the beating heart in my chest, and that had a limited time left. Sooner or later my guard would no doubt drop, and he'd slice me in half easier than he cut his fish.
Footsteps sounded behind me, but I had no desire to look back. If it was Kayden, I would light up faster than a Roman candle and take the whole hallway with me. If it was Ari, I'd probably find Kayden and still do the same thing.
My fingers jabbed at the elevator buttons when Ari's hand caught me by the wrist. "Ignore him, Essallie. He's just some flimsy air-headed demon."
"Don't talk to me," I hissed, yanking my hand free. I started down the opposite hallway, deciding on a random door to open and get away from him. "I don't want to talk to you, or that demon or anyone. Back off."
Ari ignored my protests, following close enough that I could feel the heat of his skin. When I reached out for a door handle, he caught me and spun me around quicker than I could resist. "You can't go wandering these halls alone. There's more behind some of these doors than you'll be able to handle."
"Let me go!" I struggled in his grasp, kicking aimlessly at his legs.
"I'm serious, Essallie!" The tone of his voice caught my attention, and when I looked up at his eyes I found them hard as steel, colder than ice. "Some things in this place aren't meant to be seen."
"Speaking from experience?" I countered, sneering childishly. "What, am I going to find dead bodies stored away for a rainy day?"
Ari didn't answer me.
I ignored the way my skin went cold, goosebumps rising high off my arms. I had seen enough dead bodies to last me a lifetime; I didn't want to go stumbling upon more. "Look," I said with a quivering tone. "All I know is you had damn well better take me to a room where I can set something on fire. Otherwise I'm going back and kicking that smirking smart-aleck so hard in the face he'll be tasting ass for months."
He stared at me for a moment, eyes searching my face, but for what I didn't know. "I think," he started to say. "I know exactly where we can go."
Taking me by the hand, he led me back to the elevator in the center of both halls. We used it to go down several floors, but when the doors opened it looked identical to the hallways we had just left, save for the small painting on the opposite wall depicting a dungeon entrance.
Ari continued to guide me down a small stretch of hallway, coming to a stop at a door just like all the others in the hall. A creepy feeling of dread rolled through me, and I had half the nerve to ask Ari if Lilix got her decorating ideas from The Shining.
Opening the door, he ushered me inside, coming in behind me and shutting the door before I had a chance to look around. No lights were on in the room, catapulting us into an abyss-like black and I got the eerie sensation that most of the room was empty, spacious.
I could feel Ari's breath hot on my neck, warm hands touch the sides of my arms. "Go ahead," he breathed softly. "Let the flames begin."
I didn't need to be told twice. Fire lit over my hands, exploding to life with ease. The glow from the flames casted jagged shaped shadows along the walls and brought the front of the room to light. As soon as I saw the small pillar shapes, I grinned.
Releasing the tension in my shoulders, I breathed out a sigh of relief and moved my hands forward, fire shooting off and lighting the wicks. In less than a minute every candle displayed on a counter top, shelf, false chandelier, and notches on the wall was lit, rich candlelight casting the room in a sultry, soft g
low.
The fire died from my hands as I watched, amazed. The whole room was nothing but candles in patterns and rows, forming a display unlike anything I had ever seen.
"Ari, this is beautiful," I whispered, transfixed on the wavering glow and flickering shadows. I turned my head up to meet his gaze. "How, where did you find this?"
His fingers ran down the sides of my arms, clasping my hands in his. He brought me further into the room with him, centering us around the swirl of dancing flames.
"When I first met Lilix, I was going through a painful moment. She brought me to this room and told me to light every candle by hand until I wasn't mad anymore."
"Did it work?"
"Not really," he shrugged and laughed. "I ended up doing it five times over before I finally calmed down and admired the way the room looked fully lit."
I stood there in front of him, very aware of how he continued to watch me closely. His eyes stood out sharp amidst the dim light, two little sparks of life among a swaying wave of flame.
"Hey Ari? About this morning," I managed to get out before he leaned in closer to me with half-lidded eyes. I stepped back with a jolt, knocking one of the candles to the floor, hot wax spilling all around the floor cresting my heels. I lost my balance and arched back, falling right onto a whole table covered in candles.
In one steady move he closed the gap between us and caught me, arms wrapped around my waist, safe and secure.
He hovered so close, to the point nothing could come between us. Suddenly everything came into perception; the weight of his body pressed against mine, the way my hands twisted like vines around his neck, refusing to let him go. His eyes had darkened to a smoldering turquoise. I could feel his rough hands moving gently over the small of my back, cradling me. It felt like every part of me belonged there, steady in his embrace.
"I can't..." Against every screaming cell in my body, I pulled out of his arms. Instantly I felt cold, empty, and I wanted nothing more than to run straight back for his warmth.
He looked confused, but didn't question my choice. "Okay." Taking my hand, he gently ran a thumb over in small, soothing circles. "So, who hurt you?"
Laughter twisting between nervous and afraid, escaped my lips. "What makes you think someone hurt me?"
"You're going to laugh." His head turned downward to stare at our joined hands.
"That corny, huh?" I tried to keep the conversation light, but his hesitance only made the twisting in my gut more intense. "Spill it cowboy."
Slowly, he turned back up to look at me, his scattered blonde hair like a framing halo. His eyes were piercing, brutally truthful. "One look in your eyes and I just know." The faintest of blushes bloomed on his cheeks. "Someone dragged you through the mud."
I felt my breath catch in my throat. Where the room had been warm before, now it was as chilled as a frozen tundra. I hadn't planned on peeling back the layers of my damaged past. I wasn't ready to be this exposed, this raw and vulnerable.
Swallowing, I found my voice. "Not mud so much as blood and personal gain."
Something in his eyes wavered, and for a second I saw it. He knew exactly who I meant when the words 'blood' and 'personal gain' left my lips. "Well, don't worry," Ari said, tipping a finger under my chin and bringing my gaze to his. "You don't have to do anything you don't want to. But, I do hope you get past it one day. It would be a shame to see such a beautiful woman go to waste."
I kissed him; a quick peck on the cheek was the most I could control myself over. "Once again my past surfaces to light." I shook my head, frowning. "Why don't I ever learn anything about you?"
"Because my past is... nothing worth talking about," Ari struggled to say, his skin paling slightly. He straightened us both before pulling back, making for the door.
I did like he had done to me; grabbing one of his wrists, I turned him around, shaking my head. "Oh no, it doesn't work like that. You said you want me to stop using my past like a crutch. That means we have to talk about other things, and it makes sense to talk about you. I know almost nothing about you, but I'm supposed to trust you. It doesn't work like that."
He chewed on his lower lip, and I could see the war in his eyes. If he said no, he would be backtracking and giving me room to continue my moping existence; if he said yes, he'd have no choice but to tell me a bit about himself.
Good won over evil. Ari scowled and crossed his arms over his chest, bitterness written in every inch of his stance. "What do you want to know?"
"Anything really," I confessed, hoping it didn't sound as desperate and vague as it did in my head. "Where you're from, family or friends, where your Watcher is. You're like a mystery to me, Ari."
Tension kept his shoulders tight, but his expression flickered with an ounce of sadness as he spoke. "I came from the South, a little spot in Nebraska. Mom died early from a massive car crash."
"And your Dad?"
"A Vens killed him." A haunted look hollowed out his eyes.
"I'm sorry." My hand rested on his own, cold to his hot. "Any siblings?"
He shook his head. "No. Only child from the start, only child to the end. As for friends, I really only had one. Her name was Bethie, short for Bethanie. She was a real angel, not because of magic in her veins, but the compassion in her heart. She told me a little quote I'll never forget."
"What was it?"
"We always reach for the light for clarity, but it's the dark moments that shape us and give us vision. It's the dark moments that makes us into who we are."
I stood there in the silence, staring at our joined hands. His words sounded so clear, like I was finally pushing past the surface of the water and gasping in air. But the shattered look in his eyes told me there was something deeper to his words. I wondered if this was Ari's first love, or a crush he carried a torch for.
"Ari," I said, a horrible thought coming to mind. "Was Bethanie your Watcher?"
His head shook again. "I can't, Essallie..."
"Yes, you can," I pressed, gripping his hand tighter. "Tell me about your Watcher."
The effect had been like telling Ari to jump off a bridge with no rope. His shattered gaze crumbled, revealing a broken and exposed soul.
"Yes, Bethanie was my Watcher. She's been dead for four months now."
CHAPTER TEN
OF LAMB AND BLOOD
When I got back to my room, it had already begun to rain. The bright, sunny morning sky had been replaced with a grey, wretched overcast as thunder rumbled in the distance. I flopped onto the unmade bed, wondering about everything.
So we had a vague, and still unproven, theory for why the Queen was out for my blood. It certainly didn't make me feel any better, especially since now there wasn't a chance for doubt. Until this all resolved, I couldn't go home to the one person I wanted to see. And because of this problem, I was stuck with two boys, one who twisted my heart into something dark and one who thought it fair to make me fall for him.
I wanted them both to go away; I didn't need either of them. Kayden was just a pain, constantly reminding me of how I fell to a petty game. Ari was pulling more rabbits of his mysterious wizard hat than I could keep count of, between his dead Watcher or crush or whatever and family and weird grass-growing ability. Both were two very difficult pills to swallow at the same time.
I grabbed a nearby pillow and shoved it into my face, groaning. It shouldn't be this hard to fix a problem! Why couldn't I just find out the next time the Queen would be out at an event or mostly alone, drop in and kick her ass, and move on in life?
Excitement caught me so fast that I rolled off the bed and smacked onto the floor. "Bingo!" I shouted, and took off from my room to go down the hall.
As soon as I rounded the corner of my door, I nearly ran head-first into Kayden. He jumped back in shock, but not before his hands flung out between us and brushing over my skin. Like a match striking to light, fire crackled between us in a dazzle of warning blue sparks.
"Essallie," he breathed, his dark eyes b
rimming with excitement. His chest rose and fell rapidly, and I realized he had been running down the hall when I crossed into his path. "I was just coming to get you."
I could feel myself instantly splitting into two, like always when I became involved with him. Half of me wanted to shun him for the jerk he was, cold shoulder him harder than dry ice. The second half preferred the idea of daydreaming a second kiss with him.
I mentally shook the second half of me out of the picture. This wasn't the time to swoon or sway or whatever lovesick idiots did. Not that I was one of those. Narrowing my eyes with discontent, I did my best to appear disdainful of him. "I'm extending you an olive branch when I say I suggest there's an apology involved in this conversation?"
"For what?" He cocked an eyebrow, the action instantly bringing the heat in my veins to a growing boil. "For saying what was on my mind?"
"For calling me a calculating bitch, for starters." I kept my gaze icy. "We can settle you manipulating me later with some flowers or melting your face or something."
He kept his face expressionless as possible, but I could spot the carefully masked twitches of his face fighting to grin or laugh. "Oh, Essallie, when are you ever going to learn?" His head shook, black hair swaying with motion. "It's sink or swim in this world. Even your closest friend will have an ulterior motive somewhere in their back pocket. If you're looking for begging or some sniveling act of pleading for forgiveness, you've got the wrong guy."
"I see," I turned to head back to my room, refusing to meet his eyes even from the sideway glance. "Then I guess this is it."
"This is what?" His words were hard.
I didn't respond, praying the element of surprise would play in my favor. In one move I had uncrossed my arms, fire blazing over them, and grabbed Kayden by the neck. With a sharp thud his body stood pinned between me and the wall, spirals of blue flame rolling over his skin like a fast-spinning web.
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