"I'd choose your words carefully," I warned him, locking eyes with him. "You'll find I'm incredibly forgiving when the right words are strung together in a sentence."
"Really? This again?" He snickered shortly before grimacing in pain. Horns started to peak through his forehead, his true form appearing under the stress of the flames. "You tried killing me before, remember? You don't have the heart for it."
Adrenaline twisted inside my body, my heart taking off with fervor. It was like someone had doused my flames with gasoline; blue and black fire began to run off my hands and over Kayden, burning him with a sickening smell.
His eyes briefly widened, the first flicker of fear. "Essie-"
"Make it count, Kayden." It was all I could say, my brain seeming to have disconnected from the rest of me. An odd haze clouded my vision like a thick film, and for a second I felt nothing but a hazy weightlessness in limbo. One heartbeat later, it all came back into perfect clarity.
Kayden still had his eyes on me, the fear still present. Something else was there, too, but what exactly it was I couldn't place. His back arched as he let out a gasp of pain, the fire spreading further and digging deeper into him.
"I know how we can get to the Queen," he spat out with a gasp.
I felt my eyes widen, the shock disabling the overruling power of my flames. Acting on impulse, Kayden exploded into fine black smoke, snaking into my room and away from my fiery grasp.
I stalked in after him, his body filling back to normal near the vanity at the other end of the room. Pink and raised scars covered his body, yet already they started to fade. But I could barely get past the fact that he had said exactly what I had been thinking just as I went to leave my room. Hesitation laced my words as I spoke. "What do you mean you know how to get to the Queen?"
"Exactly what I said, silly girl." His eyes sparked back to life the second he spoke, a mischievous and wickedly dark glint in those swirling orbs. In his hands was a paper I hadn't seen at first. "I found an in to Lucretia. There is a socialite ball in a week, one she is required to attend."
"You're full of bull," I cracked back at him, the fire still running over my hands and arms, brushing over my chest and neck like a self-knitting turtleneck. "You're only doing this to get at me. Congratulations, you've pissed me off. Now leave."
"Not until you listen," he declared, his voice dark and rumbling. "I came here to help, and dammit that's what I'm going to do."
"I'll believe it when I see it-"
"After this morning's discussion," he continued over my mutterings, eyes thin as slits. "I thought about things, specifically how to get to the source of the problem. It hit me like the Great Wall falling on me-"
"Oh, how one can wish that was real-"
"Lucretia attends one key party, every year. And I bet you'll know why the second I show you this." Kayden was over at my side in a flash, spreading the paper out so I could see. It looked like a poster I had seen before, one that reminded me eerily of myself...
I snapped my head up to meet Kayden's gaze. "The play?" I couldn't believe it. The one time I stumble into Charon and embarrass myself beyond normal standards and here it's the tie to a party to get to the Queen. I was starting to smell one too many coincidences keeping the air clean.
"The very same. Come on," he reached for my hand, freezing centimeters from my skin. Fire crackled between us, daring the contact. He pulled his hand away and made for the door, catching my eyes over his shoulder. "I've already told Ari to meet us in the drawing room again to discuss a plan."
"Hold on," I beat him to the door, putting myself between him and the exit. With one good shove, the door snapped shut. "We're not finished yet." It was now or never, I told myself. If I didn't stand my ground, Kayden would continue to play tennis with my heart. Too much felt up in the air, floating at a dangerously high level, ready to collapse and crush me at any given moment. "Why are you really here?"
His expression shifted, irritation blending into his facial features. Somehow, he looked even more gloriously handsome while bitter and snippy. "Did you not hear me? I came here to help."
"No, I heard you. But I don't believe you." My voice was high and sickly sweet, like poisoned honey. "The last time we saw each other, you told me to my face that you knowingly manipulated me."
"I know what I said," he interjected. "I'm here to remedy that."
"Now you show up offering to be just as helpful as you were before your underhanded actions caught up with you." I pressed past his words, staring straight through him as if he had never materialized. "How can I trust you?"
"Essallie, please." His pained expression shocked me, catching me completely off guard. The strain in his voice was thick, his lips quivering as he struggled to grasp for words. "I need to explain."
I took a step back from his twitching hands, taking note of how tense he had twisted himself in a matter of seconds. "Explain what?"
He swallowed, closing his eyes as he took a sharp inhale of breath. "There are three things I have ever known in all of my existence. One, always have the upper hand. Two, never turn your back on an enemy." His lips pressed shut, thin and hard.
The pause prompted me. "And the third?"
Kayden's shoulders didn't move, leaving me to wonder if he was still breathing. His eyes opened and instantly locked on mine, a look so smoldering I found my heart quieting in my chest.
"Three, never let your emotions control you."
He closed the gap between us instantly, hands cradling my face as his lips met mine. Fire bloomed over my skin and onto his, enveloping us in the blue blaze in seconds, yet he continued to kiss me with hungry lips. His teeth nibbled at my lower lip before his lips traced over my jaw in a frenzy, then down my neck and collarbone.
My mind stalled, heart exploding in my chest. I barely had enough control to put my hands on his chest and shove him back as far as I could, trying to save him from the flames that began to burn deep into his skin. "Kayden, no."
The second he stepped back, his body burst into smoke. It hung lazily in the air, swirling around in a half-hearted tornado before his form began to take shape. As he filled in I noticed his skin had turned lighter and paler, pink scars littering his body once more. His eyes held the perfect mix of hauntingly sad and conflicted, a combination that made me want to reach out and kiss him again.
My breath came in short, choppy gasps. I could hardly force the anger into my words. "Are you insane? What the hell has come over you?"
"I don't know, Essallie," he confessed pitifully. "All I know is I've wanted to do that since the night in your bedroom when I saw your breaking in half. I wanted to fix you."
"Stop," I hissed, shaking from head to toe. Every inch of me screamed to run back into him. "I don't need you, or Ari, or any man to be whole and alive. Just because I'm the only girl around doesn't mean I have to be kissed and fawned over!"
His eyes betrayed every inch of the pain in his heart. I could see the armor he had so precariously built up cracking under my words, crumbling into dust.
"Essallie..."
"No," I turned around and fumbled for the door, yanking it open. I couldn't look over my shoulder, not with him standing there watching me, wondering if I'd cave and let my own armor crumble and fade. "Stop trying to think you can fix me. I'm not broken."
I stalked to the drawing room without him, making sure my eyes stayed strictly forward. I could feel the crumble starting in my chest, an aching feeling rippling from within.
It wasn't fair; Kayden had done exactly what I wanted, opened his blackened soul to me and let me in, and I had to be the right one and push him away. He was a demon, a lying and manipulative bastard who sought out only things that brought him gain. How could loving me, or whatever it is his emotions were telling him, play in his favor now? It felt too easy, like he was giving me exactly what I wanted. I would be cautious until I figured out his motive.
As soon as I stepped into the drawing room, my eyes spotted Ari. He seemed to
have been waiting for a while, arms crossed over his chest and one foot tapping impatiently. He had traded in his earlier clothes for an all-black get up; black pants, black t-shirt, and a black track jacket with two yellow stripes running across the left side of his chest.
"Have you seen Kayden? He told me to meet him in here as soon as he got you," Ari placed his hands behind his head, stretching. Through the mid-afternoon high sun lighting the room, I could see a thin layer of sweat over his skin.
I made sure to keep my eyes off of his, unsure if I would give away what had transpired in my room with Kayden if I looked Ari in the face. Ungluing my tongue from the roof of my mouth, I searched for an excuse buried in my brain. "I, I think he-"
"-is right here," Kayden's voice finished, and I looked up to the door. Sure enough there he was, the wounded expression I had seen on him last traded in for a cold, indifferent gaze. He barely offered me so much as a nod as he strode past me, coming to a stand between Ari and I.
"I was just sharing with Essallie in the hall that we have a way to the Queen," he said smoothly, not a single hitch in his voice. Ari regarded him coolly, nodding while he continued to stretch his back and arms. "Our earlier mention of parties reminded me of one event she never misses; a party for the new play of the moment."
"That Nephilim and demon play?" Ari asked, and I wondered if he had seen the posters too. "Ironic, given her blood status. How do we get to her? I imagine she'll be crawling with her personal guard and Vens alike."
"Easy," Kayden gave a cold, humorless smile. "We drop into the castle, get into her quarters, and wait for her to return after the party. The event is held on one end of the castle, and her quarters are on the opposite end. We'll have little trouble mingling in with the rest of the crowd there."
"Correction; you'll have no trouble, but I can't imagine the only two Nephilim in existence flying under the radar," I added.
Kayden didn't look at me. "You have your trinkets to blend in, that will cut you out of the vision of most. It's the guards and higher Vens that we'll have to dodge."
"And how do you propose that?"
"A blanket of haze, a-la vile and vicious demon," Kayden said with a bitter zest, dramatically bowing for extra effect.
I wasn't convinced. "So, you want to hover over me like a cloud of smoke? How the hell is that going to help?"
"Honestly, Essallie, have you no faith in me?" He rolled his eyes.
My teeth started to grind. "Actually, no, I don't." My gaze turned to Ari, eyes narrowed. "You're okay with this? No complaints about throwing me in the lion's den? Pretty sure going to the home of the big bad villain is the number one thing they say not to do in the books."
"If you're against it, fine," Kayden replied sarcastically. He now stood over near the windows, one hand lightly pressed against the pane of glass. "You said you didn't want to be treated like you're the squishy, unknowing human in some girly vampire novel. Here's your chance, so let's chop up this pretty lamb and serve it raw."
I looked from Ari's wary expression to Kayden's turned back. If there had ever been a moment I wanted to punch both of them, now would be the time. Thunder struck in my chest as the hairs along my back stood straight, my skin prickling with precognition.
"You want a death wish, you got it. I have no problem taking as many down with me as I can."
Kayden looked at me from over his shoulder, confusion buried between his eyes. He turned around fully, a dark laugh escaping his lips. "No one's saying you'll die."
"No one says I'll live, either," I pointed out with a wry smile.
Kayden's mood turned black. "We're confronting her, not slaughtering her in a pool of blood."
"Says you, the manipulating demon," I continued to battle with him. The room turned hot and stifling, and the fireplace jumped to life with a gust of ash and flame. "But you forget, I have a score to settle. If that means making a mess of some body parts, I won't mind."
The rest of the week rocked in limbo, like a person floating among a raft in the Bermuda Triangle. Kayden, Ari, and I all somehow managed to completely avoid another, catching only glimpses of one or the other passing through rooms.
It had been the first time in days that I'd had a moment to myself, one that didn't involve passing out or crying from heartache. Lilix's mansion was large enough to hold over a thousand people at any given time, yet I felt enclosed and cramped. No amount of lavish decor or carefully spaced rooms could keep the feeling at bay. It was almost as if I constantly felt like a pair of eyes rested on me, watching my every move while taking subtle notes.
As the days went by, I found myself exploring rooms within the mansion. Part of me had hoped opening random doors would bring Ari out from the shadows, bringing him to talk to me, even if only to say I wasn't allowed to explore. Instead, all I found was a crushing silence greeting me with every open door. The contents of most were barren; left over furniture draped in white sheets, broken violins and cellos, empty notebooks and abandoned half paintings. One thing did catch my eye though- a broken, aged wooden desk, the kind you'd find in an abandoned schoolhouse. I wasn't exactly sure what Ari had been trying to warn me about, except maybe that Lilix was just a messy housekeeper.
After I grew bored of exploring useless rooms, I started investigating the grounds around her mansion. No one had exactly told me how much land Lilix owned, just that most of the land in sight was hers. Turned out her property line extended as far as the eye could see, claiming rolling hills and a small river just a mile from the mansion.
I decided to take a sketchbook and head out to the river, soak up a little sun while finding a place to ground my head and heart. Making sure to sit a little ways off the bank, I found a cozy spot among some grass and flowers and took a seat.
The sight was beautiful; flowers identical to the ones in the floral shop Serena and I had been in were in full bloom. Mixing hues of tangerine and smoky violet brought to life the patch of grass along the river. While the sun, sitting high and bright, would have normally scorched me, a gentle breeze made the outdoors inviting and pleasant.
I flipped open my sketchbook and began to draw, starting with small, smooth lines across the page. Instantly I began to feel calm and relaxed, stress melting off my shoulders and leaving me with a weightless sensation. No pressure, no call to action, just a beautiful setting with open room.
As I continued to draw, I felt my mind slipping into a familiar limbo. Images, both good and bad, phased in and out of my head as segmented sentences paired with each photo. I thought of Ari, and how mixed up I felt with him and his awkward actions, yet couldn't deny the magnetic pull I felt for him. He clicked with me perfectly, understood exactly the kind of misery I did, two birds of a feather.
Then there was Kayden. A brooding, mysterious, borderline psychotic bastard who thought it was okay to play with my emotions. One minute he was colder than the Arctic, the next he would be reaching for me, an aching look in his eyes begging for me to step into his arms.
Both of them were ridiculous, that much was for sure. I didn't see the need to get wrapped up in another person when I could barely manage myself and my own pile of problems. Having someone else in my life, no matter how perfect or imperfect they were, wouldn't solve my own issues. It wouldn't save me from dying.
I pulled myself out of my head with a rough shake, a huge sigh escaping my lips. My eyes stared down at the sketchbook in my lap, another photo of an eye staring back at me. I must have drawn it in the midst of my half-hearted musings over the two boys.
Voices sounded off in the distance, whoops and yells and laughter filling the serene setting with noise. I stared off toward the house, spotting two familiar faces dressed in all black racing through the field, tackling each other on and off. My stomach immediately clenched, the thought of a Vens coming to mind. I dropped my sketchbook with a thud and rose to my feet, calling out fire to my hands and arms.
The figures came with alarming speed. One lanced into the air, sharper than a diam
ond-tipped arrow, heading straight for me. The other ran in a hazy blur, shifting from left to right in less than a blink of an eye.
"Lilix, don't land on her!" Ari's voice came from the running blur. My mind froze; Ari?
The second I put two and two together, he came into clarity. Ari was running, sprinting faster than anything I had ever seen. His short, platinum blonde hair laid flat against his head as he ran, allowing his startling blue eyes full exposure. His run reminded me of a cheetah dashing across the hot plains, locking on its prey with the intent to catch it at all costs.
Lilix on the other hand was graceful, a swan among buffalo. From her springing leap into the air, to the arching of her body, to her cleanly tucked landing, she was never without poise. Her hair had been pulled back into a loose ponytail, stray pieces pressed to her skin as she worked against the breeze. Her eyes were equally captivating like Ari's, only in a different way, for I knew these were from witchcraft, not a genetic gift.
They both landed in front of me, inches apart from another, laughing from the exhilaration of the sprint. Lilix placed a hand on Ari's shoulder and smiled warmly, pearly whites taking place on yet another piece of her that was perfect. A bubble of annoyance built in my chest, the beginning of something rude forming on my tongue.
Lilix beat me to speak. "Enjoying the fresh air?"
My rude retort slithered back into my throat as I fought not to laugh. Lilix may have looked gorgeous and had a perfect setting in her home, but it seemed she forgot to cast a spell on saving herself from speaking like a ditz.
I forced a smile onto my tightly stretched lips. "Oh, yeah, loving it. Nothing like a little pollen inhalation to brighten the day!"
Ari stifled back a laugh, his face twitching with exertion.
Lilix grinned, fighting to giggle herself. "Ari and I were just about to start some battle practices. You know, fighting techniques and that kind of thing. Care to join us?"
"Uhhh, sure?" I shrugged my shoulders, figuring there wouldn't be much harm in playing a little sparing with the two of them.
Obumbrate (The Illumine Series) Page 14